Authors: Janet Dailey
It was difficult to leave the intoxicating circle of his arms when the song ended. Her awareness of him physically was increasing with each passing minute. Her voice automatically responded to his conversation, but her thoughts were strictly of him, wondering if he too felt the tremors that she did when he touched her or held her. Probably not, she decided wistfully.
This was only a holiday romance…an enjoyable way of passing the time. Tell found her physically attractive, but it ended there, the same as it did with her. Andrea didn't regret this. Under the circumstances, it was the best thing. At least Tell had enabled her to break free from the chains of the past. Maybe she would never love again as completely and innocently as she had loved Dale, but she was certain now that she didn't want to keep love out of the rest of her life. John would be so glad to hear that, she thought.
"Are you falling asleep on me?" Tell tipped his head back to gaze into her face.
"No, just thinking," Andrea murmured, smiling lazily into the chiseled, handsome lines of his face.
"It's late. You must be exhausted." The song ended and Tell pointed her toward the door. "I'd better take you back to the lodge."
They did not hurry their steps. Reluctantly, Andrea handed him the key to her room, unwilling to have the magic day end. As he had the night before, Tell opened the door and handed the key back to her. She couldn't bring herself to voice the word of good night. Gazing at him, Andrea wasn't aware of the slight pressure of his hands that drew her into his arms. It seemed that she went of her own volition.
Pliantly, she yielded to his probing kiss. There was hunger in her response, her fingers curled into the raven smoothness of the hair that grew low on his neck. Immediately, his mouth became hard and demanding against hers. Then she felt the undertow of desire sweeping away her control.
While she still had the will, Andrea turned her mouth away from his. The fires were not so easily banked as he buried his head in the soft curve of her neck. She moaned softly in reluctant protest to the havoc within.
"Tell, please," she whispered.
"Invite me in for coffee," he demanded hoarsely, nibbling sharply at the lobe of her ear.
"I don't think so," Andrea said, exhaling with shaky slowness.
Taking a deep breath, Tell slowly lifted
his head, cupping her face with his hands. The sensually masculine mouth curved into an excitingly handsome, rueful smile.
"Why am I letting you get away with saying 'no'?" he mused rhetorically.
"Maybe it's because you so seldom hear it," she smiled weakly, knowing with a flash of intuition that she was right.
"You're dangerous, Andrea." A mask stole over his face, making his expression unreadable.
"Me?" she laughed in disbelief. At this moment she felt completely under his domination.
"Yes. I can't make up my mind if you're slipping away from me or closing in for the kill," Tell murmured evenly, and Andrea winced at the underlying tone of harsh cynicism. "I'm sorry," he sighed, brushing a dark golden curl behind her ear. "I can't help being wary. I've been disillusioned too many times. What time are you leaving tomorrow?"
"For where?" Her hazel eyes widened in bewilderment.
"For wherever it is that you live in Oregon?" He mocked her confusion with a twisting smile.
"I'm not leaving tomorrow; not until Friday morning," she told him, remembering how she had let him believe that first night that she would only be at Squaw Valley for the weekend.
"Why didn't you tell me?" His gaze became forbiddingly dark and narrow.
"At the time," Andrea wavered, intimidated by that glimpse of anger and her own instinct that said he could be brutally ruthless. "At the time, it didn't seem important. I didn't even really know you."
"No," Tell agreed. A teasing glitter sparkled through his eyes with a mercurial change of mood. "I was just some arrogant stranger making a pass at you, wasn't I? You can be cool, Andrea." He tantalizingly brushed his hard male mouth against her lips. "And very warm, too. Have breakfast with me tomorrow? I'll phone you around seven."
"Yes." It hadn't been a request, more like an order, but Andrea accepted it anyway. He wished her good night, placed a firm kiss on her mouth and turned away. "Tell?" she called to him hesitantly. He stopped a few steps away but didn't walk back. "When are you leaving?"
"I don't have to be back until Wednesday," he told her. "That doesn't give us very much time, does it?"
