TheKingsLady (9 page)

Darius gritted his teeth and tightened his grip on the wheel. Knowing Simon talked about the kiss he laid on his puss. “Look, I know we agreed to see where things went with us and yeah, I’m still on board with that. It’s just—”

“Saying and the actual doing are two different things,” Simon interrupted.

Darius let out a breath he didn’t realize he had been holding. “That’s part of it.”

“And the other part? ‘Cause I meant what I said. I’m not going to pressure you so stop being weird around me. Are you freaked I’m not going to be your friend if things go further?”

A great weight lifted from Darius’s shoulders, his old friend knew him so damn well. The idea of losing Simon’s friendship gnawed at him since admitting to this damnable attraction. “Yeah, that’s got a lot to do with it.”

“Well stop, not going to happen. Ever. So let’s go and get a few drinks and perhaps a good fuck will help loosen you up a bit.” Simon chuckled.

They drove the rest of the way in companionable silence. The closer they got to the club the more his muscles relaxed. Glancing at his watch he cursed, one in the morning. Not much time to drink, but hell enough to fuck.

The only thing on his mind as he turned into the parking lot were a pair of long legs wrapped tight around his waist, dark hair falling over him in a silken curtain and grey eyes heavy lidded with desire.

They hit the doors ready for action. Darius immediately scanned the crowded dance floor and bar, searching for one particular woman, and felt the pang of disappointment as the search came up empty.

“Looking for me, lover?”

Both Darius and Simon turned as one, facing the one woman Darius hoped to find. Her dark hair fell in a soft curtain past her shoulders her gaze sparkling with amusement. Oh, hell yeah, he needed this, needed her with him down and dirty and his friend in the middle of it with him.

Simon’s eyes narrowed, suspicion open in his gaze. “How did you know we would be back?”

Morgan smiled, flashing even white teeth. “I remember telling you I’d be around.”

The exotic scent of her perfume enveloped Darius, and he breathed her in, growing hard instantly. He heard Simon’s low hum of appreciation and knew it was time to party.

Her gaze darkened with interest as she looked at the two of them. “Gentlemen, I think we need to take this to a more private setting. Don’t you agree?”

* * * *

Gwen couldn’t take the torment of being confined in her room a minute more with only her memories to plague her, not to mention what she now categorized as
the kiss
Arthur planted on her earlier. Gwen felt decidedly needy. She wanted more of his kisses and many other things, too. Not a healthy thing to obsess on, but dear Hecate, the man curled her toes, leaving her a panting messy puddle on the floor. Her body flushed, nipples puckering against the soft material of her sweater, remembering how his hands moved over her body.

No, don’t’ even go there.

She needed to get her priorities in order, and first up, to get out of this place, run far away as fast as she could. Leaving her room, she crept down the long hallway, her sneakers silent, remembering the way Andrea led her only hours before. It seemed to take forever to get to the large rec room, but in reality, it must have been only moments. She swept her gaze over the empty room with relief. The last thing she needed was another face to face with Arthur, or any of his men, for that matter.

Six doors stood in the circular room, all evenly spaced, identical to each other and only one would lead her to freedom. Which one though? She remembered going through the one directly on her left. A small shudder went through her, remembering the hostility of the men and Viviane’s attack. No, she wouldn’t be going that way.

Squaring her shoulders, she picked the farthest door across from her, quickening her steps as she crossed the room. Her heartbeat thumped against her rib cage urging her to go faster. Gwen’s breath turned ragged. Anxiety seized her lungs and perspiration beaded on her forehead. Her pulse kept beat for the one word swirling in her head.

Run, run, runrunrun…

Reaching for the doorknob, she nearly screamed when it turned on its own. She quickly jumped back, heart crawling up her throat as she watched the door swing open, finding herself facing the one person besides Arthur she truly never wanted to see again in this life or any other.

Lancelot seemed equally surprised to see her, giving her the time she needed to gather her wits. “Um…hi there, I was just going out for a while.” She groaned inwardly at the sound of her weak and breathless voice.

She hid a grimace of disgust as she eyed him.
Way to go, Gwen, why not just tell him what you’re up to.

By the expression on his face, he knew exactly what she was up to. Damn it to hell, she never could lie convincingly.

“I am afraid that would be a serious mistake.”

Gwen stiffened and glared up at him. “Am I to be kept against my will then?”

“If it means you are safe and out of Vance’s hands, then yes.”

Frustration to be so close yet thwarted of her quick escape filled her. “You of all people should be glad to get rid of me. Why are you doing this?”

Lancelot blinked in surprise at her accusation. “I have never wished ill of you, Gwen, why would you think that?”

“Because whatever
your
precious Arthur wants, you will move heaven or hell to see he gets it,” she accused, bitterness lacing her words.

“There was a time when you, too, would have done anything to keep Arthur’s favor.”

“That was lifetimes ago. Now I just need to learn to live with the ghosts of my past.” An aching sadness echoed in her words, recalling her lives with vivid intensity, threatening to drag her under. The heavy weight was almost too much to bear.

Could she live with the guilt of what she did and lost? So far…no.

All the times she tried to keep Arthur’s attention, to get his love. And then there was Lancelot. Standing before her once again, now the two images superimposed upon each other, and she blinked hard to erase the double image.

“You are not alright, Lady Gwen. You have been through much this night and need rest.”

She closed her eyes against the onslaught of images and fought the sudden weakness in her legs. She needed to get a handle on this and needed to do it
now
. “I must leave, Lancelot. If you want what’s good for Arthur, then you will stand aside and let me walk out that door.”

“It is not just for Arthur you need to stay. You also must come to terms with the past and perhaps then you can forgive Arthur for I know you still love him, you always have.”

