The Scarlet Thread (12 page)

He asked their names and checked his list before nodding them

through. Other cars were already parked: two Cadillacs, three

Mercedes, and a little red sports car the likes of which Sierra had

never seen before. Everything reeked of money.

Sierra walked Carolyn to the front door, where a maid answered their ring. She was Spanish and dressed in a crisp black

uniform with white collar and apron.

Carolyn’s hand tightened. “Don’t leave, Mommy. Please.” Sierra forced a reassuring smile, but her daughter didn’t loosen her

grip until they entered a huge room with cathedral windows at

the back and she spotted Pamela with several other little girls.

Sierra spotted the mothers.

They were all standing near windows that provided a panoramic view of San Fernando Valley. Every one of the ladies

looked as though she had just stepped out of a fashion magazine.

Sierra cringed inwardly, wondering what they thought of her in

her faded teal sweat tunic, black leggings, and scuffed Reeboks.

Oh, God,
she thought,
please don’t let Carolyn be embarrassed by me.

One of the women glanced toward Sierra and Carolyn. Smiling,

she said a word to the others and left them.

“You must be Sierra and Carolyn Madrid,” she said, her tone

warm and welcoming. “I’m so glad you could come.” She

touched Carolyn’s hair lightly. “Pamela has talked of little else

since you came to school, Carolyn. She insists you’re kindred

spirits just like the girls in
Anne of Green Gables.”

Marcia Burton had class and grace and dissolved every bit of

Carolyn’s shyness. Smiling, the little girl held the present out to

Marcia. “Why, it’s perfectly lovely,” she said.

“My mother wrapped it,” Carolyn told her proudly, and Sierra’s

face went hot. She could see the other gifts on the polished mahogany coffee table nearby, all obviously from expensive stores and

professionally wrapped. She thought of the wooden box and

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cheap, gawdy jewelry inside it. She wished she could snatch it

back and run.

As Carolyn joined the other children, Sierra thanked Marcia

for inviting her and made her excuses to leave.

“Oh, please stay,” Marcia said, sounding as though she actually meant it. “Pamela said your son plays on the school’s baseball team, and I know they’re practicing today.”

She was right. Sierra had dropped Clanton off before bringing

Carolyn to the party. The coach had invited all the boys back to

his house for a barbecue and movie.

Marcia smiled, her blue eyes amused as she confided her belief

that Pamela had developed a crush on Clanton. “She says he’s

the most handsome boy in school.”

Sierra wasn’t surprised her son made female hearts flutter.

Clanton had Alex’s features and coloring, and her light green

eyes. It made for a startling combination that had always

attracted attention from the time he was a baby.

“I really had better go,” Sierra said.

“At least stay long enough to meet the other mothers.”

As Marcia Burton put her hand lightly beneath her elbow,

Sierra resigned herself to further humiliation.

All the ladies were polite. Only one looked her over as though

she were convinced Sierra had just crawled out of a homeless

shelter. Marcia, appearing not to notice, remained warm and

friendly to all, while staying close to Sierra’s side.

But the woman’s efforts did little to ease Sierra’s discomfiture.

After what seemed a polite interval of stilted small talk, she made

her excuses and left.

She breathed far easier after driving out the gate and heading

down the winding road out of the rarefied air of the Studio City

hills to the bank of smog in the flatlands of North Hollywood.

One thing was certain: She wouldn’t step foot over the threshold

when she returned to pick up Carolyn.

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had an afternoon free, and they were going to spend it together.

When he had asked her if she’d like to do so, quick tears of gratitude had sprung to her eyes. It had been so long since they’d

really been together, just the two of them. Maybe this would be

a chance for them to bridge the chasm that had developed

between them. Sierra wasn’t sure if they could, but she wanted

to. Oh, how she wanted to.

When she unlocked the door and went inside, she felt almost

lighthearted. “Alex? I’m home,” she called.

Silence met her.

“Alex?” she said again, going into the kitchen. The room was

empty, but there was a note on the refrigerator. Cold fingers of

disappointment closed around her heart as she moved forward

and took it down.

Sierra,

Steve called. A big client is in town unexpectedly, so

we’re taking him out to dinner. I’ll probably be home late.

That was it. I’m gone, I’ll be home late. No apology. No regret

at not being able to spend time with her.

Angry, Sierra crumpled up the note and tossed it into the garbage. She vacuumed, dusted, and made preparations for dinner

for three. She considered changing her clothes before going back

to pick up Carolyn, and then rebelled against the idea. She was

who she was. Besides, even dressed up she wouldn’t fit in with

that crowd.

Steeling herself, she headed back to Studio City. As she pulled

up before the palatial house, she saw that all the cars were exactly

where they were when she had left three hours before. Apparently, they had all stayed through the entire party, sharing the

catered hors d’oeuvres and luncheon and the beautifully deco8 6

rated cake, and enjoying the magician who had come to make

sure the children were properly entertained. She got out of her

car as several of the women and their little girls came out, each

child holding a bag of party favors.

