University Park Series Box Set: Books 1-3 (47 page)

“Then why did he break up with you and
go and get drunk and drugged up?”

“He only got wasted because Mom
convinced him that he wasn’t right for me. He drank to forget about the pain of
leaving me and while he was drunk, someone slipped a pill in his drink.”

Dad narrowed his eyes. “Are you sure
he’s —”

“I know. At first, I thought it was a
lie. But when his friend showed me a picture, that someone happened to take, of
a guy dropping a few pills in his drink, I knew Raven was telling me the truth.
Someone drugged him, purposefully. He did consume too much alcohol, but he didn’t
take those pills intentionally. He’s been trying really hard to stay clean and…
well, I want to help him do that.”

“You’ve chosen a difficult task, Lexi.”
Dad kept my hands in his and the warmth made me feel so safe, as if he truly
understood everything I was facing and wouldn’t make me face it alone.

“I know.”

“Just answer one thing. Do you love him
that much?”

I looked my dad straight in the eye.
Knowing what was written on my heart and embedded deep within my soul, I wasn’t
afraid to admit the truth. “I do, Dad. I love every part of him.”

“Then I’ll be here to support you.” He
pulled out his handkerchief and handed it to me. “I swear, you nor your mom
ever have a tissue when you need one.”

“Thank you, Dad.” I blotted my face and
wiped my nose.

“So, will you introduce me to him?”

“I guess.” I started to pull my phone
out of my wristlet when my dad stopped me.

“How about we just cross the street?” He
cast an all-knowing look.

“What?” I glanced at my dad and then to
the opposite side of the street. At the restaurant that faced the duck pond,
was Raven’s car. He had followed us after all.

“Either he really cares about you or he
doesn’t trust me with you.”

I laughed. “He didn’t want to lose me,
that’s all.”

“Well, he hasn’t.” Dad grabbed my hand
and pulled me to my feet. “Let’s go assure him that you’re not going anywhere
but home with him.”

Σ

Introducing Raven to my dad went better
than expected. At first, I didn’t know if Raven was going to be amiable toward
him, especially after everything that happened, but he seemed excited to
finally meet him. And my dad seemed to approve of him. They chatted about Star
Wars and The Walking Dead, both excited for the next season to launch in
February. I figured Raven would eventually pull me in. Even though I didn’t
care to watch a show about the end of times with the revived on a man-eating
quest for intestines and brains, if sharing my life with Raven included that,
I’d happily oblige.

Raven held the door open as we entered
the Baxter Building, where the financial aid offices and counselors were
located. I had to apply for graduation and I needed to know my options
regarding my degree. I wanted to discuss changing my minor and I hoped it
wasn’t too late. Purposefully, I had scheduled my appointment fifteen minutes
after Raven had to be at his first session with the appointed school therapist.
I reasoned with myself that it wasn’t about trust; it was about doing my part.
It was about being there for him; being his accountability partner and making
sure he made it to his meeting on time.

 We walked up the flight of stairs and
Raven stopped. “Aren’t the degree counselor’s on this floor?”

“Yes, but my appointment isn’t until ten
forty-five.” I grabbed the railing and placed my foot on the next step, leading
up to the third floor. “I’ll walk with you to your appointment.”

He eyed me for a moment and his face
turned hard. He pursed his lips together while gripping the strap of his
backpack until the calluses on his knuckles smoothed. Passing me, he said, “I
don’t need an escort.” Taking the steps two at a time, he darted to the top.

“Raven.” I stomped after him, calling
his name repeatedly, but he ignored me. “Don’t be mad.”

He paused when he reached the top of the
stairs. A few students were behind us and we stepped aside, allowing them to
pass. In a gentle fashion, I placed my hand on his arm. “The last thing I want
is for you to think I’m watching you like a parent or a policeman, because I’m
not. I’m just here to support you. That’s all.”

He slumped against the wall and tilted
his head back. Clenching his hands into fists, he closed his eyes. He took
several deep breaths and I could tell he was battling something inside.

A past hurt.

A torment.

Something that I had to allow him to
deal with because I couldn’t do it for him. I took a few steps back, keeping a
safe distance. The last thing I wanted was to come between him and his demons.

“I’ll leave if that’s what you want,” I
said in a low voice. “I was only trying to help.” I turned to go down the
stairs when his hand pulled me back.

“Don’t go. I’m sorry,” he whispered, his
eyes pleading for my forgiveness.

