The Road to Redemption (16 page)

He was going to continue with something along the lines of “what makes you think I am unhappy”, but thought better of it. He tried a different tack:

“My wife’s a lousy fuck.” Dr Rush looked flustered and started to go red around her neck.

“OK, John if we are going to continue with this conversation I want you to use civil language.”

He was about to sidetrack her into a discussion as to what constituted civil language, but thought better of it.

“All right she’s lousy in bed.”

“Is that what brought you here then John?”

“No she’s always been a lousy... I mean bad in bed.”

“OK then what else was it?”

“George is an arsehole.”

“John, I won’t tell you again.”

“OK, I don’t like George.”

“Who is George?”

“He’s Audry’s Father”

“Audry is your wife isn’t she?”

“Yes.”

Then you are having problems in the bedroom with your wife and you don’t like her father.”

“Something like that.”

“OK, then these seem to be long term problems and we can arrange some counseling for you and your wife and perhaps some mediation with your father-in law. She paused,

“What is it though that has been troubling you more recently?”

“Alice in Wonderland.” She looked at him surprised.

“Alice in Wonderland, that’s a children's tale by Lewis Carroll, John. What has that got to do with you?”

John was again tempted to spray her, that he thought Alice in Wonderland had overtones of pedophilia, but again thought better of it.

“No not Alice in Wonderland, Alice.”

“Alice is a fictional character John.” He could see she was showing greater concern about his real mental state and thought he had better come straight.

“No, not Alice from the story, Alice Johnson.”

“Who is Alice Johnson and why are you calling her Alice in Wonderland?”

“Alice Johnson is my neighbour and her parents named her after Alice in Wonderland.”

He could see the level of concern start to lessen from the young doctor’s face.

“OK, so Alice Johnson is your neighbour and she did something recently that upset you.”

At this point Dr Rush was thinking it must be some sort of neighbourhood dispute.

“No she told me to go back to my fancy wife and my fancy house and car.” Dr Rush did a quick double take,

“Oh, so you were having an affair with your neighbour, Alice Johnson and she broke it off? Is that what the problem is John?”

“Yeah, something like that,” he muttered

“John a lot of people have affairs and in most cases they get over them and quite often the marriage can survive quite in tact.”

She was starting to lecture him now and he didn’t like it so decided he would stir her up again.

“Yeah, Alice likes it from behind and she comes five times a session.” He thought he would add a couple for effect. Dr Rush was going really red around the neck now.

“OK, John that’s enough I am not a sex therapist, you will have to discuss this with someone who is trained in that field and unfortunately we don’t have anyone here.”

John felt like saying he could only discuss it now she had got him talking about it, but again thought discretion would be the better part of valour. These psychiatrists have no sense of humour he thought.

“OK John, is there anything else?”

“No not really, how long are you going to keep me here?”

“That depends on you John. At present we intend to keep you here for a while for observation. We will send you home when we think you are better. But that will depend on Dr Smith, he will be having a talk with you this afternoon.”

“OK, what am I supposed to do now?”

“Well you are free to wander around as you like. We have a library on the first floor. You might like to borrow a book from there.”

John left her office and decided to have a look around. The hospital was really a big old house, with very high ceilings and the remnants of what had once been a very fine home. Almost a mansion thought John and bigger than most of the homes where he used to do gardening when he was young. In some places the ceiling patterns were still in place, but elsewhere they had been replaced by plain white ceilings. It looked like whole parts had been added on, as the ceilings were lower and there were no friezes on the walls, or roses around the lights. The corridors had lino on the floors where once there would have been carpet. At the end of the corridor a lift had been added. There were a couple of elaborate staircases that were still in good condition with their hand carved banisters.

Out the back were some buildings that looked like they might have once been stables. They were now being used as storehouses. Across the front was a large veranda from which a path led down to iron security gates and a high brick wall along the street frontage. There was a large fountain in the middle of the front lawn and gardens and trees around the perimeter.

Down the hall from the front door was a large room where a lot of noise seemed to be coming from. John thought he would have a look in there. About 20 patients were wandering around doing various things. A guy in his 40’s standing in a corner beckoned John over. He spoke in a very hushed voice

“It’s all rigged.”

“What’s all rigged,” asked John?”

“The stock market, they get together every night and decide whether it will go up or down.”

“Who gets together?”

