Trouble Walks In (18 page)

Bowser moved faster and grew agitated—she was back there somewhere. Behind a stack of boxes, maybe? What the hell was she doing all the way up here? Ronan just prayed that the little girl was okay. His partner barked and whined, and when they reached the end of the room, Ronan held his breath. It was freezing in here, and if Gracie had been up here exposed for hours…

“Gracie!” Gavin shouted. “Gracie Ann McKenna, answer me right now.”

Then, just when Ronan thought he'd scream with frustration, Bowser jumped up to the right and barked loudly at what looked like a pile of blankets on top of a stack of three or four storage boxes.

But the blankets moved.

“Got her!”

Before he could reach the little girl, Gavin pushed past him. Ronan stepped back, giving way for his brother. He squatted down next to Bowser instead and ruffled the dog's ears, whispering words of praise. His partner licked his face in between panting breaths.

“Gracie!” The relief that filled Gavin's voice was music to Ronan's ears. “Baby, are you okay?”

Gavin pulled several blankets and coats off the sleepy little girl. She had on three different winter hats and a pair of mittens. She looked as surprised to see Gavin as he was happy to see her. It was no wonder she hadn't heard them calling to her all the way back here, nestled as she was in her deep pile. Ronan was just grateful that there were enough old comforters and sweaters for her to keep warm and that she had been resourceful enough to use them.

“What are you doing all the way up here?” Gavin pulled her off the stack of boxes, out from under the crush of old blankets, and into his arms. “Sweetheart, we've been worried sick and calling you all morning. Didn't you hear us?”

“I was tryin' to see Santa's sleigh.” She swiped hair from her eyes and yawned before hugging Gavin and settling her head on his shoulder. “Lily said I couldn't 'cause he's magic, but I fought I could be sneaky and see him up here 'cause it's so close to the sky. But I fell 'sleep.”

Ronan rose to his feet and exchanged a look of relief with his brother.

“Hi, doggie!” Gracie exclaimed as Bowser sniffed her sock-covered feet, dangling right near his nose. “He's ticklin' my toes.” She giggled. “Nana Carolyn is gonna be mad that you're in the house. Maybe 'cause it's Christmas you can stay.”

“Come on, kiddo.” Gavin kissed her cheek and headed out of the attic. “I have a feeling Bowser's not going to be banned to the cottage much longer. In fact, I bet Nana Carolyn is going to set him a place at the table for Christmas dinner.”

Ronan followed his brother out of the storage space with his partner, and they made their way back down to the first floor.

“We found her!” Gavin yelled as they reached the second floor. “Bowser and Ronan found Gracie.”

They were greeted by shrieks of joy, lots of hugs, and plenty of happy tears from the entire family. Bowser even got a hug from Ronan's mom. Maddy ran over and wrapped Ronan up in her arms, holding him tighter than she ever had before. He pressed his hand to her back. The woman was shaking like a leaf.

“She's okay,” Ronan whispered. He cradled Maddy's face in both hands. “A little cold, and annoyed that she didn't see Santa, but she's fine. Though I'm pretty sure my mom is going to put a lock on the storage door now.”

“I know.” Tears glistened in her eyes and she shook her head. “That's not it.”

“Then what?”

“She's not the only person you found.”

“How do you mean?”

“Me,” she said with a shuddering breath. “You found me. No matter how hard I tried to hide, you kept on searching.”

Maddy rose up on her toes and hugged her arms around his neck. She held on and pressed her lips against his ear, her body quivering against his.

“I love you, Ronan,” she whispered.

It was like getting the wind knocked out of him, and he needed a second to catch his breath. He tangled his fingers in her long, silky curls and pulled back to look her in the face. Her blue eyes glittered brightly and one tear fell down her cheek, but a smile was blooming across her lips.

“I do.” Her voice quivered, and she laughed. “I love you.”

“Merry Christmas.” Ronan pressed a kiss to her lips, gently and reverently, wanting to imprint this moment onto his memory forever. “I love you too, Mads.”

Bowser barked loudly, interrupting them, and they both burst out laughing. Maddy rested her head on Ronan's chest, and he reveled in the feel of her body as it sank against his. He stroked both hands down her back before hugging her tightly.

Could his life get any better than it was right at this moment? It was perfect, and that was what frightened him. His joy was infiltrated by fear that slithered in like a snake. He'd never had so much to lose before.

And it scared the shit out of him.

