Twice Blessed (36 page)

A fist struck the front door followed by a shout of, “Open the door!
”

She took one step toward the back door, then another, hoping no shadow would reveal where she stood. Her breath snagged on the fear halting her heart
.

“
This is the sheriff. Open up, or we'll take down the door
.”

Time and hope and all her dreams had run out. She turned and pulled the quilt off the settee. Throwing its dark side over her shoulders, she fled through the kitchen and out into the night, far from the men milling around the front porch
.

She had to leave
.

Now … because it was too late
.

Behind her, she heard, “She has to know
.”

“
How could she not know?” another voice asked
.

“
Only a fool wouldn't have known
.”

At that voice, which should not be here in Fort Pixton, Kansas, she stopped with her hand on the door knob. Turning, she saw a man standing in the door to the parlor. His hands were hidden behind his back. Not Miles, but Noah. No one in Fort Pixton would understand, but she had thought Noah would
.

“
Only a fool wouldn't have known,” he repeated
.

“
Then I was a fool.” Her own voice was steady, even as her heart thumped with both yearning and fear that he would walk away from her forever. “I was young, and he was charming. He charmed people in the bank, and he charmed me. If I had been wiser then, I might have seen through his pretense
.”

“
Only a fool wouldn't have known.” He drew his hands from behind his back. In them was a noose. Walking to her, he slipped it over her head. It dropped to rest on her shoulders. He reached to tighten it, but she caught his hands
.

“
I must be a fool,” she whispered as she lifted the noose from over her head, “for I fell in love with you.” Letting the rope fall to the ground, she put her hand up to touch his cheek. “And I cannot fall out of love with you
.”

“
Do you want to fall out of love with me
?”

“
No!
”

The cry in her dream rang through Emma's head as she opened her eyes and stared out into the gray light of morning. The same nightmare had haunted her every night for the past week. During the day, another nightmare had stalked her. She had thought so many times of what she would say to Noah if she could have even a minute alone with him. Between sitting with Sean and trying to keep him entertained with stories and drawing so he remained quiet and her work at the store, where she had refused to answer any questions her neighbors posed about what had left her face with such a bruise, she had seen Noah so seldom he might as well have been living out at his farm.

Last night, his younger brother, a pleasant man who was trying his best not to appear out of place in Haven, and Mr. Evans, an attorney from Chicago, had arrived. Noah had spent the evening talking with them behind the closed parlor doors. She would not have been turned away if she had knocked, but she had not.

Rolling to her other side, she saw Noah's side of the bed was undisturbed … again. She sat and leaned her forehead in her hands. It had been her suggestion, after all, that they simply
pretend
to be a happy family. She should not fault him for agreeing, especially when that plan could gain him the very thing he wanted—custody of Belinda.

Emma got dressed, making certain that her hair, for once, would remain in its chignon. Then she went to help Gladys with the children. Even Belinda seemed to understand the importance of the hearing, for she was unusually subdued. When he wobbled as he came down the stairs, Emma did not ask Sean if he would rather stay home. She knew how much he wanted to be there.

She smoothed the pointed hem of her short gray coat over her skirt. Its sedate navy piping around the collar matched what was sewn along the hems of her sleeves and skirt. At her throat, she had closed the collar with a round pin decorated with garnets. She set her gray silk bonnet on her hair and turned as she heard the door from the kitchen open.

Noah's brother, Ronald, was so tall his head brushed the top of the doorway. His hair was a brighter red than Noah's, and his black suit was unquestionably more elegant. His expression was grim. Behind him came Mr. Evans, who was as short as Lewis Parker. A pince-nez sat on his nose, bobbing with each step.

Emma noticed them in the moment before Noah walked toward her. In the fine suit he had worn when he stood in front of Reverend Faulkner with her, he caused her heart to quiver. She longed to press her face to his chest as his arms came up to enfold her. She hurried to tie the ribbons on her bonnet before the very sight of him disintegrated the serenity she had carefully constructed during the past week.

“Ready?” Noah asked.

