The Queen of Cool (47 page)

“
Listen, I wanted to…”
Alisha said at the same time Mindy Sue said, ”Your mom…”

“
I’m sorry, go ahead,”
Alisha smiled at Mindy Sue.

“
Where’s your guy?” Mindy
Sue asked.

“
Rick? He’s in Boston,”
Alisha said. “His father wanted him to look at a company and I…
didn’t know all of this… I didn’t know they were…”

“
No one did,” Mindy Sue
said. “I think that’s why they got so far. No one knew.
Otherwise…”

Mindy Sue sighed.

“
Lo saved Manny’s life. If
she hadn’t forced her sweatshirt into the wound… I’d be… a w-widow
like…her,” Mindy Sue glanced at Alisha. “I thought they were having
an affair, you know. All this time. The moment I heard that Don had
died, I thought ‘Great. Now she’s going to have my man.’ And then
Manny changed. He started bringing me flowers every Friday. He’d
get up with the kids on the weekend so I could sleep. He… I was
sure he was screwing beautiful Lolita. I mean, look at me? I’m no
fitness model, that’s for sure!

“
I never once thought of
how horrible it must be for her to lose Don. I never once wondered
how she was doing. I knew she lost the house and Manny told me when
her apartment burned down. But… When Manny left tonight, he gave me
this journal.”

Mindy Sue waved a bound book in Alisha’s
direction.

“
He said it
was about me. I opened it and… It’s about how much he loves me
and…” Mindy Sue’s eyes reflected her despair. “And then… I
saw
my
Manny lying on that floor and…”

Mindy Sue broke down. Alisha rubbed her
back. A tough woman, Mindy Sue pushed her fists into her leaking
eyes to gain control. After a moment, she blinked her tears and sat
up straight.

“
I can’t imagine my life
without Manny. I can’t…” Mindy Sue whispered.

Alisha hugged her.

“
You saved them all,”
Alisha said. “If you hadn’t confronted Detective Rodriguez, we’d
never have known what was going on. I don’t know why you called
Amanda, but we’re both really glad we were there. Lo would be dead
without you.”

“
I didn’t call Amanda,”
Mindy Sue said. “I called that horrible woman, Ruth Ann. She gave
me Larry’s number. She just said that Larry was living with some
young whore. I didn’t know it was your sister until I was speaking
with her. So I didn’t really do anything.”

Alisha bumped her shoulder into Mindy Sue’s
shoulder.

“
Don’t add misery to
misery,” Alisha gave a slight smile and took a drink of coffee. “My
dad used to say that. I don’t think I really understood what it
meant until just now.”

Tears streamed down Mindy Sue’s face.

“
My biological
parents killed so many people,” Alisha said. “And, as of today,
they can’t kill a single other person. That’s a big deal. If Dad
was here, he’d say we shouldn’t let what we coulda, woulda, shoulda
done take away from the celebration of what we
have
done.”

Mindy Sue shook her head.

“
Think of it this way,”
Alisha smiled. “Manny’s going to recover. Mom’s going to recover
and have my brother.”

“
And Sy?” Mindy Sue wiped
her tears.

“
We got to him in time and
he’s going to be just fine. His Aunt Jean-Jean is with him now. She
helped my dad and I know she’ll help Sy.” Feeling every bit Don
Downs’s daughter, Alisha spoke with more confidence than she felt.
“I just know it. They’re all going to be fine. In six months, we’ll
be eating cake, playing with baby Donny, and celebrating saving the
world from that horrible VX. We’ll probably get a Texas medal of
valor or something.”

Mindy Sue clung to Alisha.

“
Why don’t you go home for
a while?” Alisha asked. “We’re taking shifts. I’m here until six.
Lisa and Amanda are going to relieve me then. Yazmin and Larry are
coming after them. Why don’t you get some rest? You can bring
breakfast in the morning.”

“
You sure?” Mindy Sue
asked.

“
I’ll call you the moment
anything changes,” Alisha said.

