The Persistence of Memories - A Novel of the Mendaihu Universe (46 page)

“I made it,” Amna whispered, impressed not
only with herself but with Denni’s apparent ease at travel. She
pushed herself off the sill, regarding her body for a second as she
adjusted to the different reality. She held out her arms, rolling
them back and forth, glancing down at her chest, her frame, her
legs...and letting out a small laugh. “Look at me. I look just like
my mom! And you! You’re beautiful, Den! I’m so jealous!”

“Welcome to my sehna lumia, Amna,” Denni
said. “You are welcome here anytime.” She reached out and took
Amna's hand. “Check it out, I've got a back yard.” Together they
stepped out of the gazebo and onto the lawn. It seemed bigger this
time, stretching farther away from her little house and wider on
each side. She looked to her right, half expecting to see Kindeiya
Shalei there, but saw no one. She didn't hear any voices this time.
Perhaps her subconscious had already readjusted itself and felt
even safer than before.

“This is beautiful,” Amna whispered, eyes
wide, spinning in amazement at their surroundings. Denni sensed a
very brief wave of fear from her, but it quickly changed to
excitement. “So this is where you went that first time?” she
asked.

Denni nodded. “It’s become one of my lumisha
dea.”

Amna side eyed her. “All the way out
here?”

“Sure, why not?”

Amna giggled. “It's a bit out of the way,
isn't it?”

“Not if you know the route.”

“Which you apparently do,” she said, not
without a hint of pride. “That took no time at all. I wish I had
your strength.” She glanced around again, taking everything in. “It
certainly fits your standards. I definitely see you living
here.”

Denni flashed a smile at her. She would live
here, if she could.

Or perhaps she had already? She craned her
head towards the tree line at the far end of the field. A sensation
washed over her...a long ago memory of walking barefoot, grass
knee-high and the color of cypress...

She froze.
I
have
lived here
before.

...the wisps of thin clouds from the west,
trying in a vain attempt to block out the sun...coming to the edge
of the field now, a slight incline, grass shoots giving way to
shorter scrub giving way to a fine layer of dirt and moss and
rusted needle...standing at the edge now, turning to see the
gazebo, which stands before a large stone house almost completely
covered in ivy...seeing someone in that gazebo, a woman of fair
height and build, distracted by her own surroundings and holding
herself close as she paces the stone floor...

...the woman who knows identities and
secrets...

...through the wood and down a well-worn path
with the sound of a burbling stream just ahead...opening now into
another line of trees, of weeping willows, their sad and drooping
arms sheltering small birds and animals, filtering the sunlight and
cooling the breeze to a slight shiver...

...standing in front of herself...looking
down on a much younger version of herself, a precious child of
five, playing with fern leaves and twisting them into necklaces and
bracelets and crowns...watching as she reaches with her own hand
and touches this little girl on the head, stroking her fine hair,
knowing full well that she is looking at herself and is proud of
what she has become in her young life, and knowing where it will
all lead...

...this little girl looks up at her older
self, and smiles.

Somfei fadin,
she says.

...the girl is
not
her, but a girl she
knows...she is a girl she
will
know some time in the
future...she is the future One of All Sacred, the one to come after
her...she knows who she is...she is her daughter in some possible
future, a beautiful girl of five, with fiery red hair twisting and
knotting in the slight breeze...

...she is Annedin Shalei si Oktanis, daughter
of Denysia Shalei and....

...and?

No…it can’t be!

Eyes opened, and she was back in the present.
Amna stood close, watching, arms held up before her, hesitantly,
almost afraid to touch. “Den?” she whispered. “Are you all
right?”

“Oh...” she managed, shuddering.

“Denni?”

“Goddess...” Her twitching hand covered her
mouth. She was shivering with emotion, unable to let go of this
vision. She took another uneven breath and bit her lower lip
hard.

Amna...
she managed from within.
Oh...what I've just seen...