It took a second for me to shove past
his hurtful comment, but I did. Raven needed me and I would keep my promise, no
matter what he said or did. “Why is it so hard to let me in? I only want to
help you.”

The green in his eyes turned a darker
shade and his face stone hard. “You don’t want in, believe me. My mind can be a
cold, dark place. Not a place for someone innocent like you.”

I swallowed — hard. It hurt hearing how
tormented his mind was and I couldn’t even fathom what it was like for him; how
much pain and despair he encountered on a daily basis.

What he thought.

What he experienced.

What he fought.

What made him give in, time and time
again.

“The only place I want in is right
here.” I placed my hand on his heart. “If we can get your heart healed, then I know
it can heal whatever torments your mind.” His body shifted and then relaxed
under my touch. He released an audible breath as though pushing past the vice
that kept his heart guarded and protected. “I’m not asking you to tell me those
horrid thoughts, just open your heart to allow me in and love me.”

“I do love you.” He smiled and his eyes
flickered a lighter shade.

“Then let me stand by your side. All I
want is for you to get better.”

He latched onto my hand and raised it to
his lips, pressing a soft kiss to my palm. Slowly, his eyes met mine.

“This isn’t going to be easy for me,
Lexi. The last thing I want is to disappoint or hurt you again.”

“That’s the last thing I want, too. But
I’m going to keep my promise.”

“At what point will you see that I’m not
worth that promise?”

My nose stung and the muscles around my
vocal cords tightened, but I refused to cry. It pained me to hear him talk
about his life that way. That he wasn’t worth much. Just like that day at the
restaurant when he tossed that paper napkin to the side. Raven had treated his
life with a nonchalant and carefree attitude that scared me. But I had to be
strong — strong for Raven.

“Never. You’re worth it, no matter what
you put us through.”

I couldn’t deny that there was another
side of his comment that made me weary.

The trust factor.

As much as I refused to think
negatively, he’d laid it out for me in vivid colors — I might end up getting
hurt in the end. Despite how much he wanted to do this, he couldn’t hold to his
promises. I appreciated the honesty, but it was working in the opposite
direction of trust.

“But you don’t deserve to be hurt
anymore,” he said, his eyes boring into mine, as if trying to gauge my honesty.
I held my gaze steady to his, not flinching and definitely not blinking. I was
being one-hundred-percent honest and I wanted him to see it. Even though I knew
my heart couldn’t handle another break, I was willing to stick through it. I
only hoped that it resulted with me being by his side forever.

“And neither do you. So, you do your
part and I promise I’ll do mine.”

“How did I get so lucky?” He pulled me
closer, embracing me tightly, like he never wanted to let me go. I prayed that
he didn’t.

I shrugged. “You must be on God’s
special list. I’ll tell you that.”

He chuckled and a full smile brightened
his eyes. This was definitely the Raven I loved to see. “I guess.”

“C’mon.” He latched on to my hand. “I
don’t want to be late.”

We walked down the hall until we arrived
at a door marked
The Center for Behavioral Counseling.
A list of names,
followed by credentials, indicated who occupied the clinic. Raven’s eyes
traveled past the wording and then landed on me. I knew what he was thinking.

“Give it a chance.”

He nodded, took a deep breath, and then
opened the door. We
entered the quaint office decorated in cool colors
of light blue, green, and purple, which created an emotionally appealing
atmosphere. Pictures of beach houses lined the walls and fresh flowers created
a burst of sunshine. A student wearing glasses and a button up peach cardigan,
greeted us. She was the poster child for a typical wanna-be therapist with
subtle makeup and her hair in a tight bun. “Hello. Can I help you?”

Raven stalled for a moment and I gave
him a gentle nudge. “Yes, I’m here to meet with Dr. Galen.”

The dark headed girl gave a friendly
smile that made her eyes narrow. “Your name, please?”

“Raven,” he cleared his throat,
“Davenport.”

She stalled for a second and then
adjusted her glasses, taking a few seconds before she continued with her tasks.
Her finger looked like it had a mind of its own as it did several rapid clicks
with the mouse. “Please, have a seat. I’ll let him know you’re here,” she said
with a little too much enthusiasm — vibrancy I wished Raven had and not her.
The last thing he needed was another girl after him, especially at his
therapist office.

