Trouble Walks In (16 page)

“It's been a damn long time since I've seen
you
, Mads. Not the
I'm-fine-I'm-tough-nobody-has-to-worry-about-me
smile—that's the one you give your fancy clients in the city or your coworkers or the big-money bankers who sign off on those sky-high mortgages. No, Mads. That's not the smile I'm talking about. I hadn't seen a real one on you until tonight at the wedding, when you were dancing like you didn't have a care in the world.”

Maddy's vision blurred as tears stung her eyes and a wave of vulnerability swamped her. Even if she wanted to say something now, she wouldn't have been able to.

“No, baby. The real you? That was in the smile you flashed when you saw this little tree. It was open and full of life. In that moment, you were the wild, free, spirited woman that you have always been.”

Ronan stopped about a foot away from her. Her head and heart were swimming with gratitude and affection. No one had ever seen her so clearly. It was more than that though. Ronan was able to see what she truly needed. He understood her wants and desires, ones she hadn't admitted to herself or even dared to consciously entertain.

He cupped her face with both hands and brushed away a tear with his thumb. Maddy's eyes fluttered closed, and she reveled in the rough, manly feel of his palms while his words settled over her like a warm blanket.

“I can't get you out of my head. You're the first person I think about every morning, and when I lay in bed at night
alone
, it's your face I see when I close my eyes.” Ronan's voice wavered, and he drew in a shuddering breath. “I am in love with you, Madolyn Morgan, and I want to spend the rest of my life finding out how many different ways I can put that smile on your face.”

Her heart beat wildly against her chest, and she curled her hands over his. Maddy worked to steady her breathing because it seemed to be racing out of control—but then again, that's how she felt almost all the time lately with Ronan. The tight grip she'd been using to hold on to her life was slipping away, all due to him.

Her heart and soul were in free fall, and the chasm was so deep that there was no end in sight. The vast unknown loomed, terrifying and exhilarating. Anticipation buzzed in her blood, and heart spinning, Maddy opened her eyes to be met by Ronan's glittering stare.

She finally understood why it was called
falling
in love.

“Please say something,” Ronan murmured. His greenish-blue eyes glimmered in the firelight. “You're killin' me.”

She searched his eyes, and even though she ached to tell him how desperately she loved him, the glimmer of fear clung to her like an anchor. Maddy knew, better than anyone, what the risks could be when you offered your heart completely to another human being—when you gave away a piece of your soul. She opened her mouth, but the words wouldn't come.

All right, then. If she couldn't tell him what he meant to her tonight, she would damn well show him.

“No more talking.” Maddy rose up on her toes and captured his lips with hers. Her fingers immediately went for the buttons of his shirt. A groan of pleasure rumbled in Ronan's throat as they kissed, his tongue pressing deeply into her mouth. He grabbed the hem of her sweater, and they broke the kiss long enough for him to whip the garment over her head, then toss it casually aside. Maddy laughed and shook her curly hair from her face before pushing his shirt off his shoulders. Her suspicions about how well built Ronan had to be were all on point. His perfectly sculpted chest, with a dark dusting of hair, was a feast for the eyes.

She let out a soft sound of appreciation and trailed the fingertips of both hands over the dips and valleys of his ripped belly. A thin trail of dark hair disappeared below the waistband of his trousers, the dark fabric doing little to hide his arousal. Maddy ran one hand over the bulge hidden there, and the heat of it in her palm almost made her lose it completely.

“Careful, babe,” Ronan ground the words out between his teeth. He grabbed her wrists and tugged them against his bare chest. “You're getting ahead of yourself. If you keep that up, this is gonna be a short night.”

“We can always do it more than once,” Maddy murmured. “In fact, I was counting on it.”

“I knew you were the perfect woman.”

Ronan covered her mouth with a savage possessive kiss, and Maddy sank into the strength of his embrace. He unhooked her lacy black bra and peeled it from her body with all the ease of experience, never once breaking his thorough kiss.

