The One Year Wisdom for Women Devotional: 365 Devotions through the Proverbs (26 page)

April 4

Fools Show Annoyance

     
A fool shows his annoyance at once,

          
but a prudent man [or woman] overlooks an insult.

Okay, ladies, let’s take this one home. Honestly, do you sometimes make others feel that they have to walk on eggshells when they’re around you? Let me tell you three things that are not excuses: hormones, having a bad day, being in a bad mood. Your kids or friends should never say, “Oh, you know Mom. She’s in one of her moods.” Shame on us.

So let’s press into the second part of our proverb. “But [in contrast] a prudent man [or woman] overlooks an insult.”

First Corinthians 13:5 says, “[Love] is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs” (
NIV
). Easier said than done, yes, but totally worth doing. Let me test you on this. If you are fuming about something—a fight you had with your sister, or someone at work you’re mad at—does the next little annoyance set you off like a bomb? Do you ever just vent at an innocent bystander? The key here is to defuse the bomb.

To defuse the bomb we need to empty the explosives. How do we do that? I know no better place than the foot of the Cross. Have you been cranky, edgy, irritable, short-fused? Believe 1 John 1:9: “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness” (
NKJV
). Kneeling at the Cross, releasing your anger—this defuses the bomb.

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

If you tend to build up steam over matters, will you get in the habit of asking yourself these questions?
Is this really worth fighting over? Is this worth losing sleep over? Is this worth damaging my relationship over? What do I really gain if I win or retaliate?

Conflict is always expensive in wasted time, energy, and emotions. Will you ask the Lord to help you learn to overlook offenses? “A man’s [woman’s] wisdom gives him patience; it is to his glory to overlook an offense” (Proverbs 19:11,
NIV
).

Let’s Pray

Lord, help me to come to you when the steam starts to build. I need your grace—grace for my angry heart, and grace for others too.

One Year Bible Reading

Deuteronomy 26:1–27:26; Luke 10:38–11:13; Psalm 76:1-12; Proverbs 12:15-17

April 5

Slay the Monster

     
Some people make cutting remarks,

          
but the words of the wise bring healing.

Any way you slice it, words can be weapons. Let’s focus on the phrase
cutting remarks
. This can refer to words that cut others down. When do we do that? What is the motive? Why would we ever want to do that? Let me say one word:
jealousy
. Jealousy can seem to Christians an acceptable sin, but you know what, that’s not true. It’s not acceptable to God or anyone. Shakespeare called it the “green-eyed monster.”

It is a monster, and when you engage that monster, never think that the most damage comes to others. This monster cuts you down. And so I would like to ask you to say this with me: “This monster has to die.” If honestly you know you have slandered or criticized harshly, would you ask yourself the question,
Was it because I was jealous?
If so, that monster has to die, because if it doesn’t, it will use you and your words as weapons.

A second motive for “cutting words” is to wound, hurt for hurt. This is another monster, called
revenge
. Confucius said, “Before you embark on a journey of revenge, dig two graves.”

So, my sisters, what is it going to be for us? It’s been said that the greatest revenge is forgiveness—true, deep, sweet, wholehearted forgiveness. This slays the monsters and blesses the Lord. Then turn that forgiveness into words, because “the words of the wise bring healing.”

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

We can’t change the way others live and talk. But we can take the words of Ephesians 4:29-32 to heart and let them be a filter and “high bar” standard for all that we say and why we say it. “Don’t use foul or abusive language. Let everything you say be good and helpful, so that your words will be an encouragement to those who hear them. And do not bring sorrow to God’s Holy Spirit by the way you live. Remember, he has identified you as his own, guaranteeing that you will be saved on the day of redemption. Get rid of all bitterness, rage, anger, harsh words, and slander, as well as all types of malicious behavior. Instead, be kind to each other, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, just as God through Christ has forgiven you.”

One Year Bible Reading

Deuteronomy 28:1-68; Luke 11:14-36; Psalm 77:1-20; Proverbs 12:18

April 6

Promote Peace

     
There is deceit in the hearts of those who plot evil,

          
but joy for those who promote peace.

I feel an urgency to apply this proverb to families. There is so much intrigue and turmoil in families right now. Sisters and brothers are ganging up on each other, fighting over an inheritance, bickering over petty things.

If you’re involved in trouble in your family, I suggest you go back to Genesis 37–50 and read the story of Joseph and his brothers. It’s like a big soap opera, with all the elements of jealousy, bitterness, grudges, lies, deceit. Be aware that it’s not just a story. It’s about a real family—a family with stepmothers and stepbrothers. That adds an element that definitely makes things more complicated, and then you add the element of favoritism, and you have a real formula for trouble. I don’t have to explain that to you if you’re living it. It’s not the Brady Bunch. Bottom line: Joseph’s brothers plotted revenge against Joseph, and in the end, they were the big losers.

First Peter 3:8-9 has a formula of joy for us as an antidote. Read it carefully: “Finally, all of you, live in harmony with one another; be sympathetic, love as brothers, be compassionate and humble. Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing” (
NIV
).

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

Families can indeed be complicated, especially with blended families, ex-spouses, in-laws, and out-laws (ex-in-laws). Everything from who is invited to Easter dinner to custody and inheritance issues can be an emotional can of worms. Let me ask you a question: When there is a conflict in your family, is there a difference between the way you respond and the way the non-Christians respond? Conflict is opportunity in disguise; really it is. It can be the best opportunity of all for you to show the grace and love and patience of Christ. Talk is cheap. This can be your “divine appointment” to walk the talk.

One Year Bible Reading

Deuteronomy 29:1–30:20; Luke 11:37–12:7; Psalm 78:1-31; Proverbs 12:19-20

April 7

Lying Lips

     
Lying lips are an abomination to the L
ORD
,

     
But those who deal truthfully are His delight.

Abomination
. This is pretty strong language. “Lying lips are an abomination to the L
ORD
.”

So what is lying? It’s deception. Even a half-truth is a whole lie. A lie is falsehood, a fraud. It’s used to cover a wrong. A lie is dishonest. It shifts the blame or slants the story. Lying is a bad habit and bad business. God hates it.

Listen to what Jesus said in John 8:44: “[The devil] was a murderer from the beginning, not holding to the truth, for there is no truth in him. When he lies, he speaks his native language; for he’s a liar and the father of lies” (
NIV
).

For us as women, many of the things we struggle with are caused because we have listened to lies. Let me recommend to you a marvelous book by Nancy Leigh DeMoss. It’s called
Lies Women Believe: And the Truth That Sets Them Free
.

This book deals with the trouble it causes women when
we
are
lied to
.

But there is another issue: that is when
we
lie. We sometimes lie to ourselves, we lie to others, and sadly we even try to lie to God. The first step to repentance, be honest that you have been dishonest. Don’t blame anyone else. Then take it to the Cross. It is sin and there is a remedy for sin. With forgiveness, we can hate the lie, because God hates it. And here’s the joy: each time we resist speaking that lie, we can embrace the fact that the Lord delights in a woman who speaks the truth.

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

Lying is indeed bad business. But we as women can sometimes put ourselves in a position to be lied to. We can sit hour after hour in front of the TV set and watch programs that mock morality and truth. Hollywood makes adultery and sex outside of marriage look harmless and normal. Many women watch talk shows that mock goodness and God. Garbage in, garbage out. The media is pushing the limits of false and phony. They call good evil and evil good. Shame on them. But if we endorse their lies by watching it—shame on us.

One Year Bible Reading

Deuteronomy 31:1–32:27; Luke 12:8-34; Psalm 78:32-55; Proverbs 12:21-23