Ultimate Surrender: The Surrender Series, Book 2 (23 page)

“I’ve worked at this hospital going on thirty years and I tell you, I always think I’ve seen the strangest thing and then something else comes up. This one sure falls into that category.”

“What now?” Campbell asked.

Natalie stared at the nurse as if she held all the answers in the world.

“Honestly, until we get this straightened out it’s up to you. The baby needs immediate foster placement since she was cleared to be discharged yesterday. You’re listed as next of kin and guardian, so Starling can go home with you. Normally we’d do all sorts of background checks in this situation, but Detective Wyatt has vouched for you and I’ve known him going on ten years. If you have his stamp of approval then you’re good.”

“Well, I’m not really a relation, but I’m an approved foster parent so I can absolutely take Starling. The idea of walking out of the hospital and her not being with me makes me want to vomit.” She glanced at the baby and her stomach dropped. With her heart in her throat she turned to Campbell. “Oh God. We can’t.”

His eyebrows pulled low into a V. “Why not?”

“I completely forgot to file the paperwork for you to be approved. I didn’t even put through my change of status. It would be completely illegal for us to—”

He kissed her, and then kissed her forehead. “I did all of it. Breathe. I was supposed to be approved last week.”

A breath whooshed out of her and it felt like she’d gotten punched in the stomach. But a good kind. Sorta. Her eyes welled up again and Campbell kissed her once more.

He turned to Becky. “Can you pull it up in your system? Make sure everything is ready on that end? Campbell Newbury.” He spelled it for her and then gave her his birthdate and the last four of his social security number.

“Of course.”

A door opened to their left and all of them glanced that way. Another nurse in purple scrubs appeared, carrying Starling.

Butterflies fluttered inside Natalie’s stomach as the woman approached. She barely heard Becky say something about leaving to go check the foster records for the state. Something else about getting better acquainted.

All Natalie could see was the tiny infant wrapped in pink with her little yellow hat on.

“Would you like to hold her?” the nurse asked.

Doubt crept inside and wouldn’t let go. Without taking her eyes from the wiggling baby she addressed Campbell. “I can’t touch her. Can’t hold her. Not if I don’t get to take her home. Not if I have to give her back. How sure are you the approval is in place?”

“Ninety-nine percent.”

“But…”

He rubbed her back, nodded.

Not having to explain herself anymore in the moment was priceless, but the thought of the nurse putting Starling back in her little basket made her stomach hurt too.

Campbell fixed it. Just like he fixed everything else. “Why don’t I hold her until we get the all-clear and then she’s all yours?”

She closed her eyes and said a little prayer. The words she used were gone as soon as she thought them, but the emotion behind them lingered. They were of humble thankfulness for the man standing with her along with the hope for a guiding hand in the coming days and weeks.

As she lifted her eyelids, Campbell was there, staring at her.

Starling let out a little cry and they both turned to face her.

The nurse held her out and laid her in Campbell’s arms. “I’ll let you guys say hello and I’ll be right in there if you need me.” She pointed somewhere Natalie didn’t see because nothing existed in that moment except the baby girl and the man holding her.

Starling wiggled as he held her close and rocked her back and forth.

In awe.

That’s what Natalie was.

Completely in awe of the man she’d come to depend on.

“Hi, pretty girl.” Campbell smiled down at her.

She wiggled enough to get one of her tiny fists out of her blanket and before Natalie thought better of it she reached forward to touch the tiny back of her hand with her thumb.

The baby wrapped her hand around one of Natalie’s fingers and that was it.

Natalie was a goner.

Her heart beat different in her chest, and her entire system seemed to rotate several degrees off her normal access.

Love at first sight had only happened to her one other time. A greeting long, long ago when she was nothing but a girl and a first hello turned into goodbye before she was ready for it.

Becky walked toward them and Natalie faced her, placing her body between herself and the little girl she’d already fight for.

The move wasn’t lost on Becky as she glanced at her change in position and then smiled. “Mama-bear already, I see. I like that.” She looked up at Campbell. “Mr. Newbury, you’re completely approved as is your change in status, Ms. Grant.”

Natalie actually jumped up and down a couple times before she leaned forward, grabbing Campbell by the back of the neck so she could kiss him. “You’re my hero.”

“Ditto,” he told her as he repositioned Starling and then handed her over.

