The Treason Blade (Battle for Alsaar Book 1) (19 page)

“I am glad to
hear it,” Eira said softly with a slow nod. She bent over and studied the
fabric. “This peace will be good for all of us. I am glad the threat of the
Tourna has brought about something that should have happened years ago.”

Ishar rose.
“I cannot stay long. I just wanted to thank you for making Fenric feel
welcome.”

Eira gave her
a look of gladness. “It was my pleasure. I look forward to seeing more of a
Haaldyn presence here.” Ishar turned to go. Eira stopped her with her next
words. “Are you going riding tomorrow?”

Ishar looked
back and shook her head. “No. I promised Varyk I would watch the Raanans
instructing the Britai.” She pursed her lips. “However, the day after I thought
I might ride northward toward the Daiwen for some hunting. I am still taking my
morning rides but I have decided to keep them early in the day.”

Eira nodded.
“I, too, am looking to ride soon. Varyk’s time is so easily spent each day.
Perhaps I will make time to ride that day as well and we will meet.”

Ishar nodded.
“The last time I went with Traevyn and the others, we came to this hollow
bordered by rocks on either side, not too far from the river.”

Eira laid
down her needle. “I know the place. It is a good hunting spot.” Her smile
brightened. “If we do not get a chance to speak of the ride again, look for me
a little before midday. If I can make it, I will be there at that time.”

“I will leave
later in the morning then and let Simi have her run. Bring your bow. It would
be nice to allow time for hunting.”

“I agree,” Eira nodded in agreement.

“Then on that note, I bid you good night,” Ishar
said with another yawn, “I think I should seek my bed before I simply close my
eyes and fall right where I am.”

“Good night,
Ishar,” Eira laughed.

Ishar made
her way back to the door and opened it.

Audris stood
before the entrance, a tray in her hands. “Lady Ishar, how are you this
evening? I have brought my lady a drink for a good night’s rest. Is anything
you require?”

Ishar stepped
through and to the side. “I am well, Audris. See to your mistress. I am fine
for this evening. All I need now is a bed and some rest and both I can acquire
on my own.” Ishar made her way down to her own door and slipped inside.

The only light
was the fire burning away in the hearth. Ishar made her way to the bedside and
picked up a candle. A stick by the fire would light it. Even as she touched the
candle, she felt a presence and jerked around, scanning the darkness.

“Did you
think I would simper away like a child?” Traevyn asked sardonically.

With the
flickering light she could just make out his presence next to the window where
he leaned back against the wall.

He moved away
and came toward her. “Well?”

Ishar made
her way to the fire with the unlit candle. “I could say I do not know what you
are talking about,” she said casually.

“But you will
not,” he answered tightly.

Ishar set the
candle down on stone unlit. She turned and faced him as he came into the
flickering light. “Traevyn, I was trying to be nice this evening.”

“Hiding in
plain sight is nice?” he asked cryptically.

She rubbed
her forehead. “I knew you would bring up this afternoon, and for some reason,
you simply refuse to see my side.”

“Which would
be what?
Denial?”

Ishar sighed.
Frustrated, she stepped closer, “Fine. You want the truth? This is it: I am
aware of you, Traevyn, as more than just a warrior. Does that make you feel
better about this situation? Because I do not see how it can.”

Traevyn ran
his hands roughly through his long hair. “Because you do not wish to pursue
it,” he argued with raised hands.

“I cannot
pursue it,” she said in exasperation. “It goes against everything my people
believe in, in everything I have been taught since childhood.”

“If you feel
something for someone, you should not have to deny those feelings,” he ground
out through clenched teeth.

“And you call
me a child?” she chided. Ishar shook her head at his words. “You do not know
what you are asking. I have had time to think of this. If we pursue this
feeling, then what we have will become something more than the friendship I now
value. I realize that now. And when these feelings grow, how do you think it
will be for me to be around you and not be able to be with you? That is the
future you are encouraging for me, one of constant torment.”

“I also have
had time to reflect. We can be together,” he stated calmly. “Stay at Taryn.
Pledge yourself to me. We will be careful.”

Ishar jerked
back as if slapped. “I cannot so quickly set aside the rules that have bound me
my whole life. They were put in place for a reason.” Ishar gentled her voice as
she tried to make him understand. “It was decided early on that a woman of my
people would have the right to fight, to lead a warband, to serve her people in
the defense of her country. But the thought came: what if after all that
training, when she was most desperately needed in the fight, she was found to
be with child and could not go? Or she had the obligation of a husband and
children already born?

Haaldyns are born with a sense of duty to children
and family that is different from yours. We would have no others
raise
what is our blood, the continuing of our line and our
traditions.” Ishar glanced back at the sparks popping within the red and gold flame.
“You do not have to understand my people’s laws, but I do and the only way I
can be with you honorably would be to take the mark of a retired warrior.” She
shook her head. “And I know you would not ask me to do that in these days when
I am needed more than ever. To do anything else takes the chance of bringing
shame on my family and my warband.” Ishar glanced at him with a set face. “And
I would rather die than let that happen.”

Traevyn stood
before her still as stone. She could see her words had sunk in by the
bewildered look he held as he stared into the fire. He glanced at her face.
“You tell me that you will not even think of pledging yourself to me until
after this war is over.” His eyes darkened and his breath caught. He stepped up
to where she stood by the fire “We could both be dead by then.”

She nodded
softly. “I know. I am so sorry,” she added brokenly. The words seemed so
inadequate to what she felt.

