The Winemaker's Dinner: Dessert (The Winemaker's Feast) (15 page)

He watched her for a time, asking himself over and over if this was what he wanted to do. But the headline ran through his head, and he knew it was the smart play, the self-preserving play. He was finished being a fool. What they’d once had, the person he’d thought she’d been, was gone.

Ivan stole into the bathroom, grabbed the token of a young love lost, and returned to her bedroom. He set up the breakfast he’d meant to share on the dresser near her bed and placed the bear next to it, on top of the newspaper and holding a pile of paper napkins. Then he took a final look at her, made a final gut check, and left the apartment.

He told himself he was going back to a life he was now free to live, free to find a way to enjoy. His burden had been lifted.

Chapter 20

“Waiting for the End”

A
S
R
AYS
O
F
S
UN
W
ARMED
H
ER
S
KIN
, Jaden’s mind powered on before her eyes or the rest of her body followed. She smiled as the night rushed back to her, and she relived its passion in seconds. The incredible ache in all the right places, along with the tender spots on her hips and wrists that she knew Ivan’s hands had marked, elicited another grin. Her fingers traced her hip, and she breathed out a soft laugh. Yep, he’d left his mark. He may as well have spelled out,
IVAN WAS HERE
. She stretched and flexed her body, enjoying every twinge as she twisted in the sheets. Her whole body throbbed in the aftermath of pleasure.

Her body also registered the fact that there was no arm draped over her before her brain did. No sweaty torso tucked in behind her. No breath danced across the back of her neck. A siren of alarm began to whine in her body, but nothing from the night before had hinted she’d be waking up alone this morning.

As her eyes opened and caught up to the rest of her body, they went in search of answers. She rolled over to find the answer staring back at her with black button eyes. Noting the breakfast for two, she was eager to see what good news BoBo had to deliver this time. She bounced across the room to the dresser in search of one of Ivan’s infamous notes. “Thank you, BoBo,” she mused aloud as she snagged the napkins.

Still naked, she made herself comfortable with the pillows and linens all piled up in the middle of the bed and began to read.

Jaden,

Last night was amazing. I’d forgotten what it was like to feel such intense chemistry and unspoken connection with another person’s soul. If I’d slept at all it would have been a waste of such a perfect moment. But I didn’t sleep, and instead I dreamed of a destiny I thought I’d lost.

Overwhelmed with the words, Jaden smiled as she continued to the next napkin.

I’ve always viewed love and its progression as an education. You learn from your failures and grow with successes. Many of these lessons are hard learned, but the result can be pure magic that makes every tear shed worth it. I can say without a doubt that the love we shared has been my greatest educator. It has taught me to understand what I need in my life to truly be happy. But it has also shown me what I can’t have in order to do so.

She paused at the sudden turn and felt foreboding begin to build within her. Yet she continued.

Last night, with you, my everything was distilled into a singular magical symphony of beauty and perfection. But this morning served me with an unwanted lesson in my continued education. A lesson in dreams versus reality. Fate versus hope. Business versus pleasure.

The foreboding turned to queasiness, and Jaden dropped the napkin to her lap—not daring to read any more. She looked back to the bear that had once delivered such a beautiful message, but who now seemed to have betrayed her. She forced herself to continue.

As you fell asleep under my touch, I imagined a life where the mistakes of the past held no bearing on the prosperity of the future. One where love would find a way, like in a fairy tale. But this enthusiasm, anchored only by a breath of possibility, has been tainted by an ugly realization...a single image that warns of countless future risks and pitfalls.

What the hell is he talking about?
Jaden now felt a flush of anger and confusion. She looked back to the bear as if to ask for an explanation. It was then she noticed that BoBo and the breakfast were not the only new items on her dresser. Under him sat a folded newspaper. In a flood of panic she snatched it, toppling the bear to its side. She quickly placed him back upright, feeling foolish for believing she needed to.

As she scanned the paper, anger, embarrassment, and sorrow flooded her entire body, replacing the warmth she’d awoken with.

“Oh my God,” she gasped. The sight of that bastard all over her was sickening. But nauseated or not, she forced herself to skim the article.

Jaden Thorne, formerly linked to Dr. Ivan Rusilko as half of last year’s gorgeous Miami Beach power couple, cozies up to her recently departed One Hot Kitchen co-host, Damian Gris. Gris is set to star in the new series What a Man Wants. Rumors of a possible relationship between the two circulated from several sources during their days on set, and it seems things remain quite friendly despite the professional split. Could they be a new couple in the industry?

Fighting back tears, she picked up the last napkin.

Please know that I consider you the most amazing thing to happen to me in my life, and I thank you for that unconditionally. However, I now fully understand the extent of your commitment to a kind of life I want no part of. I want you to be happy, to achieve all your dreams, but this path to find them is one I cannot and will not travel with you. I have to be true to myself. I have to protect myself. I cannot bear another blow from you, as the last one nearly shattered me. I wish you nothing less than the world, and I know you will have it. I know now you will do anything to get there. But I will always remember you as my baby girl...

With that final goodbye, Jaden fell apart.

She curled into the fetal position and cried herself dry. He had officially written The End on their great romance. Her hopes of sparking a new chance for their love washed away like a grain of sand into an ocean of never mores. She lay there a moment longer, and then wrenched herself to sitting. The voices in her head were angry.

How dare he? He won’t even talk to her?
Won’t even hear what she has to say?

Maybe he should have, but she created
this situation. She brought this on herself.

Still, he should want to hear
the truth from her.

She had a chance to tell him
six months ago. And she didn’t.

Jaden sighed. It wasn’t enough to prove her love for him against some asshole from Los Angeles. She was now fighting an assumption—one well-fueled with circumstantial evidence and documentation—as untrue as it might be. She’d lost his trust, and all the privileges that came with it because she’d been chasing what she thought was her dream. And she’d gotten lost along the way.

She wanted to scream because the truth was, she was over it—over the whole thing. Over the bullshit glamour and ridiculous lifestyle she’d been forced to live for this industry. She would trade it all for a different tomorrow, but proving that was something it didn’t seem likely she—or anyone else, for that matter—would be able to do. Why couldn’t she have woken up with him, talked with him, explained everything? They hadn’t exchanged one word the entire night. Had she wasted her chance? At the time she’d felt they’d spoken volumes and the time for conversation would come, but it seemed no real communication had happened at all.

She was lost and alone in a life she’d created. And the one thing she needed, the person who made it all worthwhile, had just put his heart onto a pile of napkins and left her behind.

Chapter 21

“Diamonds and Rust”

“T
HIS
L
OOK
G
OOD
?” Liz turned as she put the final touches on the display of colorful boxes and bottles just inside the entrance to Club Essentia. The first shipment of Novella, their new custom product line, had just arrived.

“Perrrrrfect,” Ivan purred back to her as he marveled at the display, which held one of his personal dreams, now ready to be unveiled.

“You are talking about the display, right?” She flirted shamelessly and arched her back, he noticed, to emphasize her ass.

“Maybe,” he countered as he walked past her toward his office. “What’s on the schedule?”

As he entered his office, he glanced out at the view for a moment. It never got old, and despite the turmoil of his final encounter with Jaden, it seemed more brilliant now.
Life
seemed more brilliant now since he’d given himself permission to step out from beneath the rain cloud of doubt and sadness. He’d spent six days now on a clear path forward, on a plan, and the world around him seemed more as it should be: beautiful. He slid behind his desk and started shuffling paperwork, waiting for Liz to follow.

After a moment she strolled in and shut the door behind her. “Your schedule has been crazy this week.”

“Tell me about it.”