The One Year Wisdom for Women Devotional: 365 Devotions through the Proverbs (30 page)

April 20

Think before Acting

     
A person with good sense is respected;

          
a treacherous person walks a rocky road.

     
Wise people think before they act;

          
fools don’t and even brag about it.

This proverb clearly paints the picture that living foolishly, carelessly, thoughtlessly has hard consequences. It is a bad way to live.

And so today I’d like to talk to moms. Every child is going to make mistakes. They’re going to leap before they look. It’s part of immaturity and inexperience. But if the sympathetic side of you always wants to pad them from the bumps so they never experience the painful consequences of their choices, they gain nothing. In fact, since being careless is easier if they get away with it, it reinforces the weak side of them and trains them to say, “So what?”

But if, while they still live under your roof and while most of their consequences are not “life threatening,” you do let them experience some painful results of their mistakes, the lessons will stick with them much longer. If they realize that the next time they spend their lunch money on a CD, no one’s going to bail them out, it might—no promises, but it just might—make them think. They might learn the old principle, “Don’t do the crime if you can’t do the time.”

So let your daughter spend all her allowance on one expensive pair of jeans, but don’t bail her out when she has no money for tennis shoes or lip gloss. You both will find out no one died, really.

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

Wise people think before they act. It’s our own responsibility to be responsible. No one is going to show up and manage our lives for us. You know the old saying: “Failing to plan is planning to fail.” So, let me challenge you to honestly look at one area that you feel you are not managing well. Have you ever sat down specifically and talked to God about it? I love to sit down with a notepad. In prayer, I ask the Lord questions and ask him to give me a plan. Then—the important part—I quiet my heart to listen. Will you try it? You’ll be pleasantly surprised.

One Year Bible Reading

Joshua 21:1–22:20; Luke 20:1-26; Psalm 89:1-13; Proverbs 13:15-16

April 21

Faithful Messenger

     
A wicked messenger falls into trouble,

     
But a faithful ambassador brings health.

Here we have a formula regarding two kinds of messengers. Of course the one that is rebuked in this proverb is the wicked one. So who is that? Who is a wicked messenger? First of all, a messenger is one who passes along a message about someone or something. And a wicked person is someone guilty of sin against God or man.

So the wicked messenger is someone who
knowingly distorts
information. I will apply this to us women in the body of Christ. As Christians, we’re all held accountable. So I know I have shared this before, but here are five guidelines that can dramatically help us keep our words in check and our message Christ honoring. When we pass along information, especially about others, we need to ask ourselves

• Is it true? Are we sure?
  
• Is it fair? Are we fairly representing someone? Or are we slanting the facts a little to make them look bad, or ourselves good?
  
• Is it kind? Would you want someone to say this about you?
  
• Is it necessary?
  Really?
  Is it necessary that I say this? Some things are better left unsaid.
  
• Here is a big, very insightful, must-ask-yourself question: Do you have any ulterior motive for saying this about someone else?
  

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

The second part of our proverb today lands on a positive note: “But a faithful ambassador brings health.” Let’s commit to using our words today to build up and encourage.

Let’s Pray

Lord, help me be an ambassador for you. Help me to cheer someone up. Help me to shine your light. Is there someone going through a hard time that you can give a helpful, hopeful promise from your Word? Show me how to build up my children in their faith. Give me insight. Show me if they are struggling. Help me be a messenger of your gospel today, telling someone you love them.

One Year Bible Reading

Joshua 22:21–23:16; Luke 20:27-47; Psalm 89:14-37; Proverbs 13:17-19

April 22

Companion of Fools

     
He who walks with the wise grows wise,

          
but a companion of fools suffers harm.

Ladies, never underestimate the importance and power of personal influence. Therefore, women of God, make your choice of inner-circle, close friends very, very carefully.

The warning is, if your friends are foolish, willfully, consistently, unrepentantly foolish, it’s going to rub off on you and cause you trouble.

So what are some foolish patterns that close, even Christian friendships sometimes allow? Let me suggest two areas: compromise and criticize. When you’re with friends, do you ever give each other courage to compromise? What about that chick flick that was funny but trashy? What about books or magazines that you loan to each other or the way that you dress?

Number two: criticism. Do you allow yourselves to gripe to each other? Do you gripe about husbands, kids, family, friends, church, bad habits, bad friendship? Trust me: these things do add up and have bad results.

On the other hand, those who walk with the wise will become wise. Are there some godly women in your church? They might not have time to be buddies with you or disciple you, but if they’re in Bible study and prayer meetings, go be around godly women. If there’s an amazing Sunday school teacher, ask if she needs an assistant. Read Christian biographies. Even in print, wise and wonderful people can influence us with rich, wise insight.

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

Do you have an unhealthy friendship? What do you do—drop that friend? Do you tell her she is a bad influence? Hold on; before you say anything, will you take five days to faithfully pray for her? As you pray, the Lord might show you ways to redirect your relationship. The next step might be to honestly tell your friend that the Lord has convicted you about some of the things you do or have talked about. Then you can invite her to be your prayer partner to pray once a week. If she is a friend who was meant to be, the Lord will prepare her heart beforehand. Instead of losing a bad friend, you both might gain a wise and godly one.

One Year Bible Reading

Joshua 24:1-33; Luke 21:1-28; Psalm 89:38-52; Proverbs 13:20-23

April 23

Dare to Be Diligent

     
He who spares the rod hates his son,

          
but he who loves him is careful to discipline him.

Discipline—what is discipline? The dictionary states that it is “training that develops self-control, character, and orderliness.” So discipline—whether it involves a time-out, or docking of allowance, or staying home from a fun event—has a point. Biblical discipline is not just to punish; it is to train children—to mold and guide from wrong, hurtful patterns so they can learn to make good choices for themselves.

If that is true, why would any parent not want to discipline? Well, I think it’s because it’s hard; it takes discipline on our part.

We moms sometimes feel that little fear that if we don’t give in to our kids’ wishes and whims even when they throw tantrums, they are not going to love us.

Some think kids need their parents to be lenient buddies.
No! No!
Kids need trainers, not enablers. If there is no discipline when they hit their sister or lie to their teacher or steal from the candy counter, they don’t have a negative experience to break them from doing it again. They got away with it. A child that lies to his teacher will later lie to his boss or to his wife.

So moms, discipline, but be careful and prayerful. Ask God to give you the right penalty for that child for that particular offense at that moment. Discipline is not one size fits all.

Make It Personal . . . Live It Out!

Being a mother is complicated. Just when you figure out how to raise your toddlers, they are school age, then teens, and then adults. But there is one thing you can always do for them that they will never grow out of: you can pray. These two books will ignite you to be a prayer warrior for your children:
Every Child Needs a Praying Mom
, by Fern Nichols (founder of Moms in Prayer International, formerly Moms In Touch) and
The Power of a Praying Parent
, by Stormie Omartian. Prayer connects the resources of heaven to our desperate needs here on earth.

Let’s Pray

Lord, give me fresh passion to worry less and pray more for my children, entrusting them to you.

One Year Bible Reading

Judges 1:1–2:9; Luke 21:29–22:13; Psalm 90:1–91:16; Proverbs 13:24-25