'Til Death (5 page)

Culprit

I was extremely bored. I was sitting there, blowing a blunt and watching Sports Center on TV. I was out of the game; the streets didn’t need me anymore. I didn’t have a female or anything to occupy my time. Every day for two years, I had gotten up, cooked breakfast, worked out, played the game, or gone to shoot some hoops, then returned to my house to cook, smoke, drink, and sleep. Those hoes out there hadn’t even caught my attention. I wanted a woman; a grown-ass woman, though the women I wanted didn’t want me. Then, there was Lorean Jensen. Lo and I dated when we were eighteen. We dated for four years, but I broke her heart. I had changed her into the woman she became. Every time she came around me, she didn’t speak; she acted like I wasn’t even there. I hadn't gone front; that shit hurt for real. But then again, who was I to blame her? I
fucked-up
, she didn’t.

In the last year of our relationship, Lo got pregnant by me. I never was the family type. I grew up not knowing my father, and I had to live with the fact that my mother abandoned me at a young age. Boan's mother practically raised me as her own. I was terrified about Lo’s pregnancy, and told Lo to abort it, and she did. After that, she changed; she was sad and depressed all the time, and instead of me being there, I cheated. The bitch that I fucked ended up getting pregnant too, and I told her to do the same thing. Ol' girl aborted the baby, but ended up telling Lo. Lo came and asked me about it of course, and I told her the truth.

I expected her to yell or hit me. I was expecting something totally different than what happened. Lo cried. She just cried her soul out, and I’d never witnessed anything so hurtful and beautiful at the same time. I was stuck; I didn’t know what to say. Lo cried for hours, and finally got up and walked out. I knew she wasn’t coming back. I sat in the same spot and I cried. I didn’t even bother to wipe my tears. That night was four years ago, and since then I'd been with other chicks, but none of them lasted; they were just a quick fix, something imaginary since I couldn’t have the real thing. Now I wanted her back. I needed her back. I was about to turn the channel, when I heard a knock on my door. I wasn’t expecting company, so it kind of threw me off. I sat up and muted the TV. I heard the knock again, and this time, it was harder. I got up and made my way to the door and opened it. This nigga turned his tall ass around and stared at me. I just shook my head.

              "You gone let me in or what?" Boan asked.

I opened up the door wider, and he walked in. I followed him to the kitchen and sat at the table. Boan grabbed a beer out of the ‘fridge and leaned against the counter.

              "So where you been at?" I asked. Boan had been my main nigga since the sandbox. We came into the game together, even fucked the same bitches. We killed for each other. Boan was my brother, and the fact that he couldn’t trust me kind of pissed me off.

              "Not dead." He snapped.

              "Well, that’s obvious," I said.

Boan nodded, and sipped his beer. "So what happened?" Boan asked me.

I pulled a “Black and Mild” out of my pocket and lit it. "What exactly are you asking me?"

              "Culprit, you know what I’m fucking asking you."

              "No the fuck I don’t. Boan, how long we been boys? How the fuck you gone sit up in my kitchen and point the finger at me?" I stated, shocked they he even expect me to have something to do with what went down between him and Ciara.

              "I’m not pointing any fingers. I’m asking a simple question. Why you getting so hype, you got a guilty conscience?"

              "Perhaps that's something you need to ask your wife." I knew that shit was a low blow, but this nigga got me
fucked up
.

Boan stared at me for a while. I knew he wanted to punch me in my mouth, but he wouldn't. We had too much respect for each other to come to blows.

              "Culprit, I got too much respect for you to be giving you the runaround. Listen, dawg, just tell me what the fuck happened
.
"

              "Boan, I don’t know what the fuck happened. All I know is, after you got shot and woke up, I dropped you off, and then I went home. I woke up the next day and tried to call you, but your shit kept going to voicemail. So I began to call other people, and they said they didn’t know what the fuck happened to you. I went to the only source that was sure to know something, and that was Ciara. I walk into her warehouse and I got guns in my face so I’m thinking this shit was a fucking set-up. Then Ciara come out of nowhere talking to Tez telling that fuck nigga that she was going to give him the business."