“Yes.” She arranged on her lips the smile she had practiced all week. Taking Sean's hand, she felt her smile slip when Belinda grabbed her other hand and then reached for Noah's.

Over the children's heads, Noah's gaze held hers for only a moment. He led them out onto the porch and down the street toward the courthouse. The road was lined with wagons and horses tied beneath the trees on the green. Her neighbors stood in front of every house they passed. Most of them fell into line behind, creating a bizarre and oddly silent parade toward the courthouse.

Noah lifted Belinda into one arm and put his other one around Emma's shoulders as they climbed the steps to the courthouse door. She did not relax against his strength, for if she let her poise falter even a moment, she might fall utterly apart.

As they entered the short hall that led in one direction to the town offices and in the other to the courtroom, her steps slowed. Laird Gilson waited by the single door that opened into the courtroom. She heard Sean mutter something under his breath, but said nothing as Noah herded her past his enemy.

Gilson started to speak. The man beside him hissed him to silence, and Emma guessed the rail-thin man was Gilson's attorney. Rail-thin? A better description would be serpent-thin.

The courtroom was so crowded that every seat on the four benches was full. More spectators were pressed against the walls.

Emma did not look to the left or right as she walked with Noah to a table in front of where Judge Purchase would be sitting. The jury box was empty, for the judge would make his decision on Belinda's future alone.

When Noah drew out a chair at the table, Emma sat and took Belinda onto her lap. Sean went with Gladys and Noah's brother to where a spot was being cleared on one of the benches for them. Noah glanced back toward the door.

“Who are you looking for?” Emma asked quietly.

“It won't matter if they don't get here in time.” He looked from his pocket watch to the door.

“I think everyone in town is already here.”

“Yes.” He sat beside her. “I can take Belinda, if you wish.”

“It might be better,” Mr. Evans interrupted as he set a stack of papers and a thick book on the table, “if Mrs. Sawyer continued to hold her. That gives the judge the impression that she's a true mother to Belinda.”

In spite of herself, Emma flinched. When Belinda asked her what was wrong, Emma gave her a teasing answer that set the little girl to giggling. She saw Noah look back at the door again and again.

“Do you want to send Gladys or your brother to check?” she asked.

“No. That won't do any good, because they won't know whom to look for.”

“Who?”

He cursed quietly but vehemently when he looked over his shoulder again.

Emma shifted and saw a man coming through the door. At first, she had thought Noah's reaction was at Gilson's arrival. Then she realized she did not recognize this slight man who was wearing clothes that looked as if he had been sleeping in them for the past month.

“Who is that?” she asked.

He scowled. “A reporter from one of the Chicago newspapers. I recognize him. He always is after the most lurid stories he can find in order to sell more copies of his newspaper.”

Emma's next question went unasked when a door behind the judge's bench opened, and Judge Purchase entered. Rising, she stared at him. In his somber black robes, he barely resembled the jovial man who often came into the store just to talk and catch up on the news in Haven. His light brown hair was smoothed back, and he walked with a dignity that contrasted with the bounce that usually lightened his steps.

Motioning for them all to sit as he took his place, he looked about the courtroom. One brow arched, but he said nothing about the size of the crowd of spectators as he picked up a single piece of paper. Emma's arms tightened around Belinda as she recognized the bold handwriting through the paper. He held another copy of the order granting Gilson custody.

Judge Purchase lowered the page to the top of the table where he sat. “This appears to be in order.”

Mr. Evans came to his feet. “As you can see, your honor, that decision was made five years ago. There have been some changes in the circumstances of both Mr. Sawyer and Mr. Gilson since then. They have a bearing on this custody decision.”

“Is that so?” He folded his hands on the page. “Then we shall proceed. Mr. Evans, I would like to hear why you have brought a petition to have me send this back to a court in Illinois to be overturned.”

Only an occasional cough or rustle was heard in the courtroom as Mr. Evans outlined how Belinda had come to know Noah as her father. The little girl glanced with curiosity at Emma, but said nothing when Emma put her finger to her lips. There was more rustling and a few whispers when Mr. Evans mentioned how Gilson had been unable to pay his debts in recent months and seemed to owe money to unsavory people in businesses no one would deem lawful.