There was a thoughtfully serious arching of a dark brow, then he turned and walked away. This time she didn't call him back.
Wednesday morning he would go out of her life. She had known he would some time, Andrea reminded herself, so it was insane to feel depressed at knowing exactly when that would be. It was only a holiday thing. The more she repeated that, the larger her doubts loomed.
The vague depression vanished with the sound of Tell's voice on the phone the next morning. There was no time to feel blue. Blue was the color of the Sierra sky. There was too much perfection in the day for Andrea to worry about the "maybe" of tomorrow.
The sun was a gigantic gold nugget suspended above the Mother Lode country, the granite majesty of the Sierra Nevada range. The sky was a brilliant, cloudless blue, casting pastel shadows on the pure white snow of the mountains and valleys. Near the summit of Squaw Peak, the sapphire blue of
Lake Tahoe, the Lake in the sky, could be seen ringed by a circlet of white mountains. To the north was Donner pass and the place of encampment for the Donner party. The day was too beautiful to dwell on that pioneer tragedy.
Not even the other skiers on the slopes could disturb the enchanted circle that had drawn Andrea and Tell together. They jointly stretched out each moment, taking their time going down the slopes and eating a late lunch at the restaurant at the top of the
gondola lift. In the later afternoon, they sat in front of a fireplace and laughed as Tell tried to teach Andrea to play backgammon, ultimately with some success.
But again the precious seconds of the day slipped by. They were in the hallway outside her room, a midnight sky sparkling with stars beyond the roof of the lodge. There was no mention of coffee or when the other would be leaving. Yet for Andrea, it was there, adding an urgency to the embrace they shared.
When he had left, it was the mirror in her room that brought Andrea crashing back to reality. The soft radiance in her reflection caught at her breath. Her lips were slightly swollen by the frustrated passion of Tell's kisses, bruising in their mastery. A haunted look replaced the jade sparkle in her hazel eyes.
"So you thought you could handle a holiday flirtation?" the mirror mocked. "So you thought you could play with matches and escape the flame? You were so confident that it would be fun and excitement and end with no regrets."
"That's the way it will be," Andrea whispered, choked by the lump in her throat.
"Then why are you falling in love with him?" her reflection jeered. "And why haven't you told him the truth about yourself? What's his opinion of you going to be when he finds out? You're a fool, Andrea Grant!"
Closing her eyes tightly in pain, she turned away from the mirror, knowing that when she opened them nothing would have changed. The truth would be still staring her in the face. What goes up, must come down, she laughed bitterly. And she had been riding high, foolishly thinking that she still had her feet on the ground.
Tell the truth. Wait. Tell the truth. Wait. The two thoughts hammered in her mind, the pounding dilemma making her sleep fitful and plagued with nightmares. She was no nearer to a decision with the rising of the sun.
Once in Tell's presence, the little courage she had mustered vanished over the breakfast table. She couldn't tell him. Andrea wanted another day of happiness in her grasp. It didn't do any good to tell herself that she was not only a fool but selfish as well. So she waited.
"I've made reservations for one of the dinner shows at the casino tonight," Tell told her as they checked in their skis after an afternoon run. "I hope you brought along something halfway formal to wear. If not, we'll run into town and buy something."
"No, I…I have a dress," Andrea assured him quickly. The prospect of Tell helping to pick out a gown was more painful than pleasing. "What time?"
"Six?" He glanced inquiringly at her, a caressive light in his dark eyes as he reached around her to open the lodge door. "Can you be ready by then?"
"Easily," she said smiling, as she walked with him to the desk to pick up her key.
"You have a message, too, miss," the clerk said, handing her a slip of paper with the key. "He called about a haft an hour ago."
Without looking at it, Andrea shoved the message in the pocket of her jacket. Out of the corner of her eyes, she saw the glistening of the overhead light on the raven sheen of Tell's black hair as he tilted his head inquiringly toward her.