His thoughts went to Gavin and the pure fear in his big brother's voice. He had heard that tone from plenty of other people when he was on the job—family members and friends who were worried sick over their missing loved ones. But he'd never truly connected with it or fully understood it until today. He'd always been an outside observer before.

“Come on, you two!” His mother peeked her head around the archway that led from the front hall and into the living room. “It's time to give these little girls their presents from Santa. Now, I know
we
don't need any because we have our Gracie safe and sound, but I might have something in here for both of you.”

Bowser rose to all fours and whined.

“Oh fine,” his mom huffed, feigning irritation. “I might have a little something for you too. I have some leftover steak in the fridge with your hairy name on it. After all, you are the hero of the hour.”

Bowser looked at Ronan as though seeking permission, and he was happy to oblige. Ronan removed the harness and lead line from his partner and gave him another healthy dose of praise.

“Well, this certainly is a Christmas to remember.” Maddy watched Bowser leave before turning back to Ronan. “But let's not make losing a kid a new tradition.”

“Not a chance.”

Ronan winked and released her hand as she headed into the living room. No, he'd be happy without that addition. But there was one new aspect he'd like to continue. He wanted to wake up to Maddy's beautiful smile every morning for the rest of his life.

Maddy tiptoed out of the bedroom, careful not to wake Ronan or Bowser, who was snoring and hanging off the edge of the bed by Ronan's feet. She dragged on the huge, navy-blue NYPD sweatshirt, one of Ronan's gifts to her, to cover her nakedness and stretched her deliciously sore body. Their lovemaking last night had been the perfect end to one of the most memorable Christmases she had ever had.

Once she was up, though, guilt tugged at her for ignoring work for the past week. Unable to sleep, and with her trip back to the city imminent, Maddy decided to catch up nice and early. That way, she and Ronan could enjoy their last day in Old Brookfield without a huge to-do list hanging over her head.

She slipped into the living room, far chillier than the bedroom, and pulled her cell phone from her purse. As she did, she caught a whiff of Ronan's warm, musky scent still clinging to her body. She smiled and pulled up the sweatshirt's hood. He'd kept apologizing that he didn't have anything better to give her and swore he'd make it up to her, but she couldn't have loved anything more.

It was like being wrapped up in Ronan.

What could be better than that?

After turning on the fireplace with the handy little remote, Maddy sat in the big chair and pulled her knees to her chest beneath the sweatshirt. The tie she had given him for Christmas, a blue one with white dog bones on it, was dangling precariously off the coffee table. Maddy giggled at the sight of the living room strewn with discarded clothing, thanks to yet another sexcapade in front of the fire.

She turned on the phone and prepared herself for the slew of emails she was certain were waiting for her. Ignoring work wasn't smart or savvy, but it had been necessary. She'd badly needed the break. The truth was, she hadn't missed work.

Not one little bit.

Two voice messages were waiting for her, along with a litany of texts. All of the texts were from her assistant, Sharon, and were mostly about the party. Updates on numbers, the caterer, and so forth. The voice mails were more worrisome. Sharon would only call Maddy on her vacation if there had been a major problem.

Panic flickered up Maddy's back. Had that asshole Drummond done something? Had a deal fallen through?

“Damn it,” she whispered. “I know better than this.”

Maddy pressed the phone to her ear and listened to the messages. A knot of dread coiled in her belly as Sharon's teary voice echoed over the line.

Two more women had been murdered, and Maddy knew both of them.

Patricia Teagan and Yolanda Baquero.

Both women worked at high-end realty houses in the city. Patricia was an executive assistant, and Yolanda was a seasoned commercial real estate broker. They'd been friendly acquaintances.

Not anymore. Now Patricia and Yolanda were both dead. Killed by the same son of a bitch who had snuffed out the lives of Brenda and Lucille. What had Sharon said in her message? They were calling him the West Side Ringer. Maddy's stomach roiled at the sick name the media had come up with, all in the name of ratings.

Nausea flooded her, and she quickly grabbed the television remote, turning the set on and searching for the news. Tears stung Maddy's eyes as she cradled the phone in her lap and watched the morning report. Sure enough, an update on the West Side Ringer eventually flashed up on the screen. As the newscasters blathered on about the lack of leads on the city's latest serial killer, Maddy's thoughts darted back to the night of the wedding.

Ronan had taken a call from work.

She'd thought he was acting strange, and now she knew why.

“I'm sorry, Mads.”

