To Mend a Broken Heart (30 page)

BOOK: To Mend a Broken Heart
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I pull back, removing him from my mouth, pressing a kiss to the very tip of him before I speak.

 

“There is nothing sexier to me than pleasing you, Daniel. I want to please you, like you do me so often.”

 

He closes his eyes and takes a deep breath, almost like he is steadying himself. He opens one eye and looks down at me, a small smile on his perfect lips.

 

“Are you trying to kill me? Or make us awfully late for this event of yours?”

 

“Neither. I’m not even in control of myself right now, this is what you do to me,” I tell him, getting to my feet and pressing myself to him, “You make all logic cease to exist. When I’m with you like this, there is only you and me. There is no one else, nothing could stop me being with you.”

 

“That sounds dangerous.”

 

“It sounds like Heaven.
My Heaven.
” I whisper against his mouth, “Now… Make love to me.”

 

He picks me up, taking me by surprise and carries me over to the dresser, placing me on top of it. The bottles of perfume I have neatly lined up on there clanging together and wobbling precariously close to the edge. Without taking his eyes off me, he reaches out and pushes the bottles back to a safe distance before reaching down to pull my knickers to the side. The act seems so incredibly sexy, so visceral, like he cannot bear to waste time removing them, like he has to be buried inside me this instant, that it sends a wave or arousal crashing over me.

 

“I wake up every single morning and and thank God I have you next to me, Katie. I go to sleep thinking the exact same thing,” his hands grip my hips as he moves slowly towards me, “I know I’m the luckiest man alive. You’re everything and more than I could have ever dreamed of, I didn’t even know these feelings existed until I met you.”

 


Daniel..

 

“And in six weeks time, I’ll be sliding another ring on your finger,” he takes my left hand and kisses my engagement ring, “I’ll be standing up in front of all our friends and family and telling them, I’m yours and you’re mine and we’ll be that way forever.”

 

As he says the word f
orever,
he slides himself into me, his jaw going tight, his eyes locking on mine. I can feel every delicious inch of him and I can’t help but groan in response, to not only having him inside me, but his words. Daniel has the habit of telling me the most beautiful and earth shattering things when we make love. It seems, when we are joined in this way, his feelings pour out of him and he cannot help but share how he feels, right at that moment, with me.

 

“That day, “ he tells me as he continues to move within me, “Will be one of the happiest and proudest days of my life and I will always, always treasure it.”

 

“I’ll be whole that day,” I whisper, “I’ll be yours forever, even though you have me, all of me now and always.” I whisper, linking the fingers on our left hands together.

 

“You’re the only person to have all of me, you will always be the only person who knows me, every single part of me, like no one else, Katie. Only you.”

 

I sit up, wrapping my arms around his neck as we move together. The feeling of being totally and completely together in the moment a little overwhelming. Tears spring to my eyes and I can’t stop them. Nothing is more beautiful than being with Daniel like this, making love with the man who is my other half, who has held me up when I’ve been unable to stand and face the world, who gives everything he is to me because he wants to, not because he has to.

 

“I love you, Daniel.” I tell him, gripping his face in my hands.

 

“And I love you, Katie. You. You are my life. You are my light.”

 

We find our release together, gripping each other so closely we are one person. In that moment I don’t think I have ever felt closer or more complete in my life. The love I feel for him consumes me completely. It heals me and it makes me whole. It put all my broken pieces back together until I was me again. It found pieces of me I didn’t know were missing until they slotted into place. It is a promise of protection and safety. It is what keeps my heart beating every minute of every day.

 

“And you are my warmth.” I whisper, as we hold each other catching our breath. After a few minutes, I feel his smile against my skin.

 

“We’re going to be really late.” he laughs against my neck.

 

“We are. You’re right,” I pull back and look him in the eyes. They are shining with love and devotion, “But what a reason to be late.”

