Too Busy for Your Own Good (7 page)

Doing one thing at a time is a better use of your brain. Researchers at the Federal Aviation Administration and the University of Michigan found that working on numerous tasks at a time can take two to four times longer than if started one after the other. Brain scans of subjects multitasking show the brain constantly switching back and forth, using its neurons less efficiently. If you want to be more efficient, finish a task before moving on to the next, and you'll not only get it done faster and better, you'll get more benefit from the time you give your brain some downtime.

My very efficient and highly productive friend Nancy attributes her output to breaking any task or project into “chunks.” She focuses on one “chunk” at a time, gets it done, and then moves to the next. It just looks like she's multitasking, when actually it's sequential tasking.

Ha, ha, ha! Every new gadget or system touts how it's going to make your life easier and simpler. Technologies bring the world to us, and sadly, they also bring us to the world. Our senses are assaulted with more connections and information than the human soul can take in. In our efforts to filter out what we think isn't important or relevant to us, we are dulling ourselves. Our attention spans are shortening, and we block the very thing that can simplify our lives—peace and spiritual connection. The on/off switch is the best part
of a new gadget because it gives you ultimate power. Just because technology allows you to be on-call all the time, that doesn't mean you have to be.

Wrong! Recent scientific research has proven that happiness is not a goal but a process. Happiness brings success, not the other way around. Martin Seligman in
Authentic Happiness
says that happiness is pursuing a state of flow by engaging in activities that use your strengths and talents to serve others or participating in a cause that's bigger than yourself. You may complain—or boast—ceaselessly about being too busy, but in reality, this state of busyness just might be self-imposed. Your busyness must have a purpose in order for it to actually make you happy. Checking items off your checklist doesn't bring happiness in and of itself. That's just being busy for the sake of being busy.

False! When you voluntarily and routinely expand your hours on the job, you are asking for more busyness. When your boss then knows that she can expect more hours from you, she piles on more responsibilities, thus creating a vicious cycle of more “busy.” You'll garner more respect and forward movement in your career by the quality of your work than from the quantity of hours at your desk.

More often than not, fatigue, hunger, and low energy reduce your ability to think clearly and decrease your hand-eye coordination. You might end up less productive and more mistake-prone, leading to rework. All your busyness and lack of sleep may actually impact your reputation negatively. Your overachiever output might backfire when you're viewed
as a kiss-ass by supervisors and colleagues. You also might be alienating yourself from your coworkers by setting the bar unreasonably high and making their output look poor.

Mistake! Spending extra hours at your job and bringing work home at night and on the weekends to support your family comes, ironically, at the expense of an optimum relationship with your family. No matter how many times you tell them you're doing it all for them, the message you're sending is different from your intention.

When you're tired, hassled, and overworked, you may miss milestones in the lives of your mate and children. Think twice before you say you're doing it for them. Trading family time for work time may irreparably harm your relationships with your family. They may think that you love your work more than them since you devote so much time to it. You're conveying that your job is more important to you than they are. To make matters worse, you might be setting them up to dread their own future! If they think that “work” is a four-letter word, they might decide to stay a kid forever and avoid it if they can.

Sometimes your loved ones blame themselves for your overworking—that if somehow they were better or smarter, you wouldn't have to work so hard. This kind of guilt repels people from the contributory factor—you. This self-blame may trigger strong emotions that are very painful. Often, they may find it easier to deal with these emotions by tuning you out or “running away” from you.

Not right! News of the economy tanking is enough to shake anyone. Practically everyone is in a panic about money
these days, talking about how bad the economy is and what might happen if things don't turn around. This kind of panic is contagious, so you step up your pace and take on extra tasks. You buy into the mind-set that you've got to do more to make money. Instead, consider doing the following:

Concentrate on the job you have and do it very well so you're a valued member of the team (and less apt to be downsized or off-shored).

Review your personal budget (or make one for the first time) and be realistic about how much you've got coming in and going out.

Focus on where you can trim back, clean up your credit, and save.

Plan how to get a better job by continuing your education.

A survey of millionaires shows that they don't use time as a measurement of success. They measure their success based on their output quality, the results. Sometimes less really is more.

Not true! Skipping seeing your friends or begging off non-work activities because you're too busy (or tired) is a big mistake. Longtime pals and friendly coworkers are the key to your support system in tough times. Like a garden that once flourished, your friendships need to be tended, or they go fallow when you most need them. You may not know your coworker's been distracted or unreasonable because of family problems if you didn't attend the optional department sack lunch meeting.

When your friend says, “I didn't want to bother you, you're always so busy,” it is not a compliment! Especially when you find out something you might have missed while you were too busy working. It doesn't take too long for your friends to grasp the futility of inviting you out: “She's always busy.” “He'd never go last minute.”

You might think you're being more efficient by cutting out fun and socializing, but you may be avoiding—or pushing away—relationships that could help you do things easier or better. Slow down and have a good giggle—or cry—with a friend. If you can't visit, at least stay in touch with a heartfelt note or card saying how much you value their friendship.

Do not pass go! This is not an Olympic event you need to train for, and there is no great award or endorsement deal if you win the “I'm busier than you” race. Just because the world is busy moving at warp speed around you doesn't mean it's good or right for you. It's difficult to
not
feel the need to get competitive with being busy. It takes attention and effort to
not
succumb to the busyness plague and spread it around.

It only takes one person to be the calm in the center of the rush, the voice of reason that says “no” to more busyness, or the smile that lifts someone else's heart. It's far nobler to stand out for your sensibility than for your speed. You're bright—why couldn't you be the first in your group with a new, less-busy, and more relaxed lifestyle? You'll actually be living a green lifestyle—natural, sustainable, and reducing the negative impact on health.

Incorrect! Parents say that if they don't keep their kids busy, they will get bored and sit around eating junk and playing
video games. You think that you are staying away from boredom by being chronically busy. Busy and bored can be different descriptions of the same problem—feeling like you aren't completely engaged with high-quality experiences. These are mental processes that loop each other like a Venn diagram.

Filling every minute with activity and planning every day to accomplish the most doesn't leave much room for wonder, serendipity, chance, and just plain magic. You need to create space, or gaps, in your activity continuum. Space spares processing resources in your brain to be open to a brilliant solution. Space invites serendipity and unexpected blessings by allowing you to be more aware of your surroundings.

I believe that you have just done a very courageous act—you've taken responsibility for your busyness by closely examining your reasons for being so busy. Bravo! You may have also discovered that some of your reasons are actually excuses, and that some of your excuses are actually myths. Your next heroic and spirited act is to declare that you don't want or need the stress that your busyness is causing you. Read the next chapter to find out which of your physical symptoms and emotional warning signs are pointing to dangerous stress levels and learn a quick, easy, five-minute first aid for beating stress. This is your life, and you're making it better.

Nothing can bring you peace but yourself
.

—Ralph Waldo Emerson

Being busy may be a necessary part of your job and your life, but being too busy has more than just social consequences. As you'll discover in this chapter, it's not the busyness itself that ends up getting the best of you, it's the stress that comes with the territory that proves to be most problematic. If you keep up the hectic, action-packed pace that probably led you to pick up this book, inevitably you will begin feeling the physical and mental signs of stress. That's right, my friends: being too busy is bad for your health. When you start to feel trapped by your lifestyle, you're in the “busyness danger zone.”