Ronan's deep voice rumbled behind her, and his hand settled on her shoulder.

“Is this why you didn't want to watch the news?” she asked, her voice thick with tears. “You knew about this! Why wouldn't you tell me?”

Maddy rose to her feet and turned to face him. He was shirtless and wearing only the paw-print-covered boxer shorts she'd gotten for him. His dark hair was tousled from sleep, but his body and expression were completely alert.

“I know you're pissed.” He held up both hands and kept his voice calm. “But please hear me out.”

“The call you got during the wedding—that was about Patricia and Yolanda. Oh my God…” She backed up and pointed at him accusingly. “You lied to me. How could you do that, Ronan? I
knew
those women.”

He blanched visibly, and his jaw clenched. Ronan dropped his hands to his sides, and the muscles in his chest flexed, but he didn't make a move toward her. His expression darkened to one she couldn't quite read, and he looked as though he was trying to figure out exactly what to say.

Maddy's head was spinning, and her heart hurt. Two more women she knew had been brutalized, and the man she loved had lied to her about it. He'd kept the information from her like she was a fragile, broken woman who couldn't possibly handle the truth.

“You treated me like a child,” she said, seething.

“I'm sorry!” Ronan shouted. “You were finally
you
again, and I didn't want to do or say anything to change that.”

“Really?” Maddy folded her arms over her breasts and stared him down. “So,
you
get to decide when I find out two of my colleagues have been murdered?
You
get to choose when I get upset? Is that it?”

“No.” Ronan ran both hands over his face vigorously before letting out a growl of frustration. “Listen, Mads, with the wedding and then Christmas, I didn't want to dump news like that on you. I had planned to tell you about it today, before you left to go back to the city.”

Maddy studied him closely. The earnest expression stamped on his face tugged at her heart. She knew, deep down, he was telling the truth. He'd tried to protect her because he cared for her, and yet she still found it unsettling. Was this what life with Ronan would be like? Would he constantly be judging what she should or shouldn't know about? Was the cop in him, the protector, going to be judge and jury, deciding what information she needed and when?

She tore her gaze from his and headed for the bedroom. “I have to pack my things and get back to the city.”

Ronan's strong hand reached out and tangled with hers, preventing her from going any farther. Maddy stilled, their bodies wavering close and his warm, firm hand curled around hers like a blanket.

A conflicting storm of emotions swirled inside her. Grief for the women who had lost their lives dominated the swell, but there was more tangled within. Fear, however irrational, that Ronan's need to protect her would mean controlling her. But at the same time, there was immense love for the man who clearly put the feelings and needs of others ahead of his own.

“Please, wait.” Ronan's voice was quiet but filled with strength. “Don't leave like this, Maddy.”

“I trusted you,” she whispered. She forced herself to look him in the eyes. “I know you had the best of intentions. I never would have wanted you to share that horrible news in the middle of the wedding. But you should have told me when we got back here.”

“Maddy, I—”

“Wait.” She shook her head and screwed her eyes shut briefly. “I love you, Ronan. I do. And I know you love me. But that does
not
give you the right to treat me like a pathetic, fragile creature who can't handle herself.”

“Is that what you think?” His brow furrowed, and fury flickered in his eyes. “That I didn't tell you because I was worried you wouldn't be able to handle it?”

“Why else?” She tilted her chin, daring him to admit the truth.

“Because I knew it would hurt you.” Ronan cradled her face with both hands. “Seeing you unhappy or in pain kills me, Mads. I was putting it off, and I'm sorry for not being straight with you. I don't think you're weak. In fact, I think you're one of the toughest women I've ever known.” He let out a slow breath. “I was being selfish too. I'd waited so long to see that beautiful smile on your face… I didn't want to do anything that would make it go away.”

She pressed her hands over his briefly, then tugged them down from her face and nodded her understanding. Maddy stared at her fingers, tangled with Ronan's, and ran her thumb over his. He would always try to keep her from harm's way, to protect her from anything or anyone he saw as a threat—even if it meant keeping the truth from her.

If she planned on being with Ronan, that was a fact she would have to accept. But could she? Maddy didn't want to fight. She would put this away and deal with it later.

“It's okay,” she whispered. She rose on her toes and pressed a quick kiss to his cheek. “According to Sharon's message, Yolanda's wake is later today, and the funeral is tomorrow. I have to hurry. I'm sure traffic will be crazy, and it's going to take me forever to get back there.”

