University Park Series Box Set: Books 1-3 (60 page)

BOOK: University Park Series Box Set: Books 1-3
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The line was quite for a moment and I
heard a lady talking in the background. I listened for a moment to see if I
could hear Raven, but the sound was muffled. “Lexi, I gotta go. Just give him a
day or two. Let him work through this on his own. He’ll be back.”

“Alright.” I might have agreed verbally,
but physically, I needed to see him. I needed to know he was okay. Most of all,
I needed to hear directly from Raven’s mouth that it wasn’t over between us.

“Okay, talk to you later.”

“Shawn, wait.”

“Yeah?”

In a desperate plea, I said, “Promise me
you won’t let anything happen to him.”

“I promise.”

“Thanks.” I hung up the phone and then
sent everyone a message, telling them that Raven was with Shawn and he was
okay. After texting back and forth with everyone, I finally decided to try to
get some work done.

With a renewed purpose, I was able to
finish the edits for the two students. Diving nose deep into something I
enjoyed seemed to help the time pass. How I concentrated, I don’t know. Maybe
it was because I was going on Shawn’s words, in true faith, that Raven would be
home soon. Maybe it was because the two papers were by students taking a
creative writing class and their stories really sucked me in.

I stayed at Raven and Josh’s apartment
one more night, hoping that I’d awaken to Raven standing over the bed. But that
was wishful thinking. Instead, I woke up to the alarm on my phone. I really
didn’t want to go to class, but I’d already missed Tuesday because of the
hearing and I had a test next week in two classes. If I didn’t go today, I’d be
screwed.

A knock came at the door and for a
second, I got excited. But then I realized if it were Raven, he would’ve walked
in. “Are you up, Lexi?” Shelby’s voice filtered through the door.

“Yeah, come in.” I tied the laces on my
black Chucks and stood up.

“Need a ride to class?” Shelby stood in
the doorway, a smile touching her lips. I guess she was glad to see me up and
moving around, instead of crying in bed.

“Yeah, if Josh doesn’t mind.” I shoved
my laptop into my book bag and grabbed my purse.

“I don’t mind.” Josh slipped by Shelby
and walked in the room. “I’m watching out for Raven’s girl.” He wrapped his arm
around me and gave me a slight squeeze until I finally smiled. Hearing those
words struck a chord within me. A lighthearted chord that only Raven could make
sound beautiful. More beautiful than my fingers hitting the keys on the piano.
“Quit worrying, Lexi. He’s going to come back. Just give him some time.”

“I know.”

I went to class, but it was pointless.
All I did was think about Raven. Whether he was okay. When he was coming home. Why
he wouldn’t text or call, despite what Shawn had told me. After class, I met
Josh, Shelby, and Delaney at the student union dining area. I hadn’t been in
there since Raven proposed to me. It brought back all the good memories until I
noticed that all eyes were on me — once again. Word spread fast about Raven and
everyone was talking about him. He was the main topic of conversation and I was
the second.

“Are you okay?” Delaney asked. “You
haven’t even touched your salad.”

“I guess I’m not hungry.” I shrugged,
twiddling with the diamond on my engagement ring. Every time I turned it a
certain way, the light would hit it just right, causing it to sparkle. Just
like Raven’s eyes when he asked me to marry him. “I guess I hate all of this
gossip going around.” I looked over my shoulder and immediately caught Abby,
the brunette Silicone Triplet, whispering to one of her friends. It was obvious
whom they were talking about.

Delaney pivoted in her chair and rolled
her eyes. “Forget about those bitches.” Delaney stood up and shot them the
finger. “That’s right. Mind your own fuckin’ business.”

“Laney.” I pulled on her scarf until she
dropped to her seat.

“Oh my God, those girls are going to
come over here and want to start something.” Shelby glared at Delaney. “I
already got one ticket, I don’t need another. And I surely don’t need to get
kicked out of school.”

My eyes closed. It was so easy for
people to joke about that, but it was something else entirely when it impacted
you or someone you loved.

“Lexi, I’m sorry. I—”

“It’s okay.” I held up a hand, telling
her to stop before she said more damaging words.

“Seriously, girl, calm down,” Josh told
Delaney. “We’re all walking a fine line here.”

And he was right. We didn’t need any
more drama.

“Sorry. I’m just trying to watch out for
my girl.” Delaney leaned her head on my shoulder. It seemed like everyone was
watching out for me, except for the one person I wanted to most — Raven.

