There All Along (13 page)

“I packed already. Will you walk me out?” He took her hand, wanting it to be known that she was his. All the talk about her lack of choices and it possibly driving her to another man had stirred something up inside and he needed to soothe it before he got in that vehicle and was trapped for the next four hours until they got back to Shelter City.

And he wanted to reassure her as well. He knew she remained unsettled. Knew she’d wanted more than he could give just then. But he wanted to give her as much as he possibly could, hating to leave with anything unsettled between them.

He’d never really had concern for much more than his badge and his crew. Something deep had unleashed and flowed into the rest of his consciousness with the sort of completeness that felt like it had been part of him forever. Belonging. He belonged to her. He hated the idea of her unhappiness in a way he couldn’t have imagined even just half an annum prior.

Whatever it was, he was old enough to accept it for what it was. It’d be stupid to fight it. He wanted her so he’d take the good and the bad along with it.

“I have to get down to the mercantile anyway. Constance won’t be there to help. I’ve spoke with a few others who work for me off and on through the annum when we get real busy. But there’ll be a crush now that the horns have sounded and folks know you’re all leaving.”

He kissed her again, taking his time.

“I’ll be at the escort before you all leave though. I promise.”

He kissed her before he grabbed his satchel and they headed out.

•   •   •

S
ilver Cliffs was buzzing with activity. After the restrictions of the last days and the fear of the brigands, people had places to go and things to do. There was a line up already at the mail window.

And on the porch in front of the mercantile Loyal pulled her close and laid another kiss on her right out in front of god and everyone. It left her breathless and a little weak in the knees.

“I’ll see you in a bit then.”

She watched him amble away, unable to hide her smile of appreciation.

“He does cut a fine figure going as well as coming,” one of the elderly women said as she made her way up the steps heading into the mercantile.

Verity laughed. “Yes, ma’am, he surely does.”

She worked a steady shift, taking and bundling mail and packages until she closed up and headed into the store. The crowd had thinned. Tobin nodded toward the door to the loading bay. All the mail was on a rolling cart she needed to get out back. But she wanted to check in with everyone first.

“Been stacking up orders, barter goods and the like near the bay doors.”

“Thank you. I’ll go be sure it gets on the transport.”

She headed through the back and took a moment, standing in the dim behind a tall shelf to find her breath and gather herself.

She hated the fact that he’d be gone again in just a while. Hated that her life would slide back into that place it was before he’d arrived. Worse, she supposed since things had gotten so serious between them. Since she’d delivered an ultimatum and he’d taken it seriously.

If he decided to say no, or came back and tried to push for things to remain as they were, what would she do? She’d use the next break before he came back to really think on her options.

But for right then she’d do her job and also see him off. Store up all the last moments she could before he disappeared like smoke.

When she walked out into the brighter space, she pushed the loading bay doors all the way open and waved at the transport driver. “Ready to load up.”

It was quick work from then on. Part of their routine in each garrison. She handed things off and smiled sideways at Loyal when he hopped up beside her and pitched in.

“We’re off then. Heading back to Shelter City. Going to do some quick check-ins at the garrisons on the way, make sure everyone is safe.”

She nodded, hoping her fear for him didn’t show too much.

He pulled her into a hug and she went, squeezing him tight, breathing him in. “Come back to me,” she whispered.

“I promise. You stay safe. Keep up the target practice. Stay ready, and if they come and you can’t hold them off, you get your pretty butt to that exit in the wall you showed me. In fact, I want you to take some supplies out there. Just store them in the space and if you have to run, you can. Or use the bolt-hole. Either way, be prepared to get out if and when you have to.”

That was a very good idea actually. She nodded. “I know the back country well. I can head up into the mountains.”

“Good girl.” He broke the hug but kept her hand until he jumped down and then grabbed her waist and swung her down next to him, taking her hand again as they walked to his vehicle.

“Safe travels, lawman.”

“Safe travels, milady.” He slid into the seat and strapped himself in after he’d locked his weapon into the slot on the dash where he could reach it easily in an emergency. His face had lost the softness he’d worn for her and took on the wariness he’d need for the road.

