Veiled Dreams (6 page)

‘I think you had better carry on being me,’ said Imigriana after they had finished getting ready. You’ll have to pretend that you still don’t remember. Or at least, only remember on and off. That’ll explain why you don’t know what to do in the prayers. Hide, though. There’s someone coming, and we don’t want them to see you yet!’

Imigriana pushed Christina behind a screen in the corner of the room. The door creaked open. Through a crack between the two panels, Christina saw a tall figure dressed in royal reds and blues.

‘Imigriana!’ Christina shivered. It was Mum’s voice. She moved so that she could see the speaker more clearly. But this lady didn’t look like Mum. Her hair was swirled up round her head into an elegant knot. She was far taller than Mum, and unlike her, she didn’t have a single grey hair on her head. A dozen or so heavy silver and gold bracelets dangled from her wrist. A huge silver comb glistened in her hair. Christina watched as Imigriana and her mother flung their arms around each other.

‘My goodness,’ she thought, ‘I haven’t let my mum do that for years.’

‘Mother, it’s good to be home. And I’m beginning to remember a few more things now. But I’ve forgotten the prayer ritual!’

‘The Prayers? Oh dear!’ The queen looked worried and Christina felt the panic start. This whole day was going to be important.

‘But it won’t matter,’ Imigriana continued. ‘Oh Mother, I’ve found a new companion. Christina. She looked after me when I
was lost. And we could be twins. She can stay, can’t she?’

Queen Benelov stroked Imigriana’s hair and smiled.

‘I’m sure she can. Everyone will understand about the prayers. Will Christina know the Prayer Ritual?’

‘Of course.’

‘Then, you can follow what she does. Hurry now. The Silence begins in fifteen minutes. We can breakfast together. At least we can see Christina even if we can’t speak to her.’

Imigriana curtsied. Queen Benelov nodded her head slightly, swished round on her heels and marched smartly out of the room. Lydia’s lips were tight and she was frowning as she followed the queen out.

‘Thank goodness for the Silence! It will save a lot of questions. Now, help me get this dress on. And we must wear prayer veils. Now let me see – ah here we are. And a prayer book. …Yes, we won’t arrive a minute before the Silence begins. And it’s okay to move your veil in front of His Majesty so that you can eat, because the king is allowed to see anyone. But don’t worry if he keeps looking away from you – oh it’ll be me he looks away from – because it embarrasses him to look at young girls without their veils.’

Imigriana was rushing around from the wardrobe, to the chair and back again. Christina joined in the panic and ran around with her, but she didn’t know what she was looking for or what she was trying to do. Both girls giggled. But there was an ache and a fluttering in Christina’s stomach. Something strange was going to happen. And she didn’t know whether to be excited or scared.

‘We’ll wait for the Silence gong,’ said Imigriana, ‘and then we’ll go to the patio. We always have breakfast on the patio on Prayer Days.’ Imigriana suddenly grabbed Christina’s hands. ‘Oh, we’ll have such a great time – once this day is over.’

The gong boomed. Imigriana put her finger to her lips, smiled and shrugged her shoulders. She gestured to Christina to follow
her. The two girls made their way through complicated twists and turns in the corridors, until they came to an archway, which led out to a bright patio. A crisp white cloth covered the table which was laden with inviting breads, fruit and cold meat. Christina felt too nervous to eat, though. Queen Benelov and King Tutoralph were already sitting at the table. The king motioned the two girls to sit down. Imigriana curtsied deeply. Christina wasn’t sure whether she should or not. Before she had time to think about it too much, the king came over to her, smiled, stroked her hair affectionately, and held out the chair for her to sit down. Imigriana emerged from her curtsy. Queen Benelov smiled at her, touched her arm gently and with her eyes indicated that Imigriana should sit down.

So, the formalities were over. The queen handed round the plates of meat, the bowls of pureed fruit and yogurt and the baskets full of bread. Christina was still a little too nervous to eat much, but she did manage to swallow two bowlfuls of the yogurt, which was richer and creamier than the ones she used to eat at home. She noticed that Imigriana always waited until the king and queen had both begun to eat before she started.

