Torn (18 page)

She looked up at me
with real curiosity in her eyes, and I felt something inside me wrung
dry to provide the moisture needed for future tears.

"You aren't
talking about me, you're talking about Brandon."

I nodded slowly, and
she tilted her head to the side deliberately as a gust of wind
whipped her beautiful blond hair around.

"What if that
isn't the case? What if he's where he is because he's driven by duty
to them. Duty to his family, duty to the town?
Your
friends
aren't the best character references, buddy. Jasmin is a complete
sociopath and Rachel is scared to death of losing your good will."

"Jasmin isn't
petty. I don't always understand why she chooses the path she takes,
but there is always a good reason behind it. One doesn't go through
the things she's gone through without developing an incredible
capacity for empathy. I'd back her morals over almost anyone else I
know."

It wasn't what I'd
planned on saying, but as I said it I realized it was true, and the
knowledge freed me to go on.

"As for Rachel I
can only say she's better than me in almost every way. I continue to
fail to live up to my heritage, but she's stood by me despite that.
I believe that means she sees a seed of something good inside me.
Someday I think I may manage to live up to that potential. For now,
whatever good I do have inside me worries about what Brandon will
eventually do to you."

Adri's pulse was
smooth and unhurried as she reached out and placed one hand on the
side of my face. The contact sent little thrills of rightness
through my being, but even that wasn't a match for what I felt at her
words.

"You really
believe that. You may not be right, but you're not lying."

"No, I'm not
lying. That is the truth as far as I know it."

"I can tell.
Your heart remained steady through it all."

Rachel found me
covered in paint, slumped against the wall in the gallery that
separated my studio from my bedroom. I'd finally given up ever
finishing up Adri's sleeping portrait. My mind's eye had utterly
failed me when it came to reproducing an actual likeness.

"I think maybe
it's time to give this one up big brother. I haven't ever seen you
so frustrated and consumed by a project."

I reached out and
brushed a stray hair back behind her ear and then shrugged. "I
think you're right. It had the most potential of anything I've ever
painted, but I just can't seem to get it right."

"So do I ever
get to see this near masterpiece?"

My mind instantly
shied away from the idea. Apparently my unease was obvious; Rachel
held her hands up in surrender. "It's ok, there's no need to
feel guilty. If it never ends up in the gallery, it never ends up in
the gallery."

The week had been
incredibly busy. I'd eventually had to go back to school. The
tactical purpose of my absence had been accomplished on Monday night,
and after that I couldn't continue to justify remaining home. I'd
used my time at home however to get far enough ahead in my studies
that I could spend more time with the rest of the pack.

I'd spared with James
and Isaac, spent additional hours in the machine, and slept more than
at any other time since I'd first manifested a second shape.
Everyone assumed it was a result of the tremendous abuse I was
putting my body through in my strength training regime, but while I
was extra tired each night, the real reason had been the hope each
night that I'd share my dreams with Adri.

Only there, safe from
the dominance games and worries about how Brandon would use her
against me was I able to open up and talk to her.

In real life she'd
remained just as cool and distant as always, and after one or two
abortive attempts to talk to her I just hunkered down and did my best
to ignore the yearning tearing at me.

Inside the dream world
things were different. I quickly learned just how dry her sense of
humor was, that she talked with her hands when she got really
excited, and that I had to be very careful of mentioning her father,
her sister, and car accidents in general.

It had been a
wonderful, hellish existence, but I'd been neglecting Rachel. I
looked back up at my younger sister and caught her eying my clothes.

"I think I'm
going to have to start buying you stuff a half size up from what I
normally get you. That weight-lifting program seems to be working."

My laugh was nothing
more than a courtesy to show appreciation for her humoring my latest
wild attempt to save us all from Brandon. It was impossible for me
to have put on the kind of mass she was indicating in such a short
time.

"Rach, did you
and Adri have a fight on Monday?"

She hung her head like
she expected to be kicked and I was momentarily reminded of dream
Adri's assertion that I bullied Rachel.

"Yes. She
wasn't happy about my not going to Les Mis. I can't really blame
her, but I haven't managed to find a way to make it up to her."

"Why didn't you
tell me?"

"You've been
really busy this week. Besides there wasn't anything you could have
done about it and I didn't want you to feel guilty for it."

"Maybe I should
feel guilty. She's just a normal human. You could have gone and
been ok, but I was too busy jumping at shadows."

Rachel shook her head
and hugged me. "No, you were being my protective big brother,
the one who lives in a dangerous world so that he can keep me safe.
I understood even before you told me I couldn't go that it was likely
my friendship with Adri was going to be the price I had to pay to
convince you she wasn't a threat."

Her tone had taken on
textures I couldn't really place. I opened my mouth to tell her she
wasn't making sense but she talked over top of me.

"She's my
friend, and when you are someone's friend you do what's best for them
even if you have to make sacrifices to see that happen. Our
friendship was a small thing to sacrifice in order to convince you
she wasn't a shape shifter. She's going to need your protection very
soon, and you'd never have given it if you still thought she was like
you rather than like me."

It was the oddest
thing I'd ever seen out of Rachel. She turned, looking a little lost
and left the gallery before I could ask her what she meant, and once
she was gone I couldn't bring myself to chase her down.

Jasmin knocked on my
door as I was stripping down to my ha'bit. "You're leaving
then?"

I hadn't consciously
made the decision, but as she asked the question I realized she was
right.

"I have to
Jasmin. I'm sorry, I can't really explain it, but I need you to
trust me. I've realized you must have a good reason for the crazy
things you've been doing lately, and I need you to trust that I've
got a good reason for this."

For a moment I thought
she was going to argue with me, but then she sighed and nodded. "If
you've got to do something stupid I guess tonight's as good of night
to do it as any. Brandon's people will all be at the kegger.
Vincent's too much of a party animal to miss a bash as big as this
one is supposed to be."