She shivered and let out a satisfied sigh when he tugged her against him, their heated flesh meeting in a satisfying slap. Maddy linked her arms around his neck and threaded her fingers through his short hair. Without warning, Ronan dropped to his knees and trailed kisses over her breasts, then took one nipple into his mouth and suckled hard. Maddy groaned and tossed her head back, holding him against her. Tiny zings of pleasure fired to her core as he licked and suckled first one breast and then the other.

“You're so beautiful.” Kneeling in front of her, Ronan lifted his head and peered up at her. His fingers dug into the soft flesh of her waist and he growled, “I want to see all of you, Maddy. I want to see every single inch of your gorgeous body. No more barriers.”

Maddy bit her lip and nodded. She went to unbutton her jeans but Ronan grabbed her hands and shook his head slowly, then gently pushed her hands away. A wicked grin curved his lips as he undid the top button and slowly pulled the zipper down.

“Put your arms over your head,” he whispered.

The sharp angles of his face were highlighted by the flickering light of the fire, turning him into something almost dangerous. The heated look in his eyes, combined with the possessive and almost rough way he touched her, made her weak with desire. Maddy complied and stretched her arms above her head, reveling in the heady combination of carnal lust and vulnerability.

Ronan tugged her jeans over her hips and down her legs, taking the flimsy thong right along with them. He held her waist with one hand and helped her step out of her clothes. Maddy dropped her arms and pressed one hand to Ronan's cheek. With lust in his eyes, he stared at her from her head to her toes and back again. His scruff-covered jaw was rough against her palm, a beard already beginning to peek through, and she simmered beneath the heat and intensity of his gaze.

“Tell me what you want, Mads.” Ronan ran one hand up her belly and then between her breasts, before trailing his fingers lightly over one of her sensitive nipples. “Making you smile isn't all that I want to do. Bringing you pleasure, in every single way possible, is my new mission in life.”

“You,” she said in a shaky whisper. “I want
you
, Ronan.”

His reflexes lightning fast, Ronan rose to his feet and swept her up in another knee-buckling kiss. He wasn't the only who needed more. She reached between their eager, heated bodies and made quick work of freeing him from the confines of the unyielding fabric. When his hot length settled in her palm, Ronan groaned and deepened their kiss, swiftly stepping out of the tux pants and kicking them aside.

As amber firelight flickered over the broad expanse of his back, Maddy trailed her fingers over his heated flesh, his muscles moving and flexing beneath her touch. She went to reach for him again, but he bent down, quickly unhooking the leather gun holster around his ankle. The reality of his job and who he was came roaring back, but Maddy shoved it aside.

Tonight he wasn't a cop. For tonight, at least, he was hers.

He gave her a sheepish grin before placing the gun and holster on the coffee table.

“Sorry, Mads.” He gathered her naked body against his and slid his hands over her ass, tugging her against his solid heat. “Now where were we?”

“Right about here,” she murmured against his lips, then reached between them and curled her fingers around him. “Or here?”

She moved her hand up and down the silky, steely flesh and he groaned. Maddy felt a surge of bravery. What had she been worried about? This man not only loved her, but also wanted her with a ferocity she had never encountered. Lovemaking before had been satisfying but had never burned with this new intensity. The stuff she had always seen in the movies or read about in books was now a reality.

Maddy pressed kisses to his collarbone as she worked him in her hand, heady with the scent of musk and sex. She let out a satisfied sigh. Part of the turn-on was finding out what Ronan enjoyed and what she could do to get him to make that guttural groan again. Each time it rumbled in his chest, matching heat ran through her. She popped onto her toes and captured his lips with hers. One hand threaded through his hair, and the other continued to learn the feel and shape of him. With each stroke, he held her tighter, and his kiss devoured her.

Breathing heavily and with his shoulders heaving, Ronan broke away and picked Maddy up, forcing her to release him. She yelped with surprise that quickly dissolved into a laugh as she wrapped her legs around his waist and clung to his neck, burying her face there. She licked and suckled at his throat while he settled his hands around her ass and carried her to the chair.