              "All of it?" Boan asked.

              "All of it."

              "What did Tez have to do?"

              "Tez had to leave me and you alone. He couldn’t do shit to me, and he couldn’t go looking or doing shit to you. That nigga said, “Cool,” so now he running Detroit. I pulled Ciara to the side and asked her what happened to you and she said you just left." Boan stared at me, and looked at me hard.

              "So you really didn’t have anything to do with shit?" Boan asked.

              "Boan, you my fucking brother, man, what the fuck I look like, turning my back on you?"

Boan nodded, and walked over to me and dapped me up. "All right, we good," Boan said.             

I nodded my head. "So what happened?"

              "Basically, Ciara was supposed to kill me, and her and Tez was supposed to take the drug game over and run Detroit, but she couldn’t do it, and ended up letting me go. I went to Alabama for a while to get my mind right and shit. I only came back because I got tired of running from shit, plus, that ain’t me." He explained.

              "Well, all is forgotten when it’s in the past, my dude. But it’s a party tonight, so you want to hit it up?"

              "What club?" He finally showed some form of excitement when I mentioned a club.

              "This new club called “Feisty,” but I heard that bitch be rocking though." I smiled knowing he'll be down for a good party.

              "Yea, but I got to hit the mall first." He looked down at what he had on and shook his head.

              I couldn't help but to laugh. "I’ll roll with you," I said.

I grabbed my keys and followed Boan out of my crib. I stayed on Woodhall, off of Chandler Park Dr., on the east side of Detroit. I’d stayed over there since I was twenty. We hit up Partridge Creek Mall in Clinton Township, and cashed out. Boan had been driving a rental, but we stopped at a car dealership and Boan bought a brand new Range Rover and drove it off the lot. We went back to my crib and put all his shit in the spare bedroom. I didn’t mind if my nigga stayed there for a while. I knew he really didn’t want to stay with his mom.

We went our separate ways and got ready for the evening. We drove my brand new Corvette to the club and pulled up stunting. Boan had on all black, and tried to stay as low key as possible. Security looked at me and let me straight through. I told them Boan was with me, since they didn’t recognize him. We walked up the stairs to V.I.P. The V.I.P. rooms were made out of glass, and we could see down to the lower-level. The V.I.P. section practically was its own club with its own bar and dance floor, but it was more of a chill spot. Boan tapped my arm and I looked to where he was looking. Ciara, Lo, and Tosh were making their way to V.I.P. I looked at Boan, who had already downed his Henny and was ordering another glass. I looked back at Lo, who was looking so damn sexy. She had her long hair out of the braid; her hair was down her back; it was thick, wavy, and shiny. I remembered how I used to run my fingers through it, and it was so soft. It was like I had my own personal cloud in my hands. She had on a baby-blue dress with some high-ass stilettos on her feet. The dress hugged her just right, making her full breasts and soft, round ass looks nice. My mouth started to water. I sipped my Hennessey and shook my head. They walked over to us, and Tosh and Ciara spoke to me. Lo just stood there and looked like she was bored. I felt my heart breaking, piece by piece.

Boan

All of them were looking good, to be honest. Tosh had on all white, and was ready to party. Ciara was looking so fucking sexy, and I felt my dick getting hard. Funny thing was, Ciara had on all black, and so did I. I had my snapback fitted, pulled low over my eyes. I knew Ciara was staring at me. I adjusted my cap and looked at her. She had on a fucking black leather bustier with some black booty shorts and thigh-high boots. The thigh-high boots were red-bottoms. Ciara's hair was down, and I wanted to run my fingers through it. I looked at Tosh and Lo and spoke, then I walked around Ciara and gave them a hug. Ciara grabbed the back of my black V-neck shirt and I turned around.

              "What?" I exaggerated.

              "So you just gone ignore me?" Ciara ask.

I looked into her light brown eyes, and I could tell she was getting mad. I was feeling the Henny, and I was feeling the fuck out of her outfit. "Hi, Ciara," I said. I downed the rest of my drink and ordered another. I looked at Culprit, who was trying his best not to look at Lo. I looked at Lo, who looked extremely uncomfortable. We were all fucked-up in the head. Ciara was about to walk away, but I grabbed her hand.