She tried to leave, but he hung on to one of her hands.

“I'll go with you.”

“No.” Maddy looked over her shoulder at him and squeezed his hand. “You stay with your family like you planned. I'll be fine. Really.”

Silence hung between them for three beats of her heart.

“Okay.” Ronan released her hand, but concern edged his handsome face. “I'll give you a lift back to your car at the inn.”

“Great,” Maddy said with a forced smile.

Right before she reached the hallway, Ronan called to her.

“I'm never gonna change, Mads.” His voice was serious and calm and edged with familiar arrogance. “I won't apologize for wanting to protect you.”

She glanced over at him, and her stomach fluttered. His muscular body was taut and primed as though ready for a fight, and his fierce stare bored into her. Unmovable. Unshakable. Resolute. The man wasn't going to give an inch—not on this, or anything else he believed in.

She hugged her arms around her chest in an effort to quell the uncertainty that bubbled up. Unable to say a word, for fear she would start blubbering like an idiot, Maddy simply nodded and gave him a tight smile.

As she packed her bags, uneasiness simmered in her belly. She was going back to the city to attend yet another funeral, and all she really wanted to do was have Ronan hold her and tell her it was all going to be okay. But doing that would only confirm what he had been afraid of in the first place. No, there would be no pathetic weepiness or crumbling.

Maddy would soldier on and move forward and get back to work and her life in the city. She had been good at that before, being on her own. Keeping her head down and buried in work. This ache in her chest, the feeling of the earth shifting beneath her feet, this was exactly what she had been afraid of. For a fleeting moment, Maddy longed for the numb anonymity she'd had before letting Ronan McGuire into her heart and her bed.

Ronan's jeans fell off the bedpost when she dragged her suitcase to the ground, and a paper fluttered to the floor from the back pocket. Maddy bent to pick it up, but she knew what it was before she even unfolded the smooth square.

Her eyes filled with tears.

It was the page from the
Better Homes and Garden Cook Book
. She unfolded the paper with shaking fingers. The words on the page blurred, but she didn't have to read them to know what was there. She knew that the apple pie recipe covered the well-worn page, and Maddy's heart swelled with love.

How could she be angry with him for wanting to protect her heart? This was the same man who went grocery shopping for a pie he wasn't even certain she would be around to make.

She was being an idiot.

Ronan wasn't some asshole trying to control her. He was a loving, thoughtful man who had attempted to put her happiness above his own. Maddy spun around and found herself face-to-face with him. That fiercely intense blue-green gaze was pinned to hers, and his eyes glittered in the morning light that spilled into the bedroom. The stubble on his chin seemed even thicker than usual and accentuated the dark, dangerous side of him, the one that both attracted and frightened her. It was that piece of Ronan that had driven him to become a cop, fueling his innate desire to protect those he cared for.

He stood in the doorway with his arms at his side and Bowser right behind him. Any anger Maddy had felt faded in an instant, like snow melting in the sun.

“I know you think I pulled a majorly stupid move by not telling you about what happened.” He took one step closer. “I've had an incredible time since I've been home with you. The best of my life, in fact. I don't want it to end like this, with you pissed at me. I'm no good at relationships, Maddy, probably because I've never really been in one before.

“Get ready, baby, because I'm gonna screw up a lot more. So I'm apologizing, in advance, for the dumb shit I'm gonna do, because I'm sure there'll be
plenty
of it. But know this: no matter what I do or say, I love you, Maddy Morgan. For the rest of my life, I'm going to work hard to ensure that you know that, and I'll try to keep the dumbass moves to a minimum.”

Overcome by love and gratitude, Maddy ran to Ronan. She latched her arms around his neck before burying her face in the comforting warmth of his throat. He let out a curse of relief as his arms curled around her, and he gave her a hug so tight that it stole the breath from her lungs.

“I'm sorry I got angry with you,” she whispered into his ear. “What happened to Yolanda and the others is just awful, and I thought that you were trying to—”

“I'm the one who's sorry.” Ronan pulled back and kissed her, brushing the hair from her forehead. “I'm no good at this relationship stuff.”

“Are you kidding?” Maddy laughed through her tears and curled her hands around his biceps, shaking him playfully. “That pie-shopping thing should be put in a handbook. You know,
The Guy's Guide to Being an Awesome Boyfriend
or something.”

“Boyfriend?” Ronan's eyebrow arched. “I like that.”