Her eyes snapped open in surprise. Just what she needed, an ex-lover who thinks he’s Freud? She was
so
not going there and didn’t have the time or energy to be analyzed and definitely couldn’t mix the L word and Arthur in the same sentence.

Gwen evaded the white elephant in the room. “What about us? I recall your declarations of undying love for me on several occasions.”

Sadness shadowed his gaze, and she wanted to kick herself for being such a bitch. Without a word, he took her hands in his larger ones and led her to a large leather sofa. As she sat on the soft cushions, he crouched down beside her, his eyes riveted on her.

Oh, boy, by the look on his face she was in for a deep serious discussion, something she had very little time for. As she watched him sigh, she saw her chance at escape dwindle.

Damn it to the nine levels of hell, she really didn’t want to do this.

“I was very young and foolish in many ways back then. Yes, I did think I loved you, or I should say I convinced myself I did. You were so alone and vulnerable then. Arthur did his best, but the demands of a King outweighed the needs of the man.”

He hung his head, his hair. A glossy dark curtain fell forward, obscuring his face. “I am ashamed to say I mistook my fondness for you as something deeper than it truly was. My sense of honor got in the way. I was outraged for you. I hope one day you can forgive my callowness. Had I to do it again I would have done so many things differently.”

The earnestness in his deep voice tugged at her heart despite herself. He raised his head and oh, damn him. The pain and regret in his gaze stabbed at her heart as sharp as a blade. How could she be so self-centered, not to realize the hell, he must have gone through all these centuries? She couldn’t resist the urge to stroke a hand lightly over his cheek. She wanted to soothe the hurt she saw etched on his handsome face.

“I am so relieved to hear this, Lancelot. I also got lost in the moment. After so long ignored to find myself the object of a man’s attention was far too tempting to walk away from. Mordred prayed on this weakness, leading me on the road to betraying Arthur. What happened between us was as much his doing as ours, setting us up in a deadly chess game in which we all lost so much.”

Straightening her shoulders, she rose, letting her fingers brush through his hair. “That will not happen a second time. Thanks for being the friend I needed back then, and if you are the friend I need now, you will let me go. For Arthur’s sake, I am nothing but a distraction for him.”

“On that account you are wrong, Gwen.” He gracefully rose to his feet, grasping her hands in his. “I have spent countless years in Avalon waiting for the time I can atone for my sins against Arthur. If I allowed you to leave Arthur would do everything in his power to see you returned safely, even at the risk of his life.”

“Well, that explains why you look exactly the same, and the way you talk.” Gwen gave him a small smile. “But on this topic, I think we need to agree to disagree.”

“Well, well am I intruding on a touching reunion?” Viviane’s voice cut between them, sharp as a finely honed blade.

Lancelot dropped Gwen’s hands as she whirled around to confront the goddess. “It isn’t what you think, Viviane,” Lancelot defended.

“Oh, then would you care to tell me what I
think
it is?”

“It’s two old friends clearing the air,” Gwen spoke up first, giving Lancelot no chance to speak. “Not that it’s any of your business Viviane.”

“You’ve become insolent in this life. Have a care to who you are talking to,” Viviane warned.

“No, I’ve become wiser,” Gwen argued back. “I made a mistake in my past, but that mistake
will not
control me any longer. Part of healing is making amends when one can.”

Viviane’s smile never reached her eyes. “Is that truly what you are doing? From here it looked to be so much more.” She raised an imperious hand to halt Gwen from speaking. “I’m not interested in anything you have to say. My job is to protect Arthur and all who are under this roof. I remember quite clearly when you threw your lot in with Mordred, believing his lies. Now, here we are again, and once again, he is pursuing you.”

Gwen gritted her teeth, her hands fisting at her sides as she tried her damndest to keep her anger from getting the better of her. How many times must she be reminded of her stupidity in trusting Mordred? And to think she would do so again even if he wore a different name and body was beyond infuriating. “So you think history will repeat itself? Wow, you sure have a low opinion of me, don’t you?”

“Enough of this, Viviane, we are friends and nothing more.” Lancelot moved closer to Viviane, a puzzling frown marring his handsome face. “I have never seen you like this before, Viviane. Gwen has done nothing to receive the barbed end of your tongue.”

In that moment as Viviane gazed up at Lancelot, Gwen knew the real reason for her animosity. Shocked it took her this long to realize that Viviane loved Lancelot. She wondered if anyone else knew of the feelings she harbored for the man. Feeling much like a third wheel, she inched her way to the door.

“Um…I’m just going to take a walk down to the beach. I think you two have a few things to talk out.” Gwen heard Lancelot’s warning call to her, but she ignored him, whirling around for the door. She opened it and face planted into a very hard broad chest.

Fingers bit into her arms to steady her. “What the hell are you up to now?”

Her eyes flew up to Arthur’s suspicious gaze, and she bit her lip with sudden frustration. She should have read her cards this morning, and perhaps she could have prevented this scenario from playing out.

Yeah, like hiding in bed with the covers over my head.

Though she knew deep inside it would be no use to say anything, she couldn’t stop her mouth from opening, and the words poured out, “I just wanted to go for a walk on the beach to clear my head and ran into Lancelot.”

“And I broke up what looked to be quite a tender moment between the two of them.” Viviane’s spiteful words hit the mark as she watched Arthur’s expression darken with rage.

“It’s not what you think,” Gwen defended, hating the feeling of déjà vu which sank into her with insidious clarity. She said those same words long ago. The only difference was now, they were the truth.

“As I told Viviane,” Lancelot interjected calmly, frowning at the goddess. “She was going for a walk when I happened to come in. We talked and made amends for the foolishness of the past. We are no longer the people we once were. We’ve grown and learned from our mistakes. If you can’t trust her, then how can you trust me?”