The Silverwing's Sorceress: THe Shadow Slayers, Book 2.5 (11 page)

Her chin quivering, Abbey closed her eyes when he drew the blade across his palm. He cut deeply, wanting to ensure that once it had begun, the flow of blood would continue long enough to cover the entire symbol before he started to heal.

He dripped the blood on the deep tracks etched into Abbey’s skin. And when his blood slowed, he pulled at the edges of his wound, opening it up again and continuing the steady flow until every inch of the brand was covered.

By the time he was done, Abbey’s shaking had transformed into full-blown tremors. Frowning, he closed his bloody fist and put his other hand to her cheek. “It’s all right, dove. It’s finished.” She didn’t answer. “Abigail…you can open your eyes now.”

Her eyes shot open, and she let out a deafening wail, grasping at her bloody stomach and bending double. Her guttural groans and the wild look in her eyes made his heart stutter in his chest. “Abbey?” He grabbed her upper arms and frantically searched her face. “Abbey!”

But when her eyes rolled back in their sockets and foamy saliva spewed from the corners of her mouth, he knew he’d made a terrible mistake.

“Abigail! Wake up!” he cried, his limbs going numb from the shock of seeing the woman he loved seizing before his eyes.

She gasped as though choking, and a fine spray of foam let loose from her lungs. He snatched her up from the floor and carried her to the shower, turning the water on high and jumping in while it was still cold. Too concerned with the blood to worry if the temperature would jolt her, he held her limp body up to the spray, flushing his blood from her wound as if it were acid. And maybe for a witch it was…

“Damn me!” he screamed, the frigid water drenching him head to toe. “Damn me to hell!”

He rinsed and rinsed, reaching up to adjust the water a minute later so it wouldn’t burn her. And then he sat down on the floor of the shower with Abbey stretched out on his lap and simply held her as the water washed every last trace of his blood away.

Her breathing was so faint when he turned her face away from the spray that he couldn’t be sure she still drew breath. He felt for the pulse at her neck, but to his horror, the weak tick at the artery along her throat continued to slow until at last, everything went still and silent.

“No.” He quickly shut off the shower faucet and carried her drenched body to the center of the bathroom. There, with her sprawled on the mat, he pressed his fingers to her throat and his ear to her chest. And what he heard was the worst sound he could imagine. Silence.

“No!” he cried. The stunning olive-green eyes that had been rolling in their sockets just minutes before, now stared out, unblinking.

He began to compress the ribs over her heart and breathe into her lungs. He wasn’t sure how long it went on like that. But if he hadn’t felt like he was desecrating her beautiful body, he would have continued forever.

He brought a wet lock of Abbey’s hair to his face and held it there, pressed between his hand and his cheek. He’d killed her. He’d killed the only woman he wanted for all time.

He was the end of Abbey. He’d destroyed her life just as he’d destroyed his mother’s. Why hadn’t Hexa cut him from her womb when she’d had the chance? Because she was weak. She was scared of pain. Well, Jaxon wasn’t scared. He welcomed it.

Picking up Abbey’s limp body, he carried her to the bed, pulled back the covers and settled her between the sheets. He didn’t bother with a towel. What did it matter when all was said and done?

He returned to the bathroom and retrieved his knife, then stripped off his soaking clothes and shoes and lay down beside her. It was difficult for a Demiáre to end his own life because it required total decapitation, but if he cut his throat deeply enough, he might sleep with Abbey in his arms for a very long time. If the Maker had mercy on him, maybe he would never wake.

He held her cold body in his arms for a long while, then said a prayer for them both and one for his mother. He brought the knife to his throat and pressed the blade against his skin, focusing on how deep and wide he would need to cut before the darkness closed in on him. One strong stroke—

“Jaxon…” Abbey whispered to him so sweetly he could envision her waiting for him in a land where they could truly be together forever. He would meet her there soon…

“It’s so smooth.”