              "Come here." I licked my lips at her and smiled. Her boots boosted her height to 5’8, but I was 6’3, and I still towered over her. I pulled her close to me for a hug, and she smelled so good. My hand went to her ass. She put her hands on my chest and tried to push me away, but instead, I pulled her closer and kissed her neck.

              "Boan, you’re drunk." Her face was in my neck causing her voice to sound muffled.

              "No, I’m not. I’m horny," I admitted, while laughing. I heard somebody clear their throat and I looked up. Ciara turned around and I wrapped my arms around her waist and pulled her towards my erection. I looked straight at Clay's face.

              "Boan?"

              "What?" I wasn't interested in having a conversation with him, and was trying to keep it brief.

              "Damn, I didn’t know you were back in the city." Clay yelled over the music.

              "Why would you?" I snapped at him. I didn’t fuck with Clay, and he knew that. He looked at me, and then he looked back at Ciara. I looked around, and realized that Culprit, Lo, and Tosh had disappeared. Clay looked from me to Ciara one last time, smiled nodded his head and walked off. I put my drink down and ran my fingers through Ciara's soft hair.

              "I like your new hairstyle." I mentioned to her.

              "And I like yours."

I turned Ciara around, and she wrapped her arms around my neck. She took off my hat and ran her fingers over my waves. I leaned down and kissed her. Ciara pressed harder against me, and I sucked her bottom lip in my mouth. Both of my hands were on her ass. I was ready to fuck the dog shit out of her. Ciara leaned back to catch her breath. I grabbed her hair gently, and pulled her head back to expose her neck. I kissed and sucked on her neck. I stopped and looked at her, and she looked at me. She bit her bottom lip and her eyelids began to get low. From that look on her face, I knew she was wet. I looked around to see if anybody noticed us. I saw Clay at the DJ booth, and had this strange feeling. I let go of Ciara and walked over to the clear glass. The DJ was a female, and she looked up to where Clay was pointing. She looked directly at me. Fuck.

              "YO!!! Hold up. Gotta give a shout-out to the biggest fucking boss here tonight. BOAN!!!! He’s back!" the DJ said. There was a huge light shining on me. I reached for my hat, then I remember that Ciara had taken it off. The song that came on was "Homegurl" by this dude name Bone. I just shook my head and laughed. Fuck it. I walked to where the glass door opened and stood on the balcony. The spotlight was still on me. I went into my pocket and began throwing hundreds in the crowd. I wasn't low-key anymore, so I figured I might as well make it rain. I looked at Clay and stuck my middle finger up. Ciara came out on the balcony and stood next to me. I was about to throw some more money out, but she stopped me.

              "What exactly are you trying to prove?" Ciara asked.

I just stared at her in shock. The Ciara I knew would have been throwing her money out too. Instead, she looked at me like she was disappointed, and walked back to the booth. I followed her and closed the door. I felt somebody's arms wrap around my waist and I thought it was Ciara. I turned around and came face to face with Sky.

              "What’s up?" I leaned down and gave her a hug, but she didn’t let me go.

              ''Shit," I said. I looked around, and my eyes fell on Lo. Fuck.

              "What you doing later, after this?" Sky asked.

              "I don’t know yet."

              "Well, I can give you something to do."

              "Damn, and what is that?" I asked, while looking at her.

              "Yea, what the fuck is that?" Ciara intervened. Sky turned around and looked at Ciara.

              "I wasn’t talking to you," Sky said.

Ciara didn’t say anything, and just hauled off and slapped the shit out of Sky, as if Sky were her daughter. "Bitch, I don’t give a fuck who you was talking to," Ciara declared. Ciara was about to kick Sky in the face with her heel, but I scooped Ciara up in my arms and pulled her away.

              "Yo! Chill out!" I said. Security made their way to us and grabbed Sky before she could run-up on Ciara. I carried Ciara out of the club and sat her down.

              "How the fuck you just gone disrespect me like that, Boan?" Ciara asked, while looking up at me.

              "Man, shut the fuck up." I waved Ciara off not trying to hear her bullshit.