He reached up
and cupped the side of her face. She allowed the touch, even as she felt his
face move closer. Ishar closed her eyes as his lips brushed hers gently twice
before settling and kissing her deeply. She drank the taste of him in this
instance of weakness. It felt good, but after a moment she braced her hand
against his chest and pushed. It was several seconds before Traevyn reluctantly
stepped back. There were no words to describe the expression on his face as he
battled within himself. Traevyn trailed his fingers down the side of her face
and stepped back into the shadows. In the flicker of the light he was gone. She
heard the door open and close with a rush. And then there was only the dark
emptiness of the room.

Ishar turned back to the flame and let the tears
burning the back of her throat overflow as she sat on the stone and tried to
breathe through shaky breaths, her chest tight as she stared blindly into the
flickering flame. In that single moment, Ishar was not certain whether she
wished Traevyn to honor her choice or not.

*

For the next
two nights, Ishar slept little. It seemed the words between her and Traevyn
would not so simply slip away. She spent the next days hard at work.
During the daylight hours, working arduously alongside the Raanan
warriors as they instructed the Britai soldiers and until the late night
working with Varyk or talking with Fenric.
Though it was time with her
old sword master she seemed hard pressed to find. Fenric, with his ready humor
and wit, had found quick friends among the Raanan and Britai soldiers and had
even appeared to have an agreeable nature with Eira and the other Lute with
whom he crossed paths. To Ishar, it was a sign that the future union boded well
for all.

A cool and cloudy sky appeared a few days after
Ishar and Traevyn’s late night conversation. A late spring storm rumbled in the
far distance. The last couple of days of riding and hard work had made evident
every bruise of late and her left forearm still ached from the recent cut.
Fatigue ruled her body. She had once more slept little, only stared into the
darkness hearing Traevyn’s words whisper themselves into her ear. Ishar made a
point of distancing herself from him whenever possible and Traevyn kept himself
apart and busy. She found she missed the sense of his black eyes upon her.

Ishar blinked as she arose and wondered if she
looked as weary as she felt. A splash of cold water did little to brighten her
drained appearance. She made her way down to the main hall. In a rare
occurrence, there was no one to greet her except the servants. Ishar ate her
food quickly and went in search of substance to bring with her later on her
ride. She was looking forward to the hunting trip and hoped Eira would join
her. Perhaps an afternoon spent with the Lute woman would offer a feeling of
serenity to her conflicted mind. She made her way out of the fortress in search
of Fenric. She found him in the horse shelter, saddling his gelding.

She hung her
leather satchel over a jutting board and watched him, perplexed. “What are you
doing?”

Fenric
glanced up in surprise.
“Ishar.
Good morning.”

“Good
morning,” she replied quickly,
then
asked her question
once more.

Fenric
cleared his throat. “I am heading back to give your father the good news.”

Ishar
furrowed her brow. “You have only just arrived these past few days and father
is on his way.” She gently laid a hand upon his arm. “Why not stay to greet him
here? I long for times past, when there were moments such as this for us to
speak of things dear to our hearts. I have enjoyed our last few days together.”

Fenric gave
the cinch a final extra tug to test for tightness. His smile was relaxed as he
turned and faced her. “Those moments are few and far between and all but lost.
No. I will go because I desire to wipe all worry from your father’s coming when
I inform him I have personally seen to your good health and well-being and
found that Varyk has been an excellent host.” Fenric reached over and patted
her shoulder. “Just think. He will come with true gladness in his heart knowing
all is well.” Her arm slid from his as he turned and gathered a wrapped bundle
set at his feet. This he tied to the back of his saddle among his other gear.

Ishar could
see the wisdom in his words. It did nothing to ease the heartache of his sudden
leave. “No one has insulted you?” She asked with unease.

Fenric’s look
was one of reproof. “I am a Haaldyn warrior at heart, even though I am retired.
If someone had insulted me, I would not be saddling my horse. Rather, you would
hear the clang of steel.”

His words relaxed the tightness in her chest and
she smiled at him gently. “I just want to make certain someone has not made
your stay uncomfortable by either words or actions.” She moved closer and
touched his shoulder. “Not everyone is comfortable with the peace we are
attempting. It will take time.”

Fenric gave
her a rough clap on the back. “Now girl, there is nothing wrong, I tell you. I
simply want to let your father know there are no worries he need have about
this
meeting, that
he must come here with all haste.”
He raised his hands in exasperation. “Is there something wrong with my desire
to ease a father’s fears? This is something I understand. One day, perhaps, so
will you.”

“Contrary to
your belief, I do understand.” Ishar shrugged ruefully, “It is just that I am
sorry to see you leave so soon after you have arrived.”

Fenric
stepped close and ruffled her hair. He was only one of several people that
could have gotten away with the gesture. “You will see me shortly. This I
promise.” Fenric grabbed the gelding’s reins and led the horse around Ishar,
down the aisle and through the open door.

She followed
him through the courtyard and toward the inner gate. “What of Varyk?” She asked
with curiosity. Surely Fenric would not insult their hosts.

Fenric quickly
replied. “I have already said my thanks to him and his lady. They, too, bade me
stay but understood and agreed after they saw my determination.”

“Like they
had a choice? Once you set your mind to something, Fenric, it is unchangeable.”
Ishar chuckled. “Were you going to say goodbye?” She added with a frown.

“Wipe that
look from your face. You know I would not go without a leaving word to you.”

They made
their way under the inner threshold and toward the main outer gate. Outside the
holding, Ishar patted her old friend on the shoulder. “I wish for older days
upon occasion, when you were still my weapons master and we were not so easily
parted. Still, I wish you a swift ride, old friend, and hope to see you soon.”