The Other Fish in the Sea (31 page)

“Kate honey, we will support you both one hundred percent if having and keeping this baby is what you truly want, but you need to know that it won’t be easy. It will be very,
very
hard…on both of you.”

“We know but, we think we can do it. We have a plan…we’ll still graduate and go to college, it just might take us longer than two people who don’t have a baby at home and that’s okay.”

I’ll admit I was unsure about doing this when I first found out, especially because the day I’d learned I was pregnant, Jeff was being such a jackass later that night…the night of Tristan and Camie’s licorice fiasco. I was afraid he wouldn’t be able to grow up or be able to handle the real responsibility of having a baby and then I would be stuck. But, we went round and round and he insisted he could and would do whatever it takes to be not just a good father but a dependable man, all he needed was the chance to show me. So, over the last couple months, he’s been proving himself.

He’s the one who came up with our “Life Plan” and did all the research to find out how plausible it was, and he collected all the required paperwork we’ll need to implement it too. He suggested opening a joint bank account and little by little, he’s been moving money over to it so I can have access to funds just in case something happens to him before we’re married. He was the one who wanted all the books and that calendar, and then he used what he read to grill my doctor at my first appointment, and it should go without saying, but he’s been at every single appointment since then as well. He also quit ditching school and is taking his grades seriously now and even though I think it was hard for him in the beginning, he also voluntarily quit smoking pot and drinking. The only reason he drinks at all now is because I told him he should. I think it would’ve been way too suspect if he’d just all of a sudden quit being the “Jeff” everyone knows him to be, you know? But even so, he only does it when we’re around our peers at certain parties or like we were at the desert and still, all he’ll have is maybe one or two drinks. Plus, he spaces them out so he doesn’t get drunk.

And now because of all that, I have not one single doubt in my mind that Jeff and I can handle being teen parents. We’re not in the majority…we have a lot going for us that most in our situation don’t, so we count ourselves blessed and don’t plan on taking anything for granted.

“Alright, so exactly how far along are you?” My mom asked with an accepting nod of her head.

“I’ll be thirteen weeks on Monday.” Wow, I’m only two days away from officially being in the second trimester…it’s gone so quickly.

“We have thumbs now!” Jeff added, sounding so excited and proud. He’s already head over heels in love with our little peanut. That’s what he calls the baby…Peanut.

“Any movement yet?” Grey asked, smiling at his son’s use of “we.”

“Actually, yeah…right now as a matter of fact.” Jeff was instantly on his knees with his head and hands all over my tummy trying to feel the popcorn going off inside. “Babe, I think it’s still too early for you to be able to feel anything,” I said, giggling at him.

It’s pretty early for even me to be feeling anything, but last week when I asked about the movement I thought I’d been feeling, my obstetrician told me that it
is
possible. He explained that every woman and each pregnancy is different, and with me being so thin to begin with and all the weight I’ve lost over the last weeks with a raging case of morning sickness which is now, thankfully, abating, it wouldn’t be terribly surprising for me to feel my baby moving earlier than what is typical.

“I know, but I can still try, right? Come on, Peanut, kick Mommy
real
hard for Daddy…” I rolled my eyes, but grinned too.

Grey had joined Jeff on the floor in front of my stomach so my mom and I continued to talk over their heads, like we hadn’t just had every parent’s worst nightmare conversation come true. To me she seemed a little sad, but I knew it wasn’t for me…she was feeling the loss of long ago. I almost feel bad not having come to her with this before now, but Jeff and I decided together to not say anything to anyone until we were well past the “twelve week danger period” and since Camie’s mom guessed and asked a few weeks ago, he and I don’t count that as having “told” anyone.

“I agree with you, you know…I believe you can do this, but I think you should talk with Trinity about what it’s like to
really
be pregnant and married in high school.”

Actually, I had the exact same thought this morning and already asked Tristan’s mom to pencil me in for dinner one night this week…

15.

