The Secret (15 page)

Episode 16: Right

I knew I had to tell him. Guilt pressed down on my chest like one of those machines in a medieval torture chamber—slowly squashing the life out of me.

Killing the Jeep’s engine in front of the warehouse, I sat there—hating myself. I was in no hurry to go inside. I shivered and sipped some of the hot chocolate I’d picked up at a gas station on the way out here. Mr. Drake’s car wasn’t here yet. Why had I consented to a Saturday morning training session, anyway?

I put my head back against the driver’s seat, hoping the ibuprofen that I had taken before leaving the apartment would start to kick in soon. I knew that things were rough for Jake right now. And I was about to make it worse.

In response to Sam’s ‘prom ultimatum’ I’d locked myself in my room and painted until around three in the morning. Normally, a painting binge left me slightly exhausted, but very satisfied. But not today.

My dreams had been restless: images of my parents in our paisley-walled kitchen dancing slowly to classical music; Dr. Luth’s silver hair flashing brightly against the firelight in the cave; crimson blood pouring out of Stewart’s fingertips—the scenes weaved a pattern through my mind. And none of it made sense. This aching feeling was plaguing me. The same kind of feeling I had right after my father died. Something wasn’t right—something more than this whole Sam thing—but I couldn’t see it.

I closed my eyes and tried to think of something tranquil.

Pounding reverberated through the Jeep.

Jerking back, I looked up into Reed’s face—smashed against the driver’s side glass. He moved his tongue to the window and made a loud farting sound. “‘Sup!”

The pressure on my chest eased up a bit at Reed’s antics. I hit the window and laughed. “You’re disgusting.”

Reed opened the door and took the hot chocolate out of my hands, guzzling it down and wiping his face with the back of his hand. “I’ve been thinking of some cool stuff we haven’t tried yet with your powers. I think we have a few minutes before Mr. Drake gets here and starts makin’ us do all the mind crap. C’mon.”

I got out of the Jeep, steeling myself for the confrontation that was inevitable. I looked up at the door at the top of the deck steps, wondering where Jake was. “I’m not feeling very good. I don’t need to be here—do I? I have my powers, why does he need me?”

Giving me a confused look, Reed raised an eyebrow. “Sure—you think you can ditch us when you don’t need us?” He shoved me gently. “What’s the matter with you?”

I ignored him.

He held the front door open and whispered to me as I walked past him. “Jake has been in an even worse mood since you started ignoring his calls, by the way.”

The smell of pancakes assaulted me and I felt my stomach growl. I couldn’t remember the last time I’d eaten. Peeking around the room, I walked slowly into the kitchen. “Where is everybody?”

Reed handed me the empty cup of hot chocolate and dashed down the hall. “Gotta pee.”

Sam stood up from behind the counter, donning a white apron. His hair was wet, but his green eyes looked calm and rested. He was holding a small bag of flour. “
Everybody
is right here.”

My heart started racing and my mouth went dry.

Sam held my gaze for a moment, a smile playing at the edges of his lips. He opened the flour and dumped some in a bowl. “Problems sleeping?”

I moved closer to the counter. “What do you want from me, Sam?”

Pouring some milk into the batter, he started whisking. “Have some pancakes, I’m making more.”

I leaned over the counter. “Why do you want to take me to prom?”

Sam looked up at me. His eyes were serious and I could smell the coconut tanning lotion scent on him. “You’ve made your decision, then?”

I bit the inside of my lip. “I’m doing this for my mom—not because I like you.”

Reed rushed back into the kitchen, picking up a plate. “Sit down, Lanie. You don’t look very good. Let’s get some food in you.”

I sat down, but looked at Sam. “I don’t want any. I’m on a diet.”

Reed put the plate of food in front of me, then another plate in front of the chair next to me, before taking a seat. He smothered his pancake with syrup. “Pshh, diet? Look at you—you don’t need a diet. You need to eat. And it will help you focus for training.”