Ronan set her down on the enormous soft cushions, and Maddy let out a sound of disappointment as he pulled away. But he didn't stay gone for long. He dropped to his knees again and hooked his arms under her thighs before tugging her so that her bottom was the edge of the cushion. Maddy gripped the arms of the chair, eyes wide and tight with anticipation, and struggled to catch her breath.

With that cheeky grin on his face and mischief dancing in his eyes, Ronan dove deep. Maddy cried out when his mouth covered her sex. He held her open, licking and suckling her clit with swift, sure strokes of his tongue. Maddy writhed as the pleasure, almost unbearable in its intensity, fired through her body. Ronan held her tightly in place. She closed her eyes and let her body sink into wave after sensuous wave. Maddy arched her back and fought the orgasm as it curled tight and deep in her belly. She didn't want it to end. No yet.

She wanted him to fall over the cliff with her.

Then, as though reading her mind, Ronan released her from his grasp. Amid their heavy breathing and the winds howling outside, she heard rustling and a quiet curse word as he presumably searched for a condom. The sound of a wrapper crinkling confirmed her suspicions.

With her eyes closed and her body humming, Maddy was practically drowning in her eagerness and need. A moment later, Ronan's hand curled around hers and he pulled her to her feet, kissing her deeply. His erection pressed against her stomach, but only for a moment—then Ronan sat in the chair and pulled her to him.

Knowing what he desired and wanting to give it to him more than anything, Maddy settled both hands on his shoulders. She straddled him, her knees sliding between him and the soft leather of the chair. She briefly registered that contrast. The heat of flesh on one side and cool smooth leather on the other heightened the eroticism of the moment.

Ronan gripped her hips as Maddy bent, touching her lips to his. She hovered over the tip of his erection but she didn't take him inside. Not yet. Maddy flicked her tongue over his mouth and rocked her hips, teasing him with what was to come. She bit his lower lip playfully and dug her fingertips into the muscles of his shoulders.

“This is what I want, Ronan,” Maddy whispered against his mouth. Then, painstakingly slowly, she lowered herself onto his shaft. “Every. Single. Inch. Of. You.”

Ronan pulled her down hard, groaning and burying himself to the hilt. She moaned along with him as he filled her completely.

He moved and Maddy moved with him in unhurried, languid passes. Each roll of her hips put pressure in the sweetest of spots. Ronan's fingers gripped her ass tightly, and lust was stamped into his face as their pace increased.

Maddy shuddered and raised her arms over her head, riding him harder and faster. This was what she wanted. To lose herself in pure, unadulterated lust. She moved faster, needing and wanting to bring them both the climax they'd been chasing for months.

As Ronan's body tensed and shuddered beneath her with his climax, he shouted her name and Maddy collapsed on top of him as her own pleasure peaked.

She didn't know how long they stayed like that, bodies intertwined, skin sweat-slicked, his chest pressing and contracting with hers as their breathing slowed. But as the glow of the orgasm faded, reality came roaring back in.

Ronan's gun lay on the coffee table. The firelight cast shadows over it one moment and revealed all the ugly details the next.

That's what she had been doing with him.

One second she wanted to hide, and the next she felt compelled to reveal everything. Yet through it all, Ronan had remained steady. Solid. There was no waffling on his part, and perhaps that was part of what was scaring her. She squeezed her eyes shut and tried not to think about what might come next.

Was she really capable of giving Ronan what he wanted, or was the risk more than she could wager?

Ronan had never told a woman he loved her before. Not even his college girlfriend. He would say
Same here
or
Me too
but never, in all his years, had he told a woman he was in love with her—because it would have been a lie. He had even begun to believe that he wasn't capable of it. But Maddy had changed all of that.

He was trying not to think about the fact that she hadn't said it back.

She cared for him. That much he knew. Hell, she'd showed him over and over again last night, making love three times, and then once again this morning.