              "Fuck you, Boan."

Culprit, Lo, and Tosh finally made their way outside. The valet pulled up with Culprit's Corvette and a clean-ass Jag behind it.

              "Who’s Jaguar?" I asked.

              "Mine," Lo answered.

              "Well Culprit, can I get your keys and I’ll take Ciara home, and y’all can drop Culprit off?" I asked.

              "No," Lo said immediately. We all looked at her except for Culprit. I dug into my pocket and pulled out a stack of hundreds and showed them to Lo.

              "How about now?"

              "No," Lo said, with the same stern face. I looked at Culprit, who had a stale expression on his face. I walked up to Lo and leaned close to her ear.

              "Come on; don’t make this nigga look lame doing this. We all get it; he hurt you, but somewhere I know you care. Please, just drop him off," I whispered to her. I leaned up and looked at her.

              "Fine." They made their way to the car, and Culprit was walking like a dog with his tail tucked between his legs. I shook my head and walked towards the 'Vette. Ciara got in and slammed the car door.

              "Don’t slam the car door," I said.

              "Just shut the fuck up and drop me off at home."

              "Who the fuck you talking to?" I questioned, while smiling.

              "You, Barren," Ciara answered, while looking at me.

              "I guess you mad," I said, while laughing. I sped off, away from the curve.

              "I moved."

              "You sold the place?" I asked in shock while looking at her. She just shrugged her shoulders instead of responding to me.

              “Where you stay?”

Ciara told me she moved into this condo off of Parker. We drove over there in silence. I had said that when I had come back here, I was going to be done with Ciara. She was my wife, and I’d been with her for years. To say that I loved her was an understatement; it was more than love, and deeper. It was a lifestyle. Ciara was my lifestyle. I chose her, and I didn’t regret my decision. We could have made it work, but I was tired. She pointed to her place; it was the middle one. I walked to the door with her. Her porch light was on and something reflected off the light. I looked at her left hand, and I saw the wedding ring that I had bought her. She still wore it. I looked at my left hand. I had taken mine off my hand, and instead was wearing it on a chain around my neck. I walked in behind her and looked around. I walked deeper into the place and found this big-ass piano. Ciara always had been in love with pianos, but never knew how to play. I felt her watching my back. I sat down at the piano and began to play around with it until I got into the groove, then started playing our wedding song, “I Gotta Be,” by Jagged Edge.

              "When did you learn how to play the piano?" Ciara asked me.

              I knew she recognized the song. "When you’ve been gone for two years, you tend to pick up new hobbies." Ciara walked over to me and put her hands on my shoulders. Her hands traveled until they touched my chest. Her head rested on my shoulder. Ciara began kissing me on my neck, and I was trying to act like it didn’t faze me. Ciara took my earlobe in her mouth and began to suck on it. I couldn’t take it anymore. I turned around on the piano bench, and kissed her passionately. Ciara sat down on my lap. I stood up, and she wrapped her legs around my waist.

              "Where is your bedroom?"

              "Upstairs to the left," Ciara said, in between kisses on my neck. I practically ran to her room. I laid her on her bed and began to undress her. I took off my clothes and climbed on top of her. I kissed her gently and flicked her lips with my tongue. I slipped my fingers between her legs and began to play with her clit. Her pussy was dripping wet. I inserted two fingers inside her and pressed my thumb on her clit.

              "Damn . . ." Ciara moaned. I left her mouth and began to suck on her nipples. Ciara was squirming beneath me, but I was just getting started. I found her g-spot and began to apply more pressure on it.

              "Fuck, Boan  . . ." I pulled my fingers out of her, and put them in my mouth. I put my head between her legs and separated her lips. I blew on her clit lightly before I put my mouth on it. She tasted so sweet, like it was bathed in pineapples. I inserted my two fingers back inside her and placed my other hand on her thigh so she wouldn’t go anywhere. I sucked and licked everything that was dripping out of her.

              "Shit . . . Boo . . . Boan, I’m cum . . . cumming," Ciara moaned. Ciara began to shake and quiver. She tried to push me away, but it didn’t work. I kept going until I made her cum again. I looked up at her, and saw tears running down her face. I leaned up on top of her and pushed my dick on her clit.

