Undeniable (3 page)

Chapter Four

Jude

I didn’t expect Callie to still be there. In fact, Jett had assured me she would be gone. So seeing her walk out of my bedroom, wearing what looked like a pair of baggy pajama pants and a tiny, tight shirt, made my heart thump hard. She carried a bag over her shoulder as she entered the living room, and I stood there staring at her, barely noticing Zoey and Matthew jumping around at my sides.

Callie made sure to avoid eye contact as the kids and even my sister continued to praise her. She did everything possible to keep her back or side to me until I took a chance and interrupted the bonding moment she and my sister were sharing. The second her eyes met mine, my stomach tightened. She was fucking beautiful, but I couldn’t allow her to see the effect she had on me. I had wanted to keep my life and troubles isolated from everyone, especially her. The idea of Callie seeing this side of me made me feel weak, and that was something I could not allow.

“Do you need help carrying your things out, Cal?” Jett offered, breaking the tension in the room.

When I looked back at Callie, she was once again averting her eyes. “No, I, uh…” She cleared her throat. “I only have the one bag.”

“You’re leaving?” The sadness in Zoey’s voice hit me hard. “But you said we would have a movie night.”

I watched as Callie lowered her bag and knelt in front of my niece. “I promise you that one day, we’ll have a movie night. But your uncle is home now, and it’s time for me to go back home too.”

“But I thought you liked it here with us.” Zoey’s lower lip quivered, and fuck if it didn’t feel like I had just been punched in the stomach. This was one of the biggest reasons I didn’t want anyone intertwined in our lives. These kids had lost enough, and now they had grown attached to Callie, and it could only end badly.

“Callie, why don’t you leave me your number? Then we can set up something,” Kate said, and I looked at her as if she had lost her damn mind.

“I have her number,” I said, and when Kate glared at me, I knew I must have sounded like an ass.

“Well, that’s great. Now we’ll both have her number.” She arched an eyebrow, daring me to argue.

Catching movement out of the corner of my eye, I looked once more in Callie’s direction. Her eyes were locked on mine, and she was just staring at me blankly. Matthew appeared at my side and yanked on my pant leg, breaking the hold her eyes had on me.

“What is it, buddy?” I asked.

“Why don’t you like our Callie?”

I felt like my throat was closing up and my stomach had fallen to the floor. All eyes were now on me, and I could feel the tension in the room.

Before I could argue or even attempt to convince him otherwise, Quinn rushed forward and passed a piece of paper to Kate. “There’s Callie’s number. I’m sure she would love to see you and the kids anytime.” She then turned and bent down to pick up Callie’s bag without looking at me.

The two women walked toward the front door as Jett held it open. “Thank you for staying with them,” I said to Callie as she passed me. She just nodded and continued out the door. I didn’t like that she now knew the type of life I led outside of Jett’s, but I couldn’t do anything about that now.

“You need anything, any of you, you’ll call, right?” Jett said as he gave my shoulder a light squeeze.

“Yeah,” I said in return. “I’ll call.”

As if feeling like shit for the way things had just unfolded with Callie wasn’t enough, when I turned to face Katelynn, I knew the ache I was feeling was nothing compared to what she was about to inflict on me.

I shut the door behind Jett and walked toward the couch, still feeling sore and exhausted. Once I was sitting across from her, I braced myself for the lecture I knew was coming. “Let me have it.”

She glared at me, and I just smiled. “Zoey, will you take Matthew to your room and entertain him?”

“But Mom,” Zoey whined. “He’s so mean, and he’ll just tear up my things.”

That reminded me of the doll I’d got her. “Hey, sweetheart, look in my bag by the door. There’s something in there for you.”

Her eyes lit up with excitement, and she scurried off. A few seconds later, a loud, shrill squeal ripped through her, and she ran back to me and hugged me. “Thank you.”

“To replace the one that lost the battle with the permanent marker,” I told her. “Sorry I didn’t get it to you sooner.”

“That’s okay, but now we have to replace Barbie. Matthew fed her head to Warrior,” she said as she glared over at her little brother. He shrugged as if he had no clue what she was referring to.

“Boy, what have I told you about flushing things down the toilet?” I don’t know how many damn times I’ve had to snake things out of it because of him. On one occasion, we had to rip it up to take out the things he’d flushed.

