Underneath It All (27 page)

Chapter XXX

Things Changed

Another day passed that I did not see him. I missed Reeve so damn much. How long had it been since I heard from him? Five days? A week? I was staying at my parents’ house so my friends and I could continue avoiding each other.

I wanted to talk to him and fix things but I wanted him to reach out first. We’d obviously gone out of our way to avoid each other.

My eyes kept darting at my phone while I was trying to help my brother get the guest room ready and converted into a nursery for the arrival of his baby. That day we were painting the room. Rogue was now six months pregnant and she was more than ready for the arrival of baby Miguel.

Since I kept getting distracted, I didn’t get much work done at all.

“Agata, are you okay?” Mik asked.

“Yes, yes. I’m all right.” I was doing just well enough to classify as “all right.” His eyes caught mine and I gave him a weak smile but he saw right through me, as usual.

“Good,” he said with a forced smile looking at me hard, scanning my face up and down. “When did you talk to him last?”

“Last week,” I sighed. “We had a fight last week and I stormed off and we haven’t talked since then.”

“Maybe it’s time to bend the rules and swallow your pride.” Mik stopped painting and cradled my face. “It is better to lose your pride with someone you love rather than to lose that someone to your useless pride, sister.”

I clenched my teeth, silencing my own cry. “Maybe he’s with someone else right now, and that’s why I didn’t even cross his mind. Someone who will agree with all his decisions, someone who will take all his bullshit…someone who will give him a bab—”

Mik held up his hand to cut me off. He grabbed my shoulders and looked down at my face. “Agata, he is not with another woman as so many woman like you seem to want to believe is always the case. He is hurting over you. He, without a doubt, misses you too, but he is angry, because you crossed a serious line. He is hurting because you both crossed that line. His pride is already damaged, yet somehow, under those circumstances, you would expect him to come back begging for you? Come on, we men are not superhuman.”

“Look who’s talking,” I raised an eyebrow. “Months ago you made it clear that you don’t like him for me and now you’re defending him? Whose side are you on, twin brother?”

“No one’s. I’m not taking sides.” Mik grabbed the paintbrush from my hand and sat me down on the floor with him. “Agata, you have said or done something that made him think you don’t love him. So quit depending on the archaic belief that as a female you should wait and the man has to want you enough to chase you every time.”

“Or maybe it’s time for me to move on just like what he’s doing right now.” A quiet sob slipped through my gritted teeth; I could no longer suppress it.

“What happens when you still love him, and know that you are never going to get over him, despite the terrible things you and he have said and done? Think about it, Agata.”

I stared at him as he left, contemplating his words.

And so I decided. I would be the first to fix it.

That night I drove to his house. I was ready to apologize.

Raindrops fell here and there onto the warm dusty asphalt causing the typical smell that made my stomach churn. I pulled over and vomited on the side of the road.

After an hour and a half of driving, I finally reached his house. As I approached the front door of the house, I saw that it was slightly open. I walked into the living room and saw Reeve’s clothes were all over the floor. He probably got caught in the rain too. Nobody was inside but the TV was on.

I walked toward our room. At the top of the stairs, I saw the bedroom door was slightly open. As I neared the bedroom, I heard sounds. Sounds that were sensual—moans and groans. I almost didn’t want to open the bedroom door to find out what or who was making those sounds.

I let out a long deep breath, trying to calm my racing heart and thoughts. I decided to fully push open the door, and what I saw surprised me.

I saw Eve’s head between the outstretched legs of Reeve, pleasuring him. Reeve’s eyes were closed and he wasn’t moving.

My mouth was hanging slightly open in shock. I stood there frozen for a moment like a trapped animal. I had been too shocked and mortified to move. Reeve had ditched me for another, just like I always feared he would.

There was a moment of stunned silence. I cringed slightly and stepped back away from the door as I waited for the outburst that was sure to follow.

I supposed Eve noticed the movement; her head jerked up and her eyes softened a little as a small grin touched her face. “Agata.” Settling herself down on the edge of the bed, she looked toward me. A sly smirk slowly grew on her lips and she let out a low, sarcastic chuckle. “And look who decides to turn up. Your timing is impeccable.”

Reeve groaned and our heads turned toward him. He grumbled and turned over onto the other side of the bed, putting a pillow over his head.

“He’s tired,” Eve muttered. I hated the way her voice sounded.

I was holding back a sheer amount of menace at the moment and it seemed to be continually growing at a dangerous rate.

Seeing the look on my face, realizing she was expecting me to yell at her, I completely surprised her by smiling instead. “I can’t say I’m not surprised to see you here,” I told her softly.

“Y-you’re not mad?” she questioned cautiously.

I tilted my head to one side, looking a little confused. “Should I be?”

Bitch!
The thought was screaming at the top of my head. Before she could answer, my hand landed on her face. She fell to the floor with the sheer force of my slap. I lunged at her. I blew up, my anger skyrocketing out of control.

“You bitch! Mother fuckin’ bitch!” My voice thundered around the room as I charged toward her and continuously slapped her face.

“Stop, please!” Her voice came out as a horrified strangle. After hearing her cry of pain, I stopped, my arms falling limp by my sides.

No reaction from Reeve at all. He was, incredibly, fast asleep.

Shaking myself out of a stupor, I straightened my clothes primly and stepped out of the house.

My head was still spinning; this night hadn’t turned out at all like I’d expected.

Needless to say, sleep did not come easy that night when I went back home. When I finally did drift off, the minutes were fraught with treacherous pain in the pit of my stomach. I stood and slowly trudged to the sink in the bathroom. I returned to bed and sunk down with a sigh. Seconds passed like hours, drowning in the soul-sucking whiteness of the ceiling hanging above me.