Imigriana’s parents seemed quite kind, Christina thought. And King Tutoralph looked very young for his age and quite handsome. He too had no grey hairs, though there were a few creases on his forehead. They just made him look wiser. His deep brown eyes laughed all the time.

Another gong sounded. Christina followed the others as they folded their napkins. They made their way to a wide open courtyard, where already masses of men, women and children were kneeling with their arms spread in front of them and their foreheads touching the ground. The king and queen did the same. Imigriana nodded to Christina to kneel, and then knelt herself.

This is going to be a bundle of laughs
, thought Christina. But she was surprised to find that she felt a lot more comfortable that she
would have guessed in this strange position. It was really rather relaxing.

‘We start the prayer of the East!’ boomed the loudspeaker. The crowd started mumbling and making odd gestures with their hands. Christina tried her best to follow the movements and moved her lips up and down to make it look as if she was saying the prayer.

I wish I could understand what was going on
, she thought.

‘It is really the prayer of the beginning of the day,’ said a voice in her head. Mona!

‘See the sky lighten, and how the golden sun slips above the horizon. Hear the birds sing, and see the buds opening on the spring shrubs. Greet the great stag, the king of the morning beasts. Take your shimmering sword and honour the king. Feel the fine morning air on your cheeks. Put back your sword and take your great bow and arrow. Draw back the string and send the arrow after your dream. And now feel the morning breezes chasing away old and defeating thoughts. Give yourself to the power of the East.’

Mona’s voice faded. Christina was no longer in the dusty courtyard. She was alone. The great stag stared at her, then blinked and moved away. The sword was heavy now and she was glad to put it away. The string of the bow twanged as the arrow made its way in a straight line through the air. She shivered as it landed. That spot had something to do with her purpose here. The breeze, which until now had gently moved her hair, turned into a strong wind. As it tugged at her clothes she knew the spoiled parts of the past were being carried away from her.

The voice of the loud speaker brought Christina abruptly back to the courtyard.

‘Now we shall take the Sumat.’

The prayers sat up. Christina carefully crossed her legs as the others had done. Servants in plain prayer dresses carried trays filled with glasses of fruit juice. Everyone drank in silence.

‘Now we shall pray to the South,’ boomed the loud speaker.

‘The great horseman of the south will bring life to all,’ Mona’s voice carefully explained. ‘Honour him and feel his power.’

This time Christina found herself sitting on a white horse. Her own clothes were very thin, almost transparent. This was as well, as the sun was high in the sky and very hot. She was surprised to see the moon shining at the same time. She felt the sun pumping life into her and into all the plants and animals around her. The horse moved slowly forward. She felt the energy rising in her body, starting from the bottom of her spine. She held a stick in her hand. She used it as a pen to draw a great five-pointed star in the air in front of her.

After this prayer, they were served a bowl of rice and vegetables and given water to drink. Next came the prayer to the West. Now she was in a forest in autumn. The trees were full of ripe nuts and leaves of gold and red. The sun was beginning to set, and she could already see a very bright star. She was walking down a hill, to a lake, which reflected the pink of the sunset. A narrow path led up to the hills on the other side. A large black and white cow was making its way down the lake, and arrived at the same time as Christina. The cow slowly changed its shape. Now Christina saw a tall man with flowing blond waves and piercing blue eyes. He too wore a type of prayer dress and a cape of silver feathers. He held the Queen’s Chalice out to Christina.

‘You may ask one question,’ he said.

‘Why have I been brought to Ixeria?’

‘Your purpose is two-fold. It is to learn for your own growth and also to restore the Law of Ixeria. The chalice is central to the purpose. It will not be easy, but we shall all be with you.’

Then he was gone and she was back in the courtyard, where the servants were bringing more glasses of fruit juice.