“But I like to hear him growl,” he said, following it up with his best imitation of the toilet.

“Room,” I said, and he hurried off, followed by a very happy Zoey. Damn, that smile of hers could always make me feel better. That was until I turned back around to face my sister.

“What?” I asked.

“You’re an asshole,” she stated firmly. “And I can’t believe how ungrateful you are.”

“I’m ungrateful?” I chuckled. “Mind explaining?”

“The way you just acted toward Callie. That was uncalled for. What kind of thanks was that for taking care of your family while you were laid up in the hospital?” Her stare was downright hateful. “She stayed here every night and day. Even when the others tried to relieve her, she refused to leave. She cooked, cleaned, and not once did she do any of it without a big smile on her face.”

“But—”

Kate held up her hand. “I’m not done.” She lowered it as she continued, “She did therapy with me each day, twice a day. She may not have known at first what to do, but each day she got better. During this last week, I’ve felt amazing. I know my health is only going to get worse, but having her around…God, for the first time in so long, things just felt light and cheerful. And then you walk in here and act like the biggest ass.”

“I don’t like people in my business, Katelynn. You know this.”

“Well, I don’t give a damn. I do have a say about who is in my children’s lives. It’s not that I don’t greatly appreciate everything you’ve done for us, Jude. Without you, I’m not sure what would have happened. You have sacrificed so much for the three of us, and I will be forever grateful. But, damn it, you have got to stop pushing people away for fear of us getting hurt.”

Her eyes shimmered with unshed tears. “You’re only hurting yourself in the end. That girl cares about you. Anyone can see that. So open your eyes and give life a chance. If you don’t, one day you’ll wake up and wonder where all your time went, why you let all those chances pass you by. But then it will all be too late, because life does go on, Jude, even if you don’t want it to, and those opportunities you had will be forever lost.”

I knew she wasn’t just talking about me here, but herself. We all knew her prognosis. She was only growing weaker with each day, and her last round of radiation had done nothing but make her weaker still.

“I’ll apologize to her,” I said as I wrapped my fingers over hers.

“It’s gonna take a whole lot more than a simple sorry,” she whispered.

I knew she was right.

After I put Kate into bed for her afternoon nap, I made my way down the hall to my room. The moment my bed came in to view, I felt my body relax. Hospitals are supposed to be the place you recover, but there was nothing like your own bed. I lowered my exhausted body to the mattress, lounged back against the pillows, and took in a deep breath. As Callie’s flowery scent engulfed me, I groaned in frustration. I had a feeling I wouldn’t be sleeping much tonight.

Chapter Five

Callie

“Hello,” I hollered as I walked through the front door of my parents’ house. “Anyone home?”

“In here, honey,” my mother said.

I could smell greatness as I walked toward the kitchen. My mother was an amazing cook. I always thought she and Jude would be unstoppable if they teamed up in the kitchen at the restaurant, but my Mom would never consider cooking a job. She says she loves to bake for joy and smiles, and to help people. In fact, she spends ninety percent of her time volunteering at homeless shelters and hospitals.

“Something smells good,” I said as I placed my bag on a barstool and walked around the counter. Stepping up to her side, I bumped hips with her, and she smiled brightly. “You have a million things going on in here. Do you need some help?”

“Well, I have to frost the cupcakes and place them in those containers over there. Then I want to get the pans of lasagna in the oven.” She had five dishes of it set out along the back counter, and she was layering the sixth as we spoke.

“Where is all this food going?” I asked, spotting the three large containers of cookies on the kitchen table.

“Three different places.” She began counting them off. “I have Ms. Henry down the road. She had a hip replacement done, and I know she can’t get around well. So I’m making her dinner. Plus, I have to drop off three of these servings to Hope and Dreams.” Hope and Dreams is the women’s shelter my mother feeds on a regular basis. “And I made that large pan over there, plus one container of cookies and cupcakes for you to take to your friend’s house. Oh yeah, and there is a freshly made salad with two different types of dressing in the fridge too.”

My heart started hammering in my chest. “Mom…” I shook my head, and she stopped me with just one look. My mother had always been more like a best friend than a parent, and I had shared my feelings for Jude with her on more than one occasion. She also knew how difficult and intimidating Jude Calvert was.