 “Sorry, Lexi. I guess we should have
eaten off campus.” Josh gave me a heartfelt smile. “We can go, if you want.” He
started to grab his backpack.

“No, it’s okay. Let’s just eat and go
back to the apartment. I want to see if Raven is back.”

Everyone finished their food, except for
me. The voices, everyone staring at me, the whispering behind my back — it was
too much. All I could think about was Raven. I had to talk to him. I had to see
him. I couldn’t wait any longer. It had been nearly two full days.

It seemed like it took forever to get
back to the apartment. I held onto the back of Shelby’s seat, my leg bouncing
with anticipation as we pulled into the parking lot of the apartment.
Immediately, I noticed Raven’s car was gone.

“Stop the truck. Stop the truck.” I
unfastened my seatbelt and flung the door open before Josh even had a chance to
fully stop.

“Lexi. Wait!” Josh demanded, but I
ignored him.

I jumped out of the truck, scanning the
parking lot for Raven’s Charger, but it was nowhere in sight. I fumbled for the
keys in my backpack as I stumbled across the gravel and onto the sidewalk. My
pulse raced, feeding my blood with the adrenaline it needed to get me up the
stairs. I took them two at a time, slipping at the very top. My chin clipped
the edge of the metal step and I let out a yelp.

“Lexi. Let me help you!” Shelby called.

I didn’t wait for her. I pulled myself
up, holding onto the railing. Leaving my backpack behind, I stumbled to the
front door. My hand shook as I tried to get the key in the hole. After several
attempts, I finally shoved the key in the opening and unlocked the door. I
turned the knob and pushed the door open.

“Raven?” I hobbled in the front door,
holding onto my leg. “Are you here?”

My eyes darted around the living room
and then the dining room, but there was no sight of him. I limped my way into
his bedroom and pushed the door open. The room was stripped bare. The pictures
of us on the nightstand were missing. The alarm clock and lamp were taken, too.
Everything was gone, except for the furniture. The closet door was left open,
revealing only my clothes. All of his belongings were gone. My body heaved
forward and I fell on top of the barren mattress. Tears gushed from my eyes as
everything I had feared came true. Everything was over, just like he’d said.
Raven had left me again.

 

Σ

Chapter 17

 

 

“Lexi?” Dr. Phillips called to get my
attention.

“Yes, sir?” I shut the book I had been
staring at for the last ten minutes. For the past four weeks, I had managed to
get by without Raven, devoting all my efforts to studying. Graduating from college
was all I had left. I was hanging from the gallows of heartache with a heart
that was barely holding together. But life went on, and I was doing my best to
try to get my life going again. Finals were in two weeks and graduation in
three. I was getting the hell out of PHU with my degree.

“Do you have a minute? I’d like to talk
to you about a few things.” He stood in his doorway, chewing on the tip of his
eyeglasses.

“Yes.” I gathered my stuff and walked into
his office. I shut the door and sat on the worn pleather chair. It was like
déjà vu and I immediately felt sick. For his sake, I hope he didn’t have
another athlete for me to tutor. If so, I’d lose it.

“How’s everything going?” He reclined in
his chair and it squeaked as he rocked back and forth.

I shrugged. “Okay, I guess.” Dare I tell
him that I had actually gone a full five days without crying? That this was the
first week I had actually felt a little stronger? That I was going to make it
without Raven? I was definitely making progress in removing myself from The
Raven’s trap. “I mean, as good as I can be.”

I caught him glancing at my ring finger.
Using my thumb, I casually slipped the diamond under my palm. Even though I had
come to terms with the fact that Raven left me, without even as much as a text,
phone call, or a letter to say why, I still couldn’t take my ring off.

“Do you have a job lined up? You haven’t
asked for any referrals or spoken with me about working this summer. I know
you’re graduating in a few weeks.”

“No.” I sighed. “I haven’t had time to
look.” Truthfully, I had no idea what I wanted to do. I was barely making it
through school. I needed to get my shit straight, because I really didn’t want
to go back home. As of now, that was my only option.

“Have you thought about grad school?” He
folded his glasses, set them down, and leaned against the desk. “Because I
could sure use a part-time Senior Writing Consultant and it would be perfect
for a grad student.” He winked.

“Seriously?” The world immediately
seemed brighter and so did his offer. I hadn’t even considered grad school. I had
just wanted out of PHU, but the more I thought about it, the more it made
sense. If I was going to take my editing career seriously, a master’s degree
would definitely make it possible. Not only that, but it would give me time to
get my grounding. I was used to school, studying, and editing papers. Keeping
up with that pace wouldn’t be a problem. Going out into the world, working for
some corporation, scared me a little. Maybe it was because I didn’t feel like I
was ready for that big of a change yet. Thanks to Raven.

