The Purity Myth (38 page)

Read The Purity Myth Online

Authors: Jessica Valenti

Tags: #Health & Fitness, #Sexuality, #Self-Help, #Personal Growth, #Self-Esteem, #Social Science, #Feminism & Feminist Theory, #Women's Studies

BOOK: The Purity Myth
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public sphere harassment: 158, 159 “Pure Fashion” shows: 49

Pure Love
(Evert): 34 “Pure Love Promise”: 34

purity: as brainless 27; connections with porn 87, 89, 91, 95; fathers’ protection of daughters’ 66, 69; feminism as lacking 164; vs. hypersexualization 9–10; innate 48–49; legislating 123; as misogynistic

myth 10–11, 201; and normalization of

rape 147–148, 157; as powerless 142–143; in secondary virginity 34–35; veneration of 28; via virginity 69; women of color as denied 158

purity balls: 10, 31, 32, 65–67, 68, 217

Pussycat Dolls: 97

Q r

queer sexuality: 109, 200 questions for discussion: 221–222 radical feminism: 177–178, 180

rape: date 150; defined by Senator Henry (D-TN) 145; denial of victim’s rights 145– 146; by Girls Gone Wild crew 152–154; “gray” 160–163; as innate to masculinity 174, 175; legislating 146; omission of

term 162–163; proving pregnancy from 138; shaming of victims 108–109; un- rapeability 147, 157; victims as blamed for 147–151, 155; women’s equality as blamed for 160–161, 164–165

Rape, Abuse & Incest National Network: 245

raunch culture: 97, 197

raves: 72

Ray, Audacia: 98–99 Real Dolls: 87–89

Real Hot 100: 204 “reality” porn: 85–86 Rees, Katie: 29

Reid, Sergeant Ronald: 146

jessica valenti
257

religion: 112

reproductive rights, protecting: 209 reproductive technology: 122–123 RH Reality Check: 118

Riley, Naomi Schaefer: 150, 163, 164

riot grrrls: 72–73

Rodriguez, Susan: 116

Roe v. Wade
: 124, 135

Roiphe, Katie: 150 Rubenstein, Andrea: 98 Rushkoff, Douglas: 181

s

Safe Horizon: 245

Salon.com: 87

Sarracino, Carmine: 82, 84

Save the Males: Why Men Matter, Why Women Should Care
(Parker): 178

“saving” yourself: 12, 32, 34, 36 schools: conservative politics in 115;

hypersexualization of girls at 64–65; salacious media reports on 46;
see also
education

science, politicized: 54, 105

Scott, Kevin: 82, 84

Seaman, Barrett: 163 secondary virginity: 34–36 Seipel, Emily: 37

self-definition, sex-based: 9, 15

Serano, Julia: 169

sex: anal 173; commodifying 61–62,

194–195; as a deliberate choice 193–194; and depression 51, 186; difficulty defining 20–21; as “dirty” 32–33, 41–42; with dolls 87–88; as draining oxytocin 54; drive, as male 51–52, 107, 172–173, 194; Plan B

as encouraging 129; pleasure as removed from 43, 56; premarital, damage done by 55; statistics 58–60, 119, 192; teaching

a healthy relationship to 193–194, 195; trusting young people with 198; under women’s control 95

Sex Has a Price Tag
(Stenzel): 101 sexism.
See
misogyny

Sex Respect
: 105, 108

sex toys: 87–89, 93

sex trafficking: 76–78

sexual abuse.
See
abuse, sexual

sexuality: and depression 50–51; as external to women 48–49; fathers’ obsession with daughters’ 69; feminism as attacking traditional female 57; as gift to be saved 32, 34, 36; as innate 50; legislating control of 127–128; LGBTQ 109; male vs. female 172–175, 180; morality as conflated with 23–24; naturalizing 199; non-ownership

of 97; pathologizing 188; punishing female 141; realistic reporting on youth 190–192; for sale 30–31; self-worth as

based in 10, 79, 96, 181; as tied to youth

13, 30, 67; virginity loss as defining 18; young vs. mature 72

Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States (SIECUS): 105, 207

sexualization: of celebrities 90; defined 64; in purity balls 69; of rape victims 148– 150; as tool of the virginity movement 65; of young women 218

Shalit, Wendy: 37, 48–51, 71

shame: abandoning bodily 97; vs. chastity 24; as mark of women of color 45; misinformation via 103; pornography and 84; of sexuality 30; of womanhood 72

