Unforgettable (3 page)

Chapter Two

 
After I got over my panic attack, I didn’t have a moment to myself to think. Before I could even get my bearings, an orderly came in with another wheelchair to take me for testing. I don’t know why they had to wheel me there, I could walk perfectly fine. I walked from the bed to the chair with no mishap, anyway.

 
I was hoping that I would have some kind of breakthrough while I was in the CT scanning machine. I didn’t. Nothing was clear to me. I know I have a Chihuahua named Lucy. I got her as soon as I graduated from culinary school after college. She was a rescue, so I don’t know how old she is, but earlier Carrie said she stopped by my house and fed her, so at least I know she’s doing okay. Carrie said she fed someone else, but I was freaked out by that time that I didn’t question her and now she’s not here. Maybe I got another dog or possibly a cat. I always felt guilty leaving Lucy alone for such long shifts at the restaurant. But evidently I don’t work at the restaurant anymore, so I don’t have a clue.

 
I was relieved when I got back to the room and found it empty. I wasn’t ready to deal with what I had learned today. Dr. Turner said I was suffering from retrograde amnesia. He wasn’t sure why I couldn’t remember the last two years. I wondered the same thing. Did something so bad happen that my mind was blocking it out? If so, it’s got to be really bad. I work for myself now, so that’s awesome. It probably had to do with Ethan. That’s what made the most sense to me.

 
Okay, Ethan looks good, that’s obvious. His eyes are a beautiful color of emerald, plus he’s tall and built like a swimmer. His black hair is a little sloppy, but he dresses a lot better than I do, at least from what I can remember about him. That was the big problem. I don’t really know. I mean, I only know him as Carrie’s brother. Of course we’ve hung out lots of times, but Carrie was always there. I couldn’t think of a single time that Ethan and I had spent any time alone.

 
Carrie’s been my best friend since sophomore year of college when we lived across the hall from each other in the same dorm. We gravitated towards each other since we each had roommates we didn’t get along with. Well, Carrie didn’t get along with her roommate. My roommate was a psycho and I tried to avoid spending time in my room while she was awake. Carrie and I got an apartment together our junior year and lived together until a couple of years ago.

 
Hmm. I guess it’s been like four years now. I didn’t want to think about that. I don’t know the person I’m supposed to be now. On the plus side, I don’t seem to have aged much. I know because when I went to the bathroom earlier I looked hard at myself. I was shocked at first; my hair was so dark it was almost black. The last time I remember dyeing it, it was red. I was happy to see that my bangs, a horrible error in judgment, had finally grown out. I was also more pale than usual so my dark eyes stood out, but all in all I was relieved to see I looked pretty much the same.

 
My mother called on the room phone just after I got back from my testing. She was still on the road, but she should be arriving any time now. Yakima is only a few hours away from Seattle and she left when Ethan called her this morning.

 
Yeah, back to Ethan. I didn’t know what to feel. He wasn’t here when I got back to my room and I was happy for the reprieve. I have no clue what to do there. I don’t love him. He’s great-he’s Carrie’s brother. I’ve known him for years and he’s fun to be around and everything, He’s also quite possibly the most polite and gentlemanly person I’ve ever met next to Carrie’s dad, Robert. But he’s still Carrie’s little brother. I just couldn’t wrap my head around the fact that we were a couple.
Too weird
.

 
This was
all
too strange. I don’t even know what’s in my refrigerator right now. A simple thing really, but it’s a big deal if you can’t remember. At least for me. I don’t like change. I need to know what’s what all the time. Right now I feel like my world has been turned upside down. That’s why I couldn’t bring myself to believe I was involved with Ethan. How could he go from being Carrie’s little brother to my
boyfriend
? Is that even the right term? Is it live-in lover? No, I don’t like the sound of that. Anyway, the point is that he’s like five years younger than me. He’s only twenty four. I’m almost thirty. Oh lord, I was almost thirty
two years ago.
I’m thirty one now. No, it’s September, I’m thirty two.

 
I’ve got to stop thinking. It’s not helping. It’s only making my chest tight. I want to go to sleep and wake up and have everything be normal.

 
I don’t know how long I had been staring at the ceiling before the door opened and the nurse from earlier came back in. She smiled and walked over to the machine at the side of my bed. She nodded as she jotted down something then turned to me.

 
“Are you feeling okay?” Hmm. Physically, I guess I felt all right. My stomach growled. When did I eat last?

 
“Okay. I’m pretty hungry, though. Can I get something to eat?”

 
“Yes.” She looked down at her watch. “The lunch cart should be around shortly,” she answered and went to a chair over by the door with a newspaper sitting on it. I hadn’t noticed it before or I would have already looked through it. “It’s from yesterday, but at least you’ll be able to get some current information from it.” She handed me the paper and I pored over the headlines.

 
Nothing good stared back at me. We’re in a recession, we’re still in Iraq. Everything looked about the same.

 
I scanned the top of the paper. Yep, September 21, 2011. I flopped back on the pillow and closed my eyes. I just wanted to rest my brain. I’m not ready to deal with this yet. A few seconds later I heard the rattle of the lunch cart down the hall, sleep would have to wait.

