TVA BABY and Other Stories (13 page)

“… or form a book club,” said Captain Ordinary. This was what he was here for. “Read Jane Austen or, better yet, Kim Stanley Robinson.”

“Who’s she?” they all asked at once.

I
remember exactly when it all started, this incredible adventure. It was during
The Look of Love
, when she wakes up after the operation and sees her young doctor’s face for the first time.

This guy sits down in the seat next to mine. “Hey,” he says in a loud whisper.

“Sss k kh!” I said. She was smiling and saying, “Because a woman sees with her heart, not her eyes.”

“I need to talk to you.”

“You’re not supposed to talk in the movies.”

“How do you know? Why not?”

“Just because,” I said. This whole thing was making me nervous. I reached into my popcorn and he grabbed my wrist. It was my turn to say “Hey!” Nobody likes to be grabbed by a total stranger, especially at the movies.

He says, “Look at me,” so I do.

“You look perfectly normal,” I said, shaking his hand off my wrist. “So why don’t you return to your seat before I get the usher.”

“What usher?” he says. “Look around. Do you see anybody else in the theater at all?”

I looked around. It was a tiny theater, only about ten or twelve seats, and even in the dark I could see that all but ours were empty. The doctor was showing her flowers for the first time, so the bright colors made it easier.

“No,” I said. “There was just the two of us. And you were sitting back there, where you belong.”

“Why are there only twelve seats?”

“Beats me,” I said, “Now may I watch the movie, please?” They were walking down Fifth Avenue. She was amazed at the sights. She had been blind all her life, until just yesterday.

“How come there’s only one EXIT?” he whispered. “Aren’t movie theaters supposed to have several? Something’s not right!”

“Sk k kk k k,” I said. They had just stopped in front of Tiffany’s. She had never seen a diamond before.

“How come there’s no concession stand? No lobby? No restrooms?”

“I already have popcorn, “I said. I rattled the bag for proof. “And I never go to the restroom, I might miss something.”

“Miss what?” he said. “How many movies have you seen since you’ve been here?”

“A lot. I don’t count them. I just watch them.”

“Do you remember buying a ticket? Do you remember sitting down? Do you remember anything before the movies?”

“No,” I admitted. “Come to think about it, it is kind of peculiar.”

“Now you are thinking about things!” He took my hand in his, and I let him hold it. “Stella,” he said. “Something strange is going on here, and I won’t rest until I figure out what it is.”

His eyes were shining in the starlight (the doctor was showing her the stars) and suddenly he didn’t look so crazy after all.

“How did you know my name?” I asked. “How come I know yours is Frank?”

“Beats me,” he said, squeezing my hand. “But you are starting to wonder, to question things, and that’s good.” He stood up, pulling at me.

“Whoa,” I said. “Where are we going?” I didn’t want to lose my seat.

“The EXIT,” said Frank. “I intend to try it, to see what is on the other side, come what may. But I can’t do it—I can’t do anything, apparently—without you by my side.”

“Okay, okay,” I said. Oddly enough, I was feeling the same way.

I grabbed my popcorn and followed him to the EXIT door, which was down beside the screen.

It opened with a little bar, which he knew how to operate.

It opened onto a metal corridor, studded with rivets. There was no street, no traffic, no town. I looked both ways to check.

“Just as I thought: we’re in a spaceship,” he said.

“That’s absurd. It could be a submarine,” I pointed out. “Or a cruise ship, like in
Loveboat.”

“Submarine corridors are narrower,” Frank said. “Remember
Das Boot?
Two people could barely pass. And something tells me that this is no cruise we’re on. Come on!”

I followed him for what seemed centuries. He hadn’t brought his popcorn so we shared mine. The corridor was covered with moss, and vines popped out of the seams between the rivets. Sometimes we had to fight our way through them. There was rust everywhere.

“This ship, if it is a ship, is ancient,” Frank said. “This leads me to think it’s a starship, on a centuries-long journey. Remember
Destination: Arcturus?”

I did, but just barely. We had come to a door that said STARSHIP COMMAND. And just in time. We were out of popcorn.

It opened with a little thumb device. It opened like

a lens.

Frank stepped through and I followed. He had been right so far and I was beginning to trust him.

“Just as I suspected,” he said. There were controls everywhere, dials and buttons and screens. On one side of the triangular room were twelve glass coffins in two rows of six.

Frank walked between them with slow steps, shaking his head. “Don’t look, Stella,” he said.

But I couldn’t resist. Each held a mouldering corpse.

“The suspended animation must have failed,” he said. “Except for these two.”

The last two were empty, and open.

“Lucky for them,” I said.

“Stella,” Frank said, taking my hand, “Don’t you get it? Those two are us! You and I are the only survivors. If this starship is on a mission to populate a new world, which I suspect it is, now it’s up to us alone, you and me. We are Adam and Eve.”

It was all beginning to make sense. “That must be why we are naked,” I said. I had just noticed.

“And why you are so beautiful!” he said.

I covered up with my empty popcorn bag as best I could. He didn’t even try.