Sheen, Charlie: 89

Sierra, Kathy: 159

Simpson, Jessica: 27

SisterSong Women of Color Reproductive Health Network: 245

sluts: as derisive label 10; feminism as producing 212, 213; media reports of 45–46

SMUT
: 210

Smuts, Barbara: 185

Snickers: 168

social value: 18

society: 55, 86

Society of Adolescent Medicine: 118 socio-economics, pregnancy and: 192 South Dakota: 132

$PREAD
: 210

Spears, Britney: 29–30

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the Purity myth

Stanek, Jill: 137
Stenberg v. Carhart
: 142 Stenzel, Pam: 101


Stepp, Laura Sessions: 47, 51–52, 161–162

St. Guillen, Imette: 148–150, 163

STIs (sexually transmitted infections): as dating danger 53; HPV 59, 70–71, 186;

misinformation on 104; statistics 59

Stoesz, Sara: 125

strength: 25–26, 51

submission, female: 52–53, 57

Suhl, Sean: 98

Suicide Girls: 98

“supermodels,” child: 78

Swartz, Shauna: 86

Szyszyka, Ms.: 153

t

Take Issue, Take Charge: 207 Tapia, Cassandra: 104

Target: 61, 70

teenage girls: abstinence education targeted to 112–113; choices of 37; denied Plan B 131; depression in 51; desire in 196; early menstruation 71–72; ethnic disparity in

STIs 59–60; mental health statistics 190; sex statistics for 59, 110, 119; sexuality as outside control of 97; as trusted with sex 193–194

Tequila, Tila: 90

Tesco: 70

The American Prospect
(Blustain): 132

The Thrill of the Chaste: Finding Fulfillment While Keeping Your Clothes On
(Eden): 47–48

trafficking, human: 76–78

Trafficking Victims Protection Act: 77

True Life
: 26–27

Trump, Donald: 29

Tullis, Wesley: 68

Turner, Janice: 102

uv

Ultrasound Informed Consent Act (2007): 133

ultrasounds, requiring: 133

Unhooked: How Young Women Pursue Sex, Delay Love and Lose at Both
(Stepp): 47
Unprotected: A Campus Psychiatrist Reveals

How Political Correctness in Her Profession Endangers Every Student
(Grossman): 48, 51–52, 53

Unruh, Leslee: 113–114, 206

vaginal rejuvenation: 13, 63, 73, 217 Vaginal Rejuvenation Institute: 74
The Vagina Monologues
: 93–94 value: 96, 194–195

victims, women as: 134, 135

Victoria’s Secret: 92

violence against women.
See
abuse, sexual virginity: commodifying 30–32, 39;

difficulty defining 19–21; doing away with myth of 203; history of 22–23; hymens

as proof of 75; loss 18; as a moral stance 12; pledges 37, 218; in politics 14; in pop

culture 26–27, 29; vaginal rejuvenation for 75;
see also
purity balls

Virginity Lost: An Intimate Portrait of First Sexual Experiences
(Carpenter): 21

virginity movement: antifeminism in 56– 57; anti-obscenity work 93–94; damage done by 187; defined 23; denial of pleasure in 43; ethnicity of 44, 60; feminist rhetoric as used by 37–38; focus on young girls

62–63, 72; gender roles as defined by 174; “ideal” woman as defined by 25; leaders of 113–115; lesbianism as absent from 56; paternalism in 134, 137; pathologizing

sex 32–33, 193; on porn 82, 99; reaction to this book 212–213; resources of 206; sexualization by 65, 79; traditional gender roles as heart of 31

Virginity Vouchers: 31

virgins: “desirable” 30, 62–63; as ethnically

white 44, 45; as female 21, 33; as powerless

142–143

Virgin: The Untouched History
(Blank): 19, 75

virgin/whore dichotomy: concurrent themes in 91; damage done by 13–14; “empowerment” rhetoric as reinforcing

jessica valenti
259

51; no gray area in 213; and normalization of rape 148; promotion of 82–83



w x y Z

Wagoner, James: 119

Warner, Judith: 69

Washington, Darren: 41

Waxman, Representative Henry: 104, 106 wealth: 89–90

Webb, Joanne: 93

welfare recipients: 139

Whipping Girl: A Transsexual Woman on Sexism and the Scapegoating of Femininity
(Serano): 169