 
“Honey, are you feeling better?” My mother had come in without me noticing. I braced myself for any possible surprises before I opened my eyes.

 
“Yeah Mom, I’m feeling a lot better. Thanks for coming.” Gloria had added some blonde highlights to her hair since I had seen her last but I didn’t notice anything drastic.

 
“Well, Ethan called and told me you had a head injury so I just hopped in the car and got on the road. You look okay, though, besides the bruise on the side of your face.” She sounded almost disappointed that I wasn’t wrapped in bandages and in traction.

 
“I
am
having a bit of a problem. Evidently, I’ve got some sort of amnesia.”

 
Gloria looked at me like I was kidding at first. A second later she looked aghast. “Amnesia, what do you mean? You know who
I
am. What have you forgotten?”

 
“The last two years, apparently. I don’t remember anything after 2009.”

 
She just sat there with a strange look on her face as I struggled to find something to say. We didn’t have some bosom buddy type relationship like some mothers and daughters do. We pretty much left each other alone until the holidays or some crisis. Well, here’s a crisis.
Crap
. Unfortunately, she just doesn’t have it in her to make me feel better.

 
Just then I heard the cart stop outside the door. An orderly (well, I guess he was an orderly, he didn’t look old enough to have gone through any kind of medical training) poked his head in.

 
He smiled at me and he looked so hilarious in his hairnet that I couldn’t resist grinning back at him. “You didn’t fill out your lunch card this morning. Do you want meatloaf or the chicken cutlet?” Hmm, choices.

 
“I guess the meatloaf.” He went to the cart and brought over a tray that had a dish covered with a plastic dome, a little milk carton like you get in elementary school, and a pudding cup. Wow, they go all out at Seattle General.

 
“Thanks.” He left and I started in on my food so that I didn’t have to speak to my mother. It was surprisingly good.

 
“So I guess you don’t remember that I got divorced from Bill last year, huh?” Oh yeah, my mom was still sitting in the chair. I looked up at this new revelation.

 
“You divorced Bill? Why?” Bill was actually a good guy. This hit me out of left field. I took another bite of my meatloaf. It needed salt. I found the tiny paper packets of salt and pepper. As I waited for my mother to answer me I ripped it open and the salt spilled over the entire plate. Dang it.

 
“I just got tired of all the boredom. He never wanted to go out and do anything. He wanted to stay home and work in the yard.” She said it like it was a crime. Poor Bill was on the road for years as a salesman and finally, when he gets a chance to be at home, Gloria dumps him?

 
I threw my arm over my eyes. I really couldn’t deal with this right now. Why had Ethan called her? Things must have seemed pretty dire this morning.

 
“Ooh Ethan. It’s nice to see you again.” Mom’s voice pulled me out of my thoughts. I moved my arm so that I could see him. The door was still open from the lunch delivery so I hadn’t heard him come in. My stomach flipped over. Wow, I haven’t felt the butterflies since high school.

 
“Hello Gloria. How was your drive?” He leaned down and gave her a kiss on the cheek. He was only being polite but it grated on my nerves. I didn’t even realize they knew each other.

 
“It was long. The rain made me have to drive extra slowly. I just want to relax and get something to eat.” She looked over at my lunch and scrunched up her nose. Uh, your daughter is lying over here in a
hospital
bed suffering from some kind of head trauma. I hated the way she tried to make everything about herself.

 
Ethan walked past her and up to me. “Any change?” he asked me hopefully.

 
“No.” His face fell and I felt a little guilty for not remembering what he obviously wanted me to. It still felt strange, but I felt more comfortable with Ethan than with my own mother.
How screwed up is that?

 
“It’ll come.” He squeezed my hand and I looked down. I didn’t want to see the disappointment that I couldn’t do anything about.

 
“Ethan, what have you been up to?” my mother asked. I must have made some kind of face because he squeezed my hand again.

 
“I’m sorry,” he mouthed silently before he turned to my mother. “Work’s been busy and Juliet’s cookbook is coming along great.” He looked over at me.

 
I shook my head. Sorry, still don’t recall anything about it.

 
I wanted to ask him questions about us, about me, but I didn’t want to do that in front of Gloria. I was about to suggest she go down to the cafeteria when Carrie’s dad walked in.

 
“Juliet, how are you feeling? Dr. Turner filled me in on your problem.” He walked around to the other side of my bed so I turned my attention to him.

 
I didn’t know how to answer him. I was feeling lost. I was feeling scared. Did he want the truth? “Fine,” I lied.

 
He looked into my eyes. “You’re looking better than last night. Give it time.” My throat felt thick and my eyes started to tear up. Robert patted my hand and exchanged a look with Ethan, before turning to Gloria.

 
“Gloria, it’s a pleasure to see you again. I was going to have a cup of coffee, would you care to join me?” It was like Robert could read my mind.

 
“That would be great. I was just telling Ethan I could use a bite to eat.” She got up and grabbed her huge purse which was on the floor beside her. “I’ll be back in a little while, Juliet.”

 
I smiled and lifted my hand in a weak wave and she and Robert left the room.

 
“I’m sorry about that. I was so worried about you this morning that I felt I had to call her. She
is
your mother.”

 
“It’s okay; you couldn’t know how she would be.”