"Aren't you even going to see who it's from?" he asked curiously, a watchful glitter in his look.
Self-consciously, she took it from her pocket and glanced at it. She had already guessed it was from John. She had thoughtlessly not called him as she had promised.
"It's…it's just from John." She shrugged nervously, trying to indicate that it wasn't important.
"And who is John? A boyfriend you have tucked away in Oregon? Is that it?" Tell inquired with false lightness.
"He isn't a boyfriend." Andrea breathed in deeply. The message clutched in her hand could be the means to begin telling him the truth.
A slow smile began to curve his mouth. "He's the writer you've been working for, isn't he?" At her faint nod, he reached out and took the paper from her fingers. "A message from an employer invariably is a call back to work."
"Tell!" she gasped, recovering from her stunned surprise and reaching out to take back the message. But he easily eluded her attempt.
"If you didn't receive the message, then you can't know he called. And you won't have received any summons to go back to work." Deliberately, he tore the paper into tiny bits and tossed it into a nearby wastebasket.
"You shouldn't have done that," Andrea breathed, her gaze swinging from the metal basket to meet his glittering gaze. "But I'm glad you did."
"If you're going to be ready by six," he glanced at his gold wristwatch, "you'd better
get started."
"I'll be ready and waiting," she promised.
Three times in her room, she picked up the telephone to call John, but each time she replaced the receiver. Andrea couldn't understand her own hesitancy. There was a vague premonition that the next time she heard John's voice, the walls would come crashing down around her. It was a crazy sensation, but she couldn't overcome it. And the knowledge that Tell would be arriving at six easily allowed her to put off phoning until the next day.
THE ROAD FOLLOWED the twisting, turning shoreline of Lake Tahoe, its jewel colors hidden by a coat of black satin that matched the night sky. Tall pines stretched upward on the forested slopes of the mountains, their green limbs cloaked in white snow. A smattering of stars winked in the sky waiting for the moon to make its entrance.
The show they were attending was at one of the casinos on the south shore of Lake Tahoe, naturally on the Nevada side. Their circuitous route on the snow-packed, curving road took more time than the miles indicated, but Andrea didn't mind. It was the first time she and Tell had been truly alone and she enjoyed the quiet intimacy which they shared as they rode along in the car.
By silent mutual consent, they talked of abstract things: of weather, politics, and sport. Sometimes, they said nothing at all. It was a disappointment to Andrea when the lights of the casinos blinked their neon colors in front of them. She hadn't wanted the drive to end yet.
Inside the plushly decorated gambling casino, the din of the slot machines was never ending, increased by the voice of the players at the tables. It seemed crowded to her, but Tell said it wasn't. The seating had begun for the dinner show, so he promised to take her around the casino afterwards since this was her first visit. She enjoyed the name entertainment, but she was more conscious of the arm lying naturally around her shoulders than the songs being sung on the stage.
Afterward, as Tell had promised, he took her around the various gaming tables. Under his tutelage, she placed a bet at the wheel of fortune and won, with the same result at the roulette wheel. At the dice tables, the action was too swift for her to follow, so it was Tell who placed the bet and won. His luck remained the same at the twenty-one tables. This time he let his winnings ride and the stack of chips kept increasing. Finally, when he reached the table limit, he cashed in his chips with a frown.
"What's wrong?" Andrea questioned, studying the uncompromising hardness of his expression.
Dark eyes bored into her for a moment before the lines softened into a mocking look. "I just discovered I was superstitious," Tell replied, circling her waist with his arm and turning her away from the tables.
"Superstitious about what?" She laughed softly.
"Lucky at cards, unlucky in love." The fire that blazed over her face made her heart leap in answer. "We haven't lost a bet tonight. I would rather have lost it all," Tell murmured thoughtfully. His words brought the haunted look back to her wide hazel eyes. "I didn't mean to frighten you. There's nothing to that old saying anyway," he scolded in an amused voice. "Now, where would you like to go next? Do you want to try the slot machines?"