The She-Hulk Diaries (27 page)

Read The She-Hulk Diaries Online

Authors: Marta Acosta

Tags: #Fiction / Humorous, #Fiction / Action & Adventure, #Fiction / Contemporary Women

BOOK: The She-Hulk Diaries
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ME:
Oh, we both went to watch
Game of Thrones
at a sports bar, but it was too loud and rowdy so we went somewhere quieter and talked and got to know each other.
ASL:
I can’t imagine him at a sports bar, because those guys always have such crude pickup lines. I’m glad you met him though!
ME:
Me, too. Do you mind if I get your feedback on something?
ASL:
At your service.

I described the ookiness I felt about Joocey Jooce and the many associations, including the recent hostage situation at a Joocey Jooce shop.

ME:
Do you think I’m being too cynical?
ASL:
Jennifer, if you were cynical, you wouldn’t have dated men like Tony Stark.
ME:
In my defense, Ironman is an interplanetary hero.
ASL:
But Tony as a boyfriend? Not so heroic. Joocey Jooce is ubiquitous. It’s inevitable that they’d show up in incidents in a way that appears disproportionate.
ME:
One of my friends told me the same thing. So I’m overreacting?
ASL:
I didn’t say that, but your pals at the Mansion lab would have discovered any behavior-altering substances—not that I mind New Yorkers being more polite. In fact, if there
is
an altering agent, I’d like to dose my coworkers with it.
ME:
Amy, I’m not an HR specialist, but I’m pretty sure there’s a law against that.
ASL:
There is, and now I deeply regret helping write it when I interned for the state legislature. I’ll keep an ear out for anything about Joocey Jooce. Will you be at the next Forestiers workshop? We’re making weapons.

My foam and PVC broadsword was falling apart and my shield was dinged up, so I told her I’d see her there.

MARCH 30

I blocked out two hours today to visit Mavis for story time. I’d dressed in jeans and flat shoes to be less giantish.

Mavis was sitting up, and her hair was neatly braided and tied with a red ribbon. “You came! You came!”

“I promised you I would, sweetie. How are you feeling today?” I snuck a look at Mrs. Bertoli, who smiled.

“Today she’s good, and she really has fun at story time. You will, too.”

“I like stories.” I reached into my satchel and brought out a wrapped book. “This is for you, Mavis.”

Mavis turned the gift until she found the tape. She carefully slid her finger beneath the ribbon and began wiggling it off. “The ribbon’s pretty.”

“We’ll save that and the paper, too,” her mother said.

When Mavis opened the book, she held it carefully.

“It’s
The Island of the Blue Dolphins
and it was one of my favorite books when I was about your age. It’s about a very brave girl who has to fight to survive. She’s afraid and lonely, but she’s a hero. It’s all yours, Mavis, so if you spill something on it or bend a page, it’s okay. It means the book has been read and loved.”

She still didn’t look very excited, so I rifled through my handbag and found a small spiral notepad that I’d planned to give to Ruth. “Here, this is for you, too. You can draw pictures in it.”

She took the notepad and said, “It’s got a kitten on it!”

“Kittens always make me happy. What about you?”

“I love kittens,” she said with a big smile, and a volunteer came into the room and announced that story time was about to start.

Mrs. Bertoli seemed so tired that I offered to take Mavis. I also wanted to see the child away from her mom’s anxiety and sorrow.

The volunteer showed me the proper way to lift Mavis into a wheelchair, and we went down the speckled blue linoleum hall, our shoes squeaking on the shiny surface. “Eek, eek, eek, I’m making mouse sounds,” I said.

“You’re a giant
and
a mouse,” Mavis said.

“Maybe I’m a giant mouse.”

A few other children were coming out of their rooms, and soon their high, clear voices filled the air.

I rolled Mavis’s wheelchair into the community room, and she pointed me to a space at the front. “This is the best place,” she said. “Here’s Dr. Kate!”

A pretty pear-shaped young woman came into the room and sat on top of a table at the front. She was wearing a white lab coat with a huge DR. KATE name tag in the shape of a pinwheel lollipop. She had shining brown hair pulled back into a ponytail, rosy cheeks, and big hazel eyes. She seemed very familiar, and I wondered if I’d met her somewhere before.

