Unremembered (29 page)

And because there’s nothing right here, it can mean only one thing.

The actual destination must be
below
me.

Inside that cavern.

I glance over the side again. The entrance to the cave is about ten feet down. And the opening has a lip that protrudes a few inches from the rest of the canyon wall. If I hang off this edge and
allow myself to drop, I will theoretically end up right on that rim. That’s
if
I can manage to land on the tips of my toes and keep my balance long enough to duck forward into the
cave.

I return the cellphone to my pocket and unclasp the locket from around my neck. I wrap the chain around my arm a few times, until only the smooth black-and-silver heart-shaped emblem is dangling
under my wrist.

As soon as I’m safely on that ledge, I’m going to drop it into the canyon.

Diotech will surely confiscate it if they find it on me and I can’t stand the thought of it in their possession. It’s too valuable.

If I can’t be with Zen, then the locket has no real purpose.

And I’d rather it be at the bottom of this void than in the hands of the people who tore us apart.

I take a deep breath as I drop to my knees and slowly crawl backwards. My left foot finds the edge first, slipping over the side and dangling precariously. I feel for any kind of rock or uneven
surface to use as a foothold but find nothing.

A few pebbles tumble over the side and I wait to hear the sound of them hitting the ground but it never comes.

The canyon is too deep. Even for my ears.

I push my right foot over next, strengthening my grip on the rugged ground. I continue to slither backwards on my stomach until I’m hanging completely over the edge of the canyon wall.

I don’t want to look down but I have to in order to align myself with the opening of the cave so that I can make sure to drop right on to the protruding ledge.

The sight of the infinite abyss below me sends tremors of terror through my body, tensing my muscles and numbing my brain.

I breathe in and out, fighting to maintain my composure.

I only have one chance to make this. I need to stay calm.

With a deep swallow and a large gulp of air, I point my toes, picture Zen’s beautiful brown eyes, and let go.

It feels as though I’m falling forever. In my mind I manage to convince myself that I’ve missed the edge of the cave completely and will be descending until the end of time. Or until
I reach the bottom of this canyon. Whichever comes first.

I also manage to convince myself that, without me, they’ll have no use for Zen. That my death will set him free. And that maybe this wasn’t the worst option in the world.

But then my toes slam against something hard. My eyes focus just in time to see a dark tunnel in front of me and I realize that I’ve landed right where I wanted.

However, I also realize that the acceleration of the fall has knocked me off balance, and I feel myself tipping backwards. My heels dip into nothingness and I thrust my weight forward, fighting
to stay on my toes . . . and on the ledge.

But I must have tried to offset my fall too strongly because while the top half of my body is flung forward, the bottom half is flung back. My legs drop into the void and I feel the rest of me
being dragged down with them.

My chest hits the ground hard, knocking my breath away. I scramble to grab on to something, clawing my nails into the unhelpful scarlet-coloured dirt.

Pop, pop, pop, pop, pop.

One by one, each of my long, shapely fingernails snaps in succession. And now I only have my fingertips to use for traction. But they’re too smooth to grip on to anything.

Gravity is no match even for me. It’s too strong and too relentless. The rough rock beneath me scrapes away the skin on my stomach, chest and forearms. I slip further and further, losing
willpower and hope with each passing second.

Until I have nowhere else to go but down.

I close my eyes and surrender to the pull of the abyss. Once
I stop struggling, I fall much faster. It’s a liberating feeling. My hands, instead of
grappling to hang on to something, slide smoothly and effortlessly through the amber dust.

It’s so easy to simply let gravity take control of my fate, it almost doesn’t seem real.

And who knows, maybe it isn’t.

Maybe this whole thing is just another implanted memory and when I open my eyes I’ll be back on the compound with Zen, telling him stories about our attempted escape into the past.

But I know I’m only kidding myself.

Nothing in my life has felt more real than this moment.

Death is not a memory you can fake.

My hand unexpectedly hooks around the sturdy frame of something smooth and leathery and I’m jolted back into the moment. My fingers instinctively wrap around whatever they just touched and
my fall is halted right as I’m about to disappear over the edge.

