The McGilley Trilogy (29 page)

Colin moved in front of her, couldn’t resist fisting her hair and giving her a hard kiss and then pulled a blindfold from his pocket and tied it snugly around her eyes. “Tonight, I just want you to feel, Livie. Don’t think about anything, don’t worry about anything. I’ll take care of you.”

But who will take care of her heart when he broke it
, she wondered as the first stroke landed very lightly across her ass. The next stroke worked to help her shove that thought aside, the tingling stings from each of the five strands barely felt before they faded only to be reignited with the next, slightly harder slash. Colin set up a slow, rhythmic pace, moving from her buttocks down her thighs then around to her waist. Each slash had her swinging towards it, each snap of the leather just a touch harder, the ensuing pain sharper, her response higher with each stroke.

Soon, her mind emptied of everything but the sound of the flogger right before it connected with her tender skin and the arousal each painful stroke induced. Moaning, she arched her head back and her chest out as he landed a stroke on her right breast, one of the strands catching her nipple in a painful snap. The sting on her tender bud shot straight down to her pussy and she had to force herself to keep from pleading for him to move in that direction. She bit her lip as the next slash landed across her left breast, his aim once again perfect as her nipple received a sharp snap, her world consisting of darkness and stinging pleasure. Soon, she no longer heard the sounds of other people around her, lost track of time and space, her mind focused solely on the movements of her Master as he walked around her, her focus on anticipating where he would torment her next. Her pussy had never felt so empty, so needy, so swollen and wet. She wanted Colin, she wanted to be fucked and she wanted to come, in that order. She was on the verge of desperation when he landed a much lighter stroke on the bare flesh of her pussy, the shock and pleasure of that stroke making her cry out.

“Stay with me, Livie,” Colin told her softly as he once again snapped the flogger on the most sensitive part of her, smiling when her legs spread further and her hips thrust towards him. She was a magnificent sight, he thought as he eyed his work, taking pride in the faint pink stripes on her body, the tight, red nipples and the swollen, puffy lips with their damp proof of arousal.

Tossing aside the flogger, he couldn’t keep from kissing her again, his hands roaming softly over the flesh he had just abused, his fingers caressing each mark as he relished the feel of her slim nakedness against him.

Olivia whimpered against his mouth as he touched each line, the stroke of his fingers bringing back the sting, adding to her already rampaging arousal. Her skin tingled, felt highly sensitive; her nipples throbbed with an ache that speared straight down to her pussy. Pulsing with need, her sheath was filled with a warmth and aching need that infused her entire body.

“Master, please, fuck me,” she pleaded without shame.

Was there anything headier than taking a woman to the peak of ecstasy, helping her attain that height by firing up all her senses at once?
And,
Colin thought derisively as he
reached up to release her arms
, what made him think he had the fortitude to resist her when he got her to this point?
Taking her shuddering, limp body in his arms, he carried her to a padded bench and gave in to the inevitable as he laid her on it.

“Yes, Olivia,” he ground out against her mouth, “and God help us both for my weakness.” Within seconds he had his cock sheathed in a condom and was thrusting between her spread knees, her pussy like a vise of silk and steel as she clamped around him.

Olivia was glad he left the blindfold on because she didn’t want to see the cool look of indifference he had mastered around her as he fucked her again. The feel of a cock, his cock, filling her again after so long was almost more than she could bear. Her body, already on the teetering edge of climax, accepted his eagerly, her pussy stretching to accommodate him, her slick juices easing his way. Liquid heat consumed her, built with each forceful thrust as she wrapped her legs around his hips and her arms around his shoulders, holding him to her the only way she knew how.

She was disappointed to feel the latex covering his cock, shielding his hard ridges from her hypersensitive flesh as he took her with unrestrained possession. She missed the added intimacy of feeling a bare cock stroking the walls of her vagina, but as the beginning tremors of her climax began, she forgot everything but the pleasure swamping her. Cocooned in darkness and sweeping ecstasy, she clung to the man who had eased her pain and grief and replaced it with pleasure and hope. Infused with pleasure, she whispered, “I love you,” right as the pleasure sent her into a spiraling vortex so intense it wiped her mind of cognizant thought.