She trailed to the gate as they drove away before she headed back up the hill to the mercantile to work her days through until he returned.

A
s they hit the Highway back to Shelter City they had a fairly quiet first hour or two. Loyal pushed thoughts of her from his head as he did the job. After a bit it became clear they were riding in the wake of a band of brigands. Whether it was the leftovers from the group that had attempted the siege on Silver Cliffs or not, he didn’t know.

“You see this?” he spoke into the headset that connected him to the other vehicles in the escort.

They’d been ambushed before. Caution was a necessary thing out there on the Highway. But they couldn’t just drive past without checking for survivors.

Indigo answered. “Yeah. I don’t know how far behind them we are.”

“The engine on that truck ahead is still smoking. It can’t be that far at all,” Stace added.

A snarl of vehicles littered the roadside. The tires had been blown, the windows broken. Loyal knew there’d be parts missing from the engines and whatever else could be stripped that the brigands might have needed.

There was no sign that people remained and most likely there wouldn’t be. Brigands took slaves or killed everyone. They didn’t leave much behind.

“Trinity, Marcus, you two ease up. I’m going to pull over. I want to be sure we don’t have survivors.”

He got out his field glasses and checked out the treeline. They had heat tech so he could see body signatures, even if they were invisible to the naked eye. Nothing but some small game, which was a good sign there weren’t any brigands around.

He flashed his lights and let the rest know what he was going to do, popping the catch on his shotgun and easing from his vehicle.

The men in the transport truck had a mounted gun and once they stopped, everyone was on full alert. Indigo pulled up and got out, giving Loyal coverage.

Burning rubber and metal, blood, the stench of it never failed to clench in his belly. He’d gotten past the wanting to vomit part, but the juxtaposition of blood against the glitter of shattered glass glittering in the sun made a sort of aching, violent beauty.

Blood led him to the bodies. Three adult males with offensive and defensive wounds. So they’d gone down fighting at least.

The central government didn’t approve of private traffic on the Highway, but it wasn’t prohibited. There would always be people who wanted to do their own thing. He understood that sense of freedom and independence. Sometimes people wanted to holiday down in Shelter City. Or they moved from one garrison to another.

This group though—he looked around—were traders most likely, from the looks of the shells of the vehicles left on the road. Commerce made the world go round.

“Anything?” Indigo approached, his gaze shifting as he remained on watch.

“No. Let’s take care of these bodies.”

They had powder that would disintegrate the bodies. All lawmen transports carried it. Leaving dead bodies around encouraged disease. The powder got rid of the attractive and yet deadly target for predators and illness.

It took ten minutes to clean up. Ten minutes to erase the existence of these men, whoever they were. Fathers, husbands, brothers, sons.

A fucking waste.

“Let’s go. We got some roadway to make up. Be on the alert, we may roll up on them as they’re in action.” He turned the engine over and the ferocious rumble slid up his spine. He didn’t need to tell them to shoot to kill or anything of the like. They knew what to do. It was always the same.

You couldn’t bargain with brigands. Couldn’t take them in as prisoners. It was a waste of time and money, of space in the jails. There was one way to deal with brigands and that was to kill them. Period.

They tore up the Highway toward Shelter City. It loomed ahead, shimmering like a dream. If they didn’t encounter any trouble, they’d be rolling up to the outer gates in less than an hour.

But of course, ifs were what they were and as they rounded a hairpin curve heading up a steep incline, Bren’s voice barked over the comm system.

“Company about a click back.”

Shit. They could probably run for it. The brigands would most likely peel away from a chase once they got a little closer to Shelter City where there’d be a higher chance of a patrol and they’d be vastly outnumbered and outgunned.

But they’d have to haul ass with a transport vehicle full of goods.

“Lead them around this corner. If we’re clear, get the transport to the rear as we turn to head them off. Vests on. I’ve just sent a signal to Shelter City operations to let them know we’re about to engage the enemy.”

