Toxic Secrets (4 page)

The one time we did end up on the side of the road was the result of me not paying attention to the mileage. The fuel gauge on my nineties model Maxima had stopped working a couple of years ago, so now I had to reset the miles every time I filled my car with gas. Kendra was near hysterics, and I had to remind her that we were only a couple of blocks from a gas station… and that we carried around cell phones solely for this type of situation—not to text or tweet or Facebook or Instagram all day. I also threatened to leave her if she posted my idiocy on Facebook.

Reed ended up being our hero for the day and stayed true to his word to never tell a soul, including Phillip.

When Kendra got in the car, I told her about the texts from Phillip the night before and how we were going to have our special talk this morning. My stomach twisted in knots all morning, and it only got worse the closer we got to school.

As I pulled into the parking lot, I saw Phillip leaning against his 4Runner already waiting on me. I quickly closed my eyes and inhaled a deep breath. Seeing him standing there set my nerves into the red zone. The bile had made its way up to my esophagus at that point.

“Kendra, please don’t leave me,” the panic in my voice was too obvious.

Kendra looked at me with dismay. “Oh Court… I would never leave you alone with him. I was planning on making myself comfortable right here anyway.” Reaching over, she rubbed my arm as comfort. “I even have Reed on standby in case Phillip acts out.”

The air wheezed in and out of my lungs as I was on the verge of a full blown panic attack. I took a deep breath and let it out slowly and calmly. The sad part was, I didn’t know if my nerves were because of my fear of Phillip’s response or if I was just excited to be close to him again.

“You got this, sweetie. No worries,” Kendra said with empathy.

Taking a few deep breaths, I gave myself a quick pep talk, and stepped out of the car.

There he stood with his arms crossed over his chest. All six feet, three inches of pure lean muscle hiding under the letterman jacket I used to wear. The memory of walking around with that coat on like I was the queen and Phillip as my king was still fresh in my mind. Our love was never a fairytale. I just used to think it was.

His full lips pulled to the side in a sexy smirk, and those deep brown eyes were raking me over from head to toe.
How can someone look like a god, but act like the devil?

I could feel my heart beating in my throat the closer I got. I silently prayed to God that I wouldn’t pass out.

Phillip pushed off from his 4Runner and took a couple of steps to meet me. “Can I give you a hug?”

Not wanting to start off on the wrong foot, I nodded. His arms engulfed me, and he gently rested his chin on top of my head, his tall frame towering over me. I used to think I was protected in his arms, but I learned long ago that I wasn’t. Feeling conflicted on whether to hug him back or not, I lightly laid my hands on his sides instead. He gently swayed back and forth, holding me to him tight. “I miss you,” he whispered.

Why does he have to say things like that to me?

I missed this—being in his arms… smelling him… feeling him… I wanted to taste him.

Then it clicked. This was a mistake. I realized what he was doing and pulled away before he could screw with my head any longer. I tried to gather myself together. Then, clearing my throat, I tried to swallow the lump of nerves that had formed.

Surprisingly, he let me go.

“I need to talk to you about something, so just hear me out before you interrupt me. And we don’t have much time before the bell rings, so…”

Phillip gave me a questioning look, rolling his hand signaling for me to continue.

Taking a deep breath, I blurted everything out about wanting us to remain friends and me dating other guys without any repercussions from him. And how I wanted us both to be able to move on and still remain civil to one another.

He was steadfast poker-faced.

Not. A. Word. No emotion shown. Just silence.

Oh Lord, please say something.
“Phillip?”

He was still staring at me, but not really looking at me, like he was thinking, possibly weighing his options.

“Okay, it looks like you’re not quite ready to continue this conversation, so we’ll catch up later,” I explained nervously. “I’m heading to class.” I had a bad feeling about this. I took a step back toward my car, preparing myself to run if I needed to.

“Courtney, don’t—”

I turned back to face him. “Don’t what?” Those two words could mean so many different things.

“Don’t leave yet,” he coughed a couple of times before pausing. “I’m fine with us being friends, and, although I’m not thrilled about the dating, I know there is nothing I can do about it.”

I couldn’t figure out if he was being sincere with me or if he had some kind of trick up his sleeve.

“So you promise to not go loco if you see me with a guy?” I said, wincing.

He leaned back comfortably against his 4Runner again. “Yes, as long as you do me one favor,” he agreed with deceit in his eyes.

Bingo! There it is.

“What,” I said nonchalantly. I wasn’t very good at trying to play it cool.

“I ask that you not date anyone from school. Ever.”

I twisted my lips to the side like I actually had to consider it. “And if I do?”

He pushed himself off his 4Runner again, stepping closer to me. He stopped inches from bumping up against me, his voice dropping to a low and sexy tone. “I can’t promise you Phillip with a halo,” he smirked, making a circular motion above his head. His eyes never leaving mine.

 My insides were unstable. He was seducing me, controlling me, and giving me what I wanted all at the same time.

There wasn’t anyone at school I was interested in, and the one date I was going on was with someone that didn’t even live here. This was turning out to be easier than I thought.

“Deal. I’ll keep my end of the bargain as long as you keep yours,” I said without letting his close proximity affect me. I reached out and laid my hand on Phillip’s arm. “It makes me happy to be able to talk to you as a friend and not an enemy. Let’s not screw this up,” I suggested.

“I won’t if you won’t.”

Rolling my eyes without him seeing me. I knew somewhere, somehow, this niceness wouldn’t last.

“Well, we better hurry. The bell has already rung, and the tardy bell will be next,” I chimed.

I took off jogging back to my car to get my book bag and to let Kendra know I survived… and that she was right.