Second Chances, First Times, & Acid Washed Jeans

I was really surprised to learn that my shopping excursion with Kate was still on for Sunday. I was thinking after everything that happened the last few weeks and more so on Friday night, and then not even hearing from her for most of Saturday, that she probably wouldn’t be up for an afternoon of shopping frivolity set to annoying, trite and overplayed Christmas music downtown. She’s even decided against having a birthday party this year because there’s just so much crap going on in her life right now. I mean, her birthday
is
the day after Christmas and all, so finding a good day to have a party is tricky every year, but still, I think opting out of celebrating your birth says something.
 

So anyway, when she sent me a text Saturday night confirming our plans and saying she would enlighten me on her and Jeff’s parental confrontation, I was vastly relieved. As things stood the last time I saw either of them before they left Tristan’s, well, let’s just say I was pretty worried about my best friend’s and her boyfriend’s combined mental health. My relief was doubled when she picked Jillian and me up and seemed almost like her old self…spunky
and
chipper to boot.

“Oh my God, Kate! I can’t
believe
your guys’ grandparents did all of that! I mean they
actually
coerced your mom into having an abortion and stole her mail so Grey had no idea your mom still wanted to be with him?”

We were having lunch before our shopping feeding frenzy on Horton Plaza and Kate had just finished telling Jillian and me how her mom and Jeff’s dad were in love back in high school, but their parents didn’t approve and forcibly came between them, resorting to cruel tactics to make the two believe the other didn’t want to have anything to do with the one after sending Valerie, Kate’s mom, on such an enormous guilt trip that she chose to end her pregnancy. From what she told us, Grey was absolutely heartbroken when he found out and it clouded his judgment. He thought Valerie didn’t really love him and his parents encouraged that thinking so he left for the minors with just their word and without hearing it from her lips. Then Valerie’s parents destroyed every letter Grey wrote to her and did the same with all of her letters written to him so they both thought they were being ignored. Seriously, the whole story is just gut wrenching to hear, I can’t even imagine what it must’ve been like to live it.

“Yeah, they did. Seriously, you guys, it was almost exactly like that movie with Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams… God, what was the name of that?”

“‘The Notebook.’ It was a novel before it was a movie,” Jillian threw out before I could supply Kate with the answer. She and I both have read it, however, Ryan Gosling is on my island so I of course prefer the movie, even though I bawl like a freaking baby every damned time I watch it.

“Oh! That’s right, ‘The Notebook’…so yeah, it was almost just like that except Allie wasn’t talked into having an abortion by both sets of parents and it took my mom and Grey over twenty years to discover the truth.”

“So um, if they loved each other so much, why didn’t they get back together when Grey moved back to town? I mean, I know your mom was married, but you would
think
they would’ve hooked up maybe once, you know what I mean?” I’m such a sucker for true love never dies kinds of stories and I would hope that if my true love and I were ever separated by nefarious,
or
innocent means, that we would find our way back to each other, you know? I mean, that
is
kind of what happened in the movie.

“Yeah you would think, but remember, they were both under the false impression that they were over each other and they both put on an act to protect their hearts from being broken a second time. When Grey agreed to that blind date with Laura (that’s Jeff’s mom), my mom was crushed and it got even worse when he got Laura pregnant and she was going to have his baby…it was like the baby
they
should’ve had together. Plus, even though Laura had died, my mom’s best friend had just had a baby too and I think she was feeling, I dunno…like an outsider, so that’s when my mom decided to have a baby of her own and got me. She thought having a baby would fill the empty spots but I only filled one of them.

“She tried to act like none of it ever bothered her but, it ate away at her until she just couldn’t be around Grey anymore. She and my dad still went out with Tristan’s parents and they babysat me and Jeff together all the time, but really, a little while after I was born, she tried her best to cut Grey out of her life. She never really loved my dad but she tried to be a good wife. A fat lot of good
that
did her…lying, cheating, son of a bitch…

“Anyway, I guess she and Grey had one conversation about three or four years ago but they didn’t talk about them, they talked about Jeff and me. They saw how we felt about each other and agreed to stand back and let things play out. They made a conscious choice to not stand in our way because of what happened to them. So, back on your second day of school when I told you my parents were clueless? Yeah, not so much. My mom totally knew what I was doing and aside from having the um…safe sex talk with me, she never said a word to me or my dad about it. And Grey wasn’t being a negligent father…he was just standing back like they’d agreed to do.” When Kate finished her parental exposé I saw the telltale sparkle of tears beginning to well in her eyes, but, they never fell.