But she hadn't
said
it.

The sting of not hearing those words from her was a hell of a lot stronger than he had expected. He scolded himself for being such an idiot. The Christmas Eve festivities were underway, and all of the traditions he counted on and valued were in full swing. The Chinese food still got delivered even through the steady snowfall, and Ronan was currently standing in the doorway to the kitchen, shoveling the rest of the pork lo mein into his mouth right out of the white container.

Maddy sat by the tree with Jordan and her girls, and his brothers were sprawled on the massive leather sectional watching
It's a Wonderful Life
. The fire was roaring in the stone hearth, with the stockings his mother had knitted hanging off to the side. Jordan's mother, Claire, was chatting with his mom, and his dad was snoring away in the recliner.

It was a perfect scene. The woman he loved had blended into his big, loud family like she had always been a part of it. They were all together. They were safe.

Then why did he have an ache in his chest that wouldn't quit?

“Hey, man.” Gavin's voice pulled him from his private pity party. “What's going on? Are you sulking because Mom won't let Bowser in the main house?”

“I'm allergic to dogs,” his mother piped up from the other side of the big family room. “All that hair.”

“It's okay, Mom.” Ronan waved his chopsticks at her. “He's fine out at the cottage.”

“She's not allergic,” Gavin whispered. “When is she gonna admit that she just doesn't want dog hair on her furniture?”

“It's not a big deal.” Ronan went back into the kitchen and tossed the chopsticks and empty container in the garbage. “Maddy and I will head back out there after Mom does the Christmas pajama thing.”

“Okay,” Gavin leaned back against the granite counter and eyed Ronan warily. “Then why are you moping?”

“I'm not moping,” Ronan insisted.

“Yes, you are.”

“Forget it, okay?”

He snagged a beer from the fridge and popped it open before taking a long sip. Gavin kept staring at him, which was starting to piss Ronan off.

“Didn't Maddy stay with you out at the cottage last night?”

“Yeah.” Ronan grabbed the green ceramic cookie jar and pulled out two cookies, handing one to Gavin.

“What?” His brother took a bite and smirked. “Did you sleep on the sofa or something?”

“No. I didn't sleep on the sofa.” Ronan's tone was mocking but he couldn't hide his frustration. “Just forget it, man. It's embarrassing.”

“What? Did you forget how to do it?”

“Gavin!”

“Come on, man.” Gavin crossed to his brother and elbowed him, urging him on. “Obviously, you and Maddy have taken it to the next level, so—”

“I told her I'm in love with her,” Ronan blurted out.

“Whoa.” Gavin's playful expression settled into one of understanding. “That's big. Especially for
you
. What did she say?”

“Nothing.” Ronan let out a sharp laugh but kept his voice down and checked the door to reassure himself that they were still alone. “In fact, she told me to stop talking. Can you believe it? I finally fall in love
and
have the balls to say it out loud and—”

Gavin tried to conceal his amusement but failed miserably. His shoulders shook with the laughter he was trying to keep in. He held up two hands to apologize, but Ronan punched him in the arm anyway.

“Nice. Real sensitive, Gav.”

“I'm sorry,” Gavin said in a loud whisper. He backed up and glanced toward the still-empty doorway. “It's just…well… You
do
see the irony in all of this, don't you?”

“Yes, and it sucks.”

“Give her some time, Ronan. Think about it for a minute. You waited about thirty years to say those words, right? To take the big, bad leap into love.”

“Yeah, so?”

“Ronan.” Gavin let out a sigh and gave his brother a look that bordered on pity. “Maddy already made that leap once. She took it with Rick, and in the end…she lost him. Can you blame her if she's a little wary to take a chance again? And with a cop?”

“Oh man, some cop I am.” Ronan leaned back against the refrigerator and let out a curt laugh. He tipped his beer to Gavin. “Does it get any easier? This love stuff? Because, so far, I suck at it.”