I nodded my thanks and
hurried out to the garage. The Hummer didn't boast all of the
comforts of its shinier sibling, but it was the same vehicle the
military opted for when the mission called for the ability to go
almost anywhere.

It was already dark,
so I didn't need to worry about anyone seeing me running around in my
wolf form, but something compelled me to take a vehicle at least part
of the way. I visualized the rough map that had been passed around
the school earlier in the day, and then checked it against the
prevailing wind. I was going to have to detour quite a ways off of
the shortest path, but I couldn't risk anyone catching my scent and
deciding tonight would be a good opportunity to take down the rival
alpha.

I pulled off of the
road and dropped into a ravine that was sometimes used by jeepers
when they were looking for a new challenge. My progress slowed as
the terrain became increasingly rugged. I knew that I could make
better time if I dismounted and took to four legs, but stubbornly
kept to the Hummer. When I got to within three miles of the party
site I finally parked the Hummer and slipped out into the night.

It had cooled down
somewhat over the last few weeks. It wasn't what anyone from Idaho
would call cold, but some of the oppressive heat had left, and I
found myself invigorated by the clean, crisp smell of the breeze.

I bounded over fallen
trees, splashed through the tiny trickles of water that passed for
springs, and otherwise enjoyed the trip until I got close enough to
hear the thrumming beat of the music and smell the crowded bodies and
spilled alcohol of the truly drunk.

Brandon's pack was
ever present on the wind as I slowly advanced forward. Brandon's
heavy musk especially burned my throat and made me want to be
elsewhere, but I sought it out regardless because floating along like
an aromatic accompaniment was Adri's enchanting scent.

I spent nearly an hour
hunkered down in the middle of a group of night-blooming cacti that
was especially pungent and which would go a long ways towards hiding
my scent if someone did happen to circle around and get downwind of
me.

I'd almost decided I
was the worst kind of crazy. I couldn't hear any conversation over
the music and there wasn't anything to be learned by scent. I stood
to leave when the music suddenly skidded to a stop.

"You should
forget your stupid lies. If you repeat them you'll be sorry. Every
single person here will vouch for Brandon."

Cassie's shrill voice
was impossible to miss in the sudden silence. It rang through me
with the subtlety of an amputation and I somehow knew who she was
talking to.

"Get out of
here. Don't wait around, don't ask anyone for a ride. You had your
chance with Brandon and you blew it. He's mine again, and if you're
not out of sight in the next five minutes I'll kill you myself and
end this stupid experiment once and for all."

The last was spoken
more quietly. With the wind pulling it away from the rest of the
party, it was possible nobody heard her death threat, but I felt a
surge of anger crash through me as I realized I didn't believe that.
The kids that hung out with Brandon were completely cowed by the
dominants.

Adri was moving now,
her steps clearly audible over the continuing lack of music. I heard
her fall and nearly left my hiding spot. It was incredibly unfair
for her to go through this at all, let alone by herself, but she
wouldn't welcome my presence in my current form. It was safer for
both of us if Brandon's people didn't scent me.

She was moving at
right angles to the wind, so the possibility was slim, but it still
existed. My resolve was tested as the music resumed, drowning out
the sound of her flight, and then I got the first smell of blood on
the air.

My beast roared to
life as part of me classified her as prey and therefore good only for
running down and consuming, but I'd had years of practice sublimating
those urges. I shoved my baser instincts down and walled them away
behind control very nearly the equal of Isaac's.

I was attempting to
follow Adri's progress on the wind when a low howl most people would
have mistaken for a wolf floated to me. I lurched to my feet and
took off at a sprint before I'd fully even classified it as belonging
to Nathanial.

They were hunting,
either out of pure sadism or because they lacked the inclination to
dominate the wolf''s desire to capture fleeing prey. The second howl
didn't really surprise me although it dramatically worsened my odds.
Simon was Nathanial's usual partner in depravity.

A fight between a
hybrid and a wolf was usually a forgone conclusion, but a fight
between a hybrid and two wolves was more like a matchup between
sledgehammer-equipped glass rods. They would both look for the
golden window of opportunity in which they could obtain a killing
grip and I'd attempt to kill one of them fast enough that there was
no chance for his fellow to kill me in turn.

I should have been
scared. I was scared for Adri, worried I wouldn't be in time, but
not afraid for myself. Nathanial and Simon had helped Vincent kill
two hikers earlier in the year. There were other incidents in St.
George and Vegas that I suspected were related to Brandon's pack, but
that one I'd been able to positively tie back to those three.

The trip to the
coroner's office hadn't left me, even all these months later. It was
finally time to rectify the wrong I'd let slide out of my fear of the
Coun'hij.

I was close enough now
to hear Adri running along ahead of me. She slipped again as the
wolves closed to within a few dozen feet. I heard her crash down the
slope and then her journey was arrested by a meaty thump as something
semi-yielding connected with a rock.

A yelp of pain
followed a second later as she tried to stand, and then I was
shifting forms as Nathanial sprung towards her. He never even saw me
coming, but Simon had already adjusted to my presence and darted in
to try and hamstring me.

I threw Nathanial into
the canyon wall and then swiped at Simon, just missing as he dodged
behind a large rock that drew a shower of sparks off of my claws. A
growl escaped me as I tried to spin back around and intercept
Nathanial.

I was a fraction of a
second too late. Powerful fangs latched onto my shoulder only just
before a second impact nearly knocked me to the ground. Nathanial's
refusal to release my shoulder and go for a new grip was his undoing.
I reached up with my left hand and sunk my claws into the softer
flesh of his stomach at the same time that my own fangs latched onto
his neck.