touch (39 page)

Belinda’s deal wasn’t the only threat to my existence.

*    *    *    *

Beatriz made school slightly uncomfortable for me.  Boys
kept stopping over during lunch and asking me on dates.  She sat across from me
with a beaming smile and a counter to every excuse I could offer.

During a pause between boys, I growled at Beatriz.  “What
are you offering them?  Money?”

She waved away my scowl with a laugh.  “No way.  I said
you’re easy.”

“Beatriz!” I hissed.

“Oh, calm down.  I needed to give them a fast motivation.” 
She dragged a fry through a mound of ketchup and plopped it in her mouth. 
“You’re the only one that’s accepted your fate.  I haven’t.  I’ll risk our
friendship until the end just for a chance to have you around long enough to
apologize.”

I rubbed my head at her brusque attitude unwilling to yell
at her.  At least, my mom left me alone at night.  “Let’s make a deal,” I
offered not wanting this to continue.  She harrumphed.

“You talk Tommy into coming home this Saturday to be
your
date, and I’ll agree to come with.  A double date.”

Her mouth dropped down.  “Tommy?”

I hid my smirk behind a hand.  “Yep and you can pick my
date,” I swore.  She’d be too busy worrying about Tommy to think about me if we
actually did go.

“Deal,” she said the word with the tone of a dare.

*    *    *    *

Beatriz stayed close-mouthed about the identity of my date
and our destination.  On the off chance she forgot about it, I didn’t bring it
up either.  I should have known better.

Friday after school, Brad and Tommy waited for us parked
outside the school.  A light rain obliterated all traces of winter’s snow.  The
visual reminder of the passing time stung my eyes.  The image of Morik waiting
outside leaning against his motorcycle haunted me for a moment and I wrapped my
arms around myself as I followed Beatriz to the car.

Brad held open the front door for me, his presence not
unexpected.  I didn’t imagine he liked the idea of his sister going anywhere
with Tommy without him.  Tommy, looking very uncomfortable, held the back door
for Beatriz.

“So, what are we doing, Bea?” Brad asked once we all sat in
the car.

She grinned at him.  “Roller skating.”

Both of the guys groaned.  I couldn’t ever remember roller
skating and didn’t think the date would end well for me.

Ten minutes later, Brad parked outside a nearly deserted
roller rink.  I wanted to ask Beatriz who we were meeting, but Brad hung back
holding the door open for us.  No windows lit the inside.  Multi colored lights
flashed in time with the music.

Beatriz led the way to a long counter that guarded several
racks of skates.  The man leaning against the counter asked what kind of skates
we wanted.

Beatriz asked for her size in a speed skate.  I looked at
the rink.  A worker sped around the loop.  I definitely didn’t plan on any
speed this time around and asked for a regular skate.  She laughed, but Brad
elbowed her.  Tommy grabbed his skates and went off to sit beside Beatriz to
lace up.

“Have you done this before?” Brad asked leading me to a
separate area away from Beatriz and Tommy.

I shook my head and stuffed my foot into a skate.  Another
new experience.  The prospect didn’t thrill me as much as it probably should
have.

“Don’t worry,” he assured me.  “Beatriz used to beg me to
bring her here all the time.  With enough time and practice, you’ll catch on.”

I nodded and tried standing.  Brad, already laced, stood
with me to offer his arm.  I pin-wheeled my arms numerous times as we made our
way to the glossy polished wood floor.  Beatriz hovered in front of Tommy
encouraging his movements while effortlessly gliding backward.

Brad wrapped his hand around mine, gripping it firmly to
support me.  Beatriz’s diabolical plan flashed clearly.

“So what did Beatriz say to get you here?” I asked as we
inched our way along.

Brad grinned.  “That you wanted a double date with me and
Tommy.  I wasn’t too thrilled about the idea of Beatriz and Tommy, but if
they’re in eyesight, it’s not so bad.”  He gave my hand a gentle squeeze.

I couldn’t speak.  Beatriz would sacrifice her brother like
that?  My eyes darted to her smiling face.  She caught my look and gave me a
sad smile.

“I’m dying.” I said flatly.  Brad laughed thinking I
referred to my pathetic attempts at skating.  “Beatriz isn’t accepting it.  I
wanted this date because I hoped Tommy would distract her from it.  In a good
way.”

