Christ.
I turn in a circle, checking out the bare, stained walls, the narrow bed, the few books on a shelf, the empty kitchen shelves. No curtains hang on the windows. Tyler’s apartment gives new meaning to cold and lifeless. Not a home at all, just a transit place.
My stomach clenches at the thought of him leaving again. I turn as Rafe helps Tyler to the bed. Asher stands at the apartment door, arms folded over his chest, his pale eyes distant as if lost in thought.
Rafe lifts Tyler’s booted feet up and drops them on the mattress. Tyler rolls over, groaning, and throws an arm over his face, muscles bulging under the soft fabric of his shirt. His black hair drapes over the white pillowcase like spun silk.
“I’m staying,” I say, a bit shocked when the words leave my mouth.
Rafe lifts a tawny brow and shrugs. “I think he’s gonna be fine.”
“I’m staying,” I say again, firmly this time.
Rafe exchanges a quick look with Asher. No need to be a genius to guess they’re wondering if I lost my mind.
Have I?
I’m probably about to put my heart through the shredder once again, but I can’t help it.
Asher tilts his spiky head at me. “Cool. We’ll talk another time. Come on, Rafe.”
Not looking forward to that discussion, now any more than before. Still, the change in Asher’s attitude toward his brother tells me he may yet forgive me, too.
I wait until they leave, closing the door behind them, before I go and lock it. Then I walk back to the bed, rubbing my arms. It’s freaking cold in here. I don’t see a single heater, and Tyler’s lying on top of the covers, still in his shirt, jeans and boots.
This is more complicated than I thought. Shocker, I know.
Sitting on the bed, I unzip his biker boots and pull them off his feet. They thump to the bare floor as I consider what to do next. Tyler hasn’t moved, and I don’t even know if he wants me to stay.
Well, I’ve come this far, so…
I stare at him lying there, his soft lips drawing my gaze. Rafe’s right: his cheekbones are sharper than before, his angular features even more pronounced. He’s been unwell.
I tug at the covers until I manage to free them and pull them over him. Still in my jacket, I unzip and pull my own tall boots off and lie down next to him, burrowing under the covers. He murmurs something, shifts and curls his arm around me, drawing me close. Heat radiates off his body.
“Erin…” His voice is low and rough and makes me shiver. “I remember this.”
This feeling, this entanglement of limbs and breathing each other’s air, this nearness that is so unbearably sweet.
“It’s not a memory,” I whisper as I snuggle closer and sleep claims me. “This is now.”
Tyler
I’m late for the movies. I don’t even know if Erin has gone in without me, or left. In her place, I’d have gone home. It’s cold and gray as I limp across the street to the movie theater.
This is turning into a pattern. Me, being late because of Dad’s vicious moods. Erin, waiting for me, or leaving, and generally being upset because I let her down.
I keep letting her down. And I can’t stop. I try and try to dodge Dad, but he’s drinking a lot more now, and when he corners me, there’s no way out. He’s a professional fighter who trained and worked with the best of them. There’s no chance in hell I can stand against him and win.
I keep skipping school and avoiding my friends. Even Ash.
Yeah.
Winning just doesn’t seem to be in the cards anymore.
When I finally get my sorry ass across the street, I see Erin waiting for me, wrapped up in her long coat. I tense. She must be angry, and I can’t blame her.
“Hey,” I say, jamming my hands into the pockets of my jacket and making a pitiful attempt to relax my shoulders.
“What happened to you?” She doesn’t seem angry, I belatedly realize, her eyes wide as she touches my jaw.
Ow.
Dammit, I didn’t realize I got a bruise there, too.
“And you’re limping.” Her small hand is warm and soft on my face, her gaze concerned. “Why didn’t you call to tell me you were hurt?”
“I’m okay,” I say and smile for her. “I just tripped and fell on my way here. I missed a step.”
“Come on,” she says and drags me with her, not into the movie theater, but in the direction of her house.
“What are you doing?”
“My parents aren’t home. We can lie on the sofa and watch something on the DVD player. And I can take care of you.”
My heart lighter, I follow her. And she really takes care of me, packing ice on my bruises and feeding me cake her Mom made. Then she kisses me and makes everything all right again.
She turns my world into a better place.
