The Unpleasantness at Baskerville Hall (Reeves & Worcester Steampunk Mysteries Book 4) (22 page)

On our previous visit, we’d arrived to find Lily lying on the ground about to be eaten by a Lizard Man. This time it was Ida lying on the ground being menaced by a giant octopus.

I grasped Emmeline by the arm. “Don’t attack the octopus, Emmie! It’s not real. It isn’t real, is it, Reeves?”

“No, sir. The octopus is widely regarded as a sea creature, and rarely wears a hat.”

“I wouldn’t have attacked it anyway,” said Emmeline. “It’s only Ida.”

We stayed where we were and watched. Ida did a lot of screaming, and the octopus did a lot of waggling. Rather a strange looking octopus it was too. It wasn’t just the hat. Its eyes appeared to be spinning, and all eight arms were flailing up and down as though the creature was having a fit.

Henry then rushed over and placed himself between Ida and the octopus. He was wearing a large white hat and, I have to say, he carried it off considerably better than the octopus. He stood his ground and appeared to be giving the octopus a good ticking off. There was considerable gesticulating and quite a bit of head tossing.

“Henry makes a good hero, don’t you think?” said Emmeline.

“It’s the hat,” I said. “Anyone can look heroic in a white hat.”

“It
is
a fine hat,” said Emmeline. “What do you think, Reeves?”

“I find it a little ostentatious, miss, though acceptable if one is in the habit of receiving octopi.”

I don’t know if it was in reaction to Henry’s ticking off, but steam suddenly began to erupt from the side of the octopus’s head, and one of its arms became detached, shooting a good fifty feet into the air!

“Cut!” shouted Henry. “Stapleford, I thought you said the octopus was fixed.”

“What ho, Henry,” I said, walking over now that the scene had ended. “I like the octopus.”

“Hello, Roderick, Lily. It’s a capital octopus, isn’t it? Or, at least, it will be once we get it fixed. Stapleford!”

“Why, Lily, what
have
you done to your boots?” said Ida, sitting up. “They look ruined. You haven’t been plodding across the moor, have you?”

“Oh, is that you down there, Ida?” said Emmeline. “I thought you were part of the octopus.”

I swiftly placed myself between the two women and offered Ida a hand up.

“Thank you, Roderick,” she said. “I’d offer to lend you a pair of my boots, Lily, but your feet are
far
too large. I suppose you could try the farrier.”

I prayed that Reeves had a firm hold on the hunting rifle.

There was a strange hissing noise behind me, which I hoped wasn’t Emmeline, and then a loud pop followed by yet another tentacle flying through the air.

“I think we should all move to safety,” said Henry, echoing my thoughts exactly. I hooked my arm through Emmeline’s and guided her a sufficient distance away from both the octopus
and
Ida.

“She is insufferable!” hissed Emmeline. “You wouldn’t let me shoot Falconbridge. The least you can do is let me wing Ida.”

Meanwhile, the octopus continued to splutter and shed arms as Stapleford danced around it, presumably trying to switch the thing off without being scalded by the escaping steam.

“I thought you’d given up putting hats on your monsters,” I said to Henry.

“Only for the Lizard Men. This is the first time we’ve used the octopus so I thought it best to let the audience know it was a bad one. We won’t need the hat in the later scenes.”

The octopus started to hiss even louder and its remaining arms stopped waggling and slumped to the ground.

“Got it!” shouted Stapleford. “I think I set the pressure too high.”

“Stapleford made the octopus?” I asked Henry.

“Yes, I think it’s his best yet. He’s a whizz with all things mechanical.”

“We saw that cloven-footed woman this morning,” I said.

“What? Where?” said Henry, looking worried.

“On the high moor,” I said. “She legged it into the fog before we could talk to her, but we got a good look at her this time. She’s not a promethean. She’s an automaton.”

“And she was wearing the dress from Theodosia’s portrait,” said Emmeline. “Or an exact copy. Did you have one made up for one of your moving pictures?”