There was nothing like the feeling of the first time holding a new baby. The fact they didn’t weigh very much, how fragile they were, but also how strong.

The way they smelled of baby powder and milk. How they blinked up at the person holding them and just stared.

The weight of the responsibility Natalie and Campbell were taking on wrapped around Natalie and made her warm.

Interesting how it felt a lot like love.

Natalie stared at the little girl, and her heart ached for her never getting to know her mother. Or her older sister. Or her father.

“I’ll take care of the funeral arrangements for Hazel and Wren. And the husband. Just let me know when I’m cleared to do that.”

Becky seemed taken aback. “Why would you do that if you weren’t really related?”

Natalie stared at Starling, who was falling asleep, her little mouth open. “Because it’s the right thing to do.”

“Wren and Hazel were both in the organ donation system. The husband wasn’t though. So you can start the process as soon as you’re ready.” Becky smiled and nodded at the sleeping baby in Natalie’s arms. “I’m pretty sure you’re going to have your hands full.”

Natalie took a deep breath, drawing Starling a little closer. “Yes…we will.” She looked up at Campbell who glanced at her and back to the baby again. “What was her father’s name again?”

“Jonathon Grouse.” Becky looked at her watch and yawned. “Long shift but a happy ending. I can handle that.” She looked through the glass and nodded. “Angelique will bring the rest of Starling’s things out in just a second.” She glanced down the hall again and back to Natalie. “Detective Wyatt went to run an errand real quick and he’s supposed to be back any minute.”

“Do we need to wait for him?”

“Yes.” Becky smiled again. Looked like she knew something else she wasn’t saying. “And all of the paperwork is ready for Starling’s discharge at the nurse’s station. We’ll get you home in just enough time for the sun to rise.”

Natalie yawned, the day and night and early morning finally catching up with her. “Campbell. We have to get a car seat. We can’t leave the hospital without one.” The logistics of it ran through her tired brain. One of them would have to leave to get the car seat, come back, get out of here, get essentials for the night, and finally get back home.

She glanced up at Campbell as he looked down the hallway. His grin drew her attention.

Wyatt was walking down the hall.

Carrying a black and pink car seat.

Natalie almost lost it but held it together, swallowing frantically and blinking. Keeping the tears at bay took all of her concentration.

Wyatt’s smile sealed the deal on him being one of the best people in New York. Hands down one of the best detectives and someone she would most definitely call a friend.

“Thought you might need a seat to get your new little munchkin home.”

The next bit happened quickly. The nurse came out and handed Campbell the sack with extra diapers and some formula. She told them they had nothing but normal newborn things to deal with. Starling was healthy and doing great.

They moved to the nurse’s station and signed Starling’s release papers.

Natalie had to sign next to Wren’s name since she’d already signed them. It made her shiver as they walked toward the exit.

She hugged Becky before she walked away and then she faced Wyatt as he handed over the car seat to Campbell.

“You didn’t have to say this was okay.”

Wyatt looked at her and asked, “What do you mean?”

She moved a little bit closer. “You know what I’m talking about. The attacks. The emails. You could have put the kibosh on all of this. You could have insisted she be placed with someone else.”

Deadpan face. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” He looked at Starling. “And she needs a mom.”

A tear ran down Natalie’s cheek and she brushed it away.

Wyatt nodded. “And it looks like I chose wisely. Cab’s out front waiting for you guys. Need anything else before I get back to the mountains of paperwork about to eat my desk?”

“Thank you, Wyatt. I can’t say thank you enough.”

He shrugged. “I didn’t do anything. Just removed a bit of red tape, that’s all.”

“That’s not all you did.”

He shrugged again and winked at her. “I’ll hit you up for the Policemen’s Ball.” He saluted them both with two fingers and went back into the labyrinth of the hospital corridors. What to do she didn’t know, but she was immensely humbled by his help.

“Let’s get our new cargo ready to go.”

Natalie looked down at Campbell and handed over the tiny girl. He unwrapped her blanket and got her snug in her car seat. With her blanket tucked all around her, they exited the hospital directly into the cab waiting for them outside.

They stopped at an all-night Duane Reade pharmacy to pick up a few baby essentials that she didn’t already have at the house.