“Our girls are playing in the family room,” Marcia said, greeting her at the front door.

“I’m sorry if I’m late.”

“You’re not late at all. Come in, please. Would you like some

coffee?”

“Thank you, but I’d better not. I’m in something of a rush. I

need to pick up Clanton soon.”

Marcia’s expression flickered with understanding and disappointment; it was an excuse, and both women knew it. “I’ll show

you the way,” she said quietly. “Pamela loved the treasure box

and scarf.”

Polite to the end, Sierra thought sarcastically, then felt a

twinge of shame for her critical attitude.
Shrew,
she chastised herself.
Marcia’s shown you nothing but kindness. But then, maybe you

don’t know how to react to kindness anymore. . . .

The girls were leaning close together and talking like little

conspirators. To Sierra’s surprise and pleasure, Pamela was

bedecked in the scarf and jewelry. Carolyn laughed happily at

what her friend was saying and then noticed her. “Oh,

Mommy,” she said, obviously disappointed. “Couldn’t I stay a

while longer? Please?”

“We have to go, Carolyn.”

“Clanton’s staying at—”

“Now,
Carolyn.”

Carolyn rose obediently. Remembering her manners, she

thanked Pamela and her mother for the lovely time and for the

bag of party favors and treats.

“Why don’t we get together sometime?” Marcia said as they

walked back upstairs.

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response. She knew sometime meant never. The girls were talking again and going ahead of them out the front door, obviously

trying to find another way to delay the inevitable.

“Are you free Monday?” Marcia said.

Startled, Sierra looked at her. “Monday?”

“For coffee,” Marcia said and smiled. “Or tea. Or water. I

don’t care.” She laughed at Sierra’s look, then reached out and

squeezed her wrist gently. “What I really want to do is get to

know you better.”

She spoke so sincerely, Sierra didn’t doubt her. Quick tears

burned her eyes, and she wondered that a casual invitation for

coffee could affect her so deeply.

“Monday sounds perfect.”

Mister Grayson cum over today, mad as a grizly.

He said Matthew is going to marry Sally Mae

or he is going to shoot him dead. Papa said no son

of his is going to marry a harlot. Matthew said

Sally Mae is no harlot and they are already married in the eyes of God.

Lucas laughed and called Matthew a fool.

Matthew hit him in the mouth and nocked him

down. He got on top of him and kept pounding

until Papa pulled him off.

Mama has not stopped crying for two days.

Papa said Mister Grayson is sending a rider

around to tell every one who comes to camp

meeting that his daughter is getting married to

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Matthew Benjamin McMurray. Papa said he is

actin proud about it.

Mama said some people have no sense of shame.

Matthew married Sally Mae today. She wore her

dead mother’s white wedding dress. I have never

seen Matthew look as happy as he did when he

put Mama’s ring on her finger.

Sally Mae almost did not have a ring at all.

Papa wud not let Matthew have Grandmama

McMurray’s ring. I heard Papa and Matthew

yellin at each other in the barn. Matthew said he

loves Sally Mae. Papa said no one like Sally Mae

was ever going to wear his mother’s ring. He said

he wuz sorry he listened to Mama. He said he

shud have taken Matthew to Fever River a long

time ago to let him larn some facts of life about

women and then maybe he wud not have fallen

prey to one.

So Mama give Matthew her own wedding ring.

Papa has not said a word to her since.

I wonder if James is still in Fever River and

what he’s doing there.

I got no time for writing in this journal, but it is

the only place I can put down my feelings. And

such feelings! Sometimes I think I will burst.

Mama is sick, bad sick. Sally Mae dont do nothing to help. She and Matt fight all the time. Or

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the taking. She says she is bored with her life and

bored with him. All he does is work in the fields

beside Papa and does nothing fun with her. Sometimes I hate her so much I wish her dead. Then she

cries and tells me she loves Matthew and wants to

be a good wife and I feel guilty. She just dont

know how to be good cause she never had a mama

like mine who wud not let her be anythin else.

Mama coughed up blood today. I dont know

what to do. Papa dont spend much time with her

because he cries every time he does. He said he

can’t bear to see her suffering. He told her he

dont know what to do without her. He dont

believe in God. He dont believe in nothing but

what he can do for himself and he can’t do nuthin

for Mama.

Mama said today she is not afraid to die and

I shud not be afraid to let her. She smiles when

I sit with her. She says she is getting closer to

God every minute. I tell her we need her more

than God does, but she says maybe she is in the

way. In the way of what I asked, but she coughed

so long and hard she had no strength to tell me.

Mama died today. She said she could smell the

lilacs through the window. She wanted to hold

some. So I went outside and cut some for her.

When I came back, she was dead.

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