The Queen of Cool (17 page)

Gritting her teeth, she pulled out and drove
to the Walgreens on Henderson. She grabbed one of every pregnancy
test from the shelf and checked out. Knowing Lisa, Mandy, and
Alisha were waiting for her at home, she asked the clerk to use
their bathroom.

“
Have to find out right
away?” the clerk smiled at Lo.

“
Something like that,” Lo
said.

“
It’s over by photo
processing,” the clerk said.

Lo smiled her thanks and made a beeline to
the bathroom. Locking the door, she read the instructions for one.
She opened a second for good measure. She peed on both at the same
time then peered at her watch.

Two minutes… Two minutes-thirty… and… Lo
looked at the sticks. Nothing.

Lo sighed with relief. She didn’t know what
she was thinking. She was in no condition to raise a baby by
herself. She could barely get through a day, let alone bring a life
into the world. She wasn’t sure if that Sy was more or less creepy
since he was wrong. More creepy. A wave of sadness overcame
her.

There would be no babies for her.

Unwilling to have a meltdown in the
Walgreens bathroom, she got up. She tossed the sticks on top of the
full trash and washed her hands. She brushed her hair for good
measure. She’d turned off the light and was holding the doorknob
when the light from the hallway highlighted the stick poking out of
the trash. Turning on the light, she closed the door and picked the
stick out of the used towels.

This one said she was pregnant.

Lo blinked. She dug through the trashcan for
the other stick. Not finding it, she put everything back in the can
and washed her hands. She was about to leave the bathroom when she
saw the other stick face down on the floor. She bent down to pick
it up.

This stick said she was pregnant. She looked
from one positive pregnancy test to the next.

She was pregnant. She was pregnant. She
was…

“
Oh my God! I’m pregnant,”
Lo said out loud.

Unwilling to think about it, Lo shoved the
tests in her purchase bag, washed her hands, and left the bathroom.
She trotted to Don’s truck and started toward home again. Not sure
what to tell the girls, she drove around for a while until she
ended up on Hillcrest where their house had been.

Jaden had arranged for someone to clear away
the house debris. Outside of Don’s precious grass and the big
trees, the lot was bare. Lo slipped off her shoes and walked out on
the yellowing front lawn. She wandered around the giant hole where
the house had been and went to the back yard. Somehow, the clean-up
crew had missed the tree swing. She sat down on the swing.

The garden was gone. The backyard had been
scraped. Even her beautiful rose bushes were gone. She rocked back
and forth on the swing in silence.

For the first time in forty days, her head
was clear and completely blank. She had no idea what to do next.
She didn’t feel alone. She didn’t feel really sad. For this moment
in time, she was just here, on this swing, fully present. She sat
on the swing under the tree they’d planted when they came home from
their honeymoon until she heard a car door slam. She looked over to
see Larry exiting his FWPD cruiser.

“
You know you can’t be
here, Lo,” Larry said.

“
Why?” Lo asked. “I own the
property.”

“
It’s a construction zone,”
Larry said. “It’s not safe.”

Lo gave a slight nod. He held out his arms
and they held each other close.

“
Was today hard?” Larry
asked.

“
Brutal,” Lo
said.

“
I have to get back to
work,” Larry said. “Come on, I’ll walk you to the
truck.”

With his arm around her, he guided her back
to the truck and hugged her again. She was turning onto Clarke
Street when a dark sedan pulled up to the house. In her rearview
mirror, she saw two men wearing dark suits, short dark hair, and
mirrored sunglasses get out of the vehicle. She caught Larry’s
quick look in her direction and his gesture in the other. Unnerved,
she took the side streets back to Fairmount Historic District and
her hideaway. She pulled into a garage space and closed the
automatic garage door behind her.

She waited in the truck for a moment. Her
ears strained to hear if the sedan had followed her. Nothing. She
closed her eyes. This was the first time she’d been scared, really
scared. She let out a breath to try to quell her pounding heart.
Looking up, she was startled and let out a little scream.

Alisha was standing outside her door.
Laughing at Lo, Alisha opened her door and hugged Lo.