Once they’d cleared the turn and there was no sign of an ambush, the transport vehicle, with Indigo and Marcus on either side, pushed past Loyal, who spun his vehicle and got out.

Time seemed to slow down then.

All the training in the world can’t prepare a man for this moment. When everything feels slowed down and sped up all at once. When all he’d really have was instinct and hope that his will to survive was greater than his opponent’s.

He flipped the holster on his thigh open and chambered a round for the shotgun as he moved to the center of the Highway.

The surface of the roadway beneath his feet vibrated as he took a deep breath to center himself. Indigo and Stace fanned right and left. He knew the transport had pulled all the extra shielding into place and the gunner would have his weapon aimed.

Trinity’s footsteps, along with Marcus as they all got into place.

There were no pithy sayings. No hoots or calls to arms.

They all stood and waited until the brigands came around that corner. His muscles burned from the way he held himself until he forced them to relax. This was what he was born to do and he would do it.

Going to one knee, Loyal allowed himself a smile as he aimed and shot out the front right tire and then the left.

The tanklike vehicle lost control and sailed off the Highway into the ravine that ran to the west of the Highway.

“Two more to go.”

They came again, around the corner, no slower than the first vehicle.

Bullets peppered the roadway at Loyal’s feet as he jerked his attention away from the blacktop to the van barreling toward them.

Still standing, Marcus took aim and shot out the windshield as Trinity took out the driver with a head shot. The last vehicle slammed into the back, sending them both skidding sideways.

Loyal hardened his heart as he pulled a pin and tossed a grenade into the gaping hole the windshield used to occupy.

They turned and went to one knee as the explosion sounded behind them and heat crawled over his back.

He turned again, standing, giving Trinity cover as she and Marcus headed to the next vehicle to finish everyone off.

“No civilians,” Trinity said as she came back. “Everyone else neutralized.”

But that was too good to be true as shots rained down from above.

“Sniper.” They all headed for cover as the gunman on the transport aimed and gave them some time to get safe by shooting into the heavily forested ridge where the shots had come from.

“On it,” Stace called out, shouldering his weapon and jogging into the treeline. Marcus followed, his rifle in his hands.

There’d be no more random shooting into the ridge above. They couldn’t risk hitting their people. So for many breathless minutes they waited until the sound of a firefight drifted down.

As they cruised back through the first ring of gates around Shelter City, Loyal realized it was going to be a longer day than he’d thought.

“Head straight to defense HQ,” the guard told Loyal.

The transport went in a different direction but now that they were in the city, they’d be fine. Loyal and his crew headed south, to the sprawling and heavily armed grounds of the defense headquarters.

•   •   •

T
he days slid into a week and then two. Life slipped back into routine. She normally had time with Constance, but her sister had frozen her out. An official blip came for Tobin, saying he’d been selected for the next training sequence and an official transport would collect him. It announced he’d qualified for a scholarship that would cover his room, board and tuition.

It also announced that the next sequence had been delayed by at least two moons because of rising tensions on some parts of the Highway with the brigands. While she was thrilled for Tobin, Verity also knew it would delay the opportunity to see Loyal again. Which had only underlined her position and the need to make a move one way or another when he made his way back to Silver Cliffs once more.

A positive was that despite the blip and his decision to go to Shelter City, Tobin had made peace with his parents and was back living at home instead of sleeping on a cot in her blip office.

But that blip, while not shoving Tobin further from his parents, had been a huge issue between them and Verity.

Despite the differences in their lifestyle and beliefs, Verity and her sister had always made an effort to be part of each other’s life. She had dinner with her family at least once a week, babysat the younger boys, took them on hikes and the like.

But her sister’s husband seemed to feel Tobin’s wanting to go to academy was something Verity had done to them on purpose. A way to harm them and wrest their son from the house.

She’d tried—once—to speak with him about it. He’d been hard faced and angry and had told her she was no longer welcome in his home and to leave his family alone.

To have pushed Constance would have put her sister in a bad place. She didn’t want to make her sister’s family life harder, even if she was angry. The last thing she wanted was to prove them right and actually work to bring disharmony to their family.