“What...? What did you just see?” She moved
ever closer. The hand still hovering in the air, Amna hesitated one
last time, glancing at her own twitching fingers.
Please…
she said within.
Tell me what you see.
She dropped her hand
onto Denni’s shoulder, so weak and light and —

“I...” Denni exhaled. A violent shudder raced
through her whole body as she stared into the woods in front of
her. Strength drained out of her and she fell to her knees, arms at
her sides and palms outward. Multiple emotions washed over her in
waves, yet the only one to remain was utter fear. Fear of this
future, fear of its inevitability, fear of what could ultimately
bring her here, to raise a child so far away from Earth and hand
over such a heraldic title as the One of All Sacred like it was
just a name...

Fear of the truth.

Oktanis,
she whispered.
I know who
he is, Amna!

Again, the image of a young daughter in the
field, standing next to her oblivious to the chaos surrounding her.
This was not Denni. This was
not
her future. A possible one,
and one that could be prevented. This field, this sehna lumia of
hers was a pacifist's dream, a paradise, an Eden...
her
Eden...could she possibly turn her back on Earth, on
Gharra
,
for the sake of her own safety? Was there any question that she
would eventually give up Earth for Annedin?

It was a question she did not want to answer.
The mere possibility! She took a deep breath, then another, until
she had calmed down enough to regain her senses. If she was to take
responsibility for any of these actions, she certainly did not want
to make a hasty, emotional choice that could bring disastrous
results.

Annedin...
she thought, and hoped that
Amna could not hear or sense her right now.
Please, madin...know
that I would love you as my daughter. But I can't sacrifice my
homeworld for your safety.

“D-d…D-deh—”

Denni shuddered and opened her eyes again.
Amna stood above her, twitching and wavering. Her eyes were vacant
and drifting. She stuttered and coughed out incomprehensible
sounds, her breathing shallow. “Amzi?” she said, her own voice
barely a whisper. “Amzi…are you— ”

Amna’s head lolled and rolled to the right
and down, until her eyes locked onto hers.

They were nearly all black with an intention
of fire behind them.

“D-deh…Deh…”

“Amzi!” She could not look away.

Then Amna fell to her knees beside her, arms
splayed outwards, her hands facing upwards, barely making fists.
Behind each jagged breath was a faint growl now, a
primal
defensive rumbling from within, so deep Denni felt it within her
own soul. Her nostrils flared as she breathed heavily and
forcefully. Denni cautiously and fearfully reached out a weak hand
and touched her friend on the shoulder, but Amna batted her arm
away with a shockingly violent backhand and scrambled backwards,
well out of her reach. Still shivering, Amna slowly lifted her head
in Denni's direction. Amna’s eyes were wide and completely black,
burning into her own with a malice she’d never seen in her
life.

“D— Deh—” Amna uttered.

Amna!
Denni cried from within.
Amna! What's wrong?

“Y—you...” Her voice was unnaturally low,
almost a rumble. “D—Dennyssssia.....” she hissed. “Y...you arrre
Onnnne....”

I am the One of All Sacred,
she
admitted. There was no pride to that statement just then.

Amna twitched her head violently, hair
whipping everywhere. She let out another long, phlegmy breath.
“Y...you sssssavvvvv— ”

Denni tried as hard as she could to stay
calm. This was her best friend, her Protector…she could not run
away. “Amzi…? Who do I save?”

“You sssav.....sssssavvyr....of....” Amna
stopped. Her breath was slow. So incredibly, dangerously slow.
Denni shivered again at the intensity of that stare, the ferocity
behind it. She could not read it at all. Was she angry?
Terrified?

“Savior...of?” Denni said, her voice just
above a whisper.

“K-kkk-rssnnnnnndaahhhhhhh....”

Denni stared at her. Krisanda? Who was —

She gasped.

Savior of Trisanda.

“Wh....what?” she managed.

“D-Dennn. S’me,” the girl muttered, her eyes
never leaving her. Slowly, she lifted up a hand…not to reach out,
but to show her an empty upturned palm. She was letting her know
she would not lash out. “Ahm. Ah. M’nah. Puh. Please.”

“A—Amna?” She resisted the temptation to
reach out and grasp at her, pull her out of this strange trance
that seemed to be sustaining her and killing her at the same time.
“Amna, can you hear me?” she called out. “I'm going to take your
hand. Don't worry, I won't hurt you. I'm going to bring you closer
to the center of the field. Do you understand?”