I woke up the next morning before my alarm had even gone off. I am not sure if I even slept the entire night. I felt like crap and was sluggish, my motor functions not entirely in sync with my brains.

The shower was a glorious escape. I leaned against the tiled wall, wearily washing the sluggishness from my body. I felt like I’d just come out of a coma, all fuzzy and not quite here.

I stepped out of the shower and readied myself for the day.

Dad was sitting at the breakfast bar, the newspaper open in front of him.

He looked up at me as I walked into the kitchen, flashing me a smile. “Morning,” he greeted, looking back down at the newspaper.

“Morning, Dad.” I simply replied and went to grab a mug and poured myself out some coffee.

“Sleep well?” he inquired.

“Yeah.” I didn’t bother to look up from the coffee I was sipping, nodding in response. Dad stood up, grabbed a bowl of cereal, poured on some milk, and placed the bowl in front of me.

“You look so tired, honey. What’s wrong?”

“I’m fine, Dad,” I lied, taking a mouthful of cereal. I only managed to get a couple of hours sleep. I spent almost the entire night tossing, turning, and crying over Reeve.

“Do you want a ride to the university?” he offered. “It’s your Mom’s routine checkup today.”

“Uhm…I’m not going to the university, Dad,” I said, my eyes downcast. “I figured there’s no use marching for the graduation. While my graduation marks the beginning of a new chapter in my life, for the others, it’s the end of their dreams.”

“Honey, what do you mean?” Dad looked at me intently, closing the newspaper and clearing his throat.

I looked up at him and sucked in a shaky breath. “I already completed my degree requirements, Dad. So technically, I am a degree holder. Let’s just wait for the release of my diploma.”

Dad furrowed his brow. “I don’t like where this conversation is heading, Agata.”

I averted my gaze, looking down at my cereal.

“Are you pregnant?” Dad asked.

I laughed, shaking my head in amusement, but my eyes were filled with emotions. I bit my lip, “Don’t worry, Dad I’m one hundred percent not pregnant. And it’s because I’m not pregnant I can do whatever I want with my life and I can go places where I want to be.” My voice was breaking. A nervous smile spread across my lips.

Dad sat down in a chair near me. He smiled, holding the side of my face. “Find what makes you happy and go for it with all your heart.” Those soft, loving eyes watched me with all the hope and fear warring inside me. He stood up from his chair and hugged me as he kissed the top of my head.

“Thank you, Dad. I love you,” I murmured on his chest, relieved and grateful that my old man respected my decision.

***

I stared at my phone, my fingers fidgeting Caleb’s calling card. I was thinking of calling him the entire day.

After a few minutes of contemplating, I decided to dial his number. His phone rang. After about the five rings, I was ready to hang up.

“Hello?” he finally answered. I paused for a long moment as I tried to collect my thoughts.

“M-may I speak with Caleb Wagner?” my voice quivered through the phone.

“Speaking, who’s this?” My heart pounded in my chest at the sound of his voice.

“It’s me, Agata.”

“Agata!” Even over the phone, I could hear the smile in his voice. “It’s so nice to hear from you! What made you call me?”

I took a deep breath before I answered him. “You told me to think about what I want. That whatever I decided to do, make sure it’ll make me happy. I want to pursue photography, Caleb. I want to get out of this place. I guess I was wondering, does your offer still stand?”

Caleb laughed a little on the other line. “Are you kidding me, Agata? Of course! When would you like to start?”

“Tomorrow,” I answered right away.

“Are you sure?” he asked dubiously.

“Yeah, why? Can I not start right away? It’s okay I’ll just ca—”

“No…no…no of course, you can start anytime you like.” He cut me off when I was about to hang up.

“I was just asking if you’re sure about your decision,” Caleb explained. “Once you have decided to leave, things are gonna be drastically different, and there’s no turning back.”

I was suddenly filled with the turmoil of the choice I was about to make. I paused for a while and took a deep breath. “I’m ready.”

“Good. Send me your personal details and email address. I’m going to book you a flight to L.A. tomorrow and send your itinerary to your email.”

“Okay. Thank you, Caleb.”

“I’ll see you tomorrow,” he bade in a cheerful voice.

“See you then.” I replied before hanging up my phone and tossing it on the bed.

I stared off into space; it was only then that I could see everything in new light. What Reeve had done was inexcusable. He had hurt me down to my core, and in my pain, he had cut me off instead of trying harder to get through to me. That’s how badly he hurt me.

***

We managed to make it to the airport in thirty minutes. My eyes had been on the road and every car that we’d passed by had been a blur.

“Are you ready for this?” Dad asked the question I was asking myself.

“I think.” I smiled and took my luggage from his hand.

“Take care of yourself, Agata. I’ll take care of whatever you left behind at the university,” Mikael said, laying a hand on my cheek.

“I will. Take care of Rogue and your baby,” I said as I turned to walk toward the security checkpoint. “Bye Mom, I’ll come home on your birthday.” I knelt down at my mom sitting on her wheelchair. I heard my heart breaking into a million pieces.

“Take care of yourself and please do call us whenever you can,” Dad squeezed my shoulder. I stood up and looked at him. I felt my breath catch; the tears I had been holding back rolled down my cheeks.

“I will, of course,” I barely choked out the last words. “Dad, please promise me you won’t tell him where I am. I don’t want to hear anything about him, ever.” Dad just stared at me. “Promise me.”