The Pursuit Of Marriage (34 page)

“She told me you weren’t coming back until tomorrow so I could finish the room and be out of here before you returned because you didn’t want to face me.”

“That’s absurd.” He scoffed. “Why wouldn’t I want to face you?”

“Because…” Cassie shook her head. “Never mind about that. It made sense at the time.”

“I doubt it.” He grit his teeth. “I asked her, and I might point out I asked her because she and Drummond were the only ones still remaining in the country, to carry a message to you. I certainly didn’t trust Drummond—”

“Why not?”

“Because he’s perfect! He’s everything you said you ever wanted. The blasted man is so bloody perfect even other men like him. I was certainly not about to throw him deliberately into your path.”

Her breath caught. “Why?”

“Because you might discover he was the one you really wanted. Damnation, Cassandra, you are an annoying female.” He glared and drew a calming breath. “I asked Miss Bellingham to tell you I wouldn’t return until tomorrow because I wished to surprise you.”

“Well, I’m certainly surprised,” Cassie murmured. This was not at all what she’d expected. He did not sound the least bit like a man who was about to throw her over to marry someone else.

“As am I.” Reggie stopped, and so did she. “Is that it then? That’s why you believed her?”

“Why on earth would she lie?” It was becoming very clear that Miss Bellingham had indeed lied. “It makes no sense whatsoever for her to wish me to think she is marrying you. She could have any man she wants.”

He grinned. “Apparently, she wants me.”

“She can have you then, because I don’t want you.”

“Now that, Miss Effington, is indeed a lie.” His gaze hardened. “What I find difficult to believe is that, once again, in spite of everything that has passed between us, you have misjudged me based on my reputation. Once again, you have not given me so much as the benefit of the doubt.”

“I didn’t, did I?” She cringed with the enormity of the realization. “I admit it. That might have been a mistake.”

“Might have been?”

“Yes. And if you enjoyed that, you’ll enjoy this as well. I have another admission to make.” She drew a deep breath. “I’ve been doing a great deal of thinking in the past few days—”

“Between camel purchases, no doubt.”

She paid him no heed. “And I think I may have jumped to unwarranted conclusions.”

“You?” He snorted in disbelief.

“Yes.” She paused to pull her thoughts together. “I should have at least given you the opportunity to explain, but you have to understand I was terribly confused and there were all these dreadful emotions obviously clouding my thinking—”

“Obviously.”

“I was deeply hurt.” She drew her brows together and met his gaze. “You broke my heart. I’ve never had my heart broken before. It plays havoc with rational thinking.”

“I did no such thing,” he said indignantly. “You allowed your heart to be broken. I had nothing to do with it.”

“How was I to know?”

“You should have trusted me. You should have had faith in me.”

“Why?”

“Because—”

“You gave me no real reason to have faith in you.” She planted her hands on her hips. “You made no promises to me. You did not declare your undying love, you never even declared your undying friendship.” She narrowed her gaze. “In truth this is all your doing. The blame for this can be laid completely at your feet.”

“My feet?” His voice rose. “What did I do?”

“Aside from being the infamous Lord Berkley, absolutely nothing.” She glared. “You never asked me to marry you, nor did you ever declare your feelings. And there was Miss Bellingham, Miss Wonderful, the woman who was just perfect for you, telling me all these things that she shouldn’t know. And you did spend an inordinate amount of time with her—”

“I did not!” He paused. “Well, perhaps I did, but only because I couldn’t spend any time with you.”

“What was I to think anyway?”

“You didn’t think!”

“We’ve already established that!”

“I offered to reform for you. Doesn’t that mean anything?”

“No!”

“You’re no better, you know.”

“What do you mean?”

He crossed his arms over his chest. “You never told me you loved me, nor did you ask me to marry you.”

She gasped. “It’s not my place to ask.”

He scoffed. “Come now, that’s never stopped you from doing anything in the past.”

“Nonetheless, should you ask,” she said before she could stop herself, “the answer is yes.”

“Why, Cassandra?” His gaze bored into hers. “Why would you agree to marry me?”

“Because I love you, you annoying, blasted beast of a man! There, I’ve said it. I hope you’re happy.”

“Blissful.”

“I’ve never felt about any man the way I feel about you.” Her voice rose. “You’re not the least bit perfect. You’re, you’re infamous! You’re everything I’ve never wanted and I can’t believe I want you now, but I do. In spite of my best intentions I,” her voice broke, “I do love you.”

Her words hung in the air between them.

“I’ve never said that before. I’ve never even thought it.” She huffed. “I’ve wanted to tell you but I couldn’t get the words out.” She folded her arms over her chest and looked anywhere but at him. “It’s ironic, isn’t it? I will say nearly anything, indeed I pride myself on it, yet I could not say something as important as this.”

He was silent for a long moment.

She held her breath and met his gaze. “Aren’t you going to say anything?”

“I have been in love so many times I’ve lost count,” he said slowly. “I have said the words so often they had lost meaning.” He started circling the pillows once more. She didn’t move. “I was afraid to say them again and afraid to risk my heart again.” He reached her and stared down at her. “And then I met you and I couldn’t say them at all because they had never truly meant so much before. You have my heart, Cassandra Effington.”

“Oh my.” She swallowed hard against the lump in her throat. “That was very good.”

His gray eyes gazed into hers. “I love you, Cassandra. I love the way you speak your mind and follow your heart. I love your passion and your stubbornness, and I love the way you admit when you’re wrong.”

She lifted her chin and ignored the tremble in her voice. “Then what do you intend to do about it?”

“Marry you, I suppose.” He pulled her into his arms and grinned. “After all, you’ve already said yes.”

“I’ve been something of an idiot, haven’t I?”

“Yes, you have.”

