The Rules of Love (16 page)

Even though Ronald had always been exceptionally fair in his domination of Kenneth, he’d never included him in the implementation of the rules. He didn’t even want to contemplate Preston’s methods of deciding how things should be done.

“Agreed, Sir.”

“Good. Very good.” Saul took a sip of his coffee before setting it down again. “Do you mind telling me a bit about your first Master? I assume he’s the one you had before you ended up with Preston?”

Kenneth nodded. “Yes, Sir.” He wanted to tell Saul about Ronald. He was the first person he’d ever wanted to share those times with. “Ronald found me when I was working at an antique shop in Hollywood. I was just eighteen and had only been in town for about…oh, I’d say about six months. I’d saved up the train fare to come from Chicago because I’d heard that there were tons of jobs out here. Plus, I wanted the sunshine. It’s too cold back east.”

Saul grunted. “Isn’t it though? I’m from Jersey, so I completely understand your thinking. It was part of my reasoning too.”

“Oh.”

Kenneth had never wondered where Saul had come from. All he’d cared about was that he was currently in Los Angeles.

“Then what happened?”

“He was told by the shop owner that I’d been training on how to restore old furniture and that I was a natural with it.”

“Were you?”

Kenneth’s face heated. “I thought so. I really liked it.”

“Hmm. This is good information. I have a few pieces here that belonged to my grandmother that are in quite a sorry state. If you’re so inclined, I’d love to have you take a look at them.”

“I’d be happy to do it. I’ve missed that so much the past few years.”

“So it was something you did when you were with Ronald, but then it was taken away when you ended up with Preston. Is that the case?”

Kenneth turned his head away, his eyes filling with tears. It hadn’t occurred to him until that moment how Preston had literally stripped his life of everything that had held meaning for him. He hadn’t even been allowed to contact his aunt or anyone he’d ever known. Preston had stolen four years of his life that he’d never get back because he’d trusted the wrong person. He didn’t want to be angry with Ronald. He’d loved him so much and he’d been so good to him, but Ronald should’ve warned him about people like Preston. He’d had no idea that something like that could’ve ever happened to him.

“It’s all done now, dearest. I’m here with you and I won’t go away.”

He faced Saul again, swiping at the tears that had fallen on his cheeks. “Ronald went away.”

“But he didn’t mean to, right? What happened?”

“He got cancer of the liver. Years before when he’d been traveling in the near east, he’d contracted hepatitis. We didn’t find out until he was very far gone. The doctors said there wasn’t much that could’ve been done anyway. Still, I like to think if we’d known sooner…” Kenneth swallowed. “Anyway, he went fast. I held him at the end so he wasn’t alone. But then…” More tears fell. “But then I was the one who was alone.”

Saul brought Kenneth’s fingers to his lips, kissing them gently before resting their hands in his lap again. “Then Preston came along and he seemed like the answer.”

“Yes. For a few short months, he was.”

“What changed?”

Kenneth felt the weight of that time descend on his shoulders. He’d certainly asked himself the same question a million times over the years.

“I’m sure I’ll never know for sure. And I don’t believe for a second that he suddenly turned into a monster out of nowhere. But with me, I think what may have ignited him was my fond memories of Ronald. It was like he was competing with a dead man. He was always trying to prove to me that he was the better Master, the smarter Master, the harsher Master.”

“Preston’s a fool. He had a lovely submissive boy who would’ve given him everything, yet all he could think about was his own idiotic pride.” Saul squeezed his hand. “To put you at ease, it won’t bother me at all if you want to talk about Ronald. He was a big, important part of your life and I feel I should be thanking him for training you so remarkably well. Preston gets none of that credit.”

“Thank you, Sir. That means a lot to me—all of it. And you’re right. Preston gets none of the credit because he never taught me a thing other than how to be afraid.”

“Good boy. One of your shining traits is your courage and strength.” Saul sipped at his coffee and grimaced. “Ugh. Cold.”

Kenneth was practically out of his chair before Saul yanked him back down.

“Let me get you another, Sir. Please.”

“In a moment, Kenneth. You have a wonderful natural instinct to please that I appreciate very much, but I need you to learn my rhythms and what I need.”

“Of course, Sir. Forgive me.”