Tyler
There’s no oxygen. I’m pinned down—again. My breath catches, and I try to roll away, but that something holding my arm down isn’t letting me.
Light stabs at my eyeballs, and I blink. I can see. It’s not dark.
There’s a girl curled next to me, her small form fitting perfectly against me, her dark head resting on my shoulder. Her hand is splayed on my chest.
Then she lifts her face, her gold-flecked eyes staring right at me.
“Hey,” Erin says, her voice scratchy from sleep, and so sexy I feel myself harden instantly.
Hot damn.
“Hey.” I don’t know what to say. Don’t remember much from the previous night. I scramble for something. “You sleep okay?”
She smiles and it’s goddamn pretty. It makes me want to smile back. “Yeah. I thought I’d freeze, but you’re a regular space heater.”
“I double as foot warmer,” I say, and then snap my mouth shut. Since when do I crack jokes?
Erin snickers, and her warm breath tickles my arm. “I’ll bet you do. You also double as a pillow, apparently.”
“Comfy?”
“Very.”
She grins up at me, and my next quip dies in my throat as I think of how beautiful she is. Her shiny hair is loose, covering my arm and the pillow like a satin sheet. Her skin is like cream, and her mouth like a ripe strawberry. Suddenly I’m dying to taste it.
Her eyes widen when I dip my head but she doesn’t pull back. Instead, she tilts her chin up and lets her lips part.
I press my mouth to hers and slip my tongue inside. Sweetness floods my senses and I moan as my body tightens painfully. Automatically I gather her close. Closer. Can’t get close enough.
She draws back. Before I react, because I need to explore her mouth more, she reaches down and unzips her jacket.
Good idea. Great idea. Too many clothes. I help her get rid of the jacket and then work on her black pants. Helpfully, she wiggles out of them and toes them off the bed, then sits up, grabs the hem of her sweater and pulls it over her head.
I blink when she shakes that awesome hair and gives me a hot look. God, she’s even more beautiful than I remember. This girl’s made of honey and cinnamon, and her breasts… They’re straining under the flimsy lace of her bra, begging me to touch and kiss them.
“Tyler…” she whispers, and the sound of my name coming from her kiss-reddened lips goes straight to my cock.
I reach for her again, but she bends over me, undoing my fly and pushing down my jeans. Okay, I can work with that, and the sight of her head over my crotch sends jolts up my spine. I shove my pants down and pull my T-shirt over my head.
She sits back. She’s like a kitten with her pouty mouth, upturned little nose and that hair… Guess I have a hair fetish I didn’t know about. I run my fingers through her mane and it’s like water, cool and soft and prickly. Her mouth opens like she’s about to say something, and I grab a handful of hair and tug gently.
“Oh God,” she breathes as I wrap my other hand around her hip and position her right where I want her—on top of me. She settles on my cotton-clad erection, and my eyes close in bliss.
Then she rocks, a faint moan leaving her lips, and I almost shoot my load right then and there. My cock twitches and leaks, small bursts of pleasure that tighten my balls and make my back arch.
She puts her arms around my neck and pulls me down for a long and hot kiss, all tongue and teeth, that has me gasping and rocking back, trying to fuck her through the barrier of my already soaked briefs.
Dammit.
Only this girl can get me so desperate for her with just a kiss. But what a kiss.
Breathless and aching for her, I draw back, because this could be over before it even starts. Grabbing her hips, I shift her backward, off my dick, and clench my jaw not to whimper.
I glance down at my briefs. Yeah, all soaked. My dick tents them epically. You could house an army unit underneath.
Erin sucks in a sharp breath, and I realize she’s also looking down at me. I arch a brow—is she grossed out?—but then she traces the length of my cock with a dainty fingertip, all the way to the head, making me forget my own name.
“You like this?” She tilts her head to the side, and her chest heaves, her breasts rising and falling, drawing my gaze like twin magnets.
“Ugh,” I say intelligently and then gasp when she tugs on the elastic and peels my briefs down. My dick juts right up at her like a pointing finger — granted, a pretty big finger—and my breathing is so ragged I wonder if I’m going to have another attack.
Her eyes dip back to my cock, and it’s so fucking hot. Can you come from a gaze only? I swear I can feel it stroking me.