“But first, there are important questions to answer,” Frank went on excitedly. “What went wrong that the others all perished? And how did you and I survive the disaster? Who saved us? Who—or what?”

“Ship,” said a deep robotic voice. It seemed to come from everywhere.

“Who are you?” Frank asked.

“I am Ship. It was my job to keep you all alive, but I guess I fell asleep. Luckily you two survived.”

“Machines don’t fall asleep,” I pointed out.

“They do if they can’t stay awake,” said Ship. “I couldn’t help it. I can barely keep my circuits open even now.”

“Try,” said Frank sternly. “We need some answers. How long have we been on this journey, Ship?”

“Six thousand years.”

I gasped. That’s a long time.

“That’s six thousand of
my
years,” said Ship. “Your years are of course very different from mine. I am a quantum device.”

“How long in our years?” asked Frank.

“Five thousand, seven hundred and forty, point four.”

“We’ve been watching movies for almost six thousand years?” I asked, amazed.

“No,” said Ship. “You were in suspended animation, like the others, most of the time. You’ve only been watching movies, as you call them, for a week or so. It’s the orientation period.”

“Six thousand years is a damn long time,” said Frank. “The Earth we left behind must be changed beyond all recognition. Our only hope is to push on to our destination. How long before we arrive?”

“You’re there already,” said Ship. “Parked in orbit. It was my job to open all twelve pods upon arrival and sleep-walk you to the theater for gradual awakening and orientation.”

“That’s why there were twelve seats!” said Frank.

“I fell asleep and ten of you died, as I said. I guess I should be ashamed.”

“You
guess?”
I protested. He didn’t sound ashamed.

Ship didn’t answer. He had gone back to sleep.

“Some Ship,” I said disgustedly.

“The two of us survived and that’s the important part,” said Frank. “Now it’s our job to populate the new world that awaits us. I’m looking forward to it.” He gave my hand a little squeeze.

I looked around. The control room didn’t look very romantic.

“Not here, Stella, not now,” he reassured me. “First we have to find out where we are, and get down to the surface of the planet that will be our new home forever. The home of a new race of humanity forever. A new beginning.”

“Can you work the controls?”

“That could present a problem,” Frank said. There were controls everywhere. He studied them dejectedly. He even tried to awaken Ship, but without success. It worried me to see him losing his confidence.

“Maybe we should get dressed,” I said. “A proper uniform might help.”

“There’s an idea,” he said.

There was a drawer marked MEN filled with turquoise starship coveralls, and he pulled on a pair. The WOMEN’s drawer held only bras and panties.

“I guess this will have to do for me,” I said.

Meanwhile, Frank was already looking better, studying the controls with a broad smile. “This uniform apparently has some kind of memory-fabric,” he said. “For example, I know somehow that this gizmo opens the viewscreen. Let’s find out where we are. Are you ready for the first look at our new home?”

I held my breath as he pulled the little lever.

A lens opened on the front of the ship and we were looking down at a jewel-like blue planet suspended in space.

“It looks awfully familiar,” I gasped. “It’s …?

“It’s Earth!” gasped Frank.

“I have figured it out,” said Frank, minutes later. “Apparently some horrendous disaster was threatening and we were put into orbit so that humanity could survive. Put into suspended animation until it was over and we could safely repopulate our precious home planet, like Adam and Even, starting all over.”

“For six thousand years!” I said, amazed. “It must have been pretty bad.”

“Armageddon,” nodded Frank. “Nuclear, biological, who knows? Whatever it was, it must have annihilated everybody, man, woman and child. Luckily, the Earth itself seems to have recovered. The oceans are blue, and there are large green areas.”

“I hope there are animals,” I said. I was hungry. I already missed my popcorn.

“We’re about to find out,” said Frank. “There’s sure to be a Lander here on the ship somewhere. All we have to do is find it.”

Easier said than done. Ship was no help. Frank woke him with a shout and asked him where the Lander was parked, but Ship just replied, “I forget,” and went back to sleep.

“Machines don’t forget things,” I said. “He’s just lazy.”

“They do if they can’t remember them,” said Frank. He was beginning to look dejected again.

“Maybe the starship uniform knows the way,” I suggested.

“Stella, you’re my lucky charm!” Frank exclaimed, grabbing my hand. He led at a run and I followed down endless corridors tangled with vines. My feet were killing me by the time we found the door marked SALLY PORT.

There was no knob.

“Open,” said Frank. It was voice-activated and thanks to the uniform, he knew just what to say.

The door lensed open and there was the Lander, a nifty little saucer with twelve seats, which saddened us but only for a moment. “The two of us will be enough for what it is we have to do,” Frank said, squeezing my hand.

“Where are the controls?” I asked.

There weren’t any.

Just then, Ship woke up. “The Lander is automatic,” he said, “pre-programmed for descent and safe landing.” Then he went back to sleep.

“He may be lazy but he is programmed to awaken when we seriously need him,” said Frank. “All aboard!”

I could tell he was excited by the prospect of starting the human race all over again. By this point, so was I, his Eve.

I squeezed his hand and we got in.