The dogs met them as soon as they walked in the door. Campbell set Starling down in the carrier and let the dogs smell her. He petted both dogs and told them they had a new sister to watch out for. As he lifted the still-sleeping infant from the carrier, she rubbed her face and let out a cry.

The dogs’ ears perked up and they ran around as if they wanted to help.

He handed the baby to Natalie who grabbed the bag from the hospital and headed into the nursery.

She changed Starling’s diaper and turned on the wipe warmer. The dogs at her feet stood up on their hind legs to try to see her. Natalie yawned and put Starling back in a little onesie outfit.

Without having asked him, Campbell brought in a bottle with a few ounces in it with the new sensitive tummy formula they’d picked up at the store.

Starling had been breast-fed for the first couple days so her system was probably going to have a bit of a rough time adjusting to formula. Natalie wanted to make it as easy on her as possible.

“You okay if I bring the bassinet into the bedroom? I don’t know about you but I’m freaking beat. A bit of shut-eye after you feed her sounds like music to my ears.”

She nodded and tried to smile as she sat in the rocking chair in the corner with a hungry newborn and the dogs still trying to get another look at her.

The tears started to fall as soon as his back was turned.

It felt like a family. She shut it out as long as she possibly could, but she was too tired to be strong.

As if she needed one more thing to remind her this wasn’t a forever situation it was Campbell being amazing one more time and showing her he knew what she needed before she had to say a word.

A family.

A real family.

One that loved each other and needed each other and relied on each other for everything large and small. That was what she’d wanted and ached for, for as long as she could remember.

“Oh, Natalie, why didn’t you tell me you needed me?” He walked in the room and the tears fell even harder. He didn’t shy away from her or rebuke her or scold her for her show of emotion.

Just the opposite.

He scooped her up out of the rocking chair, sat down, and held her and the baby in his lap.

Tucking her face into the side of his neck, she broke down and cried for everything she’d ever had to give away in the name of family.

Chapter Twenty-One

Natalie

The cries of a newborn baby woke Natalie out of a deep sleep.

Campbell rolled over beside her and a flash of lightning drew her attention outside.

Night time?

Morning time?

Completely disoriented by the odd sleep and darkness, she struggled to sit up as thunder crashed outside.

Starling cried louder and Natalie had that familiar ache in her chest when she heard a baby cry.

Did her son cry like that when he was little?

Were the people who adopted him good people? Did they cuddle him close? Sing to him when he was scared? Check under his bed for monsters?

She pulled the t-shirt down to cover her ass when she got out of bed and blinked her eyes to clear the fog from her head. Sleeplessness or nostalgia she didn’t know. Probably a bit of both.

Campbell growled and Natalie held her breath halfway to the bassinet, which wasn’t that far away from her side of the bed.

This was it. His congenial nature was probably done with and after already being awoken once before…or was it twice? He was going to freak out being woken up again. ’Cause that’s what all guys did. Not Clay. But all the rest.

Campbell would be an asshole and she’d break down into a fit of tears since she still hadn’t been able to shove her emotions back in their cage yet.

He was out of bed and met her in the middle of the floor.

Scooping her up, he deposited her back on the bed. “What did I tell you last time when you got up?”

“Uhh.”

“Nope, that wasn’t it. Well, at least not all of it. I told you we were going to take turns getting her so we can both get some sleep.” He stretched hugely and then turned to pick up a wailing little girl. “You got up last time so this one is my turn.”

“You really said that? I thought I was dreaming.”

He came back over and kissed her nose. “I like the idea of you dreaming of me. Keep that thought in your head. Let me go change her and get some formula. You try to go back to sleep.”

“But—”

“No buts.” And then he was gone. She could hear him shushing Starling and talking to her while he changed her. “So wet. No wonder you were unhappy. You totally have some good lungs on you. Maybe you’ll be in a band when you grow up.”

Natalie half sort of fell over in bed.

Maybe she was dreaming now.

That made more sense.

Starling probably hadn’t woken her up at all and Campbell had to be snoring beside her, even though he didn’t snore.

Seemed as if two seconds after she closed her eyes Campbell walked back in with a fussy baby as he shook the bottle to mix up the formula. “I know you’re in a hurry but we have to make sure it’s all ready for you. Upset tummies are shitty.” He snickered. “Literally.” As he stepped in front of the window, another bolt of lightning illuminated him. He was shirtless with some kind of pajama pants on. One arm holding the baby, the other arm she couldn’t see was more than likely feeding her if the sucking noises were any indication. “There you go.” He gently moved back and forth and stared at the baby. “Now let’s talk about thunderstorms.”