Even through the sheer bliss of being inside Olivia again, even with the feel of her pussy clamping around his dick clouding his senses, he had no trouble hearing her breathless declaration. With the desperation of a dying man, he pounded into her until his own release erupted, the pleasure rippling through him so hot it felt like he was burning alive. But all good things must come to an end, and as he slowly withdrew from her still spasming clutches, he knew this good thing had run its course.

“Wait here,” he instructed her tersely as he disposed of the condom then went in search of her clothes.

Olivia sat up shakily, lifted the blindfold and blinked rapidly as her teary eyes came into focus. She didn’t question him when he returned in moments and handed her both her jeans and his shirt.

“Get dressed and I’ll take you home.”

That closed, implacable look told her there would be no arguing, and no going back. She didn’t regret her words, but she did regret the consequences of saying them out loud. She dressed silently, followed him out of the club and down to his truck silently and endured the ride back to her house in silence. But as he walked her inside, did a cursory check to make sure everything was okay then turned to leave without a word, she couldn’t remain silent any longer.

“Did I ruin ‘us’?”

Anger simmering just below the surface, anger at himself for being so susceptible where she was concerned and anger at her for giving him everything he ever wanted from her to add to his regrets, he whirled to face her, the look of utter defeat and confused despair on her face his undoing.

“There is no us, Olivia, never was, never can be. Get that through your head.”

The harshness of his words and look made her take a step back, the wall meeting her back a welcome embrace for the pain lancing through her. There was more going on here than just the feeling of betraying a friend, and even though she wasn’t sure she wanted to know, she heard herself asking anyway.

“Why, Colin? You told me yourself Doug wouldn’t begrudge me moving on. And you want me, I know you do.”

“Want you?” he practically snarled. Pinning her against the wall, his arms braced behind her, caging her in, he glared down at her, unable to stop the words he knew would damn him forever in her eyes. “I’d die for you, I’d kill for you, and it was for those reasons that Doug, my friend and your beloved husband is dead. Didn’t you ever wonder, Livie, why I wasn’t at work that next day, why he was alone on patrol, why his partner wasn’t there to have his back?”

“You were sick. I heard…” she paused, not sure what she had heard after hearing Doug had been killed.

“See, that’s the problem. I lied, I wasn’t sick. I called in sick because I didn’t want to face Doug again after fucking you the night before, didn’t want to play nice and pretend all was well when I wanted you for myself so bad I knew I couldn’t face him the next day and keep my feelings hidden the way I had for a fucking year. Not after being inside you. I was a fucking coward who stayed home and licked my imaginary wounds because my best friend had the girl I wanted. And he died because of that cowardice.”

Colin watched her face pale, her beautiful whiskey eyes widen then fill with despair as the truth sank in. Unable to bear seeing her pain or hearing her scorn, he turned from her and quickly went to the door. “Good bye, Olivia,” he said without turning back around then did the only honorable thing he could think of to do. He walked out of her life for good.

Olivia stood under the pelting hot spray of her shower trying to infuse some warmth into her cold body. Her tears blended with the water cascading down her face as she tried to make sense of what Colin had said. The only thing that had registered at the time was his admission that he had lied, and he thought that lie had contributed to Doug’s death. She remembered the look on his face, the look that told her he’d never forgive himself nor would he ever ask her or expect her to forgive him. And, God help her, she didn’t know if she could. The bond between partners on the force was strong, it had to be to rely on each other, to trust each other to have your back if there was ever a need. Colin and Doug’s bond went even deeper because they were friends before they became partners. And Colin had just admitted he had broken that trust, severed that bond as if he had taken a knife and sliced it.