“Come here.” I place my hands on her ribs, feeling the frantic beating of her heart. Am I scaring her? It’s been so long since we were together we might as well be sharing a bed for the first time. “Are you okay?”
“Yeah.” She dips her chin, and I can see her nipples are hard, the tips straining inside the lace. She’s excited.
The thought arouses me even more, until I think I might just grab her and sink inside her tight heat right now.
But I hold back. I want to touch and taste. I want to make her come like never before. What we did in the bathroom and the office of Damage was just a prelude. What I need from her—what I really want—is so much more than that. I know it now.
I caress her arms, cup her shoulders and pull down the straps of her bra until her breasts spill out, lush and round. Fuck, she’s stunning. Her nipples are dark and react to my touch by hardening more.
She gasps my name when I bend to take one into my mouth, when I suck and lightly bite it. Even there she tastes sweet; her skin’s like cotton candy.
I switch to her other breast, my hands caressing her, reaching down to her black panties, and I cup her mound over the thin cloth. She’s wet, too; her panties are drenched, and I pull them off.
With a low growl, I release her nipple and put my hands on her narrow waist, lifting her off me. She makes a tiny protesting sound in her throat as I deposit her on the mattress and crawl over her until she’s lying on her back.
I can’t believe she’s here, in my bed. My heart bangs in my chest as I trail kisses down her neck, pausing to taste her breasts once more before moving down to her navel. In the gray light of dawn spearing through the windows, I can see faint white lines on her flat stomach. I wonder what caused them.
“Tyler.” Her soft voice makes me glance at her face as she sits up. “I need you.”
My dick twitches again. “How?”
“I need you inside me.”
Oh God.
And I need to be inside her so bad I can barely stop myself. “I have no condoms.”
“I’m on the pill,” she whispers.
Fuck yeah.
I haven’t been with anyone without using a condom since her, so I know I’m clean.
The darkness of her eyes sucks me in. Shadows pool between her breasts, and her legs tremble on either side of me. I stroke my hand down her side, to her thigh and then between her legs. I run my finger along her seam, and she moans as she opens up for me.
A grunt rises in my throat. I won’t last much longer. I free myself from my briefs and grab my dick, pressing the base hard not to come yet. I’m so fucking close.
I nudge at her entrance with my cock and she parts around me, letting me in. Soft, hot, velvety pressure, and I’m falling. I push deep and our moans echo off one another. I grab her legs and lift them higher, so I can press inside her all the way.
Then I pull out almost completely and slam back. Her cry bounces off the walls and she’s slick and scorching around my dick. Her legs lock around my waist.
“More,” she moans. “More.”
So I give it to her. I give in. I give her all I have. I bend over and ride her hard and fast. Reaching between us, I find her nub and stroke it until she convulses and cries out again, contracting around me like a vise.
I hiss as my balls lift and lightning shoots through me. I buck and rock as deep inside her as possible, the tsunami of pleasure rolling through me, breaking me, shattering me, until I find myself sprawled over her with no memory of how I ended up there.
I roll off, landing on my side, and I feel a hand on my arm, where her name is inked, then up on my chest where her pendant always hangs. She cups my cheek.
When I look up, she opens her arms. I let myself be pulled into them, and then it’s so easy to fall back into dreamless sleep once more.
***
Something’s tickling my nose, and a sneeze is building up. With a heartfelt groan—because I’m comfortable, warm and buried under thick layers of sleep—I roll my head and rub my nose with the back of my hand.
“Wake up, sleepyhead,” a soft feminine voice whispers close to my ear, and I jump at least an inch off the mattress, wrapped in the covers as I am.
Erin laughs at me, a tuft of her hair approaching my nose again, and I’m frozen in place as the pieces of last night come together with a soft crash.
The shop. Ash. The fight. The panic attack.
Erin. In my bed, in my arms, lying below me, naked and breathtaking.
I swallow hard.
Then her words finally register. “Sleepyhead?” I mutter incredulously. I haven’t slept a wink in weeks. What is she…?
“It’s eight. I need to go to class.”
Eight? Really? Whoa.
She pulls away, and I make a grab for her, not ready for this dream to be over so quickly. “Class?”