“There’s nothing to forgive. We’re in the midst of hashing it all out. Anticipating what I might want at any given moment will work much better farther down the road once you really get to know me. Right now, you’re operating in the dark. Until then, let me direct you.”

Kenneth nodded sheepishly. “It’s so simple. Makes so much more sense.”

“Nothing unknown is ever simple. It has to be revealed before you can understand it.” Saul considered him. “Were you always expected to automatically know what your lovers wanted or needed?”

Kenneth was conflicted. He still didn’t want to think anything bad about Ronald, let alone say it out loud. “Yes, Sir. But I don’t think Ronald did it in a mean way. He was never like that with me.”

“I’m sure he didn’t. Perhaps it was the way he’d learned mastery.” Saul arched his eyebrows. “It’s not as if there’s a university course available.”

Kenneth sputtered out laughter. Saul was incredibly understanding. It gave Kenneth even more comfort that he’d made the right decision to give himself to the man.

“I’m going to assume that your first experience with erotic pain was at Ronald’s hands?”

“Not entirely.”

“Oh?”

“When I was fifteen, a much older man came to stay one summer with one of our neighbors in Chicago. When the neighbor would go to work each day, Art would invite me over. I was bored and he was nice to me.” Kenneth knew he was blushing. He wasn’t very proud of the story and he’d only ever confessed it to Ronald when he’d asked him a similar question. “I also thought he was quite attractive.”

“Go on.”

“Before long, we were having an affair, but I didn’t find out until later that all men didn’t share their desires the way we did.”

“Specifically?”

“He was very rough with me. He’d hold me down, spank me, gag me. Once, he used a wooden ruler on me. It left awful bruises, but I loved it. I begged him for it again. That was when he ended things. He said I was sick, that I should be institutionalized.”

“Dear Kenneth. I’d love to tell you that what happened to you was unusual, but I’m afraid it’s not. Your story is the exact reason I founded the Hampton Road Club.”

“So it’s true what I heard you and Master Aaron discussing on our way out—you’re the real owner of the club?”

“Does that bother you?”

“No, Sir. I think it’s a wonderful thing you’ve done for men like us. You’ve probably helped so many over the years not to feel shame over their urges the way Art did.”

“I certainly hope so. I take it that your affair was the catalyst for you discovering your true nature?”

“Yes, but I despaired of ever finding anyone who would give me what I needed without despising me for it.”

“Until Ronald.”

“Yes. He set me free.”

Saul leaned in then took Kenneth’s mouth in a deep, heated kiss. He tucked his hands underneath Kenneth’s thighs and ass then dragged him onto his lap in the big cushioned patio chair. They embraced and kissed, the moment more about intimacy than arousal. Kenneth sensed they’d moved to the next phase of their union. He was reassured by Saul’s acceptance and understanding of him. That knowledge took him to another place where he was anxious to get his other needs met. He wanted to feel the snap of Saul’s whip on his flesh.

* * * *

“Boy. Look at me. Are you still with me?”

Kenneth’s chest rose and fell rapidly. “Yes, Sir.”

“What do you say to me when you’ve had enough, when you want me to stop what I’m doing to you?”

“I say mercy, Sir. Mercy.”

His breathing slowed, but he didn’t want it to. He’d been in the middle of a glorious rush of pain. It had been a massive adrenaline surge that he swore he could’ve ridden to the ends of the universe. He couldn’t imagine why Saul had stopped.

“Are you ready to cry mercy?”

Kenneth frowned, confused. He was tied spread eagle in a standing position in one of the private rooms. His wrists were restrained by a natural rope that was attached to chains anchored to the ceiling. Large iron rings were bolted to a matching metal base that was anchored to the floor. It was their first time back at the club since Kenneth had moved in with Saul the prior week. That was how he chose to label it. He didn’t want to sully it with anything related to Preston.

“No, Sir. Why would I want to cry mercy?”

Saul reached behind Kenneth and swiped his fingers across the middle of his back. Kenneth jumped and hissed from the sting. When Saul presented the two digits to him, he was shocked to see the blood staining them.

“This is why.” Saul wiped his fingers with a handkerchief. “I’m untying you now so I can tend to your wounds.”

“But…Sir. I didn’t cry mercy.”

“I’m aware of that, boy. Are you defying me?”

Kenneth shook his head vigorously. “No, Sir. Never.”