White House Project: 245

Why kNOw
: 107 Wilka, Tim: 114

Wilson, Pastor Randy: 66–67 WIMNs Voices: 204

The Wimp Factor: Gender Gaps, Holy Wars, and the Politics of Anxious Masculinity
(Ducat): 168

Wired
: 78

Wolf, Naomi: 95–96

Woman: An Intimate Geography
(Angier): 199

women: pathologizing the body of 42–43; as property 22–23; statistics on single 58; trusting 198–200; virgins as 21

women of color: disparity in STIs among 59–60; hypersexualization of 45, 64;

“innocence” as absent for 47, 63; as not “rapeable” 157; trusting 200; violence

against 157–158, 217–218

women’s rights: feminism as serving 57–58; protecting reproductive 209, 240; rolling back reproductive 123–128; virginity movement attacks on 23

Women’s Right to Know laws: 132–133 Women’s Sports Foundation: 246 Women’s Voices, Women Vote: 246 Wood, Susan: 130

work, as discouraged for married women: 138–139

World Congress of Sexology (17th): 74 worth, sex-based: 10, 24, 79, 96, 181
Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual

Power & a World Without Rape
(Millar): 194

Younger Women’s Task Force: 246 youth obsession: 72–76

YouTube: 117

260
the Purity myth

ack nowledgments

Writing this book would have been impossible without the support of many people, but the biggest thanks go to my partner, Andrew Golis—thank you for believing that I can do anything, and for gently stopping me when I try to do everything.

My parents, Phil and Nancy, and my sister, Vanessa, have been a source of constant encouragement and inspiration. You’ve made everything I do pos- sible, and I’ll be forever grateful. I love you all.

Thanks to my friends who continue to surprise and challenge me ev- ery day: Gwen Beetham, Ann Friedman, Courtney Martin, Kate Mogulescu, Samhita Mukhopadhyay, and Miriam Perez.

I owe a tremendous debt of gratitude to the readers of Feministing.com.

261

I may not know you all by name, but knowing that you’re there—having amazing conversations in the comments section, blogging, or even just read- ing quietly at your computers—makes me happy every day. Thank you.

And lastly, thank you to Seal Press—especially to my editor and friend Brooke Warner—for believing in me from the beginning. Your continued support means the world to me.

262
the Purity myth

about the author

© ADAM JOSEPH

Jessica Valenti is the founder and editor of Feministing.com, a popular blog and online community. She is the author of
Full Frontal Feminism: A Young Woman’s Guide to Why Feminism Matters
and
He’s a Stud, She’s a Slut . . . and 49 Other Double Standards Every Woman Should Know,
and coeditor of the anthology
Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power and a World Without Rape.

Jessica’s writing has appeared in
The Nation,
the
Guardian
(U.K.),
Ms
. magazine, and
Bitch
magazine, and on Salon.com and Babble.com. She received her master’s degree in women’s and gender studies from Rutgers University, where she is now a part-time lecturer. Jessica lives with her part- ner, Andrew, in Queens, New York.

263

selected titles from seal press

For more than thirty years, Seal Press has published groundbreaking books. By women. For women. Visit our website at www.sealpress.com
. Check out the Seal Press blog at www.sealpress.com/blog.

Yes Means Yes: Visions of Female Sexual Power and A World Without Rape,
by Jaclyn Friedman and Jessica Valenti. $15.95, 1-58005-257-6. This powerful and revolutionary anthology offers a paradigm shift from the “No Means No” model, challenging men and women to truly value female sexual- ity and ultimately end rape.
Full Frontal Feminism: A Young Woman’s Guide to Why Feminism Mat- ters,
by Jessica Valenti. $15.95, 1-58005-201-0. A sassy and in-your-face look at contemporary feminism for women of all ages.
He’s A Stud, She’s A Slut and 49 Other Double Standards Every Woman Should Know,
by Jessica Valenti. $13.95, 1-58005-245-2. With sass, humor, and aplomb, Full Frontal Feminism author Jessica Valenti takes on the obnox- ious double standards women encounter every day.
Feminism and Pop Culture: Seal Studies,
by Andi Zeisler. $12.95, 1-58005- 237-1. Andi Zeisler, cofounder of Bitch magazine, traces the impact of femi- nism on pop culture (and vice versa) from the 1940s to today.

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