“
How did it go?” Alisha
asked.

Lo grimaced and Alisha nodded. She was about
to tell Alisha her news when Mandy yelled from the top of the
stairwell:

“
Lo! We have a new addition
to our family!”

Lo’s jaw dropped. How could they know? Did
that horrible man tell them? Mandy moved aside and a tan and white
dog hurtled down the stairs. Exuberant Truman jumped on Lo and Lo
laughed.

“
Come on!” Mandy said.
“Mindy Sue is here. She’s going to show us how to work with
him.”

There was a whistle and Truman spun in
place. He ran up the stairs to Mindy Sue. Lo and Alisha followed.
In the excitement of the new puppy, Lo pushed aside the news that
she might be pregnant. She’d have to tell them at some point. Just
not now.

Looking up, she noticed Yazmin looking at
her. As if to say, “I’ve been waiting for you to notice,” Yazmin
nodded to Lo. Yazmin had known the entire time. Of course. Lo
smiled and hugged Yazmin. Truman barked and the moment passed. For
the first time in a very long time, Lo felt the tiniest bit of
hope. Smiling, she joined the puppy madness.

Q

CHAPTER TEN

Saturday morning—8:45 a.m.
Fairmount Historic District, Fort Worth, Texas

Days: 41

“
Oh shoot,” Lo said from
the wooden landing above the garage. Mutt’s legs stuck out from the
underside of the truck. She jogged down the stairs. “Are you going
to take much longer?”

Mutt rolled out on a trolley from under the
truck and wiped his hands on an old red cloth.

“
Good morning, Lo,” Mutt
smiled at the impatient look on her face. “Did you bring some of
Yazmin’s yummy coffee with you?”

Lo put her hand on her hip.

“
Thank you Mutt. You’re
such a great friend,” Mutt imitated her voice. “I was so concerned
that the truck might not be in great shape for my long drive today.
You always take such good care of me.”

Lo couldn’t help but laugh. He laughed and
closed the truck’s hood.

“
Thanks Mutt. I do
appreciate you,” Lo kissed his cheek. “I was just hoping to take
it. I have an appointment.”

“
What doctor works on
Saturday?” Mutt asked.

“
Doctor?” Lo blinked at him
as if she didn’t know what he was talking about. He
laughed.

“
The truck is yours,” Mutt
said. “Everything is tip top. I changed the oil and filters. I
checked the brakes just to make Yazmin happy. You know Donny had me
keep this truck in great shape. ‘I’m driving Lo this week,’ he’d
say. ‘Got to be in great shape.’”

Lo smiled at all the subtle ways Don took
care of her.

“
I agree with Yazmin,
though,” Mutt said. “You should get it repainted.”

“
That seems awfully
dramatic,” Lo said.

“
What’s a little drama when
people are out to get you?” Mutt asked. “I have a cousin who will
do it tonight. You won’t miss it.”

“
Cousin?” Lo raised her
eyebrows at any mention of Mutt’s cousins. He laughed.

“
You know the Romani: we’re
all cousins in one way or another,” Mutt said. “Listen, I wanted to
talk to you about Yazmin.”

Lo pursed her eyebrows and wondered if she
had time for this conversation.

“
You have time,” Mutt
said.

“
We’ve talked about this,”
Lo said.

“
We have,” Mutt said. “But
Donny’s dead, Lo. It makes me realize that I don’t have a lot of
time to waste.”

Mutt’s eyes filled with tears. He shook his
head and looked away from her.

“
Why didn’t you marry in
your teens?” Lo asked trying to steer the conversation away from
Yazmin.

“
My mother’s favorite
sister was forced into a marriage she didn’t want,” Mutt said. “It
was the death of her. My mother refused to arrange any of our
marriages. She told us we should only marry the one we love. My
sisters married early, but I… waited. That’s why I want to talk to
you about Yazmin.”

Lo’s plan had failed. All roads lead to
Yazmin. Lo sighed.

“
I need you to listen to me
and be honest,” Mutt said. “Consider it payment for the oil
change.”