The prayer to the North was to be the last, Mona explained. Now Christina was beneath a black, star-covered sky. She held a large circular mirror in her hands, which reflected the light of the
stars back up to the sky. The light streamed upwards like a film of sliver dust, and it was as if she could read the message the stars gave, though she could not put it into words. The she turned the mirror to herself. She saw not only the reflection of a young girl in a prayer dress, but she understood herself completely for a few seconds. She could see into her own soul, her own deep spirit. She knew the very essence of herself. Then the new knowledge was gone. She became aware of a small fairy creature near to her. He was almost transparent and held out to her a large white crystal. Christina was now in a cave. Light shone from the floor, which was covered with crystals of all shapes and colours. She felt protected and as if she belonged to the earth. She took the gift from the little nymph and felt the wisdom offered.

The prayers were over. Imigriana touched her arm gently and led her back to their apartments. A gong sounded just as they arrived.

‘Now we may speak,’ said Imigriana. ‘That is all over for now! It never turns out as bad as I expected.’ Her eyes became very serious. ‘In fact it’s really important, I suppose. What did you think?’

‘Well…interesting.’

‘Did the angel of the West give you a satisfactory answer to your question?’

Christina nodded.

‘And did the nymph of the North bring a useful gift?’

Christina nodded again.

‘And of course the wind of the East always cleanses and the sun of the South always gives energy. But it just seems like a load of old rubbish to me and yet…’

Christina found she had a terrible headache. She didn’t want to join the family dinner. A room had been set up for her quite close to Imigriana’s. She decided to go to bed straight away. Imigriana agreed to carry on pretending to be her. But although she was very tired, she couldn’t sleep straight away. It had all
been rather astonishing though she was a little clearer about why she was here. And she felt somehow – well – healed by the whole process. But it was still all very confusing and all of a sudden she was missing her family very much. Very much indeed.

Jan’s hands were shaking as he put the phone down. He could hardly take in what Paul had just told him. That Christina had been in some sort of accident. Had she had another seizure – a bad one this time? It was just so stupid that it had taken them so long to try to sort this out. Should he have tried harder? Could he have tried harder? He didn’t think he could. He must go to see her. He tried to remember Paul’s exact words. It was no good. He couldn’t

Perhaps Paul didn’t know so much anyway. It must have only just happened. He would go to the hospital. He didn’t care what her parents thought. He had to be there. He had to find out for himself.

He would set off now. Should he take the bike? He was shaking so much he was not sure that was a good idea. But the tram would take forever, and he would have to wait for a cab. No, the bike was the best option. He grabbed his helmet, hoping that that stupid bitch who’d caused so much trouble between them would not be hanging around on the steps again.

She wasn’t – probably too cold and wet – and the churning in his stomach slowed a little.

Soon he was weaving his way through the traffic. The rush hour had started and the narrow streets in the old part of town were crowded. Still, at least he could get the bike through gaps a cab would never get through. The tram would he been much too slow at this time of night, with all the people getting on and off.

Even so, and although it actually only took ten minutes to get to where the road widened out and led to the modern hospital not so very far from Christina’s school, it was too much for Jan.

‘Shit,’ he spat, as the traffic light, which would let him on to
the boulevard went red. He revved the engine hard several times, as if that would make the lights change quicker. A police car pulled up beside him. Jan saw the officer about to get out. There was a law about making that sort of noise in residential areas. The last thing he needed right now was a conversation with the law and possibly a fine as well. He held up his arms in surrender. The police officer nodded sternly.

The lights changed, and Jan was able to swing on to the wider road. The police car followed him. Better keep to the speed limit then. It was just as well really, the way he felt, he would have gone so fast he would have probably caused another accident. Concentrating on his speed and the police car behind him did at least help to keep his mind off worrying about Christina.

The lights of the hospital came into view. He drove into the car park. There was no more room in the places reserved for motorbikes.

‘Shit!’ he said again. Damn. He would just have to park in a car space and at best earn a fine, at worst have his bike clamped or taken away. He didn’t care. At least he could deal with that later, after he had found out what had happened to her.

Baby, what are you doing to me?
He thought to himself, as he walked over to the main entrance.
Please be all right. I love you
,
baby
.