”The ones that control it.”

“Well I don’t know,” said John, “everything seems to be rigged in one way or another these days.”

“Yeah, but they took $5 million off me.”

Just then Dr Rush approached.

“Time for your medication Dan.”

She handed him a glass of water and a bunch of pills in a little plastic cup, which he took without question.

“Could I have a word with you over here John?” They walked a short distance.

“ I don’t want you upsetting Dan. He can become quite distressed if you talk to him too much about the stock market.”

Did he really lose $5 million?”

“I don’t really know John. Its something he says to every new person he meets.”

“Sounds like he’s a bit schizoid to me,” offered John.

She looked at him quite surprised and from her expression he could tell he was correct in his diagnosis.  But she soon recovered.

“That will be enough of that John. I am not going to discuss other patients with you and you are not here to diagnose other patients. Just concentrate on getting well yourself.”

John smiled. He could see that she was finding him a real challenge but was somehow up for it.

He wandered outside.

A sweet little old lady came up to him,

“Hi, I’m Lizzie what's your name.”

“I’m John.”

“Have you met Thomas?”

“No I haven’t met Thomas,” said John.

“OK, Thomas this is John.”

John looked around but there was no one there. Then he noticed her outstretched arm.

“Thomas don’t be shy, shake hands with John.”

By this time he was on to it and put out his hand and shook hands with the imaginary Thomas.

“He’s been a good boy today. Come along Thomas its nearly time for lunch.” And off she toddled.

He decided to go up to the Library and have a look at what they had. Dr Rush was just coming out the door with pills for other patients.

“Just met Lizzie and Thomas. Lovely little boy isn’t he? How long have they been coming here?”

“About five....” she started to answer. Suddenly she realized that John had tricked her and she was about to give out patient information.

“Look John you’d better stay out of it if you know what's good for you.” And with that they continued on their separate ways.

Not a bad library for a nut house he thought. He found a book about Steve McQueen when he heard a bell ring. Must be lunchtime, he thought.

Downstairs to the cafeteria where he got a plate of sandwiches. Where to sit? Everyone seemed to have their own special seat. He found a seat next to a pretty looking young girl.

“OK if I sit here?” he asked?

She just nodded.

I wonder what she’s in here for thought John. Maybe a drug overdose or something. He noticed she had her head down and didn’t seem to want to talk to anyone. He also wondered why she had a jumper on when it was quite a hot day. Then he saw it. She moved her arm and quickly covered the bandage, when she realized she had exposed it.

A suicide attempt and such a pretty girl, thought John.

After lunch he wandered outside and found a spot under a tree and started trying to read his book. It was a very hot day with a hot westerly wind blowing. Boy it’s hot he thought, must be at least 37 degrees. The wind kept blowing the pages over and even though he was sitting under a tree, it was as hot as hell. Real bush fire weather he thought.

He could really relate to Steve McQueen. A boy from the wrong side of town who started off as a cowboy in the TV series “Wanted Dead or Alive” and had worked his way up to be one of the highest paid actors in Hollywood.  Fighting against the heat and wind, he had only read a few pages when Dr Rush came looking for him.

“Dr Smith will see you now.”

He got up and followed her, engaging in some meaningless conversation about the weather.

Dr Smith was a bald headed man with a big pot belly. John put his age as somewhere in his mid 60’s. He didn’t look very pleasant. Dr Rush handed him a folder she had been carrying and left.

“Sit down John,” said Dr Smith, without any other pleasantries and started to casually flick through the notes in the folder. For some reason John immediately sensed he wasn’t going to like this guy. There would be no fun to be had here.

“I see from Janet’s, I mean Dr Rush’s notes.” Ah thought John, I have her first name now.

“ I see,” he continued, “that you have been having some sort of an affair with one of your neighbours.”

“Would you like to talk to me about that?”

I certainly would not, thought John; you look like a dirty old perve to me. But he couldn't say what he was thinking, so he responded with,

“I don’t really like to talk about it.”

“Really, that's not what Dr Rush’s notes indicate. You seemed quite happy to talk about it with her.”

How am I going to get out of this, thought John. He looks like a hanging judge to me and could keep me in here forever, if I am not careful.

“Well its just that its over now and it hurts every time I think about it.”

Dr Smith looked up from the notes and peered at John over the top of his glasses.