The Price of Love (Rockin' Country Book 2) (15 page)

The tears that Hannah had tried to hold at bay spilled over her eyes and down her cheeks. She wanted to say so many things, but he had gotten on a roll and she couldn’t interrupt.

“You are a crazy fucking woman if you don’t think I’m not affected by you not being here, and to be perfectly honest with you, that pisses me off, hurts my feelings, and pisses me off.”

“You already said that pisses you off,” she whispered, taken back by the way his green eyes flashed at her.

“Don’t you dare be a smartass with me. I’m mad now, furious, that you discounted my feelings, and you think you have the monopoly on being sad, lonely, and depressed. I may not have the lady parts to have PMS, but I guarantee you my mood now matches yours. Congratulations, love of my life.”

She couldn’t get a word in edgewise.

He growled in frustration. “This is not the type of shit I need from you. What I need is for you to be the understanding wife who can’t wait to see me. Not give me a fucking guilt trip because we can’t be in the same time zone.”

“I can’t wait to see you,” she whispered.

Reaper was on, and Garrett had taken a backseat. “You’re a spoiled little brat if you want to act like you’re the only one hurting here, and I don’t want to hear about it anymore. Have a good fucking day, sweetheart.” He disconnected the call.

She was left holding the phone, her mouth hanging open in shock. There was a knock at the door and Shell opened it without hesitation.

“Was that Garrett I heard yelling in here?”

For a moment Hannah didn’t say anything, still looking at the phone, thinking she would see him try to reconnect their FaceTime. When it became apparent that he wasn’t going to do that, she lowered the phone to her lap and looked at her friend. “Yeah,” she nodded before bursting into tears.

“Did you two have a fight?” Shell asked, climbing onto the bed next to her and hugging her close.

“I’m not sure what that was.” She shook her head. Once she had her emotions somewhat under control, she explained to Shell what had happened.

“I can’t believe I’m defending him, but you’re both very stressed, and sometimes we snap at the people we love the most. You know he’s got a hair trigger sometimes. Did you deserve it? Probably not, but we both knew it was coming.”

“No.” Hannah shook her head. “I didn’t know it was coming.”

“Well, I did. Jared told me that Garrett’s been an ass to be around the past few days. He misses you, and he’s having a hard time dealing with it.”

“This is stupid.” Hannah ran her hand through her hair. “Why can’t we be normal? Why do we have to go through this separation, and then why in the world do we have to get annoyed with and yell at each other?”

“You’re newlyweds, Han. Most newlyweds fight just to make up. I have a feeling that’s what you two are doing. The only bad thing for you? He’s too far away for makeup sex,” she giggled.

Hannah groaned. “Five more weeks. I can handle five more weeks, right?”

In her own head, Shell wondered if she could handle five more weeks with her friend. Hannah and Garrett were going to drive her insane before this was all over. Instead of voicing that, she nodded her head. “You got this.”

“I got this,” Hannah repeated, but knew she didn’t have it at all.

*  *  *

“F
ucking crazy-ass females.” Garrett slammed his phone against his thigh.

“What’s wrong?” Jared asked. They were still in the studio, trying to finish up the song they were working on. Everyone else had left for the night. Out of the entire group, he and Jared were the most dedicated and they all knew it.

“Did you catch the end of that?”

“Kind of, I tried to give you your privacy, but I couldn’t help but hear. You did have her on FaceTime.”

“Was I harsh?” he asked, needing to feel justification for his feelings, and if anyone could give it to him straight, it was Jared.

“You’re always harsh when you care. That’s the thing, you have no filter, and sometimes that’s hard for people to take. Especially when people aren’t used to that side of you. Even though she’s your wife, she’s not used to that side of you. With her, you still have to watch yourself.”

There were some things he couldn’t let go, and he knew that about himself. Her seriously questioning whether he missed her or not was one of those things. It wasn’t like they were in a contest over who missed each other the most, but his feelings still mattered. “I’m sick of her acting like I don’t give a shit.”

“Do you wonder if that’s a mechanism? Ever?” Jared asked quietly.

“No, and I really don’t give a fuck. If she can’t figure out that I give a shit after everything we’ve been through, then what am I fighting so hard for?”

“I want you to hear me out.”

Garrett wasn’t sure that he wanted to do that. Jared was the king at making excuses, and Garrett was more than sure he could do it for Hannah too. What he wanted to do more than anything in this moment was to shut down and not give a fuck. It didn’t hurt when he didn’t give a fuck.

“I’m going to take you not saying anything as it being okay for me to speak. As someone who has a lot of the same personality traits as she does, I can tell you that acting like someone doesn’t care is an easy way of making it not hurt so much. If you believe that someone doesn’t care, then it doesn’t mean anything. Remember all those times I told you that I didn’t have your perfect life, so there was no way you’d understand what I was going through? It made it easier to pretend you didn’t understand.”

“But I’m so damn sick of proving I do understand, that I do miss her.”