He spun in front of me stopping us both, his expression
serious.

“She’s the first real friend I’ve ever had and I don’t want
her to dwell on this.  I didn’t think she’d pull you into it.”

“She pulls me into everything,” he said with quiet affection. 
“What do you have?”

Bad luck.  “It doesn’t matter.  What does matter is the time
left.  She’s going to need you and,” I looked toward Tommy who now held her
hand, “Tommy too I think.”

“When?”

“About two weeks.”

His eyes widened briefly then he turned and tugged me around
the rink.  We made one loop then sat together to watch Beatriz and Tommy skate
by several times.  Brad kept his hand wrapped around mine and I didn’t mind.  I
felt less lonely that way.

They brought me back before dark.  Beatriz grinned as she
walked me to the door.  Tommy and Brad stayed in the car.

“I saw,” she said knowingly.

I shook my head, a real smile stretching my face and walked
inside.  Her laughter echoed through the door as I leaned my head against it.

She saw me holding Brad’s hand and took it as hope.  A tear
leaked out.  I could never do that to her or Brad.

“Everything okay,” my mom asked behind me.  I heard hope in
her voice too.

“Yes,” I said keeping the devastation from my voice.  “Can
we start the chant early?”  I wanted the peace of oblivion.

*    *    *    *

I rushed out the door with Aunt Grace’s keys in my pocket
and two boxes in my arms.  Gran hadn’t baked for Mona while I wasn’t working
saying she hadn’t had the heart for it.  Now that I made an effort to go to
work, Gran made the effort to send me with something.

Across the street, the sight of Brian brought me up short. 
This time he didn’t walk away.  He stood there shaking and watching me.  Anger
pierced me.

“Didn’t you do enough?” I screamed at him.  He visibly
jumped and turned away quickly putting distance between us.

I could understand his trauma after being used by Ahgred.  I
didn’t understand why he came after Morik though.  Morik had never touched
him.  Why not go after Ahgred?  Perhaps facing him in the dark proved too
risky.  Hadn’t I shied away from the same thing?  Whatever his reason, his
continued strange behavior worried me.  I didn’t like that he watched the
house.  Could he be waiting for my family?

Dropping the boxes into the backseat of the car, I dashed
back into the house to tell everyone about the encounter and warn them.

“Ahgred mentioned that,” Aunt Danielle said surprising us
all.

“What do you mean?” I demanded.

“Brian’s been trying to watch you.  Each time he gets too
close, Ahgred turns him around.”

“No, I mean why are you talking to Ahgred?”

“It keeps him quiet so the rest of you can sleep.  He can’t
hurt me anymore,” she said softly.

I wasn’t the only one staring at her as if she’d gone
crazy.  “Just be careful,” I warned everyone again and left.

*    *    *    *

A few minutes before close, Brad came in.

Since Mona was already in back starting clean up, I moved
behind the counter to take his order.  Instead of ordering, he asked if I
wanted to walk the few blocks to the theatre and catch a movie.

“Beatriz?” I asked suspiciously.

“No.  She’s at home with Tommy, chaperoned by our parents. 
I thought you might want to get out and enjoy something a little less intense
than roller skating.”

I really didn’t want to, but something in his expression
told me he had just as much determination as Beatriz.  So I nodded and told him
it would take me a few minutes to clean up.

As soon as Mona saw him waiting, she gave me Gran’s money
and my share of the tips and sent us on our way.  We chose a comedy and spent
the next two hours sitting side by side in the chilly theatre.

Smiling with the closing credits, I turned to Brad to see
his reaction to the movie.  His eyes already watched me.  No smile lit his
face.  Before I could ask why, he leaned in and kissed me.  The kiss differed
from the one he’d given me on the porch.  One, it lasted longer.  Two, it
lacked any playful flavor.  It tasted of good-bye and regret.

He pulled back slowly sorrow lining his face.  “She wouldn’t
talk about it last night other than to say she wasn’t giving up on you,” he
whispered.

“I know she won’t.  That’s why it will hurt her the most.”

He nodded and took my hand.  Wordlessly, we left the
theatre.

*    *    *    *

Beatriz dropped me off after school on Thursday, and I watched
her pull away with relief.  Tonight marked the first night of my last week.  No
more chant.  No more hiding.  Four weeks had passed since the shooting along
with several Brian sightings.