Sam laughed under his breath. The kind of laugh that sounded carefree and light, but I heard the annoyance in it. “Oh—it doesn’t seem right, does it? To only eat
bland
, diet food? You need something
sweet.
”

Anger burned inside of me. Was he saying that Jake was bland?

“Lanie?” Rubbing his eyes, Jake walked into the kitchen. He was wearing blue pajama pants and a white tank top that emphasized the definition in his arms. His hair was matted in different places and there were dark circles under his eyes.

I stood, moving to him. “Jake—”

Putting his hands on my shoulders, he searched my eyes with a look of concern. “I was worried when I didn’t hear from you.”

Marsha and Karen walked into the kitchen.

Marsha grunted and picked up a plate, giving Jake and me a disgusted look. “Good thing you could spend the entire evening covering for her.”

Alarm pulsed through me. “What?”

“Freak, Marsha—you make it sound like she didn’t save your life.” Reed pulled my plate over to him and looked at me. “So, you don’t want this?”

I shook my head and turned back to Jake. “What happened?”

Jake frowned. “Let’s go talk in my room.”

“We’ll save some yummy pancakes for you, Lanie,” Sam yelled after us.

An annoyed pang went through me at Sam’s taunting. But I turned my focus on Jake, following him across the living room and toward the loft. He kept my hand in his as we ascended the stairs. I’d never been to his room before and it kind of made me nervous.

I stopped at the top of the stairs, hedging. There was a little alcove with another flat screen TV and a sectional couch. “Are you sure I should be coming up here?”

Jake stopped too, turning back to me. “What’s wrong?”

I pulled away from him, moving to the balcony and looking down on the living room and the large windows that opened to the stream and the mountain. How did I explain to him that my whole life my parents had ingrained in me that there were certain standards to live by; one of them being that I didn’t go into a boy’s room alone? It seemed stupid—but it just didn’t feel right. “Umm, can we just talk out here? What happened with the police, Jake?”

Jake picked up a lock of my hair and softly twisted it, running it between his fingers.

My heart clutched in pain. How would I tell him I was going to prom with Sam?

“Lanie—no, it’s…it was fine. Reed and I went up to the cave with the police and showed them where we had the bonfire and ‘party.’” He let his breath out. “And there were the questions about what we saw and we pretty much just stuck to the story that we were just there to have a good time.” He shrugged. “Then they interviewed everyone. Officer Boyle said he would get to you and Rob and Mr. Drake today.”

“And?” I could tell there was something he wasn’t telling me.

He moved his hand from my hair to my shoulder and squeezed tightly. “I had this dream last night, Lanie.”

I didn’t move, but I felt my heart skip a beat.

“In the dream, you were yelling out for me, but I couldn’t get to you. And the faster I ran toward you, the farther away your voice got.” He brushed his lips to my forehead in a protective gesture.

“I’m here, Jake. I’m here.”

His breath went ragged.

“What else, Jake?”

Jake swallowed. “And then…I was in this room with all these mirrors, and everywhere I stepped all I could see was a reflection of myself. I started smashing the mirrors so I could figure out which one was real and which one was a way out…and then I saw him…”

I was confused. “What? Who? Who did you see?”

Jake closed his eyes. “Luth. All I could see in the mirror was a reflection of him.” Opening his bloodshot eyes again, a tear fell onto his cheek. “I found a birth certificate. After he told me that I was his son, I spent a few days digging through more of my mother’s boxes. And I found a birth certificate that lists S. Luth as my father.”

Staring into his eyes, I didn’t want to let him go. I wanted to take some of his pain inside of me and hold onto it.

The front door shut and I could hear Mr. Drake’s voice downstairs.

Jake wiped his face, leaning back. “We’ve got to get down there.”

Reaching up on my tip toes, I put my hands on his shoulders, pulling him to me. “You’re not him, Jake. You’re not.”

Jake pulled back. “That’s what I keep telling myself. But sometimes there’s no fighting what’s true—is there?”

His question scared me a little bit and I frowned.

He looked at my lips and leaned forward. “I don’t know what I would do without you, Lanie. Do you know that?”