“
Fair enough,” Lo
said.

“
Yazmin loves me,” Mutt
raised his eyebrows and Lo nodded.

“
She won’t marry me,” Mutt
said. “She says I’m unreliable. I was stone sober for five years
before Donny died. I slipped up for less than a month
and…”

Lo raised her hands in submission to his
usual frustration.

“
She was like
a goddess this last time,” Mutt said. “She stayed with me through
the shakes and the suffering. She cleaned up everything. She bathed
me in cool water and held me every night. Every action, every
moment, I could see her love for me in her eyes
and
her
actions. Once I was through it, she’s back to, ‘I belong to
Lorraina, you know that.’ I’ve asked and asked and asked… Please
Lo, just tell me why. With Donny dead, I know it’s now or never for
me.”

He cleared his throat to keep the sorrow at
bay, but the tears slid down his cheeks.

“
Why does Yazmin belong to
you?” Mutt asked.

Lo’s eyes took
in the man who Don had loved completely and without hesitation.
Mutt had been Don’s rock through the darkest hours of his life.
When everyone in Don’s life told him he was an idiot to marry Lo,
Mutt convinced him he was an idiot if he
didn’t
marry her.
Closing her eyes at his face, she knew how much he loved Yazmin.
She opened her eyes and smiled.

“
How much do you know about
Yazmin?” Lo asked.

“
I know I love her, and
have loved her from the moment I met her ten years ago,” Mutt
said.

“
Her history,” Lo
said.

Mutt shook his head.

“
Short version, because you
should hear this from Yazmin,” Lo said. “You know she’s originally
from Mexico?”

Mutt nodded.

“
She was stolen out of her
parent’s front yard when she was about ten by a man who was wanted
in the United States for killing at least two of his wives,” Lo
said. “He moved to Fort Worth and she got a job with us. We didn’t
know she was twelve or… I’m not sure she knows how old she is. We
didn’t know what was going on… didn’t see it, really. His treatment
left her wizened. She was small but… she’s always seemed older,
older than me, certainly.”

Mutt’s face was grim.

“
You asked,” Lo
said.

“
I want to know,” Mutt
said. “I can handle it.”

“
That man was an
over-the-road trucker. He was gone most of the time, so I used to
take her home after I got home from Baylor. For whatever reason, he
happened to be home one day. He saw me and went kind of crazy. I
drove as fast as I could to the police station. Larry had just
started at FWPD. He came right over and… He saved Yazmin’s
life.”

“
She couldn’t go home,”
Mutt rubbed his forehead. “And I know no Romani man could take her
after she’d been with that… monster.”

“
You should have seen
everyone. No one knew what to do. Everyone was upset. But her
father couldn’t take her back. It would have ruined her life. Her
mother wailed with grief as if she was dead,” Lo said. “Don
couldn’t marry her because… well, you know Don. I took her as my
ward. That’s why I started modeling.”

“
I always wondered,” Mutt
said. “I asked Don but he never said.”

“
I had to prove I could
support her in my own right,” Lo said. “We helped her brother
immigrate. She lives with him, but you know he can’t take
responsibility for her.”

“
Will you give her to me?”
Mutt asked.

“
As far as I’m concerned,
she belongs to herself,” Lo said.

“
Of course,” Mutt said. “I
didn’t mean it the way it sounds.”

“
I’ll talk to her again. In
your favor, she’s never said no.”

“
She’s never said yes,
though,” Mutt said.

“
I think you need to hear
her whole story,” Lo said. “I’ll see if she’ll tell you. She needs
you to know everything so you know how damaged she is. Or that’s
what she says. But Mutt, you have to be sober. No more alcohol
ever. Period.”

“
On my life,” Mutt said.
“I’ll be so clean and square, you’ll start calling me by my
Christian name, Matthew.”

Lo laughed. He opened the driver’s side door
for her and helped her in the truck.

“
What happened to the
trucker?” Mutt asked through her open window.

“
He was killed in prison a
couple of years later by the cousin of the first girl he stole,” Lo
said. “You don’t have to carry that burden.”