“I’m kind of surprised Tristan’s mom and dad never said anything to any of you guys about the history between your mom and Grey…” Now that I think about it, that is really odd. Tristan’s parents don’t really keep things from their son. Not from what I’ve seen and been told anyway.
 

“Well, Jeff asked about that too, and it was because my mom specifically asked them to keep quiet. My dad didn’t know about Grey either. When he came back to town she was afraid telling my dad would be uncomfortable at best and again, Tristan’s parents didn’t know they still loved each other.

“They knew my mom and Grey weren’t necessarily happy but they didn’t know about what our grandparents did to keep them apart and thought my mom and Grey had, in fact, moved on. By keeping quiet they thought they were respecting the wish of their friend and doing what she thought was the right thing for her marriage. I mean, the whole thing is so mind-boggling dramatic and convoluted…especially when you throw in my dad’s affair with Laura. I mean Christ, I bet Jerry Springer would give his right arm to have this story on his show!”

No kidding, even though the show has totally jumped the shark. It sucks without Steve the Bodyguard too. Also, I’m still wondering how Kate’s mom even found out about all the cheating and the affair with Jeff’s mom, but I’m assuming it came out during one of her mom’s and dad’s fights. Since she hasn’t gone into detail about that though, she might not even know herself yet, but even if she does, I’m not going to pry. Kate has had way too much Steve-less Springer drama to deal with as it is.

“Yeah, but now they get a second chance at love and life together, right? I mean, it’s completely disturbing how it all started but in a way, it’s romantic, you know? Being reunited after twenty-some-odd years and all of that?”

Oh, I feel like I should mention that Grey never cheated on Denise. When Valerie called him that night (she was “Honey” in case you haven’t figured that out on your own), he decided to break up with Denise a few days later after he’d talked to Valerie again and she’d told him more about what was going on. Grey just didn’t tell Jeff about any of that, not until now anyway. Again, I’m not sure why he didn’t, but whatever.

“It really kind of is... They’re up in La Costa for the weekend. Jeff and I were pretty upset yesterday morning but the more we talked to them, it was like looking in a mirror and listening to him and me talk about each other and we just can’t be petty about our parents wanting to be together…even if we
do
become known as the most inbred family on the West coast.”
 

I would’ve missed my sister wink at Kate just then, but a seagull was causing a commotion in the air with a couple of pigeons over a French fry behind where Jill was sitting so I happened to be looking in her direction when she did it. It made me wonder just how much Jillian saw in that house Friday night.

We finished lunch and then proceeded to make our last-ditch attack on the stores before Christmas. Jillian left Kate and me to go do her own thing and actually, I didn’t have all that much to get. I knew what I wanted to pick up for Tristan and where to get it, and it just so happened that Hot Topic is where I found a few things for Jillian as well. I also picked up a book for her, primarily because I want to read it, but I know she’ll enjoy it and then pass it along to me so it’s a win-win. Oh, I also found these really great purpley-pink acid washed jeans with ankle zippers at the Guess store that I really want for my ‘80s theme costume party (I
am
celebrating my birth, damn it!), but Kate refused to let me buy them, calling them the worst fashion revival since bellbottoms and Birkenstocks. I’ll have to come back for them when she’s not around, though, because I think they’re “rad.”

The three of us were walking back to Kate’s car when Jill, who
loves
presents, asked me in an overly innocent way, “Hey Cami
eee
? What’s in the Hot Topic b
aaa
g?”

“Handcuffs,” I answered honestly. Of course, I did omit the little, red pleather, fingerless gloves, the bullet belt and the retro, leopard print sunglasses that are, in fact, for her.