“Callie, I expect you to deliver this food to those kids and Katelynn. You have developed a bond with them that you shouldn’t let him break. It’s not fair to those kids.” She had dried her hands and was now facing me. “There’s more to that man than he allows anyone to see. I think you’ve all figured that out. But do you think that maybe he pushes people away because he feels like no one fights for them, or for him?” She tipped my chin upward and locked eyes with me. “Sweetheart, I’m not saying to allow him to be mean or hurtful toward you. Because that wouldn’t be fair to you. But what I am saying is don’t give up so easily. Something is telling me that he just needs a little push. He needs to know someone cares enough to stick it out.”

“I do care. I just don’t know how to show him,” I whispered as I fought against the flood of emotions running through me.

“Just don’t give up so easily,” she reiterated. “You have that fight in you, and I know you just need to make him see it too.”

***

Sitting in front of Jude’s apartment in my car, I continued trying to talk myself through my nerves. I was on the verge of a panic attack and had fought the urge to leave more than twice.

It had been three days since I left feeling like an idiot for thinking Jude and I could ever have a relationship. Now here I was with a car full of food my mother had insisted I bring them. It would be just my luck if he slammed the door in my face the moment he saw me.

My phone chirped, and I dug through my bag to get it. Lifting it up, I could see the message was from my pushy yet loving mother.

Mom: Stop stalling and knock on his door.

At times it was almost freaky just how well she understood me and how my mind worked.

After typing out a quick response, I threw the phone in my purse, got out of the car, and opened the back door. I hooked the bag with the salad and dressings over my shoulder before lifting the other containers from the seat.

I was glad I had decided to wear flats because heels on this uneven sidewalk would not have been my best choice, especially when I was overloaded with enough food to feed a small army. Stepping up to the door, I balanced the containers in one arm and tapped the buzzer next to the door with my fingertip. The large Rubbermaid holding the cupcakes wobbled on top of the pile, and I cringed as I pictured them falling.

The front door came open just as they slid forward, and I squeezed my eyes shut tightly, waiting for the sound of the container as it collided with the ground.

“I saved ’em. You’re okay to look.” Jude’s gruff voice had my eyes shooting open. There he stood, shirtless, holding the container in his hand.

Heat rose in my neck and settled in my cheeks. “Thanks,” I offered with a timid smile.

“What’s all this?” he asked as he scanned over the dishes I still balanced in my hands.

“Dinner.” I shrugged. “My mom made enough to feed half the neighborhood, and she wanted me to bring all this over to you and your family. She made cupcakes for the kids, oh, and cookies.” I knew I was rambling, but my nerves were truly on edge.

He stared at me with an unreadable look, and I could feel the hairs on the back of my neck standing. Why the hell he made me feel so small was something I would never know. Wanting to impress someone so much yet feeling as if that was impossible was not a fun feeling.

“Here,” I said as I nervously thrust the pile of food into his arms. I then held out the bag for him to take as well. The analyzing look he was giving me only made my nerves worse. I looked down toward his chest, thinking maybe I could slow down my racing heart. Then I knew that was a mistake. I don’t often get the chance to see Jude without a shirt on, so when I scanned over his muscles and rippled abs, a whole new set of unneeded feelings washed over me.

“We don’t need anyone’s charity. I can feed my family,” he said, and it was like a cold pitcher of water on my heated body. I lifted my head, and our eyes met once more.

I was usually calm and able to hold myself together, but his words made any chance of this being a nice evening vanish.

“Are you serious right now?” I asked, angry at how he’d made a thoughtful gesture from my mother feel dirty. “You really are an asshole. This wasn’t charity, you dick. If you don’t want it, don’t eat it. But you could at least give it to the three beautiful people inside. Because they’re the only reasons I tolerate your fucking attitude. If it wasn’t for them, you’d be wearing that lasagna right now.”

I spun around and stalked off toward my car. Tears were burning my eyes, and the last thing I wanted was for that ass to know he’d gotten to me. He didn’t deserve the satisfaction.

“Callie, wait,” he called after me, and it only infuriated me more.

“Go to hell, Jude.” I yanked open my car door and got inside before the tears fell. As I backed away, he was still standing in the doorway of his apartment holding the dishes. Only now Matthew and Zoey stood at his sides, and seeing them only made my heart break even more as I drove away.