“No. Our productions are outdoor adventures. There’s very little call for ball dresses.”

“But you have seamstresses here to run up your costumes, don’t you?” asked Emmeline.

“No. We buy all our costumes from Simmons and Treddle of Plymouth,” said Henry. “If anything needs altering we use one of the maids at the Hall. But ... are you sure this dress was an exact copy of Theodosia’s?”

“Positive,” said Emmeline. “I looked at the portrait only this morning.”

“Is it possible that someone found Theodosia’s actual dress?” I asked. “Maybe in an old trunk at the Hall?”

“It’s possible,” said Henry. “There are all sorts of trunks in the attic.”

“Has anyone shown an interest in these trunks?” I asked.

“Not that I recall.”

“Are there really trunks of old ball gowns in the attic, Henry?” said Ida, sidling over. “I think a ball scene would be perfect for
The Creature from 20,000 Leagues Under the Quarry
.”

“Really?” said Henry. “I don’t see a ball scene being exciting enough.”

“That’s because you’re a man, Henry,” said Ida. “All balls are exciting. The dresses, the dancing—”

“The giant octopuses,” interrupted Emmeline. “Now that would liven up the ball scene — have the giant octopus turn up unexpectedly and eat everyone. Ida can be first.”

“And Lily can bash the octopus with a club,” said Ida. “She’s so
manly
.”

“Ah, Stapleford,” I said, steering Emmeline, with difficulty, away from Ida and over towards the octopus. “We met your secretary this morning. Odd chap. Is he American?”

Stapleford stopped tinkering with the octopus. “You called at my house?”

I had hoped for a stronger reaction from Stapleford. He looked surprised and, perhaps a little put out, but there was no sharp intake of breath or any sign of guilt or anger.

“Yes,” I said. “We were walking past and thought it neighbourly to call. Miss Fossett twisted a fetlock. Ow!”

Emmeline had kicked me!

“I twisted an
ankle
, Roderick, not a fetlock. I’m not a horse,” said Emmeline, glancing over her shoulder.

“Of course not,“ I said. “Yes, your man — Falconbridge, is it? — wouldn’t let us in. Said he had strict orders to keep everyone out.”

“That’s correct,” said Stapleford. “One can never be too careful while Selden’s on the loose.”

“Is he American? This Falconbridge,” I said.

“Yes. I acquired him last month.”

“One of Edison’s models, is he?” I said.

“I believe so,” said Stapleford. “The Americans use a new type of electrical memory circuit. I bought Falconbridge to assist in my work. His scientific and computational skills are superior to the latest British models.”

“Really?” I said. “Did he help build the octopus?”

“He assisted with the theoretical work.”

“You should bring him here to see his handiwork in action,” I said. “Or isn’t he allowed out of the house?”

“He’s far too busy to leave the house,” said Stapleford. “Henry’s always asking for new machines, and I need Falconbridge to work on the blueprints.”

Henry and Ida came over to join us.

“How long will you need to fix the octopus, Stapleford?” asked Henry.

“Fifteen minutes should do it.”

“One more scene before luncheon, then,” said Henry. “Chumleigh! Gather up those tentacles, and give Mr Stapleford a hand.”

Now that I had Henry and Stapleford together I thought it timely to enquire about Sir Robert’s will.

“There’s something that’s been bothering me, Henry,” I said.

“What’s that, Roderick?”

“Did Sir Robert leave a will?”

Again, I watched Stapleford’s face. If he was in league with Edison and waiting for an opportune moment to plant a forged will at the Hall, he’d have to be worried by my interest.

But he showed no emotion at all. Which both surprised and disappointed me. Although, thinking about it, he could have been on his guard after I’d questioned him about Falconbridge.

“There’s no need for a will,” said Henry. “Everything’s entailed. The title, the estate, Quarrywood.”

“Entailed?” I asked.

“Grandfather had it done to make sure the title and the estate were never split up. The heir inherits everything, and always will.”

“Even Quarrywood?”