“Some days yes, some days no.” Gavin slapped Ronan on the shoulder, then dragged his arm around Ronan's neck and pulled him into a solid hug. “Keep doin' what you're doin' and love her,” he said quietly. “It'll all work out.”

“Are you gonna kiss me now?” Ronan teased, breaking the unusually emotional moment between the two men. “Because your breath stinks.”

Gavin shoved him away with a curse and a smile.

“What are you two saps doing in here?” Tristan strode into the kitchen. He gave his brothers a look of disbelief before shaking his head solemnly. “Another one bites the dust, eh, Ronan?”

“Is it that obvious?”

“You mean, you and Maddy? You chased her like a puppy dog all through high school; looks like your perseverance has finally paid off.” Tristan jutted a thumb over his shoulder as he pushed past his brothers and pulled a beer from the fridge. “Never mind the sparks between you two at the rehearsal and the wedding, and it's no secret she stayed out at the cottage with you last night. I'm betting you weren't playing checkers.”

“No.” Ronan smirked. “No board games.”

“That's a bold move to go messing around with a woman who basically just got widowed.”

“I'm not messing around with her,” Ronan said, feeling defensive.

“Oh no?” Tristan's eyebrows lifted. “Then what are you doing?”

Silence hung between the three brothers, and Ronan didn't miss the knowing look the other two men exchanged.

“Taking the leap,” Ronan finally said.

“Yeah?” Tristan snorted with derision. “Better you than me. Don't get me wrong. She's a fine woman. Hell, both Jordan and Maddy are. They're beautiful, sexy, and smart—”

“And taken,” Ronan added.

Tristan's reputation with women was no less colorful than Ronan's had been. Maybe more so.

“I got it.” Tristan rolled his eyes. “What I
don't
get is the idea of settling down with one person forever. Mom and Dad are the exception to the rule, but most married guys I know are miserable. Monogamy is an outdated concept. So is love. At least that kind of love.”

“You live in LA,” Gavin scoffed. “What do you expect? Most of the people out there are only faithful in their own zip codes. You'll see. One day some woman will knock you right onto your cocky ass and make you question all that crap you tell yourself. I just hope I get to see it.”

“I'll second that.” Ronan raised his beer.

“Ain't nobody gonna live that long,” Tristan muttered. “But, hey, I'm happy for you guys. All I'm saying is that it's not for me.”

Ronan nodded his agreement. Until recently he'd felt exactly the same way—but Maddy had changed everything. He couldn't imagine being with or wanting anyone other than her, and the thought of Maddy with another man? Hell, no! That sparked a dark surge of jealousy and tripped a deep primal instinct to protect what was his.

Jealousy? That was also a first. The whole “love” thing was definitely going to take some getting used to.

“Boys!” Their mother poked her head in the kitchen and smiled broadly. “We're going to give out the Christmas Eve presents now. I hope the little ones like the jammies I bought them.”

His mother might enjoy Christmas more than anyone else on the planet.

“Be right there, Mom.” Gavin grinned and shook his head. “Do you think she'll buy us Christmas pajamas for the rest of our lives?”

“Yup.” Tristan arched one eyebrow and pointed at Ronan. “I can't wait to see Maddy's face when you open yours.”

“Oh man,” Ronan groaned. “I just hope they aren't matching sets.”

When he came through the door, he was greeted by Maddy's smiling face, and any tension in his chest immediately eased away. She had a pair of red satin pajamas draped over her arm and stood by the fireplace, admiring the felt stocking with her name written in silver glitter along the top.

“I see you found your stocking,” he said, then dropped a quick kiss on her cheek. “You like it?”

“Of course.” Her blue eyes glistened in the firelight, and she folded her arms over her breasts. “It was so thoughtful of your mom to include me like this.”

“Well, once she heard you might be staying for Christmas, and with the girls here… Mom didn't want to risk blowing the whole Santa thing,” he whispered. He moved in next to her and slipped his arm around her waist, pulling her against him. “If you didn't have a stocking, where would Santa put your goodies? Gracie and Lily are sharp as tacks. They would've spotted it immediately if Santa didn't fill a stocking for you. So she made this one for you. Mom is crafty, on every level.”

