The Skeptics Annotated Bible (747 page)

38 Then certain of the scribes and of the Pharisees answered, saying, Master, we would see a sign from thee.

39 But he answered and said unto them, An evil and adulterous generation seeketh after a sign; and there shall no sign be given to it, but the sign of the prophet Jonas:

(12.39)
“An evil and adulterous generation seeketh after a sign.”
360 Did Jesus perform signs and wonders?

40 For as Jonas was three days and three nights in the whale’s belly; so shall the Son of man be three days and three nights in the heart of the earth.

(12.40)
“Jonas was three days and three nights in the whale's belly.”
Jesus believed in the literal truth of the fish story in Jonah. He predicts that he will be “in the heart of the earth” for three days and three nights. If by this he meant that he would be in the tomb for three days and three nights, then either he was mistaken or the gospels are in error. Because according to the gospels (this is one of the few things they all seem to agree on), Jesus was in the tomb for only one day and two nights.
324 Was Jonah swallowed by a fish or a whale?

41 The men of Nineveh shall rise in judgment with this generation, and shall condemn it: because they repented at the preaching of Jonas; and, behold, a greater than Jonas is here.

42 The queen of the south shall rise up in the judgment with this generation, and shall condemn it: for she came from the uttermost parts of the earth to hear the wisdom of Solomon; and, behold, a greater than Solomon is here.

(12.42)
“Behold, a greater than Solomon is here.”
217 Who was greater: Jesus or Solomon?

(12.43-45) When an unclean spirit (whatever that may be) leaves a person's body, he goes out to find another. Not finding any, he comes back with seven other spirits more wicked than himself and repossesses the person.

43 When the unclean spirit is gone out of a man, he walketh through dry places, seeking rest, and findeth none.

(12.43)
“When the unclean spirit is gone out of a man, he walketh through dry places, seeking rest, and findeth none.”

44 Then he saith, I will return into my house from whence I came out; and when he is come, he findeth it empty, swept, and garnished.

(12.44)
“Then he saith, I will return into my house from whence I came out; and when he is come, he findeth it empty, swept, and garnished.”

45 Then goeth he, and taketh with himself seven other spirits more wicked than himself, and they enter in and dwell there: and the last state of that man is worse than the first. Even so shall it be also unto this wicked generation.

(12.45)
“Then goeth he, and taketh with himself seven other spirits more wicked than himself, and they enter in and dwell there: and the last state of that man is worse than the first. Even so shall it be also unto this wicked generation.”

46 While he yet talked to the people, behold, his mother and his brethren stood without, desiring to speak with him.

(12.47-48) When Jesus' mother and brothers want to see him, Jesus asks, “Who is my mother? Who are my brothers?” So much for Jesus' family values.
107 How should parents be treated?

The fact that Jesus had brothers, though, shows that Mary, contrary to Catholic teaching, was not always a virgin.

47 Then one said unto him, Behold, thy mother and thy brethren stand without, desiring to speak with thee.

(12:47)
“Thy mother and thy brethren stand without, desiring to speak with thee.”

48 But he answered and said unto him that told him, Who is my mother? and who are my brethren?

(12:48)
“Who is my mother?”

49 And he stretched forth his hand toward his disciples, and said, Behold my mother and my brethren!

50 For whosoever shall do the will of my Father which is in heaven, the same is my brother, and sister, and mother.

13
The same day went Jesus out of the house, and sat by the sea side.

2 And great multitudes were gathered together unto him, so that he went into a ship, and sat; and the whole multitude stood on the shore.

3 And he spake many things unto them in parables, saying, Behold, a sower went forth to sow;

4 And when he sowed, some seeds fell by the way side, and the fowls came and devoured them up:

5 Some fell upon stony places, where they had not much earth: and forthwith they sprung up, because they had no deepness of earth:

6 And when the sun was up, they were scorched; and because they had no root, they withered away.

7 And some fell among thorns; and the thorns sprung up, and choked them:

8 But other fell into good ground, and brought forth fruit, some an hundredfold, some sixtyfold, some thirtyfold.

9 Who hath ears to hear, let him hear.

(13.10-15) Jesus explains that the reason he speaks in parables is so that no one will understand him, “lest … they … should understand … and should be converted, and I should heal them.”
361 Did Jesus have secret teachings?