I walked into the house and dropped my books on the floor.

“A lot of homework?” Gran asked from the stove.  I shrugged
and went to sit by Aunt Danielle, who watched me closely.

“Giving up the pretense?” she asked quietly when I sat.

“Maybe,” I whispered back closing my eyes.  “I don’t know.”

They left me alone through dinner.  I stayed next to Aunt
Danielle not wanting to eat.  Restlessness grew.  My mom noticed and suggested
I go for a quick walk around the block before dark.  Tugging on my jacket, I
slipped out the door pretending not to notice her tears or Gran’s consoling
embrace.

My feet carried me on the long walk to Morik’s house.  I
stood outside staring at the dark windows remembering the fun we’d had inside.

“I didn’t look up that night,” Brian said behind me,
startling me.  I whirled to face him.

He didn’t look at me, but watched the house.  He looked
clean and amazingly composed.  The sallow complexion and weight loss remained
unchanged.  He stood a few steps away, his hands empty and at his sides.

“What night?” I asked eyeing his bulky jacket wondering at
the contents of his pockets.  Did he have the gun?  I blinked against the sting
in my eyes.

“Of that party.  When they take over,” he twitched when he
said it, “you can’t see them.”

I remained quiet understanding what he said.  He’d meant to
shoot Ahgred.

“He still controls me or tries to.  I figured how to keep
him out,” he said with a pleased tone turning his flat look on me.

Shivering, I struggled to maintain eye contact.

“It’s you,” he whispered.  “He can’t control me when I think
of you, or watch you.”

My deal with Morik protected him, but not in the way I’d
intended.

“I’m so sorry, Brian.”

He nodded absently and went back to watching the house. 
“Will that one come back?”

I turned away so he wouldn’t see the grief in my eyes.  “I
don’t think so.”

“I watched you with him,” he admitted.  “The night before I
shot him.  You danced with him.  Why?”

A slight rustle of material indicated he moved.  I glanced
back at him, worried, but he had only placed his hands in his pockets.

“He’s different than the other one,” I said cautiously.  The
vibrant colors of the sun cut through the evening clouds reminding me of the
time.  “I have to start walking back, Brian.”

He nodded, but didn’t move out of my way.  “Not safe for you
after dark, is it?”

The way he said it, froze my insides with fear.  “Brian?”

“Tell me why, Tessa,” he insisted.  “Why did you dance with
him?”

Something within me let go.  It didn’t matter anymore.  This
fear and uncertainty.  I’d already determined my family would be fine without
me.  Sad, yes, but they would survive losing me.

A soft smile on my lips, I gave him the answer he wanted. 
The truth.

“I love him.”

Fire ignited on the surface of my skin, connecting the top
of my head to the end of my mark in an instant.  Instead of fading, the burn
intensified sinking deeper into the tissue completing the link.  I gasped in
pain.

Brian watched me dispassionately, pulling something from his
pocket.

“That’s what I thought,” he nodded to himself pushing me
toward Morik’s house.

I stumbled along struggling to focus past the pain.  Morik’s
link.  Completed.  If he were dead, that shouldn’t be possible, should it? 
Excitement and hope bloomed.  Brian’s hand, loosely holding a gun and reaching
around me to indicate the door, killed my hope.

“Open it,” he directed.  “Sun’s almost down.  We’re safe in
here.”

Numbly, I twisted the knob.  The door swung open.  A foul
smell, rancid garbage, permeated the air.  Dirty dishes mounded in the sink.  I
frowned at the sight remembering that we’d cleaned up after dinner.

“Ahgred can’t reach us in here.  It’s the only place I’ve
been able to sleep in weeks.”

His cleaned up state made more sense.  I stepped inside and
heard Brian enter behind me.  “Now what?” I asked without turning.

“We wait just a minute.  It won’t take long,” he promised,
moving to walk around me.  He positioned himself so I stood between him and the
door.

We watched each other as the bold pink highlighting the sky
faded to a dusky blue.  A sound like a distant train approaching caught my
attention.  Before me, Brian quivered, his skin taking on a grey hue.  His eyes
did not waver from what he watched just behind me.

I turned to watch the door fearing the dark more than
Brian’s gun.  No lights turned on outside the house as the sun completely fell
behind the horizon.  Darkness consumed everything through the open doorway.