“
For any of them?” Mindy
Sue asked. “Lo and Sy too?”

“
Lo and Sy too,” Alisha
smiled.

“
I can check on the kids,”
Mindy Sue nodded.

“
I’m sure they’re worried
sick,” Alisha said.

Mindy Sue fumbled with her purse and jacket.
Alisha stood to help her. They hugged.

“
You’ll call me if anything
changes?”

Alisha nodded.

“
Good or bad?” Mindy Sue
asked.

Alisha nodded.

“
For any of
them?”

“
I’ll call,” Alisha said.
“Promise.”

Mindy Sue nodded her head. Her eyes searched
Alisha’s face. She turned and left the waiting room. Alisha watched
her back until she left the building. She leaned back and settled
in for a long night.

Q

Friday, early morning—4:15 a.m.

Days: 197

Alisha watched from the window while the
nurse checked on Lo.

“
You should get some rest,”
the nurse said on her way out. “This is going to be a long
road.”

Alisha smiled and nodded at the nurse. The
woman touched Alisha’s arm and went to the nurse’s station a few
feet away. Alisha waited for the nurse to go into another room
before slipping into Lo’s room. Lo’s bedside was filled with
medical equipment. Alisha stood near the bed trying to decide what
to do.

“
Go on,” she whispered to
herself. “This is your chance.”

She took a step forward and picked up Lo’s
hand.

“
Mom,” Alisha whispered. “I
know you can hear me.”

A flood of emotion overcame the young woman
and she gulped for air.

“
It was me who found you,”
Alisha said. “You probably don’t remember. I saw you playing Marco
Polo with Lisa and Manny in the Forest Park Pool. I saw you there
and… and I knew you were my mom. I got Mandy to complain to Dad
about how bored we were in summer camp. We really whined and
complained until he had to look for someone for us and… I talked
our Housekeeper into interviewing you, even though you were young
and I made sure Dad found you because… you’re my mom.”

Alisha swallowed hard.

“
And everybody
said, ‘Poor Alisha, her horrible letch of a father married a girl
who’s only five years older than she. How awful.’ They shook their
heads and everything, but all I wanted was for you to be my mom. I
didn’t think about Dad loving you so much or how much you would
love him or how much better our
whole life
would be
once you were there, or Mandy or… I just wanted you to be my
mom.”

Alisha nodded to herself.

“
And when I
was in high school and I was
crazy
and everyone
said it was because you were Homecoming Queen and stuff, but you
knew why I was so crazy. You knew. You just knew; I didn’t even
have to tell you. You just knew that I wanted to be loved and that
I felt like maybe no one would ever love me for me. You didn’t
blame anyone or say it was Sue Ellen’s fault or Dad’s or that Mandy
was cuter or whatever. You just saw my heart and knew that I
wouldn’t feel loved even if I was… what did you say, ‘in a pool of
love.’”

Alisha smiled at her own imitation of Lo’s
voice.

“
Dad made me go to therapy,
but you always made time afterwards so we could talk. You kept
telling me that someday I’d know that you loved me. I’d just wake
up to the amazing person I was and see how much everyone loved
me.”

Alisha saw movement in the hallway and
ducked down beside the bed. She waited a moment then stood up
again.

“
I wanted you to know that
I get it,” Alisha said. “You’re in between because you love me and
for the first time…”

Alisha touched her heart.

“
I feel it right here,” she
whispered. “I feel how beautiful I am and how much you love me. I
get it. So…”

She grit her teeth, wiped her eyes, and
stood up.

“
If you want to stay with
Dad, I’ll understand,” Alisha said. “I won’t even be mad because
finally, after all of these years and all of your love, I get it. I
don’t know how or why, I just do.”

She leaned over to kiss Lo’s cheek.

“
But if you decide to come
back, no matter how hard it is, I’ll be with you every single step
of the way,” Alisha said. “I’ll love you back to health like you
loved me back to health in high school.”

Unable to control her grief, Alisha ran from
the room.

