The Price of Love (Rockin' Country Book 2) (5 page)

“You want a break?” Stacey could hear the frustration from Hannah, and to a point, she could understand it. She felt this way with Brad sometimes—the band and his career would always come first. Their lives would always be expected to come second.

“I do,” her voice was strong. “I’ve never really taken one. It’s always been a few weeks here, a few weeks there, maybe a month. I’ve gone from tour to record and back three times since I turned eighteen. I’ve not had more than a month off in almost seven years. I need a break.”

“What will Shell say about that?”

“I’m not sure, but going to rehab for an eating disorder was the only freakin’ long-term vacation I’ve had. That’s sad.”

Stacey had to agree with her. Someone with her star power, who had sold millions of records, should be able to get a vacation. “You need to have your lawyer read through your contract; there should be some clause in there that says you get time off. Garrett and the guys have taken a year off at three different points that I know of.”

Hannah bit her lip as she rolled that over in her head. What would the record company say if she did find the clause and she exerted her power? She was like any other human being in the world. She was feeling tired and used up; she’d been feeling it more and more lately. Another part of her wondered if they would let her do it. She had one more song to record, and then the record would be done. A boatload of money had already been spent on this, and she had a feeling they wouldn’t let her walk away from it.

“Thanks, Stace, you’ve given me a lot to think about.”

“Sometimes it takes someone who’s not in the situation to see it clearly.”

Truer words had never been spoken. A lot of the time, she and Garrett had such strong feelings about who was right and who was wrong, they argued over the stupidest of things. Wanting to deflect that attention, Hannah pulled into the parking lot of the boutique, grateful that this was the day of the week they were open late. “How did Garrett sound?”

“He was pissed at first—you know that his temper starts out hot. Then, as we talked more, he sounded sad. He misses you.”

“I miss him too. We could have picked a better time to get married. Our lives are so crazy.”

Stacey laughed. “The first day I met you, I knew that Garrett would marry you. You ground him in a way nobody else can, but at the same time, you’re a trigger for him. All it takes is someone saying one thing about you that he doesn’t like and he flies off the handle or comes to the wrong conclusion. It hurt him a lot that they want you to do a love song with someone who’s more your type.”

“Is that what he said?” Hannah was shocked those words had come out of his mouth. “Someone more my type? I’ve never heard anything more ridiculous in my life. There is nobody in this world more my type than him. I didn’t know it when I first met him, but now, without a shadow of a doubt, I know it.”

“You make him insecure in a lot of areas I’ve never heard him be insecure about before. When you aren’t with him, his mind wanders.” Stacey knew that she shouldn’t be telling her sister-in-law these things, but Hannah needed to know. She needed to know that it wasn’t one-sided—the fear that this could all go away tomorrow. It was very much felt on both sides.

Garrett’s insecurities were completely stupid, and Hannah knew she was going to have to have a talk with him. There was no reason in this world for him to believe that he needed to be insecure over them. “Okay, I’ll talk to him. I’m gonna let you go,” she told her sister-in-law.

“Alright, if you need anything else, give me a call!”

“Love you,” Hannah told her. “Thank you for listening to me.”

“Love you too. Come visit soon!”

They hung up, leaving Hannah to stew. She knew exactly what she needed to do and she knew exactly who she needed to contact. It was time to go over Shell’s head. With a sigh, she dialed the number for her lawyer.

*     *     *

“What the hell, Hannah?”

Shell came storming into the house that the two of them shared, waving a paper around, later in the afternoon.

Hannah had been mentally preparing for this since she’d gone to her lawyer’s office. “Exerting some of the clauses in my contract and my authority.”

“There was a time when we would have talked about this,” Shell fumed from where she stood.

“I tried to talk to you about it, but you shot me down. The only duet I’m going to be singing is going to be with my husband. It’s up to the record company now, if they want to ask his record company. If you read the whole thing, you saw that I’m touring for eight weeks and that’s it. I’m taking a year and a half off after that. I deserve it, and it was in my contract to be able to do that.”

“What about me, Han? What am I going to do for a year and a half? Have you thought about that?” Shell hated to call her out on it, but this felt too selfish to her. Her whole life was tied up in Hannah and her business. Now, because Hannah was married, she was going to forget one of the people who had helped her get there?

Hannah had given some thought to that. “You’re gonna still be paid. Be a girlfriend to your boyfriend, spend some time with him, and find a hobby. Be normal. We haven’t done that in so long, Shell. I want it so much. I need it so much.”

The fight went out of Shell and she collapsed on the couch. “This is really what you want?”

“It is, and I want you to be happy for me. I want you to do all the things that you’ve never been able to because we’ve been on the road. I want you and Jared to have what Garrett and I have.”

The two of them were quiet for a long time.

“It scares me, you know?” Shell admitted.

“What does?”

“Spending all that time with Jared and not having you to do things for. What if I get on his nerves? What if you decide that you don’t need me anymore? What if you never come back to this, then where is my life and what do I do about all the time I’ve put into it. The love you have for Garrett is amazing and beautiful, but it worries me that you’re going to give everything up for him. I know I’m being selfish, but I can’t help but think of it. I’ve spent most of my adult life making sure you have everything you need and that you’re okay. You don’t need me anymore.”