Saul worked the knots on his wrist, but he leaned into kiss Kenneth’s sweaty temple.

“That’s a good boy.”

Once he had released Kenneth, Saul led him over to a padded table and directed him to lie across it on his stomach. Saul went to a wood cabinet that was similar to the one Kenneth had always retrieved the oil from, then opened the door. He brought back a jar then dug out some sort of paste with his fingers. Saul gingerly spread it across Kenneth’s skin and he bit his lip in an effort to keep from whimpering. He didn’t want Saul to get the wrong idea and never beat him again. He needed it.

Once Saul had finished with the paste, he put it back then brought out something else. As soon as Saul had opened the bottle, he recognized the scent as jasmine. His favorite time of the year in Los Angeles was when the star-shaped white flowers would bloom. The heat would carry the fragrance all across the city and it gave him a sense of calm.

He groaned with pleasure as Saul massaged his shoulders. The tenderness of his touch was in sharp contrast to the brutality of his blows. It was exactly how Kenneth had pictured being Saul’s submissive would be like. Except he still didn’t understand why he’d stopped, when Kenneth hadn’t asked him to.

The oil slicked the way for Saul’s fingers to slide along his skin, loosening his aching muscles that had been pulled taut in their restraints. Saul paid special attention to his overtaxed limbs and avoided his abused back.

“Are you with me still?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“Do you feel everything I’m doing to you?”

He was back to being confused. “Yes. Absolutely, Sir.”

Saul kept soothing with his hands. He was no longer massaging, but stroking, caressing.

“Did you feel everything my whip did to you?”

“Yes, Sir. I did.”

“How many lashes did I give you?”

“I…”

His breath caught in his throat. He hadn’t the faintest idea. It could’ve been ten or it could’ve been a hundred. Ronald had taught him that it was okay to drift off as the pain enveloped him. He’d said it was like the breaker in the ocean—once he got past that point, he’d be all right. He’d float away.

When Preston had been the one to inflict the pain, Kenneth had learned to immediately force himself into that state as protection against the agony that Preston always thrust on him. He’d never build up to anything. He would tear into him right away. The vitriol he’d hurl at him ruined any pleasure he could’ve gotten from the act. It had been easier to simply retreat into his head.

“You have no idea then?”

“I-I’m sorry, Sir. I don’t.”

Tears filled his eyes as the certainty came over him that Preston had ruined one of the main things he’d always enjoyed. Kenneth had assumed that once he was with Saul, he would immediately fall back into the way it had been when he’d been lovingly beaten by Ronald.

“It’s going to be all right, dear Kenneth.” Saul kissed the back of his neck, licked behind his ear, then nibbled on the lobe. He never stilled his hands as he loved on him. “You told me you enjoy having your cock punished, your sac?”

“Yes, Sir, I do.” He frowned again, frustration overtaking him. “At least, I did at one time.” His tone had been hostile and he immediately regretted it. He waited for a reprimand that never came.

“There, there. Do you trust me?”

“God, yes.” His voice hitched as a sob poured out. “I do, Sir.”

“Good boy. Let’s get you cleaned up. I’ll be applying some bandages to the one spot on your back that opened up, then we’ll be going to the ballroom for a demonstration. I’ll tell Aaron to let everyone know.”

“I don’t want anyone to think you mistreated me.”

“Hush now. You said you trusted me.”

Saul had been helping him to sit up and he bowed his head. It was rare that Saul ever requested that he keep his gaze lowered. It had only been when he was specifically working with him on something. He’d also explained that he might ask for it at the club at times when they were mingling with the others. Other than that, he’d told Kenneth that he’d rather see his beautiful eyes.

“Lift your head so I can see you.”

He did as he’d been told. There’d been no time to hide his shame.

“There now. I’m not disappointed in you and we’re going to reclaim your pleasure together. That belongs to you and you belong to me. Therefore, I want my pleasure back too.”

Kenneth’s lip quivered. All he wanted was Saul. “Sir, I need your kiss. Please.”

Saul cupped the back of his head then pulled him close. He opened up for his lover immediately, and they tangled their tongues, tasting and licking. Saul captured Kenneth’s bottom lip between his teeth and tugged on it, scraping it then demanding entrance to his mouth with his tongue once more.