 

 

* * *

 

 

We aren’t late, we’re a little early actually. When we enter the building there is a buzz of activity. Everyone is dressed in their best clothes and looking gorgeous. I make my way further into the room for tonight and smile, it looks beautiful, all golds and creams. I find the table we are sitting on and place my bag down. I need to go and check on a few things before everyone arrives. Daniel comes along with me, his hand in mine or resting on the small of my back. I’ve been so wrapped up in how nervous I am, I forgot maybe he’s nervous too.

 

“Are you okay?” I ask him as we walk into the reception area.

 

“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?”

 

“It’s not making you a little nervous that you’re going to be spending the evening surrounded by people you don’t know?”

 

“I’ll be spending the evening watching you shine, watching how incredible you are at your job, watching how many people love and admire you. I’m far from nervous, I’m looking forward to it.”

 

“God, you’re amazing.” I tell him, stopping us from walking and resting my hand on his hip.

 

“It’s you that’s amazing, Katie. Look around you, you made all this happen, while planning our wedding and helping three other couples plan theirs. You. You are amazing and I am so proud of you, I’m so proud to be the man you call yours.” I don’t know what to say, I just look at him and smile.

 

“Come on, people are arriving, it’s your time to shine and for me to puff out my chest like the proud fiancé I am.” he kisses my temple and leads us over to where people are arriving.

 

The next hour and a half are spent introducing people and chatting. I am in my element and with Daniel’s hand pressed to my lower back the whole time, I feel like there isn't anything I can’t achieve. When it’s time to sit down for dinner, I finally get a chance to talk to him and have a drink myself.

 

“Okay?”

 

“More than okay,” he reaches up to brush along my cheekbone with his hand, “You’re incredible. I already knew that of course, but to see you at work tonight, how everyone pays you one hundred percent of their attention when you talk, how their eyes shine with admiration for you, Katie… It has been an incredible experience for me.”

 

“Were you bored?” I ask, leaning in to his touch.

 

“Not in the slightest,” his eyes travel over my shoulder to where the dance floor is, “I really hope we get to share a dance together later?”

 

“Oh absolutely,” I smile, “I’ve been looking forward to that all week.”

 

“Maybe we can practise for our first dance?”

 

“Maybe we can.”

 

I get pulled into conversation around the table then, Daniel tells everyone about his photography work and everyone listens completely wrapped up with his stories of travelling all over the world to capture various different things. It’s my turn to listen with pride now, he is animated and confident, the love for his job evident, I reach over and take his hand in mine as he talks about being in Italy. He squeezes my hand and continues talking, never for a minute losing focus.

 

When the meal is cleared away and the band begins, Daniel pulls me out of my chair and into his arms. He swirls us around the dance floor as the band sing
Moondance
. The next song begins and Daniel pulls me a little closer to him, his jacket discarded, he is absolutely gorgeous in his waistcoat that just seems to showcase his tall, lean body. I look over his shoulder and notice Nicola from work watching him with a look of interest, she notices me looking and winks and sticks her thumbs up at me. Yes, I’m aware how gorgeous my soon to be husband is, and yes, I’m aware how very lucky I am too.

 

The evening is filled with lots of dancing and fun and by the time we make it home, I’m ready to crawl into bed I’m so exhausted. I remove all my make up, brush my teeth and collapse into bed. I’ve never been so pleased to climb into bed in my life. My feet are throbbing, I’ve been on my feet since seven this morning and it’s now well past midnight. I watch with sleepy eyes as Daniel undresses at the bottom of our bed, the only light coming from the lamp beside the bed. He is so utterly perfect and even more so because he can’t see how perfect he is. I groan with delight when I feel his warm body press to my back, I must have fallen asleep.

 

“Go back to sleep, beautiful.” he whispers, kissing the top of my head.

 

“Goodnight, Daniel.”

 

I’m asleep before I even hear his mumbled reply.