The hospital was strangely quiet inside. He thought there would have been more people there, perhaps visiting on their way home from work. The reception desk was completely unmanned, the computer was still switched on and a pair of spectacles lay abandoned on a pile of papers.

‘Come on, come on,’ muttered Jan. ‘Where is everyone?’ He noticed the bell on the desk. He rang it three or four times. ‘Hello, anyone there?’ he shouted.

Eventually a woman in her fifties with greying hair and a worried look on her face came by.

‘Can I help you?’ she asked.

‘I’ve come to see Christina Grant,’ said Jan. ‘She came in about forty minutes ago, I think.’

The woman tapped on her keyboard and then looked at her screen.

‘Oh,’ she said. She frowned and looked concerned.

‘May I ask,’ she started, ‘are you a relative?’

‘I’m her boyfriend,’ said Jan.

‘Oh, I guess it’ll be all right,’ she said. ‘It’s relatives only, you see. But boyfriend – yes. Relative – sort of, I suppose.’ She smiled weakly at him. ‘Fifth floor, Block A, Elderflower Ward.’

‘Is she very badly hurt, then?’ asked Jan.

‘I’m really in no position to comment,’ said the woman. ‘You’ll have to talk to the people up there, I’m afraid.’

But Jan could see it in her face. Whatever had happened to Christina was very bad indeed.

‘Go through the double doors and turn left towards the lifts,’ said the woman, without looking at him.

Jan all but ran along the corridor. There were several people waiting, and the lifts seemed to be stopping on very floor. He probably wouldn’t be able to get on the first one. He decided to go up the stairs instead, taking them two at a time. He was breathless by the time he got to the top. The lift arrived at the same time as he did.

He followed the sign to Block A, and then Elderflower Ward. How would he be able to find her? There was another sort of reception area in the corner where two corridors met. Then he saw her name written on the whiteboard. Room 5. Which way did these rooms go?

He saw the number 1 on a door just in front of him. 2 was on the next one. He realised he needed to follow the corridor round that way. Round another corner, 3, 4, there it was Room 5. The door opened just as he got there. A woman with cropped red hair and a tall man came out, followed by a teenage boy. Jan recognised the boy – Paul. So the others must be Mr and Mrs Grant.
He’d not seem them close to before.

All three of them were pale. Paul was frowning. Mr Grant’s face was completely without expression and he seemed to be looking into the distance beyond Jan. Mrs Grant was clenching her fists. There were streaks in her make-up and black blotches around her eyes. She must have been crying. Now she was just staring ahead, not seeming to see anything. So it was not good news.

Paul’s pupils opened a little wider as he recognised Jan. He half smiled.

‘Oh, you made it then?’ he said. ‘Good.’

Good seemed an odd thing to say. But perhaps it at least meant that Paul was glad he had come.

Mrs Grant suddenly woke up out of her daydream.

‘You!’ she cried. ‘What the hell do you think you are doing here? You keep away from my daughter. It’s probably your fault she’s here in the first place.’

Jan thought she was actually going to hit him.

A nurse came over to them.

‘Please can you keep the noise down,’ she said. ‘There are some very ill people here and they need peace and quiet.’

‘I just don’t want him going anywhere near my daughter!’ shouted Mrs Grant. Her face was bright red now.

‘Mrs Grant, please, I must insist that you calm down or I shall have to ask you to leave.’

‘It’s all right,’ said Mr Grant. ‘We were going anyway. They don’t want us here at the moment.’ He shook his head at Jan.

Paul shrugged his shoulders and half smiled again.

Jan watched them slowly make their way along the corridor. Mr Grant supported his wife with an arm around her waist. She was leaning into him. Paul was dragging his feet along the floor and looking down.

The nurse who had dealt with the commotion had now returned to her work. She had forgotten all about Jan. He
couldn’t move. He stood absolutely still and it was almost as if no one could see him, as if he had become a ghost. He could hear people talking in Christina’s room, but he couldn’t hear what they were saying.