At the first knick against his throat, he realized a slight movement accompanied the small voice. Fearing he’d lost his mind, he set the knife on the nightstand and drew back the covers. Abbey’s hand twitched against her stomach, moving a few inches, then coming to rest on her perfectly flawless skin.

“Feel it, Jaxy. It’s so smooth,” she murmured.

“Haa!” The loud burst of sound was like pure joy escaping from within. “Abbey!” he bellowed.

She cracked open her eyelids a fraction of an inch. “What?”

“Abbey…” His eyes brimming, he leaned down and kissed her full on the mouth.

When he released her lips, she smiled. “I’m guessing it went well?”

“Very well,” he whispered, almost unable to speak through his constricting throat.

“Then why are we so wet?” She glanced at his bare chest and the boxers sticking to his thighs. “And where are your clothes?”

“We…showered.”

She lifted her head and inspected her stomach. “Oh my God. You did it, Jaxon. You healed me.”

He was overcome. He couldn’t speak any longer. He couldn’t even nod in agreement. Abbey was alive. She was alive and getting stronger by the second.

She sat and ran both hands down her abdomen. “I can’t believe it. It’s been so long since I’ve looked down and seen this view.” She took his hand. “Thank you, my friend. Your beautiful blood healed me.”

Finally, he forced his throat to work. “I suppose it did.”

He wasn’t expecting it when Abbey’s expression changed as though she’d had a profound thought and then she slapped him on the arm. “If you knew it was going to be this easy, you should have done it a long time ago! What were you thinking?”

“I…” He laughed, but it sounded slightly insane to his ears. “I should have. It’s true. You’re feeling all right, then?”

“No, I’m not feeling
all right
—I’m feeling awesome!”

He ran a shaky hand through his hair. “That’s…amazing. Praise the Maker.” If the Maker had anything to do with this, Jaxon would consider talking to him more often.

Abbey sat up on her knees to face him. “Hey, what’s the matter with you? I thought you’d be happier.”

The sight of her in a damp bra and panties, her stomach toned and immaculate, hit him like a nuclear detonation. She was alive. And so was he. And there was nothing on this green earth that should keep them apart now.

“I’m happier than you may ever comprehend.” The only thing that could improve this moment would be hearing her agree to be his.

“Feel this.” She took his hand and pressed it to her stomach. ”You did this. I still don’t like blood, but I’m thinking maybe yours is okay in a pinch.”

She smiled, and the remaining blood in his veins began to boil. Her smooth skin and her hand atop his were more than he could endure. “I love you, Abbey, as I’ve never loved another soul.”

She smiled, still holding his hand against her skin. “I love you, too. You know that.”

He shook his head. “Don’t pretend to misunderstand me this time. I’m telling you that
I love you
. I want to be with you for the rest of your life. I want—” he swallowed, “—to
make love
to you.”

With a breath big enough to expand her chest, she dropped his hand and turned away. “I can’t. Please don’t ask me.”

If his heart had swelled when he’d realized she was alive, it was only a larger target now for the sharp blow of her rejection. How could he have been such an idiot? He’d never misinterpreted the signs so completely. “Were you never attracted to me at all?”

“Look at you. Are you kidding me? You’re hotter than a sun flare.” She wrapped her arms around her torso. “But you just don’t get it, do you? What we have—this friendship—can last forever. If I lost that, I don’t think I’d ever find it again.”

“Why would you lose it?”

“Because love and sex don’t go hand in hand for me. I’ve tried. And I’ve failed. Not just failed a little…we’re talking epic crash and burn here. You know Tray?”

“Yes.” He knew Tray. And he couldn’t help but hate the bastard for no other reason than he was Abbey’s ex.

Abbey tucked her feet under her and leaned against the headboard. “I felt this weird connection to him. I even thought I loved him. But at the end of the day, it wasn’t enough to keep us together.”

Jaxon rested his fists against his thighs. “Then he’s the man you love? The one you’d like to spend your life with?”