My body wrenches to a stop. One hand grips the mysterious object of salvation while the rest of my body dangles precariously above the endless chasm below. I twist and pull until I’m able
to wrap my other hand around the same surface.

I strain my neck to look up until I can finally see what it is that saved me. The smooth, leathery object that I’m hanging on to for life.

It’s the heel of a large black boot.

Attached to an even larger man.

I immediately recognize his harsh blunt features, scarred face and short cropped hair.

He reaches down with one of his massive chapped hands, wraps it around my arm and pulls me up.

He moves fast. And as soon as I’m back on my feet he yanks my arms behind my back and clasps them together with the same thick metal chains they used to detain me in the old, rundown barn.
The ones Rio released me from.

He must not notice the necklace wrapped around my arm or the locket dangling from the underside of my wrist because he doesn’t try to remove it. And I manage to cup the heart-shaped amulet
in my hand, hiding it from view.

I don’t tell him that the chains are pointless. I’m not going to fight. Or run. Despite every fibre in my body screaming for me to.

Perhaps some human emotions are simply stronger than DNA.

Besides, I agreed to be taken. I’m surrendering. And that’s exactly what I came here to do. Resisting would only drag the process out longer.

Once he’s finished securing my arms behind my back, he shoves me forward and we walk into the cave. It goes deeper than I thought and we walk for at least five minutes. Eventually we both
have to duck until we reach what I assume is the centre.

The tunnel opens up into a large roundish room. It’s lit by four blazing torches. The ceiling is dripping with long, icicle-shaped rock formations that hang perilously above me, seemingly
poised to break off and impale someone at the subtlest movement.

Another agent stands in the middle of the chamber. A thinner, darker version of my current escort. I identify him as the man who apprehended me in the barn.

Directly at his feet, sitting on the ground, I see Zen. His hands are also tied behind his back. Nasty cuts and bruises mar his beautiful face and his left cheek is caked in dried blood.

Emotion overtakes me and I try to run to him but I’m forced to a halt when a short middle-aged man with light blond hair, icy blue eyes and smooth tanned skin emerges from the shadows and
places a Modifier inches away from Zen’s temple.

‘Hello, Sera,’ he says, in a deep, unnerving voice that I recognize from the phone call and my nightmares.

‘Alixter,’ I breathe.

‘So you
do
remember me,’ he says, looking pleased. ‘Do you know what this is?’ He gives the Modifier a small flick.

I nod.

‘Good,’ he says icily. ‘Then you won’t come any closer. Because I have it programmed to a setting I like to call scramble. One zap from this and he won’t be of much
use to you any more.’

I get the point and back away. ‘What did you do to him?’ I ask, my voice shaking as I take in his assortment of injuries.

Zen lifts his head and our eyes meet for the first time. I see so much pain in his face but still he manages to flash me that exquisite uneven smile that I love so much.

Alixter shrugs and takes a few steps towards me. ‘Nothing time won’t heal. And a little antiseptic.’ He motions to the ground behind me. ‘Why don’t you take a
seat?’

I drop to my knees and lean back against the rock wall. It feels cool on my sweat-stained shirt.

Alixter nods to the agent who led me in here. ‘Search her,’ he commands.

As the scar-faced man ominously stalks his way over to me, I squeeze the locket in my hand, wishing I had thrown it over the edge when I had the chance.

Now, it appears, Zen’s gift – just like me – will end up in the hands of Diotech.

He grips me by the elbow and starts to yank me back up. I say a sad, silent goodbye to the locket and everything it stood for – eternal love, freedom, escape – and slowly let it
slide from my fingers. It makes a soft
clank
against the stony surface and I pray it will go unnoticed.

The guard reaches into all of my pockets, removing my borrowed cellphone. Zen watches carefully from across the room, his eyes registering panic. He thinks I might still have the drive.

But at least I was smart enough to leave that behind with Maxxer.

When the guard comes up empty-handed, I see Zen relax somewhat.

‘She’s clean,’ he announces to Alixter. ‘Just the cellphone.’ Then he pushes me down to the ground.