 

Chapter Twenty-Eight

 

 

From where I stand, I can see Daniel in the dining room, working away on his laptop, getting things ready for his week away to Italy. He looks relaxed and happy, dressed casually in jeans and a t-shirt, his bare feet resting on the chair opposite him. He taps away, running his hand occasionally over his chin and mouth which he does when he is concentrating on something, a habit I’ve picked up on recently, he also does it when he is nervous. I have music on and I’m enjoying getting dinner for the both of us. When a song begins to play, I smile and begin to sing. Turning to the sink with my back to Daniel, I begin preparing the vegetables. When two warm, strong arms wrap around me, I lean into the wall of muscle and allow him to move us gently to the music.

 

“I don’t think there are many things in life better than this.” his breath is hot against my neck, his stubbly cheek tickling.

 

“Than being in the kitchen while I cook for you?” I whisper, swallowing down the emotion I feel.

 

“Than having the woman you love, who completes you, in your arms.”

 

“So romantic.”

 

“It isn’t about being romantic, it’s about being honest. You,” he presses a kiss to my neck making me shudder, “Are everything to me. I’d do anything in my power to make you happy.”

 

“And if what would make me happy wasn’t in your power?”

 

“Then I would find out whose power in was in and I’d find a way to do it. Nothing will stop me making you happy, Katie.”

 

I turn in his arms, wrapping my arms around his neck, I look deep into his eyes.

 

“You make me happy. I don’t need anything else. Just you. Always just you.”

 

“But if the day comes when that isn’t enough, tell me. I’ll give you anything, I’ll do anything, as long as you stay by my side.” his eyes are so serious it makes my heart ache.

 

“Stop it, that day will never, ever come, Daniel,” I hold my left hand up, the hand that is home to the most beautiful engagement ring, “You see this? This is a promise of forever. For you. For me. For us.”

 

In three weeks, Daniel and I are getting married all the months of planning are all going to be worth it. I’m going to walk down the aisle to him and when we walk back down, we will be married. It seems to have taken a long time to get here, but the reality is it hasn’t. It has been a whirlwind of emotions and healing. Of love and friendship. Of discovering myself again after losing sight of who I am. It has been a journey I would take again if I knew it meant I’d be where I am right now. There aren’t reasons for everything in life, there isn’t always a simple answer. When you’re caught up in a storm and you can’t see how you’re going to get out of it, it’s hard to keep smiling. Then everything around you begins to calm and in the calm, you see your light. Daniel is my light.

 

“This song.” Daniel speaks into my hair.

 

“Yes?”

 

“It’s beautiful. It seems… It’s so fitting for what I feel for you.”

 

“Just hold me.” I whisper feeling utterly choked by emotions right now.

 

He does, he holds me, swaying us gently back and forth to the song and when it finishes, he doesn't let me go. He holds me while another couple of songs play. When he does finally let me go, there are tear stains on his grey t-shirt. He places his hands on either side of my face, tilting my head up so I’m looking into his eyes. When he has my full attention he speaks.

 

“You are my life. You’re where it begins again and where it will always continue. You are everything to me. Everything.”

 

“You’re everything to me too.” I whisper.

 

“So dry your eyes beautiful, everything is going to be just perfect, I promise.”

 

 

* * *

 

The simple things are the big things they say. Whoever
they
are, they are right. As I sit watching Daniel arrange little pieces of card with names on around circular pieces of card that are acting as our tables I fall in love with him all over again. He has this sexy manly beard thing going on right now, he tells me it's for Movember, but he stopped shaving in October when I happened to mention, after I found an old photo of him, how sexy I found him with a beard. I am almost certain he has no plans to shave it until our wedding in December when I know he will want to be clean shaven.

 

We must have spent hours going over this seating plan, trying to get the perfect mix of people on each table. Relatives of Daniel's and friends of mine. Couples and singletons. We want to mix it up and encourage everyone to chat, we want everyone to come together and spend the day making new friends and not sticking with ones they already know. We’ve had a sign made that tells everyone to pick a seat and not a side during our ceremony, our wedding is about us joining together and for that reason, everyone is welcome to sit wherever they want to.