“Thanks.” Raven seemed oblivious to his
hormone-inducing-scent and walked over to a row of chairs. I followed him,
placing a hand on his lower back, just below the band of his jeans, letting the
girl know that only my hands were allowed on him. Instead of sitting, Raven
shoved his hands in his pockets. “If you need to go, I understand.” He kept a
tight lip as his gaze darted between the door, the receptionist, and me. I
wasn’t sure if he was considering walking out but I wasn’t leaving until he
went in the back to see the therapist.

I glanced at the time on my phone. “I’m
good.” In a bold action, I took a step toward the door. “Unless you want me to
leave?”

“No.” He shook his head. “I just didn’t
want you to be late.” His face contorted in a nervous smile and fear loomed in
the blacks of his eyes. Hidden behind his alluring eyes was a strife that he
refused to reveal, and it was winning. He was allowing it to slowly destroy
him. I just hoped that this counselor knew how to pull it out before it was too
late.

Before I could reassure him that he’d be
okay, the student stood up and said, “Dr. Galen is ready to see you.” She
leaned on her desk, shifting her weight to the side as she tried to show her
curvy figure and painted on pencil skirt. I shot her a disapproving gaze that
made her sit down.

Raven froze for a moment and then
blinked. An unfamiliar expression appeared across his face, almost like a
prophetic word gave him the reassurance he needed. He leaned forward, until the
tips of our noses touched. “Wait for me, in case I get done before you do.” He
pressed his lips to mine. “Okay?”

“Okay. I’ll wait on the second floor.” I
puckered my lips to his, wanting to show the girl that his lips belonged on me
— only me — but he pulled away too quickly, only allowing me a peck.

Raven walked toward the small corridor
with a confident and determined stride that I hadn’t seen in quite some time. “It’s
the second door on the left,” the student said, pointing him in the right
direction.

 I immediately noticed the quick sweep
of her gaze and the flush on her cheeks as she appraised Raven from head to
toe, despite my efforts to show he was taken. My boyfriend might have been
broken on the inside, but he wasn’t broken on the outside. It reminded me that
I was the luckiest girl in the world.

As I walked out of the therapist’s
office, I hoped the girl wouldn’t cause any trouble for us. Seeing as Raven hadn’t
even seemed to notice her flirtatious attempts to capture his attention, I had
to take that leap of faith and try to trust that he would do the right thing if
she made any sexual propositions. It was obvious that I would never be able to
control the way women looked at him, and I definitely didn’t want to be the
jealous type, so I’d have to learn to deal with it and appreciate that women
wanted what was mine.

As I walked down the stairs and toward
the academic counseling area, I thought about what I wanted. I’d reviewed a few
of my options last night after I got home from meeting my dad. Part of me
wished I would’ve talked about my decision not to pursue a teaching
certification with him, but I figured I needed to take things slowly. He was
just coming around. I didn’t need any additional shock to change his mind.

The area swarmed with students — most of
them probably trying to make last minute changes to their schedules or hoping
to enroll. I was glad that I had scheduled my appointment online because it
looked like the wait was an hour or longer. I stepped in the line for
Appointments
Only.

“Can I help you?” A guy behind the
counter asked, rolling his eyes. The tension and chaos in the room made it
obvious that he was overworked and tired of hearing complaints from students.
The majority of the clerical positions were held by students working part-time
as they attended school full-time. Kind of like what I had done in the Writing
Lab. Thinking about that reminded me to call Dr. Phillips to see if I could
start tutoring again.

“Yes, I have an appointment at ten
forty-five with Mrs. Sheffield.”

The guy sighed. “Name and student ID.”

I wanted to tell him if he didn’t wear
such tight T-shirts with the words
Suck It
on the front then maybe he
could breathe better, but I refrained. “Lexi Thompson.” I pulled out my ID from
my wristlet and handed it to him. He reviewed my information quickly and then
swiped it through a card reader.

“They will call you when she’s ready.”
He handed me my ID. “Next,” he said, looking over my shoulder. The guy seemed
miserable working his part-time job and it reaffirmed my decision not to be a
teacher. Life was too short to be that unhappy. While I knew the job was
probably a temporary one for him, it still sucked if he hated what he did.
Which explained the message on his shirt.

I took a seat and waited for the
counselor. I thumbed through my school paperwork, making sure I had everything
in place, just in case I needed it. Seeing all the classes I’d already taken
made me feel a little sad. This was my last semester at PHU. I would be
graduating after four years of hard work. Never in a million years would I have
thought things would’ve turned out like they did, but I was glad that I had
made the decision to start living my life for me. More than anything, I was
glad I wasn’t getting married to someone I didn’t love.