She glanced at the clock and hopped off the table. Cupping her hands like a megaphone, she called, “Hellooo, children!”

The kids all called back, “Helloooo, Dr. Kate!”

“How many of you can read the clock?”

Several children raised their arms and said, “Me, me!”

“Ramon, what time is it?”

A boy said, “Five minutes after ten o’clock.”

“That’s right, so my brother, Mr. Biggie, is five whole minutes late. I see that Mavis has a guest today.” Kate smiled toward me. “Would you like to help read our story?”

Mavis peered up at me. I didn’t want to disappoint her, so I said, “Okay.”

“And your name is?”

“I’m Jenny.”

“Thanks for helping, Jenny. We’re reading
The Once and Future King
, and we’re on book one,
The Sword in the Stone
.” Dr. Kate picked up a book from the desk, opened it at the bookmark, and handed it to me.

“I love this story!”

“So does my brother. Who is
supposed
to be here.”

Mavis said to me, “He’s the giant!”

“He probably had a giant emergency then. Maybe the shoelaces on his giant shoes broke and he needed to find a long rope to replace them,” I said, and the kids laughed, which made me feel pretty swell. I’ve never thought of myself as funny, but maybe I’ve always had the wrong audience.

I opened the book, and the kids looked interested, except for a sullen older boy at the back, who was about thirteen. He had dull brown skin, no muscle tone, and no hair or eyebrows. I wondered how sick he was. I smiled when our eyes met, but he looked away.

I began reading, and the kids became so engrossed that I added a little more drama and gestures that I’d learned in my LARP class. I think I did an OMG! amazing Merlin, and my young Arthur was pretty good, too. Even the older boy started paying attention.

I got lost in the story and kept turning the pages. My throat became dry, and I reached for a bottle of water on the table and took a big swig. That’s when I noticed that things had changed in the room. Big things, i.e., Ellis Tesla, who was standing at the back of the room beside Dr. Kate and watching me.

I spit out the water.

The kids burst into laughter and my face went hot. I swiped at the water dribbling down my shirt.

Kate came forward, saying, “Thank you so much, Jenny, for that wonderful reading! Kids, wasn’t Jenny terrific?”

When the children clapped and cheered, I got that warm fuzzy feeling, which was muddled with my embarrassment. I realized that Mr. Biggie was Mr. Big E. Duh.

“Well, kids, that’s our story time this week,” Dr. Kate said. “Next week, I hope that Mr. Big E will be on time, because we’re doing our art project.” She shot a look at Ellis, and he smiled apologetically. He was wearing a navy-blue wool sweater under a brown corduroy jacket and jeans, which was totally sexy in a lumberjack professor way.

“We want Jenny, too!” a little girl chirped. “We like Jenny.”

“Maybe Jenny can come back, and she and Mr. Big E can read together,” Kate said.

Ellis’s expression froze, and Kate grinned at him and said, “Yes, that would be best, for both of them to read and help us with our art project together. Right, kids?”

The children cheered again, and then the adults began taking them out of the community room. I went back to Mavis in her wheelchair.

She beamed at me. “You read real good, Jenny. Do you want to meet my friends?”

As Mavis introduced me to other children, I peeked and saw Ellis holding a toddler in his arms while talking to the older boy. Another child leaned happily against Ellis’s legs.

Mavis sighed, and I saw her head drooping. “Time for you to get some rest, Mavis,” I said.

Mrs. Bertoli came through the crowd and said, “I’ll take her back, Ms. Walters. Thanks for spending so much time with her.”

“Jenny, please. It was my pleasure.”

“You promise to come to next story time, right, Jenny?” Mavis said.

“I’m absolutely positively going to try, but I have a lot of work to do.”

“But it’s our art project. We’re making things from the story. Try, okay?”

I nodded and bent to kiss her cheek.

Before I could leave, Kate touched my arm. “You read wonderfully, Jenny, with so much excitement. You should meet my brother. Ellis! E, come here.”

Ellis looked huge in the room with its child-size furniture, giving me some perspective on what She-Hulk would look like to these kids. He put his hand on the older boy’s shoulder and said something to him—probably “Hide me!”—before coming forward and lifting his hand as a greeting.

I tried to smile, but my facial muscles seemed to spasm.

Kate said. “Ellis, this is Jenny. Thank her for saving your ass today with the kids.”