 

“I think I've got it.” He looks up and smiles.

 

“Got what? Gorgeous eyes? The most incredible jaw?” I lean over and kiss under his jawline and inhale, Daniel always smells amazing there, “The most perfect body? The strongest legs?” I run my hand over his jean clad thigh and squeeze, “Everything I could ever want or dream of?”

 

He looks at me shyly, but with heat in his eyes. My hands on him and my words are clearly having an effect. He leans closer and kisses me softly, running his tongue under my top lip.

 

“I'm not sure I'm any of those things.”

 

“I am,” I kiss him back, “so what were you going to say?” He pulls back and takes my hand, resting them both in his lap, he points to table number five and holds up eight names.

 

“If we sit April and Stanley here, then that leaves table six free for the Sheridan's to sit at.”

 

“I think that should work.” I smile, pleased we have finally got it sorted.

 

“I hope everyone will chat and embrace each other. I cannot stand weddings where no one talks.”

 

“They will talk, I know they will.” I reassure him.

 

“So the only thing we have left to do is pick up my suit. You have your dress, do you have everything else?”

 

“Yes. Shoes, underwear, flowers, cake, all those things are sorted. Are you sure about the wedding favours?”  

 

“Yes. I think it is such a beautiful idea. If you like it, well go with that.”

 

Having decided on a
Cinderella
and poppy theme for the wedding as it’s important to both of us everything goes perfectly together. Poppy is the biggest part of Daniel's life and she is a big part of mine too. When I was online one day, I came across a unique wedding favour that I fell in love with straight away. I had shown Daniel who loved the idea too. So together we sat and made up lots of little brown packets with poppy seeds in. On the front there was a sticker that simply said
Let love bloom
along with our names and the date of our wedding. Every guest would get a packet to plant and in doing so our love would bloom but also Poppy's would too, a way of remembering Daniel's little angel.

 

“I do love that idea, and I love the fact our tables are parts from
Cinderella
.”

 

“It's
our thing
.” he smiles.

 

“And I love that we have a photo of us both holding the book together on each table.”

 

“Photography is
my thing
.”

 

“And I love that everyone gets a bauble made for them with parts of
Cinderella
in too.”

 


Cinderella
was Poppy's and your favourite book and if I’m honest, it’s mine too. I love that you incorporated so much of my daughter into our wedding.

 

“She lives in here,” I place my hand over his heart, “I live in here too. And you live here,” I place his hand over my heart, “I wish she could be here, I wish she could be my bridesmaid and walk down the aisle with me. I wish she could see her Daddy get married and be a real Prince Charming.”

 

“She will be, Katie. She is always with us.”

 

“When are you getting your suit?” I kiss him softly and smile.

 

“Tomorrow, and before you ask, no, you’re not coming with me.”

 

“Why not?” I pout, he is unbelievably gorgeous in a suit and I can’t wait to see what he decided on.

 

“Because,” he pulls me into his lap and rests his chin on my shoulder, “I don’t get to see you, so you don’t get to see me.”

 

“Where does it say that,
anywhere?

 

“It doesn’t but it’s my rule.” he moves his face to my neck and runs his jaw along it making me shiver.

 

“It’s a stupid rule,” I groan and move my head to the side to give him better access so he can keep doing it, “I want to see you.”

 

“And I’d love to see you in your dress, but it’s not going to happen.”

 

His hands skim over my waist and up to my breasts, his thumbs move back and forth over my nipples until they are stiff and begging for attention. I can feel him growing beneath my bottom and I shift myself a little to the left so he is nestled right where I need him. He looks up at me, his eyes heated and full of need. I lean down and press my lips to his, he opens his mouth willingly and grants my tongue entry to his warm mouth, I groan, as I always do when his tongue first brushes over mine.