Q

Under the bright high mountain stars, Lo was
drinking campfire coffee and laughing at something Don said when
she heard:

“
Mom,” Alisha whispered.
“I know you can hear me.”

“
Alisha?” Lo looked around
their camp site. Don smiled at her. “Can you hear her
too?”

“
Of course,” Don
said.

Lo looked at Don and their eyes held. While
Alisha poured her heart out, they gazed at each other.

“
Did you know she found you
for me?” he asked.

She shook her head.

“
You?” she
asked.

“
I learned a lot when I got
here,” Don said. “I was less distracted than you’ve been. I had a
chance to nose around in everyone’s life.”

She smiled.

“
You can stay here with
me,” Don said. “Or you can go back for a while and then return to
me.”

“
I can’t live without you,
Don,” Lo said.

“
You haven’t,” Don
said.

“
I won’t,” she
said.

“
I will be here, right
here, waiting for you,” Don said. “You wanted to raise your own
children – our children. You wanted to do other things with your
life than just model. You had so many plans…”

“
Every single plan ended
when you died,” Lo shook her head. “I can’t do it without
you.”

“
You won’t have to. I’ll be
here,” Don touched her forehead, “and here. Always.”

He touched her heart. Lo kissed him. Her
eyes scanned his face. In his eyes, she saw that he was trying to
get her to do what he thought she wanted to do.

“
So your
choice is really – spend an eternity
here
with me or go
spend a few years there and come back
here
to spend an
eternity.” He smiled. “A few years out of an eternity to raise a
child or two, see the girls get married, eat pizza, get
fat…”

He tickled her and she laughed.

“
Love you Lo,” he said. “I
just love you – here, there, everywhere.”

Lo’s eyes filled with tears.

“
And even if you find
someone else to warm your bed, I’ll love you anyway. I’ll always
warm your heart,” he said. “For now until eternity is over, I will
wait for you every single day until you’re back here where you
belong . With me.”

He caught a tear with the knuckle of his
index finger.

“
I love you enough to let
you go,” Don said. “I love you enough for you to have what you
want. I won’t ever give up or stop waiting for you. I’ll be right
here when you’ve lived your full life and return to me.”

He held her when she began to sob. In her
sorrow, she felt the same flood of his love. The world spun and
they were standing at the split-rail fence next to the path again.
Sy and Renee clung to each other nearby. Don’s lips touched Lo’s
and she felt flooded with joy, peace, and love.

When she opened her eyes, she was standing
on the path near the stream. She gave a longing look down the path.
Her heart and soul yearned to run back to the fence, run back to
Don, and run back to an eternity of love and joy. Knowing what it
cost Don to send her on her way, she took down the metal cup from
the nail on the tree. She filled the cup and sat down on a
rock.

Unable to go back to Don and unwilling to
return to her life, Lo dangled her feet in the water and tried to
reason. She knew Don was right. In the grand scheme of things, her
years of life were nothing compared to the eternity they would
spend together. She did want to raise this baby and maybe others.
She wanted to see Alisha married and Amanda happy. She wanted
grandchildren to play with and ice cream on hot days.

And she wanted Don.

Nodding to herself, she stepped into the
stream. Her feet clung to one round mossy rock after another. She
took a step and scattered a few tiny fish. A frog appeared at the
edge of the river. As if to encourage her along her way, the frog
gave a loud “Ribbit.” Lo laughed. Standing in the middle of the
stream, she saw evidence of other souls who had lingered at this
spot on the stream. There was a star woven from small sticks, a
fishing line, a rock cairn, and a small dam that widened the stream
into a wading pool. She wondered what the other people had
done.

Did they run back to the fence?

Or did they return to their life?

Caught in her dilemma, she wandered from
stone to stone back to the edge of the stream and sat back on her
rock. She sat with her feet in the cool water of the placid stream
for time uncounted. Hearing footsteps, she looked up to see a man
running toward her.

“
Waiting for
me?”

Lo smiled.