“I had an emergency,” he said.

“A flat tire is not an emergency,” she said so sharply that he stood a
little straighter. “Cardiac arrest is an emergency. Septic poisoning is an emergency. You haven’t thanked Jenny or said hello.”

“It’s not necessary…” I began.

Ellis glanced at Kate and said, “We’ve met before. Jennifer is Dad’s new hire at QUIRC. She’s on the ReplaceMax suit.”

“That’s why I was here with Mavis,” I told Kate. “I’m Jennifer Walters.”

Ellis and I were quiet for only a second as his sister looked at us, and then an expression came on her face like that of someone figuring out a missing word in a crossword puzzle. “
You’re
the new hire that Dad’s been bragging about? The one who’ll be working with Amber and… and you have
such amazing
green eyes.”

Then she gave Ellis a satisfied look before saying to me, “How very very nice to meet you. Well, I’ve got rounds. Ellis, you still haven’t thanked Jenny for
anything
. At least buy her a cup of coffee at the corner cafe, where it’s better.”

“Oh, I have to get back to the office,” I said.

Kate glared at her brother. “See, you make terrible impressions on women. That’s why they hate you.”

“I don’t hate him!” I said quickly.

“Kate is teasing, aren’t you, sis?” Ellis said.

“Sure, why not? Little bro, I expect you to be on time next week. Jenny, the kids would love it if you came back.” Kate’s phone beeped, and she looked at it and said, “Really nice to meet you, Jenny!” and then she wove her way through the wheelchairs and out of the room.

I tried to leave, but there was a traffic jam at the doorway, and Ellis and I got stuck behind the kids and parents. Then we were alone in the room.

He glanced at me, and I tried not to stare at his face, his mouth, his wide shoulders, the line of his throat. He finally said, “You read the story very well.”

“Do you mean, for a groupie who sells out for filthy lucre?” I snapped before I could stop myself. “Because your sister obviously knows who I am.”

“I didn’t tell her anything.” He gave me a brief nod of the noggin and left the room.

I said, “Jackass,” under my breath, and he paused, so I guess he heard me, and I was so turmoiled up that I didn’t care, even though I never act that way.

I was fuming when I went to the elevator—where Ellis was standing. I tried to think of a reason for turning around and leaving, but the elevator
bing
ed and the doors slid open. A couple of staffers in scrubs got out, and Ellis stood aside to let me step in first. He got in and moved to the far side from me.

I always advise my clients, “If you’re in a difficult dispute that has become personal, take a breath, regroup, and come back with a fresh attitude so that you can think clearly.”

I said, “Ellis, pursuant to our discussion at the Valentine’s Day party, I would like to propose that we dispense with the past and treat each other civilly.”

He turned his dark eyes on me and asked, “That’s what you want?”

“I think that would be best, unless you have any objections.”

“We’re not in court,” he said. “Fine, if that’s what
you
want.”

“I didn’t say it’s what
I
wanted. Tell me what
you
want.” This was the wrong move, because he got a strange look in his eye, opened his mouth… and then closed it again and nodded.

Another floor
ping
ed down and he stared ahead and said, “If you are going back to QUIRC, I can give you a lift.”

“It isn’t necessary.”

“I’m going there to have lunch with my father.”

I’d already lost too much time from work. “If you’re going there anyway.”

His car was parked in the basement garage. I sighed as I gazed at the Chevy Chevelle, painted in gleaming green with white racing stripes, and chrome so flawless that I could have used it as a mirror. “A sixty-six Super Sport?” I whispered.

“Yes, not only green on the outside, but I modified it so she runs clean and green, too. Hell, she practically flies. You know your rides.”

“I like muscle cars.” So did Shulky, and we always felt exhilarated getting behind the wheel of a Detroit beast and putting pedal to the metal. I walked around the car, opening and clenching my hands. The front fenders angled ahead as if the car was about to leap forward. “She’s a beaut.”

It was only when Ellis opened the passenger door for me that I realized I was standing expectantly on the driver’s side. “You’re shotgun,” he said.

He got in and started the car, and the Clash blasted out of the sound system. I wondered if he was looking for trouble by offering the ride, or if I wanted it by accepting. Ellis switched off the music, and now I could hear the rumble of the engine.

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