              "Wait, Boan," Ciara whimpered.

              "Why?" I said. I kissed her and let her taste her juices.

              "I’m sensitive," Ciara whispered. I rubbed my dick up and down her clit. I watched her facial expression. I was trying to take my time, but she was feeling too good. I put the head in and I realized how tight she was. Ciara must have not had sex since I left. I pushed deeper in, then stopped. She clawed at my back.

              "Please, Boan, I need you," Ciara whispered in my neck, and that pushed me over the edge. I pushed all of me in her. Ciara's hands ran gently over my six-pack, and she clenched her pussy muscle on me. I felt chills run over my body. I began to thrust harder, inside of her. Her pussy was so wet that it was making noises that were music to my ears. Ciara took control and pushed me on my back. She tucked her legs under my thighs and leaned all the way back. Somehow, I was deeper inside her moist garden. I reached up and placed both of her full breasts in my hands. I couldn’t take it. I needed them in my mouth. I leaned up and grabbed her ass. I slid her up and down on my dick while I sucked on her nipples.

              "Oh . . . my . . . GOD!" Ciara said. I felt her legs begin to shake, and knew she was cumming again. I began to fuck her harder, and she was giving it back to me. Ciara began to roll her hips and clench at the same time, and I felt my nut rising.

              "Fuck," I said. I turned her on her stomach and penetrated her from the back. Ciara tossed her ass back to me, and I was fucking her full force. One of my hands was squeezing her ass while the other reached around and rubbed her clit.

              "I’m . . . cumming, cum with  . . . me," Ciara moaned. All I heard, smelled, and felt was her. My nut was at its end. She released her orgasm on me, and I pumped my seed into her until I was blinded by pleasure. We laid down, out of breath and laughing. She curled up beside me and began to drift off, but before she did, I heard her say it.

              "I love you, Boan. Forever and always." I didn’t reply, because she was sleep. I eased out of her bed and began to put on my clothes. I looked at her.

              "Always and forever, Ciara." I walked out.

Lo

All the time I was driving, I felt Culprit looking at me. I knew where he stayed; I didn’t need directions to my past. Culprit, whose real name was actually Clarence Andrew Jenkins Jr., was looking so fucking sexy tonight. He had on some gray jeans and a gray V-neck t-shirt with a white cardigan. His gray and white Jordan’s were fresh out of the box, and his snapback fit tightly, covering his hazel eyes. I looked in my rearview mirror and caught him licking his juicy lips. I just shook my head. His brown hair and beard were trimmed to perfection. Anyone who stared at Culprit's light caramel skin long enough could make out the freckles that kissed his nose and flecked his face right below his beautiful eyes. His 6’2 frame was made out of pure muscle, and I couldn’t help but think about that tribal tattoo on his side. Culprit was looking out the window, and I saw the tattoo on his neck, which was of a pair of lips: my lips. I remembered that day; it was our three-year anniversary, before everything had gone straight to hell. I didn’t talk to Culprit anymore. I didn’t talk to him, or about him. That was one door that I was destined to keep closed. My other relationships would never compare to what we had. Yea, I had serious relationships after him, but none of them made me feel complete the way Culprit had. I didn’t know why. I felt as though I was waiting on something, but the sad thing was, I didn’t know exactly what I was waiting on. Culprit broke my spirit. Sometimes, if I thought about it too hard, I would still cry. I chose him over my child, just simply because he asked me to. I was just like my mother; a mother that I couldn’t stand to look at. At a young age, one of her male friends had touched me inappropriately, and she blamed me. I was fourteen; she put me out, and I had to stay with my Aunt. And when I was only fifteen, my Aunt thought I should pay rent, so I had to get a job, along with going to school. By the time I was sixteen, I had enough money, and Ciara and I got our own place. At the time, Ciara was just nickel and diming, before she got heavy into the dope game. I made a promise to myself that I would never choose anybody over my child, but I did. I haven’t heard from my mother, and I still gave my Aunt a little money, but I’d always been on my own since then.