“During this time, your honor,” Mr. Evans concluded, “Mr. Sawyer has provided an excellent home for Miss Sawyer. He has recently married.”

“I'm quite aware of that,” Judge Purchase said before looking at Emma. “Mrs. Sawyer?”

“Yes, your honor?”

He motioned to a seat beside his table. Unsure why she was being asked to testify first, she handed Belinda to Noah and rose. She went forward and vowed to tell the truth in her testimony. She had to repeat the words so Judge Purchase could hear them, because the incoming train blasted its whistle just as she spoke. Sitting, she ignored the temptation to rock her feet like a scared and anxious child.

“Mrs. Sawyer,” the judge began with a kindly smile, “I believe we've known each other for nearly eight years now.”

“It is closer to seven, your honor. I bought the store here in Haven in the summer of 1869.”

“Ah, you're right. Will you be willing to answer a few questions?”

“Of course. I don't want Belinda to have to go with that man!”

Gilson's lawyer jumped up. “Your honor, she's slandering my client.”

“She's speaking her opinion, Mr. Jacobs,” the judge said. “You may sit down and listen while she answers my questions.”

Grumbling, the lawyer complied.

Judge Purchase turned to her and said, “Tell me about what you've observed of Miss Sawyer's relationship with Mr. Sawyer.”

“Noah—Mr. Sawyer—loves her very much, and Belinda loves him just as much. Shortly after I first met him, he brought a wounded puppy all the way from his farm for me to tend to in the middle of the night because he feared the puppy would die and Belinda would be heartbroken.”

“So he coddles her?”

“No more than any father would.” She looked to where Noah held Belinda. His face had not lost the intensity of the past week, but, for the first time in that time, she met his eyes steadily. Her breath caught as the powerful emotions within them surged all around her.

Could she trust them to be real? Could she trust herself to decide? Astonishment rushed through her as she realized it was not Noah she had been afraid of trusting, but herself. Trust in him had been easy, for she had seen how Belinda loved him and how Gladys respected him. Even when he had accused Sean of being a thief, he had been willing—however reluctantly—to listen to her. It had been when he asked her to listen to her heart and open it fully to him that she had let distrust and fear consume her again.

He was not Miles Cooper. He was Noah Sawyer, a strong-willed man who allowed no compromises for himself … or anyone around him. When she had turned away from him, too scared to trust that he was being honest with her, he had tried to reason with her. She had not listened to him as she had insisted he must listen to her. Only then had he turned away from her.

“Mrs. Sawyer?” Judge Purchase's voice drew her attention back to him.

“I'm sorry,” she said.

“I asked if you had ever seen any example of Mr. Sawyer being unsuitable as a parent to Miss Sawyer.”

“Never! He—”

Mr. Jacobs leaped to his feet again. “Your honor, are you really going to believe the testimony of a woman who was married to a bank robber?”

She closed her eyes as she heard the sharp intake of breaths all around the courtroom. Even though she had known this was coming, she had not found a way to prepare herself for the moment when everyone in Haven learned of her past.

“A bank robber?” asked Judge Purchase. “Are you sure you are speaking of
this
young lady?”

Mr. Jacobs held up a yellowed strip of newspaper. “This is the front page of the
Fort Pixton Gazette
, your honor. From Fort Pixton, Kansas. If I may ask the court's indulgence to allow me to read the first few lines …”

“Go ahead.” The judge looked at her, and she knew he was waiting for her to protest. How could she?

“‘Last night,'” Mr. Jacobs intoned, emoting as if he were on stage instead of in a courtroom, “‘the sheriff and his deputies discovered, after dispersing the crowd outside the house, that Mrs. Miles Cooper had escaped from custody before her trial on charges of being an accomplice to her husband's many robberies of banks in this county. Emma Cooper is being sought throughout Kansas. A description of her has been sent to sheriffs in this state and in Missouri. Anyone who sees a blonde woman with green eyes and who is nineteen years old should contact their local authorities at once.” He looked up. “I can read more if you would like, your honor.”