The water pelted her body, turned as hot as she could tolerate, and every time the spray hit an area still sensitive from the stroke of the flogger, it reawakened her arousal, brought back that delicious sensation that had led to an awesome climax. Or was it the man that had been responsible for that shattering orgasm? She simply didn’t know, but she did know her body still craved the man who had just confessed to an error in judgment that had contributed to her husband’s death and she had no idea how to reconcile the two.

Olivia thought back to the day of Doug’s death, tried to recall what she had been told about his murder, but all she could remember was the crushing grief. She hadn’t asked for details, didn’t think she could handle them at the time, and since then it hadn’t even occurred to her to look into it. The man who shot him, an illegal from Mexico, had been caught a few days later, picked up on another traffic violation, and was now spending the rest of his life in an American prison.
Maybe he knew his record for drug trafficking and arms dealing in Mexico would have kept him from coming here using legal channels
, she
thought,
but now he would spend his new life in her country behind bars.

But, as for the details of the shooting, she had no idea what transpired, if Colin’s presence would have made a difference or not. She knew her husband rarely wore his vest. It had been an ongoing argument with them, and between Doug and Colin, but Doug hated the confining garment, the uncomfortable fit when he was sitting behind the wheel for hours and the added heat that he didn’t need. Now, she thought she could handle hearing exactly what happened, at least she hoped she could, because she knew come Monday, she was going to make some calls to find out. She had to know if Colin, through his neglect of his duties, had contributed to Doug dying that day. The truth would either set Colin free from the demons that haunted him and kept him from her, or it would seal their fate. Since she had nothing left to lose, it was a risk she was willing to take.

By Wednesday, Olivia had a copy of the details surrounding Doug’s shooting as well as a copy of the autopsy report. It had been a good week at work so far, especially since their efforts to get most of the children dismissed and home for the holiday weekend were successful. Only a few, more critical cases would be spending Thanksgiving in the hospital, but all efforts to accommodate them and their families for the next few days were made. Thankfully, there were no terminally ill children at this time, and as Olivia settled on her couch with a cup of hot tea and the reports she had picked up on her way home, she was wondering why she was risking her mellow mood by looking at them.

Maybe she should wait until she returned from spending Thanksgiving in Louisville with her parents and a few other relatives before opening the contents of the folder, contents that could end her relationship with the only man she had ever wanted as much as she had wanted her husband. She had missed Colin this week, missed knowing she could just pick up the phone and call him, missed knowing she would be seeing him at the club this weekend, already missed the feel of his cock inside her, bringing her to heights of ecstasy she had experienced and shared with only one other person. Could she really stand knowing for sure that Colin could have stopped Doug from getting killed simply by being there, having his back as a friend and partner was supposed to do?

As heart wrenching and relationship ending as she knew discovering that to be true would be, there was always the chance that him being there with Doug that day, as he was supposed to be, would have made no difference, that he would not have been able to prevent Doug from being fatally shot, and because there was that chance, she knew she’d never be able to put it to rest until she knew for sure. Opening the folder, she braced herself for the worst as she prayed for the best. An hour later, she lay curled alone in her bed, tears of sadness for the man she had loved mingled with tears of relief for the man she now loved. Now, all that was left to resolve was what to do about the information she had discovered.

Colin slowed Sheba to a canter, then a lope, allowing her to cool down slowly. Another unseasonably warm fall day that did little to thaw the coldness inside him, the long earth pounding ride on Sheba did little to ease his conscience. Unable to return to the club last Saturday night after leaving Olivia’s, he had gone home and spent a sleepless night cursing himself for being a fool and opening his mouth. He knew Brett, Donovan and Mitch were wondering what had happened, questioning why he had asked them to close for him that night after announcing the club wouldn’t be open again until next Saturday. After being shut down the past week, it made poor business sense not to open this week, but he didn’t care. He needed time away from there, time to deal with his latest fuckup, another one that had cost him a relationship he valued as much as that of his brothers, if not more.