“I don’t want you to marry me unless you truly want to,” she said firmly. “I don’t want a husband forced to do so out of a sense of obligation. Because you ruined me.”

“I ruined you?” He laughed. “I was not the one who came to your bed.”

“Then perhaps I ruined you.” She smiled up at him and wanted nothing more than to be ruined once again.

“Ruined, my dear Cassandra, is a relative term.” He brushed his lips across hers. “Look around you.”

“I do apologize about this.” Pure joy surged through her and she laughed. “Still, it is rather…inviting, don’t you think?”

“I think it’s the perfect setting to begin”—he nuzzled her neck and she shivered—“a lifetime of adventure and excitement and passion.”

“Definitely passion.” She sighed and slid her hands around his neck. “Ruin me again.”

“There really isn’t time,” he murmured.

“We have all the time in the world.” She ran her fingers through his hair and pressed her body close to his. “I have references now, you know.”

He kissed the curve of her neck. “This is a mistake.”

“It will not be our first.”

“It will ruin the surprise.”

“Any more surprises can wait.”

“We probably have time.” He sighed in surrender. “I am a weak man, Cassandra.” He stepped backwards and pulled her with him. They tumbled together onto the pillows in a tangle of limbs and clothing and eager bodies. “And you are my weakness.”

Her lips met his with hunger sharpened by joy and the realization that they would indeed be together for the rest of their days.

He raised his head and grinned down at her. “I like this. Perhaps we should keep the drawing room this way.”

“Perhaps.” She laughed.

He heaved an overly dramatic sigh. “However, I do think the camel is staring at me. It’s most disconcerting.”

“Ignore him,” she said firmly and drew his lips to hers.

She wanted him, now and here, and suspected he would always make her feel like this. He pulled his lips from hers and trailed kisses down the side of her neck and her throat. She moaned with the pleasure of his touch. Her hands wandered over the firm curves of his shoulders and the hard muscles of his back. Once again, they had entirely too many clothes on, and they should certainly do something about that. Voices sounded outside the door, and he jerked his head up.

She stared at him. “Who in the world…”

“Surprise?” he said weakly.

She widened her eyes. “What do you mean, surprise?”

A knock sounded at the door.

“One moment,” he called. “You do truly want to marry me, don’t you?” He struggled to stand but couldn’t quite get his footing amidst the pillows.

“Yes, of course.” She had no better luck getting to her feet than he had. The knock sounded again, more insistent this time.

“Would you consider doing it at once?” He managed to stand unsteadily and reached out a hand to help her up. “We haven’t talked about it, but there is the possibility of children, and I think—”

“Yes, yes.” She laughed and flung her arms around him. “At once.”

He grabbed her shoulders and held her back to look into her eyes. “Now? This very moment?”

Giddiness bubbled up inside her and she laughed again. “Yes, this very moment.”

The doors flew open and Leo burst into the room.

“Ah-hah!” Leo glared with the self-righteousness of a man who had been proved right. “I knew it. I knew it all along. I knew you were the sister to watch. I knew the moment I turned my back you—”

“Do be quiet, Leo.” Delia pushed past her brother and paused. “Oh dear, this does look bad.”

Cassie smoothed her skirts and patted her hair. “Actually, it’s very, very good.”

“Perfect, I’d say.” Reggie took her hand, and they scrambled off the pillows. At once the room filled with familiar faces, each and every one staring at the obviously compromised couple. Cassie’s parents were here, as were two of her brothers, Delia and her husband, Lord and Lady Pennington, Lucy and Lady Berkley, and, good Lord, Mr. Drummond and all the Bellinghams. Cassie winced. Any hope of avoiding scandal was dashed.

Reggie leaned over and said softly, “Surprise.”

“You’ve said that.” She forced a pleasant smile. “What precisely is this?”

“This is most scandalous! I have never been so shocked.” Lady Bellingham glared in righteous indignation. “I may well swoon.”

“Don’t swoon, Mother,” Miss Bellingham murmured.

“You!” Cassie narrowed her gaze and stepped toward Miss Bellingham. “You lied to me.”

“Not precisely,” Miss Bellingham said coolly. “I may have led you to believe certain things that may not have been completely true.”

“Very well then,” Cassie snapped. “You misled me.”

“Yes?” Miss Bellingham looked at her as if wondering what her point was.

“Don’t you think that is, oh, what is the word?” Cassie elbowed Reggie.

“Wrong?” he said helpfully.

“That’s it exactly.” Cassie fairly spit the word. “Wrong!”

“Not at all. Lord Berkley is an excellent match. I saw an opportunity and I took it.” Miss Bellingham shrugged. “I don’t think anything is especially wrong, indeed I think nearly everything is fair, when it comes to this game we all play.”

“What game?” Lord Pennington said in an aside to his wife.

“Quiet,” Gwen said.

“Has anyone noticed this room?” Mr. Drummond murmured.

Miss Bellingham studied Cassie curiously. “It is a game, Miss Effington, this pursuit of marriage. One might, of course, be hopeful of finding love and happiness along the way as well, but marriage is the primary goal and we are all engaged in the game whether we admit it or not. Goodness, you should know better than anyone, you’ve been playing it long enough.”

Leo choked back a laugh.

Christian coughed.

Cassie’s father bit back a grin.

Reggie, bless his heart, didn’t so much as twitch.

“What did you say?” Cassie started toward her, but Reggie pulled her back and anchored his arm firmly about her waist.

“By my count you’ve been out in society at least seven seasons.” Miss Bellingham’s smile was deceptively pleasant. “How old are you?”

Cassie sputtered in indignation.

“She’s certainly old enough to know better.” Disapproval rang in Lady Bellingham’s voice. “I can’t believe a respectable young woman, a member of one of England’s most highly regarded families—”