“That’s not true at all.” Hannah put her arms around Shell’s neck and hugged her tightly. “I’m going to always need you, but I need him too. Life changes, it evolves. If you give Jared the chance to be your Garrett, he could be.”

“I know,” she grinned. “Maybe that’s what scares me the most.”

“It’s time for us to stand on our own. We’ve depended on each other for a long time, and now, we’ve got to do it apart.”

“I know.” Shell wrinkled her nose.

“When Garrett and I find a house here, this one is yours. I know you love it here, and I would never take your home away from you. Maybe you and Jared can make some amazing memories here.”

That sounded good to Shell. At least she wouldn’t be in this alone, she did have Jared, but she worried that she wouldn’t ever be enough for him. It would only take one thing to set him back, and she worried she was a trigger for him more than a help at times. Although she would never admit that out loud.

“Thank you.” Shell hugged Hannah back. “You know, as mad as I was at you earlier, I was proud too, ’cause you stood up for yourself.”

“I’ve got to. If I don’t, people are going to walk all over me and they are going to ruin the only things that make me happy in life. There’s more to life than when the next record is coming out and which tour we’re going to do next.”

That was a very mature way to put things, and again, Shell was impressed. “What do you think Bryson’s going to say?”

“I don’t really care,” Hannah laughed. “He and I have been friends for a long time. If he’s still my friend, then he’s going to understand.”

Shell laughed along with her, but there was a small part of her that wondered if Hannah knew exactly what she was doing. This could be the end of Harmony Stewart if they didn’t play this correctly, but this was Hannah’s decision to make and Shell knew that she would have to support her, no matter what.

*  *  *

“T
hat’s it, Hannah,” the sound engineer in the booth told her. “We’re done.”

“With the whole thing?” she asked, holding her headphones to her ears tightly, afraid that she might have heard him wrong. She knew they were getting close, but she hadn’t realized they were that close.

“With the whole thing! Go enjoy yourself for a week or so while we mix this and get record company approval.”

“You’ll send me the finished copy of everything?” she questioned.

He nodded, giving her a thumbs-up as she took the headphones off her head and made her way out of the booth.

“I think you’ve got somethin’ special here, Hannah,” he told her. “You’re voice has gotten much more mature, and you seem more comfortable with yourself. You’re fans are growing up, just like you are. They’re going to appreciate the changes that you’ve made in your life, and they’re going to be able to tell that you’re comfortable in your own skin.”

“I am.” She smiled. “I love the changes that I’ve made in my life.”

He reached up, giving her a hug. She had worked with Brett since she’d started in the business. He’d been the sound engineer on every single one of her albums. “They look good on ya, doll.”

She hurried around the studio, grabbing up her stuff. “When should I have the final product, do you think?”

He glanced at his watch. “Today’s Wednesday. I’d say by Friday of next week. Go have yourself a mini-vacation. Go visit that husband of yours.”

That was exactly what she was thinking too. “Thanks for workin’ so hard, Brett.” She reached down, giving him a hug around the shoulders.

“I only work as hard as the artist, and you, my friend, work your ass off. You deserve this break that I’ve heard rumblings about.”

She bit her lip, shifting her weight from one foot to the other. “Do you think I’m makin’ a mistake? You’ve been doin’ this a long time.”

“If you were a flash in the pan, I would tell you to strike while the iron is hot and don’t you dare take any time off. That you need to capitalize on everything you’ve got. But you’re Harmony Stewart, and you’ve changed the way we do things here on a certain level. You write amazing songs, you’re sweet, but at the same time you’re learning not to take any shit off other people. I say if you want to take some time off, you’ll be fine. If you’re burnt out and pissed off at the world, you’re not going to do anybody any good.”

“I need this time off,” she re-iterated. “But then I look at the long line of female country singers that took time off, that never made it back. LeeAnn Rimes, Shania Twain, Faith Hill. They’re still very respected and big names in the industry, but they never made it back.”

“They were also older than you when they took a break,” he raised his eyebrows. “And their breaks were years long. Not to mention, they didn’t have hot rocker husbands, like you.”

She smiled, a blush covering her face.

“Does making it back concern you so much?”

She shook her head. “I don’t think so, but it’s one of those things where I’m kind of on the fence about it. Sometimes I hate being so big that I can’t take time off, but then I think to myself, this isn’t everything that life is about. It’s a double-edged sword.”

He turned to face her. “With your social media presence, no one is going to wonder where you are or what you’re doing. At this point, they’re just as interested in what you and Garrett are doing together personally as they are what you’re doing professionally. This is a whole new world, a whole new ballgame. Ain’t nobody gonna forget Harmony Stewart.”

Hannah laughed, throwing her head back. “That’s right; ’cause we ain’t gonna let ’em.”

They hugged again before she made her way out of the studio. On this particular night, Shell had decided not to accompany her, so she quickly texted her to let her know they were done and she was getting a flight out of Nashville to Los Angeles. Her phone rang almost instantly.

“You’re not even waiting until morning?” Shell asked, “It’s almost nine at night.”

“Which means it’s seven there, and by the time I get there, it’ll be around midnight their time. I can sleep on the plane; it’s not that big of a deal.”