“Yes, and as long as you’re accepted for
the fall semester, you can work here during the summer.”

My throat tightened and without warning,
my eyes watered. I was crying again.

Shit.

“I’m sorry. It’s just that—” With the
pads of my thumb, I wiped under my eyes, completely overcome by the fact that I
wouldn’t have to move back home as long as I could find a roommate and
somewhere to live.

“It’s okay. I know you’ve been through a
lot lately.” He handed me a few tissues. “I also have something else for you to
consider.” Stalling, he gauged my reaction, as though trying to determine whether
he should tell me, probably fearing I’d break down sobbing.

“Okay,” I sniffed, “what is it?”

He shifted in his chair and then said,
“I got a call from an alumna that graduated about five years back. She’s
working on self-publishing a young adult book and is looking for an editor. I
immediately thought of you.”

“Wow.” A new emotion surfaced,
transforming my sadness into tears of joy. “Really?” I had been thinking about
doing some freelance editing for writers, but hadn’t taken the time to look
into it. Recently, there had been a huge explosion of indie writers, and I saw
posts occasionally on Facebook and Twitter asking for editors.

“If you’re interested, I’ll let her
know.”

“Yes.” I wiped my nose and straightened
in my chair. “I’d like that.”

“Great.” Dr. Phillips smiled. “Think
about grad school and the part-time job offer and let me know what you decide.”
He scribbled her name and email on a sticky note and handed it to me.

“Okay. I will.” I stuck the note in my
backpack and headed for the door. “Thanks, Dr. Phillips. You don’t know how
much I needed this.”

“My pleasure, Lexi.”

I laid in bed that night, thinking about
what Dr. Philips had presented to me. It seemed logical and like a good move
for me. The only thing to consider was how the hell I was going to pay for grad
school. My parents had paid for the past four years, I wasn’t about to ask them
to send me to grad school, too. I was also tired of being at PHU. The rumors,
the snickering, the memories, both good and bad — it was all here, every
freakin’ day. It was as though Raven was staring me in the face. Everywhere I
turned, I saw images of him — of us. Everything reminded me of him. The
library, the stadium, and especially the damn piano I had to pass every day in
my dorm. There was no escaping it. PHU lived and reeked of The Raven’s trap.
But I had choices. I could finish school and get as far away from the memories
of Raven and me as soon as possible or learn to deal with them.

One thing was certain. I didn’t run. No,
Lexi Thompson wasn’t afraid to face her fears. If I wanted this, I would have
to learn to overcome them. Then I could start living life for me. Raven had
made his decision, and it didn’t include me.

A renewed purpose filtered through me
and by the end of the week, I had made my decision. I had officially applied
for grad school and a personal loan to cover the cost. The part-time job at the
writing center would cover my living expenses. If I landed a contract with the indie
writer, it would only sweeten the deal. Only thing left was finding a place to
live. Everything was falling into place, I just had to wait and see what
happened.

The best part was I had never felt so
strong in my entire life. There was a new Lexi Thompson and I liked her even
better than the one that was with Raven. I had officially broken free of The
Raven’s trap and it felt so damn good.

 

***

 

 “It’s official!” I smiled, unable to
hide the gleam radiating from within me. “You’re looking at the newest PHU grad
student.”

“Are you serious?” Delaney jumped off
the couch, taking down the curtains. “I can’t believe it!”

I held up my official acceptance letter.
“It just came in the mail today.” I shut the door to our dorm and weaved my way
through the boxes of stuff. We had four days to pack everything and get out. It
was amazing how much stuff two girls could accumulate over the years.

“So, does that mean you’re moving in
with me?” Delaney grasped the curtains tightly as she waited for my answer.

“Yes. I mean, where else would I go?” I
dropped the envelopes on the coffee table cluttered with pictures she’d taken
down. After informing Delaney that I’d applied to graduate school, she told me
that she was getting an apartment fairly close to campus. Luckily for me, she
got a killer deal on a one year lease for a two bedroom. Her parents were
giving her one year to get her photography business going, agreeing to support
her financially. I had a roommate and a place to live.

Delaney jumped off the couch, nearly
tripping on the scattered boxes as she grabbed my hands. “We’re going to have
our own apartment. We’re getting our own place.” She danced around with me in
the narrow space.

I laughed. “Delaney, we’ve had our own
place for the past two years.”