A rumble of thunder punctuated his sentence, and he started telling the infant girl about a time when he was little and got scared by a storm.

Natalie listened with rapt attention to how his dad came in and told him that God was bowling and it was nothing to be afraid of.

“Boy, you sucked down that bottle. Growing girl.”

He rinsed out the bottle in their bathroom and when he came out of the open doorway he had a burp cloth on his shoulder, and little Starling propped up on it as he patted her back.

A huge belch broke the silence and they both laughed.

“Great job,” he praised.

Dumbfounded didn’t even touch the surface of how impressed she was with Campbell.

“Like riding a bike,” he told her as he stood by the end of the bed holding Starling.

It took Natalie a second to stop staring at him to form any kind of intelligent statement. “How much younger is your sister than you?”

“Twelve years. I was completely enamored with her when she came into the world. I wanted to do everything with my mom. Learn it all. No clue why but I just loved her from the moment she came out.”

“And your mom taught you how to take care of her?”

Campbell yawned and switched Starling to his other arm and walked over to the bassinet to grab a pacifier they’d found in the hospital bag. Getting her to take it proved a bit difficult, and she kept shaking her head as if she were trying to latch on.

A pang of sadness hit Natalie and she sent up a prayer.

“Yep. How to feed her, burp her, hold her, bathe her. Everything. Totally like riding a bike. Starling is a lot smaller then I remember my sister though.”

“What’s her name?”

Campbell looked over at her while he held the paci in for Starling. “Danielle.”

“And you said you had a brother too?”

“Uh huh. He was a couple years older than me. Branson.”

“Really?”

“Yes. Why?”

She pulled the covers over herself, a rush of coldness made her shiver. “Branson, Campbell, Danielle? That seems like a plan was in place for something.”

“My mom’s name is Ariel, which was before the kids’ movies made the name famous. And my dad’s name is Edward before the vampire movies made that name famous. When they got married they decided to see how many letters of the alphabet they could fill in. They got A through E and then that was it.” He chuckled and then spoke in a whisper when he realized Starling was asleep in his arms. “They’re already hounding my brother when he’s going to have a baby and what F name he’s going to pick to carry on the family tradition.”

“That’s so sweet,” Natalie told him as he put Starling back in her bassinet.

She fussed for a couple seconds when he let her go but he covered her up with another soft blanket Natalie had already and she fell back asleep.

Campbell crawled over her, drawing her with him as he settled on his back. “She’s a tiny little thing.”

Natalie pushed herself up on one elbow and stared down at him.

“What?”

“You’re…incredible.”

He made a face. “No I’m not.”

She held his face and kissed him softly. “I believe you might need a bit of help taking a compliment. Perhaps an incentive is in order.” Up on her knees, she stripped off her t-shirt and tossed it toward the end of the bed then she wiggled down beneath the covers until her face was even with Campbell’s waist.

Moving her hand up his leg, she didn’t stopped until she found his cock.

“What are you doing?”

“I think I’d like to show you instead of telling you.” She lifted the waist of his pants over his erection and he tilted his hips so she could pull the material down his legs. “Especially since we have to be quiet.” She whispered the last part against his shaft and then licked him.

He kicked his pants off the rest of the way and relaxed against the mattress. “I thought I was tired.”

Circling her tongue around the head of his dick, she squeezed him. After a couple of bobs over the head and crown she licked him again. “And now?”

“Come here.”

Going against
that
voice wasn’t something she could do. As she crawled up beside him, he pulled her the rest of the way until she straddled him.

Reaching between them, he grabbed his dick and stood it up.

She put her hands on his shoulders and moved until her pussy was over his cock. As she eased herself down, he held her hips and let her take him at her pace.

She was in control but it didn’t feel like that as she stared down at him. It was still dark but not dark enough to hide from him.

How vulnerable she felt above him, on top of him, as she fucked herself onto his shaft struck her as ironic.

“You’re so beautiful.” Grabbing her behind the neck, he lowered her down to his mouth before she had a chance to answer.