The door opened. A young doctor and two nurses came out.

‘Oh!’ said the doctor. He seemed surprised. ‘I thought the family had all gone.’

Jan could not speak.

‘So you are…?’

‘I’m her boyfriend,’ Jan managed to say. ‘And they don’t want me there. But could you just tell me how she is.’

‘Well, I, um. I should really only talk to the next of kin…’ said the doctor. ‘But actually—’

‘I love her. I wouldn’t hurt her. I just need to know if she’s going to be okay,’ Jan blurted out.
Where did that come from?
he thought.

The small dark-haired nurse, who was still standing there with the tall blonde one, probably waiting for instructions, nudged the doctor.

‘Go on,’ she said. ‘You can’t not tell him. That’s so romantic.’

‘Anyway, wouldn’t it be good if we got someone in there straight away to start talking to her?’ the tall blond one chipped in.

‘Yes, yes, it would, most definitely,’ said the doctor. He hesitated than sighed. ‘I probably shouldn’t be telling you this, so I’m relying on you to be discreet,’ he said to Jan. ‘She is stable now, but she is in quite a deep coma. She had a really hard blow to the head. It will all be made more complicated by her epilepsy and this may make the epilepsy worse. Talking to coma patients is always a good option and if we can bring her back to us in the next few days, her chances of making a full recovery will be significantly higher.’ He pursed his lips and raised his eyebrows at Jan. ‘Only we’d better be very careful about when you see her. We mustn’t upset her relatives. It’s hard enough for them as it is.’

‘You mean you’re going to let me see her?’ asked Jan. His heart started racing and his mouth went dry.

‘Yes, of course, brilliant idea,’ said the tall blonde nurse.

‘We’ll make sure it’s all properly arranged,’ said the short dark one, at the same time propelling Jan towards the room as she pushed the doctor away from it. ‘And that he’s never here at the same time as her family. Come on, young man, she needs you.’

There was still a nurse in the room with Christina. She was adjusting the bag of fluid, which was attached to Christina’s arm. She didn’t see Jan at first.

‘There now,’ she said to Christina. ‘You should be more comfortable now that you’re all cleaned up and we have some fluids in you.’ She went to pick up a bowl that was on a small table next to the bed. Then she saw him and she jumped,

‘I’m sorry,’ whispered Jan.

‘Not at all, not at all,’ said the nurse waving Jan closer. ‘Come on in. She could do with some company.’

Jan walked slowly over to the bed. He dreaded looking at her actually.

‘Brother?’ asked the nurse.

Jan shook his head.

‘Oh, boyfriend,’ she said. ‘Come on. Don’t be afraid.’

Christina looked so small in the enormous bed surrounded by all the machines, which were whirring and bleeping.

‘She’s peaceful now,’ said the nurse. ‘She’s not in any pain. You must talk to her. And it’s all right to touch her too. Just be careful you don’t pull any of the wires off her.’ She pulled up a chair for him to sit on.

Jan stared at Christina. The nurse was right. She did look peaceful. He had the impression that she was almost smiling, as if she was dreaming, away somewhere else in another world.

‘Will she be like this long?’ he managed to ask the nurse.

‘There’s no way of telling,’ relied the nurse. ‘But we’re sure it
helps if people talk to her. So talk to her. And touch her.’

Jan couldn’t move. He couldn’t think what to say.

‘Look, I’m going to leave you two together for a while,’ said the nurse. I’ll only be in the storeroom next door. Just press the bell if you need me. She’ll be fine for a while.’ The nurse touched his arm and smiled. ‘With such a fine young man to look after her.’

He heard the nurse go out of the room and close the door behind her.

‘Christina,’ he whispered. Tentatively he put out his arm and stroked her hair. It was as soft and bouncy as usual. Then he touched the side of her face with his hand. It was as warm and soft as if she had just woken up from a long sleep. Her cheeks were even a little pink. She looked like a sleeping princess. If only he could wake her up with a kiss, like in the fairy story.

‘Christina,’ he said again, more loudly. ‘Please come back to me.’