“True,” Maddy said with a giggle. “And she got me these Christmas pajamas.”

“
I
got you those. I picked them up in town the other day, just in case you decided to stay.”

“Thank you,” she whispered. “You really are full of surprises, McGuire.”

“Ronan!” His mother hurried over with a small package and handed it to him. “This one is for you.”

“Thanks, Mom.” He looked at the gift warily and prayed that it didn't contain pajamas fit for a five-year-old. “Keepin' the tradition alive.”

“That's what women do, dear.” She patted his cheek before turning to Maddy. “Now, Maddy, I know yours isn't a knitted stocking like the others, but—”

“It's beautiful,” Maddy exclaimed. She grabbed his mom's hand and kissed her cheek. “Thank you for welcoming me into your home like this.”

“Are you kidding?” Carolyn waved her off, but Ronan saw a hint of pride there. “That's what family is for, my dear. Now I have to hand out the rest, but this is the
only
present we do on Christmas Eve. All other presents come tomorrow with
Santa
!”

The girls squealed at the mention of the fat man's name, and Carolyn went right over to encourage the madness.

“She's amazing,” Maddy murmured. She ran her finger over the stocking with the Christmas tree design and Ronan's name stitched on top. “Carolyn knitted all of these?”

“She did.” He kissed the top of Maddy's head. “And she's been knitting her butt off since Jordan and Gavin got engaged to get four more done. Gracie, Lily, Jordan, and Claire all have Carolyn McGuire homemade stockings this year.”

“I haven't had a Christmas stocking in years,” Maddy murmured. She held Ronan's hand against her belly, and he noted the delicious way her body sank against his chest. “My mom had my old one in storage, but it got misplaced sometime between after she died and when we cleaned out the house. I never got a new one. Rick and I…”

Her body tensed, and she stopped talking.

“It's okay,” Ronan whispered into her ear. “Tell me. He was part of your life for almost a decade. Go on.”

“It's like I told you before. We didn't really have traditions like that. We didn't even get a tree. I'd make the pie but—” She spun in his arms, a look of panic stamped on her face. “The pie! Oh my God. I told your mother I'd make a pie for Christmas dinner tomorrow, but with the storm and the wedding, I forgot all about going to the grocery store. I am so embarrassed!”

A smile cracked his face. When she saw it, her expression shifted from total panic to mildly annoyed in a split second.

“Why does this amuse you?” She poked him in the belly, but he grabbed her wrists to stop her. “It's not funny, McGuire. After everything your mother has done, the least I can do is—”

“I have all of the ingredients in the cottage,” he said calmly. “It's taken care of.”

“What? How could you…?”

“You told me at Thanksgiving that your mom used that
Better Homes and Garden Cook Book
, the one with the picnic-table cover, right?”

“Uh…yes,” Maddy said slowly. Her body relaxed, and he tangled his fingers in hers. “I did but…”

“My mom has the same one.” He shrugged easily. “I took a gamble that I'd manage to talk you into staying for Christmas, and I wanted you to be able to make your pie.”

“Are you serious?” Her voice was quiet, laced with a hint of awe. He liked that. “You really did that?”

“I did.” He pressed a quick kiss to her lips. “So whaddya say we head back to the cottage and start cooking? It's about time for me to let Bowser out again anyway.”

As he and Maddy said good night to the others, Ronan knew without a shadow of a doubt that everything would be okay. Gavin was right—all he had to do was give Maddy time. Hell, it had taken him thirty years to say it. If he had to wait that long to hear it from her too, then he damn well would.

* * *

The kitchen in the cozy little cottage was small and outdated, and it didn't have state-of-the-art appliances like her place in the city. But as Maddy peeled the apples and cut them into slices, she noted what the cottage did have that her penthouse didn't.