It felt wrong to kiss him. Like I was taking advantage of the fact that he didn’t know I was about to betray him. But I couldn’t stop myself.

Our lips touched and the familiar electricity pulsed inside of me. He pulled me closer to him and I felt that little corner of myself—the part that no one but him has ever seen—come alive.

I wasn’t betraying him. My heart was his. And this was the most right thing that I had to hold on to at the moment.

“Where is she?” Marsha’s voice raged through the warehouse.

Pulling away from Jake, I kissed him one more time quickly on the cheek. She had to know. Sam must have told her. “I’m sorry, Jake. I can’t explain—but it’s…I’m sorry.”

I turned for the stairs.

“Lanie!” Marsha stalked into the living room. “You—”

I kept my face hard as I went down the stairs. “
He
asked
me
.”

Marsha ran full force at me, roaring, “I HATE you!” Then, dropping her head, she plowed into me.

Screaming pain went through my back as I went into the wall and felt the statue that had been sitting on the side table gouge me. “Ouch!”

Before I knew what was happening, I sent her body flying across the room onto the wicker couches.

“Don’t hurt her.” Reed was immediately beside her.

Jake rushed down the stairs. “Lanie!”

I rolled over, gasping in pain.

Mr. Drake came forward, his eyes looking dangerously sharpened by my display of power. “What is going on?”

Letting Jake help me up, I didn’t say anything.

Marsha huffed loudly, leaning on Reed to stand. She pointed at me. “She’s going to take everything!”

Mr. Drake looked suspiciously between us.

Marsha turned her glare to Sam. “How could you?”

Pursing his lips, he looked down. “You don’t understand.”

Reed tried to take both of her hands in his. “Baby—I’ll take ya to prom.” His eyes looked pleading. “It’s only right I take you to prom anyway—you can’t go with your brother.”

As she shook herself loose, tears moistened the corners of her eyes. Raising her chin in the air, she started down the hall. “Don’t talk to me—any of you.”

Jake didn’t move and his face held confusion. “Are you going to prom with Sam?”

Feeling like I’d been caught with my hand in the cookie jar, I nodded, not wanting to say it out loud.

Jake stepped back from me, a look of pain washing over him.

“Jake—” What could I say? “I’m sorry.”

Pushing past me, he went for the kitchen. “I’m going out,” he said, taking his keys off the tiny key hooks attached to the wall and slamming the kitchen door shut behind him as he left.

Sam met my eyes, lifting his eyebrows and then turning down the hall toward Marsha’s room.

Karen shrugged, starting back into the kitchen. “Drama.”

Mr. Drake sat on one of the plush, beige couches and looked out the window. “This is so…incredible—it’s like I’m repeating history.”

I moved to him, rubbing my back and watching Jake’s Mustang peel down the driveway. I wished I could tell him—but deep down I knew that Sam took his threats seriously. He wouldn’t help me unless I kept up my end of the bargain. “What are you talking about?”

Mr. Drake sighed. “The first fight your father and Nicholi had—was over your mother.”

Episode 17: Change

“Character arc is one of the most important components in a good work of fiction. People must change. Remember that when you analyze character development, static characters won’t capture the hearts of the readers.” Mr. Drake drummed his fingers on the podium at the front of the class, avoiding my gaze.

The bell rang and Mr. Drake waved his hand in dismissal. “See you tomorrow.”

Jake bolted from his seat without a glance in my direction.

I closed my eyes for a second, trying to put up a wall against the sting of the silent fury that had been coming off of him since yesterday. I just needed to get through the next four days until prom. Then I would tell him everything.

Staying in my seat, I heard Mr. Drake approach. His voice was quiet. “I told you—I’m not talking about it.”

Opening my eyes, I pushed down the urge to slam my fist into the desk. “Then why did you talk about it yesterday?”

Pulling off his glasses, Mr. Drake sighed. “I shouldn’t have.”

I didn’t move. “Don’t you think it’s too late for that, I mean…really?”

“I don’t feel comfortable telling your parents’ secrets. I don’t think it’s ever too late to try to guard other people’s privacy—do you?”