Amna, still shivering and breathing heavily,
stared back at her with those intense eyes, nearly lost in her own
world. Denni recognized a flash of cognizance, however — an attempt
at a smile, a quick lift of the corner of her mouth, dropping away
a second later — and nodded. Slowly, she lifted up her own
trembling hand and grasped at hers. Amna’s skin was frighteningly
cold. The girl winced and cried and shook her hand as if wanting to
pull herself loose, but knew better and forced herself to follow.
She pushed herself up to a halfway erect position, daring not to
stand any higher.

“Come on, Amzi...come on,” she pleaded
quietly and started to walk back, one painfully slow step after
another. “Almost there...that's right.” She turned to face the
gazebo, and nearly stopped again. They had already crossed the
entire field of grass and were standing at the tree line, and the
distance they had crossed wasn't nearly as far as what she'd seen
when they'd arrived here. Out of nowhere a saying that Caren had
once uttered came to mind:
everything is relative.
Space and
time here were relative, and she was rapidly losing control of
that. She soldiered on towards the gazebo as quickly as she
could.

Amna began to cry, first whimpers of sorrow,
then wails of pain as she began pulling at Denni's hand again,
begging, pleading to let go. The wailing bordered on the howling of
a wolf, high and full of agony. Amna's hand was still unnaturally
cold in hers, despite Denni's warm hands feeding her heat...

Heat,
she thought.
Goddess...I must
be scalding her.

They had crossed over half the field by the
time Denni finally let go of her hand. With a final piercing wail,
Amna grabbed at the wrist, holding it close to her and sobbing as
she fell again to her knees. Denni's heart sank and she crouched
down, watching her but not daring to reach out again. Perhaps just
her being there was consolation enough. Amna lifted her chin
quickly and stared at Denni as if to say
don't worry, I'll be
fine
, and lowered herself to the ground. She extended her
injured hand and placed it palm down on the grass, and closed her
eyes. She whispered a word or two in a peculiar form of Anjshé that
Denni did not understand, and exhaled once more before slowly
lifting her head up again. She looked straight at her, this time in
a gesture of reverence.

“Denysia,” she breathed, her voice no longer
a rumble. It was human, but so much lower than her normal tone. It
resonated so perfectly with Denni’s own spirit she felt her heart
leap. “I'm sorry, I should have warned you. I didn't expect this to
happen so quickly.”

“Amzi?” she said, her own voice a pitiful
croak. “What happened?”

“Denysia, it's me. You’ve awakened me. It's
Annedin, your daughter.”

Denni stared at her for a very long time
before she could possibly say anything.

Annedin?

“I am fine, Denysia. I am truly well now.
This is my True Self,” Amna/Annedin said, answering her unspoken
question. “Bringing me here to your sehna lumia, inviting me in,
talking to me as your daughter, you have awakened
me
, as
Annedin.”

“You...” Denni stared at her. “You...weren't
affected by Nehalé Usarai's Awakening ritual?”

The young woman smiled at her. “Of course I
was. It was the reason why I stuck by you and Karinna so loyally
during that time. I didn't fully understand
why
, except that
I felt compelled to. Now I know. I'm your daughter, Denysia...” She
began to giggle, the instantly recognizable Mannaki levity of
Amna's sneaking in. “I know...doesn't make much sense, does it?
Especially since on Gharra, I'm older than you by two weeks.”

“How? I mean…” Denni was suddenly aware that
she had tensed up, her entire body rigid. She forced herself to
relax and started again. “Does this have to do with the Rain of
Light?”

She shrugged. “Yes and no. Spiritually, I'm
much,
much
younger than you. You, as both the spirit of
Denysia Shalei and the One of All Sacred, are old enough to be my
mom.”

That
had to be Amna's wit slipping
through. Denni let out a snort of a laugh. “Maybe I am. You scared
the hell out of me, you know.”

“You're wondering why you were burning my
hand.”

Denni nodded. “The thought had occurred to
me.”

Her friend bowed her head, not quite hiding a
mischievous grin. “Would you like to see the true Annedin, or the
human side that you see now?”