“What?” Her mahogany brows drew together. “No. That’s not what I’m saying. I thought I might love him, but it was just chemistry, I guess. He never encouraged me to be who I was meant to be, like you do. I never felt truly accepted or loved unconditionally by him like I do with you. Do you understand what I’m saying?”

He frowned, thinking hard. “Woman, I have no clue.”

“I love you too much to lose you. No matter how attracted I am to you, I’m finally growing up and making good choices.”

“You love me…and you’re attracted to me…but denying me is a good choice?”

She squeezed his hand. “I’ve lost too many important people in my life. Kara and my grandma are the only family I have left. Boyfriends don’t last, Jaxon—but friends do.”

“No,” he said, his jaw going hard.

“No?”

“I’m finally seeing it clearly now. You’re afraid, Abbey, and your fear is going to keep us from having all that we deserve out of this life. You see—” he took her by the arm and brought her to him, “—I have no interest in being your boyfriend. I want to be your
forever
.”

His mouth was only an inch from hers, and the feel of his slightly damp boxers against her flat, smooth stomach was utterly decadent. Her heart started to pound and her pussy clenched in anticipation. “Stop,” she whispered against his lips. “You don’t know what you’re doing.”

“Yes I do. I’m proving to you that the right man can both love you and make love to you.” He flipped her onto her back and grasped her wrists, bringing them above her head in an unbreakable grip. “I am that man.”

“Jaxon…” She’d meant the word as a protest, but damn her, it came out as a breathy invitation. When he leaned down and kissed her neck, she almost moaned.

It wasn’t fair. She’d done everything right, and she was still stretched out under Jaxon, pressed into the mattress with no defenses and not enough willpower to continue denying what she’d wanted for so long.

“Listen, I think we should—”

“Do you trust me?” he asked, cutting her off. His muscles were so tense, they stood out like carved granite under his sun-bronzed skin.

“Of course I do.”

“Then for once, stop talking.”

He stripped the thick cotton pillowcase from a pillow and ripped the material lengthwise into two long pieces. She couldn’t even imagine what kind of superhuman strength it took to do that.

A second later, he crushed his lips against hers and lifted her ass in his hands until her feet dangled above the mattress.

He tasted as good as she remembered—too good to continue feasting on and still maintain her resolve. The force of his kiss muddied her mind, but she had enough sense to pull back. “Please don’t make this harder—”

He silenced her by thrusting his tongue into her mouth, and nothing had ever tasted as sweet. She felt him moving, walking on his knees with her held to him, chest to chest.

He pressed her up against the pillows stacked along the headboard and trailed his hand up her arm until he captured her wrist. Before she knew what was happening, one wrist was bound to the headboard. She yanked on the other, but Jaxon was so much stronger than her, it was useless. He hauled her other wrist above her head and tied it down.

Electricity shot from her nipples to her core when she tested the knots and found he’d secured her tightly. These were no symbolic restraints. “What the hell are you doing?”

“I’m showing you that you’re wrong about us. I can love you and stay by your side—and still give you the ride of your life. By the time I’m finished with you, you’ll have no doubt.”

Chapter Eight

Her pussy flooded with moisture. It had been so, so long since she’d truly had a man, and there was no one she could trust with her body like Jaxon.

“You have the same needs you’ve always had, but you’re scared of letting go,” he said.

Since the attack, the idea of being bound and dominated wasn’t quite as simple. “I used to get off on those kinds of games, but it’s not the same anymore.”

“You don’t have to be frightened of me. I would never hurt you…unless you ask me to…” The wicked gleam in his eyes showed a side of Jaxon she’d never seen before.

Slipping off the edge of the mattress, he came to his feet on the floor and stripped off his boxers. He was totally nude, and Abbey went wide-eyed staring at his package. Kara had told her Demiáre men were big, but she’d never seen how big until tonight. “Holy…”

He was magnificent standing naked beside the bed, tall and lean in the waist, with abs faceted like ripples of sand in the desert. His sturdy thighs and the outline of his tight ass told her he could take her so hard, she would have to beg for mercy. “Oh…mercy,” she whispered.