“The dorm doesn’t count.” She released
my hands. “I don’t know how you’re going back to school, but if that’s what
makes you happy, go for it. In fact, I haven’t seen you this happy in a very
long time.”

I caught her looking at my ring finger.
My bare ring finger. Last night, after I took a shower, I decided I didn’t want
to wear it any longer, so I put it in a safe place. It was part of breaking
free from Raven. Even though, deep down, I still loved him. He would always own
a part of my soul. Despite my efforts to eradicate him from my life, I cared
about him and found myself thinking about him constantly, but not enough to
call him. I knew where he was, or at least, I had an idea.

Trish called me after he’d showed up at
her house and told her that he was leaving town and moving to New Orleans with
his grandmother. She begged me to call him and I told her I would think about
it, but I never did. He was the one that walked out on me. I had done
everything to stay by his side. I had deposited all my trust in Raven’s bank
and he drained it.

Spent it.

Every single bit of it.

Regardless, I didn’t hate him. I hated
the demons that had successfully won the battle in ripping him from my life.
They were the true enemy, not Raven.

“I am happy, actually.” I giggled. “I’m
going to be going to grad school, working part time in the writing lab and…” I
paused.

“And?”

“Editing for J.S. Christensen.”

“Who’s that?” she gave me a dumbfounded
look.

“Not that you’d know of her, but she’s
an alumna from five years back who’s self-publishing young adult books. I did a
sample edit for her and she hired me to edit her next three books!” I jumped up
and down. “Can you believe it?”

“That’s great!”

A pain hit my side and I stopped. “Oww.”
I limped to the couch and sat down.

“Are you okay?”

“Yeah.” I took a drink of my water. “A
weird pain, that’s all. Anyhow, I can’t believe it.” I propped my feet up on a
box. “Now I’ll have plenty of money to save for a car. But not only that, my
loan was approved.” I picked up one of the envelopes from the coffee table and
waved it at her.

“Sweet.”

When I told Dad my plans, he was excited
for me and offered to pay my tuition, but I refused. I had to do this on my
own. The best thing was we’d been keeping in touch weekly, ever since the
breakup. I guess he was worried about me. Without fail, he continued to urge me
to call my mom, but the last thing I wanted was to hear her nagging voice, especially
after everything that happened. And I definitely didn’t want her to try to hook
me back up with Collin. Those days were over.

“I know.” I smiled.

“Then that means one thing.”

“What’s that?”

“We’re going shopping!” Delaney
scrambled to slip on her flip-flops.

“Shopping?” I yawned as the sudden urge
to take a nap settled over me. “I don’t know, Laney. I’m not up for shopping
today. I think I want to catch up on my sleep.”

“What? Are you crazy?” She reached in
her back pocket. “My dad gave me a budget to go shopping for stuff for the
apartment.”

“That’s great. We can go tomorrow or
something.” I yawned.

“What?” She grabbed her keys and dangled
them in the air. “We only have a few days to get out of here and I already got
the key to the apartment.”

“But we have plenty of time.” I unbuttoned
my jean shorts, wondering what the heck I ate to make me so bloated.

“Please, Lex. I’m eager to get some new
things. Besides, we need furniture.”

“Oh, yeah, forgot about that.” I lowered
my feet to the ground. On a tight budget, my only option was to ask my dad if I
could use my bed and dresser from the house.

“Come on.” She waved the card in front
of me. “I’ll get you a new comforter for your room with matching curtains,
pillows... whatever you want.”

“You mean your dad will.” I pushed her
hand away. “And that’s not right. I’ll just use what I have until I can save up
for a new one.”

“You’re so boring.”

“Whatever,” I laughed. “It’s called being
practical and living within your means.”

“Yeah, those words aren’t in my
vocabulary.” She snickered and pulled me off the couch.

Delaney managed to talk me into going
shopping and our first stop was a furniture store. We perused the rows of sofas
and sectionals, along with dining tables. It didn’t take long to find something
we both liked. If it weren’t for Delaney’s parents, we wouldn’t have any
furniture. We really were fortunate.

Delaney paid for the furniture and
scheduled a delivery for the next day.

“Let’s go to Target.” She smiled as she
pulled onto the road.

“I’m too tired.” I rubbed my back and
adjusted the seat belt. Sitting in the library for the past few days had really
done a number on my muscles. I needed to get to the gym and stretch, or get in a
good workout with Luke. Thinking of it made me cringe. All I wanted to do was
crawl in bed and sleep for a few days.

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