Chapter 4 ~ Dressed to Impress

Friday had finally arrived, and I was truthfully looking forward to having a good time tonight on our blind/double date with Kendra, Reed, and Jaxon. The rest of the school week ended “without a hitch” as they say in the South, and I was hoping my night ended with the same results.

Phillip was behaving himself better than I had ever imagined, and, as much as I wanted to believe things had changed, I couldn’t. It would only be a matter of time before the right incident ignited his fuse and he blew up. When I thought things were too good to be true, they usually were.

I knew I shouldn’t have such a negative outlook, but I knew him all too well and he wasn’t one to change overnight—he was the master of disguise.

Phillip had a basketball game that evening at another county school, so I knew he wouldn’t be making an appearance at the party. Actually a lot of the students from my school wouldn’t be attending tonight since the party was being thrown by a classmate from my old school, which also happened to be our biggest rival.

With our make-up already applied, Kendra added the final touches to my natural curly hair while I sat in front of the vanity in her enormous bathroom. She had flat-ironed my hair before curling it, giving me big ringlets falling loosely in the back. She kept my back to the mirror, not letting me look until she was finished. Kendra kept her golden hair straight, only running the flat-iron over it to give it a smoother look, then added a French braid to the side with it ending right behind her ear.

The black skinny jeans Kendra picked out for me snugged my ghetto booty just right, and the silver sequined tank with silver peep toe platform pumps matched perfectly. Kendra paired up a royal blue sequined party dress that displayed a lot of cleavage with gold platform pumps.

Passing me the hand mirror, Kendra displayed a self-appreciated smirk, obviously admiring her handiwork. “Okay, you can look now.”

Examining the back of my hair, I then turned around to look in the full length mirror. It was perfect. She had gathered most of my hair on the sides, pulling it together in the back and leaving a few tendrils hanging by my face.

“I tried to pull most of it off your neck so you won’t get too hot while dancing.”

“Well I must say you did a fabulous job as always. Thanks, doll,” I said, blowing her a kiss.

“And I give many thanks to the marvelous make-up artist,” she said in her best British accent.

We both stood in front of the floor length mirror primping before grabbing our iPhones to take a few selfies.

Still using her British accent, Kendra added, “We should just call ourselves Mary Poppins because we’re practically perfect in every way… or at least pretty damn close.”

We were both laughing when Kendra screamed and jumped as her phone buzzed in her hand. It was Reed texting to see if we were coming because they were already there waiting on us.

I had made Kendra agree to drive separate from the guys because I didn’t want the whole awkward car ride to the party with Jaxon while she and Reed were enjoying the comfort of one another. She had tried to convince me that she would ride in the back with me, but I knew her tactics, and she would sabotage me and stick me in the back seat with Jaxon. She often forgot I wasn’t the social butterfly she was. I was socially challenged.

“Shit, I didn’t realize what time it was. We are late,” Kendra huffed.

She quickly texted Reed back letting him know we were on our way.

We scrambled around, throwing a few necessities into our clutch purses, then made a mad dash down the stairs.

Kendra had my wrist in a tight grip, pulling me down the steps behind her. I felt like I was seconds away from falling. “If you don’t let go of me, we will soon be on our way to the hospital instead of a party. I’m about to break my ankle in these heels.”

I envied Kendra with her graceful way of waltzing around as if she were wearing slippers and not five inch stilettos. She used to practice walking the runway when she decided she wanted to be a model. That little hobby ended up lasting for about six months.

Kendra’s mom waltzed into the foyer with a smile of pride on her face. “Oh my goodness, you girls look beautiful,” she exclaimed. She was pulling her phone out, I’m assuming to take pictures of us.

“Mom, we don’t have time for pictures,” Kendra whined. “We took some already, I will send them to you later.”

“Now, where did you say you girls were going again?”

“The Russells are throwing a Christmas party.”

We actually were going to a party thrown by Jake and Jessica Russell, but not a party their parents were aware of. The Russells were well-known in our town and owned a couple of car dealerships. Every year they hosted a Christmas party at their home, but this year their twins, Jake and Jessica, had decided to host their own party at their lake house.

“Yeah, yeah. That’s right. I remember now. I loathed declining the invite, but I just don’t enjoy going when you’re dad isn’t accompanying me. Speaking of, your dad called earlier and said he’s stuck in Chicago for another day. They are having record snowfall up there. He is so miserable being stranded at the airport.”

I loved Diana like my own mother, but, boy, could that lady talk. I always figured one of the qualifications of becoming a hairdresser was exceptional communication skills. Well… that and gossiping. If you ever needed to know any good juice on anyone, Diana was the lady to see.

Kendra held her hand up to stop her mom from rambling any further. “Mom, we are very late, and Reed is waiting on us. Bye! I love you.”

“You girls have fun and be careful,” Diana said, giving us each a kiss on the cheek.

We hurried out the door before her mom could delay us any longer.

“Love you, and be home before midnight,” she yelled as we got in Kendra’s car.

“We will, and we love you too, Diana,” I shouted back.

It took us at least twenty minutes to find our way to the secluded lake house. The gravel driveway was about a mile long, and, since Kendra’s car sat so low to the ground, she had to drive at a snail’s pace. The drive was spooky as hell, so I decided to have a little fun scaring Kendra. I started by telling her about Crystal Lake and how all these kids had been partying in a cabin when a guy wearing a hockey mask went on a killing spree.

“I’m going to literally kill you if you don’t shut the hell up about this Jason guy,” she said through gritted teeth.

She loathed horror movies as much as I loved them.

“I’m sorry, I’m just trying to have a little fun at your expense to ease my nerves,” I laughed.