The Skeptics Annotated Bible (240 page)

10 Then died Ibzan, and was buried at Beth-lehem.

11 And after him Elon, a Zebulonite, judged Israel; and he judged Israel ten years.

12 And Elon the Zebulonite died, and was buried in Aijalon in the country of Zebulun.

(12.13-14)
“Abdon … had forty sons and thirty nephews, that rode on threescore and ten ass colts.”

(13-16)
The story of Samson
It starts out in the usual way, with the children of Israel doing evil in the sight of the Lord, and the Lord doing what he always does in such cases: he sells them. (Except that in this case he “delivered” them to the Philistines for forty years, so maybe the Israelites were a gift and he didn’t get paid for them.)

13 And after him
Abdon
the son of Hillel, a Pirathonite, judged Israel.

14 And he
had forty sons and thirty nephews, that rode on threescore and ten ass colts
: and he judged Israel eight years.

15 And Abdon the son of Hillel the Pirathonite died, and was buried in Pirathon in the land of Ephraim, in the mount of the Amalekites.

13
And
the children of Israel did evil again in the sight of the LORD; and the LORD delivered them into the hand of the Philistines forty years.

(13.1)
“The children of Israel did evil again in the sight of the LORD; and the LORD delivered them into the hand of the Philistines forty years.”

2 And there was a certain man of Zorah, of the family of the Danites, whose name was Manoah; and his wife was barren, and bare not.

3 And
the angel of the LORD appeared
unto the woman,
and said unto her, Behold now, thou art barren, and bearest not: but thou shalt conceive, and bear a son.

(13.3a) After giving, selling, or renting the Israelites to the Philistines, God needed to find someone to help kill the Israelites’ new owners. And that’s where Sampson comes in.

Sampson’s birth was a lot like Jesus’. An angel visited his mom to announce that she was going to have a son.

(13.3b)
“The angel of the LORD appeared … and said unto her, Behold now, thou art barren, and bearest not: but thou shalt conceive, and bear a son.”
Manoah’s nameless wife, like so many biblical women, is barren. But an angel (or “a man of God”) fixes that, and Samson is born.

4 Now therefore beware, I pray thee, and
drink not wine nor strong drink
, and eat not any unclean thing:

(13.4, 7)
“Drink not wine nor strong drink.”
71 Is it OK to drink alcohol?

5 For, lo, thou shalt conceive, and bear a son; and
no razor shall come on his head
: for
the child shall be a Nazarite
unto God from the womb: and he shall begin to deliver Israel out of the hand of the Philistines.

(13.5a)
“No razor shall come on his head.”
133 Is it OK for men to have long hair?

(13.5b)
“The child shall be a Nazarite.”
According to Numbers 6.6, Nazarites are not to touch any dead bodies. But Samson was a mass murderer. He must have touched hundreds of dead bodies. (Or did he just kill his victims, being careful not to touch them after they were dead?)

(13.6-10) The angel visited Samson’s mom and impregnated her while her husband wasn’t around. She didn’t ask him where he came from and he refused to tell her his name.