 

“Lets go upstairs?” he pants into my mouth.

 

“No.” I shake my head.

 

“No?”

 

“No,” I kiss him again, “Lets go into the lounge, by the fire.”

 

“I like the sound of that even better.”

 

He lifts me effortlessly, like I weigh nothing and carries me into the lounge and sits me on the edge of the sofa and pulls the big, soft blanket down onto the floor and places it in front of the fire that’s crackling away. He picks up a few pillows and makes us a little nest before he reaches for his jumper and pulls it off and over his head, when his hands go to his jeans I can’t help but stare. He strips in front of me then walks over to me, dropping to his knees and removing my clothes too.

 

“Make love to me, Mr Lambert.” I grin, as he pulls me onto the blanket.

 

“I plan to.” he smiles, laying me down.

 

He takes his time, never rushing. He knows my body well, he knows just where and when to kiss and touch me, and knowing the when is so very important. We move together, both lost in each other until we both find our release. We stay joined together, my hands running up and down the length of his spine. He really does have a gorgeous back. When we both start to shiver, Daniel grabs another blanket and lays in over us and pulls me to his chest. Lulled by the fire and the heat of each other we fall asleep.

 

 

* * *

 

“So you have everything?” Daniel asks as I pack the last couple of bits in my overnight bag.

 

“Yes. If you just bring this bag,” I zip it up, “Then I’ll have everything else.”

 

“Okay, I can manage that.” he smiles from his position on the bed.

 

“And the rings, don’t forget the rings.” I grin.

 

“I will not forget the rings, I’ll not be letting them out of my sight till they are on our fingers.”

 

“What are you doing tonight?” I ask, sitting next to him.

 

“Not much. Ryan is going to help me take the last few bits over to the venue, then we are going to watch a film I guess. I’m cooking. A couple of beers, boring stuff.”

 

“Sounds okay to me.”

 

“What are you planning to do?”

 

“Nothing, we’re having our nails done in a couple of hours, then we’ll go home, relax and get to bed early so I don’t look hideous tomorrow!”

 

“Katie, you could never look hideous!” he shakes his head.

 

“Daniel, is it stupid I’m really dreading sleeping alone tonight?”

 

“No. I’m not looking forward to it either, but just think,” he leans over and pulls me to him, “The next time you go to sleep after tonight, you’ll be my wife and I’ll be your husband. That will keep you going.”

 

“That will make me over excited and I won’t be able to sleep!”

 

“It’s one night. It will be worth it, when I see you walking down the aisle to me… I’ll forget we spent the night apart and just remember that we won’t ever have to spend a night apart again.”

 

“Well, except when you have to go away for work.” I remind him.

 

“Don’t spoil the vision, Katie.” he chuckles.

 

“Sorry,” I laugh, “Can you believe this time tomorrow, we will almost be married?” I draw lazy circles over his tattoo and he sighs.

 

“Yes actually. I’ve waited long enough for this. It feels like I’ve waited my whole life to be married to you.”

 

“Well, you don’t have to wait much longer,” I lean up on my elbow and look at the clock, “I really need to get going. I have to pick Ginny up for our nail appointment.”

 

“Okay.”

 

“I’ve left your present in your drawer over there,” I nod to his bedside table, “Don’t open it till the morning.”

 

“And I’ve put yours by the front door.”

 

“I’ll miss your arms around me tonight, I’ll be cold.”

 

He pulls me so I’m under him and leans down so just our foreheads are touching, I can feel his breath washing over me. I close my eyes, just soaking him in.

 

“Let my love for you keep you warm. Rest safe in the knowledge tomorrow we’ll be forever joined together. I love you, Katie.”

 

“I love you too.”

 

I head downstairs and Daniel helps me into the car with everything I need. When I turn to say goodbye to him, he is holding out a copy of
Cinderella
to me. He places it in my hands then steps back a little so he can look at me.

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