“And I’m sure she’s sick of hearing you lose your cool. These are two things that the two of you are going to have to work on. You’re newlyweds who got married months after meeting each other. These are personality quirks. Quirks that you will learn to work around. I’m not saying you should be the one to apologize, but I’m saying that the two of you need to come to some sort of understanding,” Jared offered, taking a drink from the bottle of water he now carried with him everywhere.

“It’s hard to do that when we have no time to spend together.”

“And there lies the problem.” Jared looked at him pointedly. “She’s killing herself to give you two this time.”

“It’s not my fault,” Garrett cut him off.

“No, it’s not, but at the same time, you need to think of how tired, stressed, and sick of running around she is. They are demanding a lot from her, and so are you.”

Garrett ran his hands through his hair, pulling on the ends of it. “I don’t know what to do, I’m not the one who’s going to apologize all the fucking time, I’m not.”

“It’s not about the apology, it’s about the understanding.”

Jared got up and walked out of the studio. He had done what he thought was right, and that was all he could do.

*     *     *

It was going on forty-eight hours since she and Garrett had spoken to one another. As much as she hated to admit it, she had spent her day off in her bed, watching chick flicks and drinking Starbucks. That pissed her off more than she cared to tell anyone, but he had been right, it was exactly what she needed. Now she wasn’t sure how to approach him, to tell him that she was sorry and she shouldn’t have flown off the handle when they talked. She should have been as supportive to him as he was to her, and her emotions and hormones had gotten the better of her. It wasn’t very often in her world that she had to make amends. She glanced at her cell phone; she had two hours before she had to start getting ready for her show. Grabbing her laptop, she pulled it over to where she sat.

“What’s going on?” Shell asked as she walked into the room and had a seat in the chair that sat next to Hannah.

“Looking for something to give to Garrett. An ‘I’m sorry’ gift.”

“What do you get for the guy who has everything?” Shell asked, as she scrolled through texts on her phone.

“I know, right? He has anything he could ever want, and I’m not sure what I could get him that he doesn’t have, but I’ve got to find something.” She started searching random things and blew her hair out of her face as she came up with absolutely nothing.

“What do you love about him?” Shell asked.

“Everything,” Hannah answered without hesitation.

“No, like, make a list. That way we can see what we can buy.”

Hannah started marking off things. “I love his tattoos, his good heart, the fact that he has to wear prescription glasses and it’s all a part of his
him
. I love all of that.”

Shell snapped her fingers, an idea popping into her head. “What about earrings? He’s worn the same pair since we met him.”

“That’s an awesome idea.” Hannah sat up straighter in her chair. “The only problem is his ears aren’t normal. They’re gauged or something like that.”

“Let me text Jared,” she said, as she grabbed her phone and began typing a message to her boyfriend.

“Tell him not to say anything,” Hannah warned.

“Trust me; our secret is safe with Jared.”

An hour later, she had picked out a pair, and thanks to some quick talking from Shell, who was much more assertive, the earrings were being delivered that afternoon to the studio, where Jared assured her they would be.

“Thanks for helping me,” Hannah told her as she sat down in her makeup chair and started applying products. A lot of singers had professionals that helped, but she preferred to do her own makeup, always had.

“You’re welcome. I know you’ve been stressed and tired and you miss him. If I can make anything easier for you, then I want to. Sometimes it’s hard for me to know what to do to make things easier for you. I try, but it can be difficult.”

“It’s because I don’t want people to think I can’t do things on my own. When I met Garrett and he started pointing out how much you do for me, it made me realize how much I had come to count on you doing everything for me. That wasn’t fair for you. It wasn’t even fair to me, because then it was like I couldn’t be an adult. Now I’m struggling with asking for help. Am I going to become that dependent person again? I’m overwhelmed, but I can’t tell if it’s because I have a ton going on or if it’s because I’m a brat like Garrett said,” she laughed. The first time she’d laughed in days.

“He wasn’t wrong about anything he said; I can be honest enough with you to tell you that. At the same time, all of us can be the same way. All of us have periods of time when we’re just flat-out bitches, and he caught you at a bad time; apparently you caught him at a bad time too. At some point, one of you is going to have to call the other one,” Shell told her. “I can’t believe it’s been two days.”

“I think it’s the principle that neither one of us wants to give in.”

“Someone is going to have to.”

Hannah made a non-committal sound as she finished her makeup and called for hair.

*     *     *

Thirty minutes before show time was always a nervous time for Hannah. She would sit backstage and go through the set list, make sure her voice was good to go, and drink a coffee or energy drink to make sure she was ready. On this night, she couldn’t think of any of that, all she could think of was the fact that she and Garrett still hadn’t spoken to each other. It wasn’t that she hadn’t wanted to call him, she didn’t mind being the one to make the move, but she was afraid that he wouldn’t pick up the phone, and she wasn’t sure that her confidence could take that yet.