“Even Quarrywood. The governor made sure that Quarrywood would always remain part of the estate when he set up the company ”

“What if someone turned up at the door claiming to have a will written by your father leaving the estate to them?” I asked.

“It would be worthless,” said Henry. “Everything’s entailed. I’d honour any small bequests obviously. But the estate belongs to the title, not to the person.”

Well, that was a surprise. My best motive dashed to the ground.

“I must go,” said Henry. “I have to prepare for the next scene. Come on, Ida.”

“I need a word with Lily first,” said Ida. “How
is
your fetlock, poor Lily? Does it still hurt?”

“It was my
ankle,
Ida. I’m just not used to walking in all this mud. If only I had such dainty feet as yours. They’re so cute. They look like little trotters.”

I thought it best to escort Emmeline back to the Hall.

~

“I do
not
have big feet and if anyone’s fat, it’s Ida. Do you think I have big feet?”

“I think you have perfect feet,” I said.

“Just because she’s a midget with tiny feet she thinks she’s dainty, but she’s not, is she?”

“No. Not at all.”

I had the feeling this could be a long walk. But at least Reeves had a firm hand on the shotgun and the distance between Emmeline and Ida was growing with each step.

“I don’t know why she’s so beastly to me. I have no interest in Henry.”

“I expect she’s jealous of your willowy beauty,” I said.

“Do you think so?” she said, squeezing my arm. “You do mean willowy in a good way, don’t you? Only mother’s always complaining that I don’t eat enough.”

“You eat the perfect amount,” I said. “Don’t you agree, Reeves?”

“Indeed, sir. I did hear via Miss Spurgeon’s maid, that her mistress was considerably vexed that Sir Henry had offered to create a moving picture series specifically for you, miss. The
Perils of Poor Lily
I believe it was called
.
.”

“But I didn’t want it,” said Emmeline. “Ida can have it.”

“I believe that exacerbated the problem, miss. You didn’t want it. She did. And yet Sir Henry offered it to you.”

“Oh,” said Emmeline. “Well, that’s just silly. Ida would hate being tied to railway tracks and dangled from cliffs every week.”

“Indeed, miss. I suspect it is not the content of the series, but the fact that a series was offered, which has nettled Miss Spurgeon.”

“Reeves, is right.” I said. “Hell hath no fury like an actress overlooked.”

Emmeline’s mood improved considerably.

“What’s our plan now?” she asked. “Are we going to look for trunks of old gowns in the attic?”

“I was rather thinking of a spot of lunch,” I said. “One cannot deduct on an empty stomach.”

“What about Lady Julia? We only just managed to evade her after breakfast. She’ll be extra vigilant this time. I expect she’ll order the servants to bar the dining room doors the moment luncheon’s served.”

“In that case I shall think of something ingenious and unexpected.”

“Will it be exciting?”

“Very.”

“Does it involve jumping out of windows?”

“It may involve jumping
through
windows. Glass and all. We Worcesters are nothing if not unpredictable.”

~

We stopped by the mire gate to check for signs that the cloven-footed Lottie had exited the mire there, but found nothing. She’d either doubled back or was still out there, hiding in the mist. We stood on the mire’s edge for a short while, peering into the gloom, but even Reeves couldn’t see any movement. The mist may not have been as thick as before, but it still obscured much of the mire and the moor to the east.

So we turned and set off along the Yew Walk. And stopped dead the moment the Hall came into view.

Lupin was climbing a drainpipe on the back wall of the Hall. He was halfway to the roof and making short work of it. But that wasn’t the half of it. He was wearing what looked like a policeman’s helmet.

“Is that...?” I said.

“I believe so, sir,” said Reeves. “Most disturbing.”

As Lupin neared the roof, he swung effortless from the drainpipe, hooked one hand onto the castellated parapet and pulled himself up and over. He then ambled along the flat roof, only his head and helmet visible. And then he was gone.

Twenty-One

he doing up there?” asked Emmeline.