Her nipples brushed his chest and she moaned as he kissed her mouth. Nibbling her lips, he thrust into her slick pussy. So wet for him. Always so wet for him. She’d never been that way with other lovers before, and it still took her by surprise now.

He pulled her up and off his cock.

She expected him to flip her around so he could mount her from behind. Fuck her hard and fast so they could both come and get back to sleep.

He did flip her around, but he laid her down on her side facing away from him. He tucked her into the cocoon of his body and raised her top leg, exposing her slit. “Hold your leg.”

Grabbing her leg behind the knee, she held herself open to him. Tucking his pelvis in close to hers, he lined his cock up to her opening again and pushed back inside. Then he settled her leg down on her other thigh and wrapped her up close in his arms.

No covers, but she didn’t need them. His warmth always kept her cozy.

He held on to her breasts, caressing them, soothing them. Soothing her.

“We’ve never done this before,” he whispered.

She used one hand to hold on to his forearm, reaching back with her other hand to touch his thigh as he wrapped his leg around her.

“This?” she asked, trying to joke her way out of owning her emotions. She’d had quite enough of them lately. “I think we’ve had sex a few times before.”

He kissed her neck. Her shoulder. “Not like this. This is very different.”

Something in his voice caught her off guard. She closed her eyes. “It is?”

“Can’t you feel it?”

She could. No question about it. But saying yes felt like a giant leap for them. For her.

“Be brave for me.”

She swallowed and he held her tighter. Holding her close or holding her together because he knew she needed it, she wasn’t sure. “Yes. I can feel it.”

“Good girl.” He kissed her shoulder again and moved inside her, bringing her closer and closer to coming on him. “Because you deserve it.”

“Deserve what?” she asked and then bit her lip, not certain she really wanted to know the answer.

One of his hands moved down her body. He lifted her top leg over his, which opened her sex to him. His fingers slid between her thighs and he gathered her wetness to spread around her clit. Her fingers dug into his skin, the rush of sensation almost more than she could process.

“Everything.”

She sucked in a sharp breath as he circled her clit. Pleasure raced to her clit and the walls of her pussy went even slicker as he fucked her.

Fucking her. That really didn’t feel like what he was doing right now.

Having sex had never felt like this. Not with Campbell and certainly not with the few people she’d had sex with before him. That had been nothing but a race to come so they could part ways again and get back to living their separate lives.

This was quiet and sweet and emotional.

This moment in time meant something, and Natalie didn’t want it to simply pass by. She didn’t want Campbell to be hanging out on the limb by himself. She slowly climbed out there with him and held on tight, hoping it didn’t break beneath their combined weight. “Everything?” She shook her head. “One word and you make me feel more special than I ever have in my whole life. Cared for.” Emotion made her nose tingle and her head feel heavy. As if he knew, he held her tighter and rubbed her clit.

Loved.

That’s the one she wanted to say but it got trapped in her throat as she started to come.

Rolling her over onto her stomach, he moved inside her and held her tight. She wrapped her mouth around his arm and bit him. Not hard. Not deep. Barely anything but she wanted her mark on him no matter how quickly it faded.

She lit up with him. As if he were made from light she seemed to absorb from him. She bit him a tiny bit harder as he groaned in her ear. The first jerk of his cock inside her made her moan and tip her pelvis up so he could get closer.

They came together.

It wasn’t frantic and harsh, which it had always been before.

This was different.

Scary and perfect and terrifying and complete.

She wanted to say something but her body said it for her. She gave him what he needed. At least she hoped she did. As he relaxed against her and moved them back to their sides, he stayed inside her and she twitched beside him.

“Sleep, you little biter.” He definitely didn’t sound displeased by her nibble.

“You came inside me. With no condom.”

“Should I apologize for that?”

“Not if you want to keep your balls.”

“Love it when you get feisty.”

Smiling, she relaxed against him, already close to sleep.

He kissed her hair and she thought of the baby asleep on the other side of the room.

For an instant it felt like they were more than temporary. It felt as if they were a real couple. Her heart already slid along a very slick slope with nothing but darkness at the bottom. She wanted to believe something else could come of it, but that just wasn’t how real life worked.

What would happen when Campbell discovered who was after her? How quickly would he be gone?

Drifting off to sleep, she tried to push the worry from her head.

Real life was no fairytale, and she needed to remember that.