‘Gentle,’ Alixter reproaches silkily. ‘Don’t damage the merchandise.’ Then he grins cunningly at me. ‘And I wouldn’t try to break free if I was you. I
know exactly how strong you are. And those chains are customized to your specifications.
Just
out of your reach.’

I glare back at him. The sight of him makes me tremble with fear, but I try not to let it show. ‘I have no intention of escaping,’ I tell him. ‘I came here to fulfill my end of
the agreement.’

‘Ah yes,’ Alixter replies sinuously. ‘Our
agreement
. Of course. But you must understand, it’s hard to trust you, given your –’ he wheels his hand
around in a slow circle – ‘well . . .
history
of insubordination.’

He glances from me to Zen and then back again. ‘Tell me,’ he says, ‘where
were
you two planning to go? Because I
know
it wasn’t here.’

‘Don’t tell him,’ Zen urges me, his voice strained and raspy.

I remain quiet. But not on Zen’s orders. There’s no way I’m telling this man
anything
.

Alixter studies the two of us again. ‘Such solidarity,’ he muses. ‘Right to the end.’ He exhales a long, drawn-out sigh. ‘No matter. Once we get you back to the
lab, we’ll be able to find all the information we need.’ He taps his forehead.

I can feel the three receptors still attached to my head. No doubt, once I get back, they’ll use them – or something similar – to dig out all the memories they want. In fact, I
wouldn’t be surprised if they reset my mind completely. Back to square one.

After I’ve come so far.

The thought makes me shudder.

‘And then,’ Alixter goes on, ‘maybe we can figure out how to fix this little weakness you seem to have.’ He gestures to Zen, who’s so frail and battered he’s
barely able to sit up. ‘It was something we definitely didn’t anticipate.’

Alixter pinches his chin between his thumb and forefinger. ‘You see, when we set out to create you – a perfect genetic specimen with speed, strength, brainpower, beauty, immunity to
disease – we honestly didn’t expect you to have many human characteristics. In fact, we purposefully programmed you to be docile and obedient. With all the brain and gene modifications
we made, our research indicated that you’d behave much like a robot. A willing servant. Incapable of insubordination or feeling much emotion. And certainly incapable of falling in
love
.’

He says the word as though it physically sickens him.

‘But clearly something in our calculations was amiss, because here we are.’ He spreads his arms out wide and chuckles sinisterly. ‘It became most obvious that you weren’t
what we expected you to be when you fled the compound. And then ran from my agents. Instead of coming willingly. That’s when I knew that apprehending you was going to be a bit more complicated
than I had originally hoped.’

He starts to pace, keeping a close eye on me the whole time. ‘I should have realized the truth sooner though. You had a certain zealous spirit about you right from the start. A rebellious
streak. I suppose that’s why Rio always called you Seraphina – meaning “fery one” – instead of the name we gave you.’

As revolting as Alixter’s words are, I still find a peculiar satisfaction in hearing them. At least I
had
a rebellious streak. At least I fought.

‘Of course it wasn’t really a name,’ he muses. ‘It was just an abbreviation for the sequence of DNA that finally took. You see, we had several failed attempts before you
came along. But sequence
E
, recombination
A
was the successful one. S:E/R:A. But like I said, no one really expected you to
need
a name, given your anticipated nature.
But once it was discovered that you were, in fact, quite human, we figured Sera was as good a name as any.’

He stops pacing long enough to run his fingers through his silky white-blond hair.

‘Looking back,’ he continues, ‘we really should have used our resources to create an
adult
. Then maybe I wouldn’t be in this predicament. Teenagers can be so
irresponsible. So reckless and misguided. All because they
think
they’re in
love
.’

His voice suddenly takes on a high-pitched singsongy quality and once again I hear the disgust he infuses in the word.

He stops pacing and approaches me, bending down and coming close enough to my face that I can smell his breath. It nearly makes me gag.

‘We chose sixteen because it’s such a perfect age,’ he says, his voice smooth like glass. He reaches out and hooks a strand of my hair around his finger. ‘When a human
being – especially a woman – is most healthy, visibly striking and physically fit.’ He leans in and inhales the scent of my hair, breathing deeply before letting it fall limp
against my shoulder.