Still, Verity had expected her sister to at the very least try to speak with her about it, but Constance had patently avoided the mercantile and any contact and she felt that absence acutely.

Loyal was gone and things were clearly heating up outside the walls. Instead of the more regular deliveries he’d said to expect, they gotten less official transport with mail and goods and more military patrols passed through.

There wasn’t much else to do but work to keep saving credits and to give herself something to do so when she fell into her bed every night she was too exhausted to think about anything.

It hadn’t been all bad. She’d hired on extra help at the mercantile. She couldn’t count on her sister anymore and Tobin would be leaving. She hoped to be as well, so it was a necessary thing.

Ruth Hannigan was a little older than Verity was. Married, but no children. Her husband had a herd of sheep and often traded the wool. She loomed beautiful textiles and had helped out on occasion during busy times.

Ruth took to full-time work easily. Learning quickly, working efficiently. They had the beginning of a good friendship already, but the concentrated time together deepened that. Giving Verity a place to go when she’d been rejected by Constance.

Verity found herself at the Hannigan’s table several times a week. Sometimes for tea and a chat with Ruth, other times for meals. Jackson Haldeman was their neighbor and he also ended up at the table.

He walked her home from time to time and she liked his company. But he wasn’t Loyal. Could she settle with him though? Could she let Jackson court her and be his wife if Loyal didn’t bring her an answer she could live with?

Only, she realized, if she could truly make a commitment to him or it wouldn’t be fair. She didn’t like living half a life, she most surely couldn’t ask anyone else to do the same because she pined for a man she couldn’t have.

It felt disloyal to even think on that. Disloyal to the man she was in love with. But as Ruth had pointed out reality was reality. She couldn’t
not
think about her future in Silver Cliffs if things didn’t work out either.

But she kept a firm space between herself and Jackson. A
friends only
space. She didn’t want to lead him on or give him false hope. She wanted Loyal. Wanted a chance at a life with him.

They talked about all manner of things, but any time he moved too close to that moat, the place only belonging to Loyal, she gently, but firmly, pushed him back.

She stood on her porch with him after he’d walked her back. They’d had a rousing card game with Ruth and Garner and several other neighbors of different genders and ages.

“Been a while since the lawman came around.”

She arched a brow at him. “You’ve seen the blips too. You know they’re busy in the south with the brigands.”

“What if he doesn’t come back, Verity? Have you given any thought to that?”

She sighed as she moved to sit in one of the chairs. “He promised he’d be back. So he will.”

“I know you’re in love with him. And I saw how he looked at you. So I believe he’ll be back if he can.”

The last three words echoed in the near silent evening. The reality of what he did was something she lived with daily.

“If things don’t work out with you and him, would you let me come around? Court you?”

She sighed. “I don’t want to give you false hope. It’s not fair. I love Loyal. I want to be with him.”

“I respect that. You’re a beautiful woman. Smart and independent. Man’d be lucky to have you at his side, is all I’m saying. I’d like it to be me if things don’t work out. I waited, you see. I saw what James did to you. How you suffered. But he never broke you. When he ended up dead and you were free I told myself you weren’t ready and I didn’t want to push. But then Loyal came around and turned your head at the same time. I waited too long.”

“You’re a good man. Handsome. Charming. You’re not a brute. You have a job, a nice piece of land. There are plenty of feminine glances your way when you walk up and down the hill. There’s a woman for you here in Silver Cliffs.”

He snorted. “Just so happens she’s in love with someone else.” His smile was rueful and tenderness flooded her at that admission.

“She is. But that doesn’t mean she can’t recognize what a catch you are for the right woman. This one? I can only offer you friendship. I like having you in my life. But I can’t offer more than that.”

He nodded. But she knew how he thought now. Had seen him play cards. Jackson Haldeman was a fan of the long game. He’d made a mistake in waiting, he thought—though he’d been right, she wouldn’t have been ready for the first year or two after James’ murder—but it wasn’t a mistake he’d make again if he got the chance.