Victorious (9 page)

“That means,” he says softly, looking at me as he speaks, “that you can get out of this at any time without endangering other more important agreements already in place between us.”

“Thank you for that. It’s incredibly sweet of you to know I’d need that assurance.”

“You always have an out, sweetheart, whether it’s through safe words or deciding the whole thing isn’t for you or that your limits have changed. Despite how it may appear, you’re the one who’s actually in charge here.”

“I like that,” I say, giving him a sassy grin.
 

His low growl makes me laugh. “I’m going to like paddling that sweet ass when you get mouthy with me.”

“Maybe I’ll get mouthy with you
just so
you’ll paddle my ass.”

“
Fuck
, Nat,” he says, the breath escaping from him on a long hiss. “You have no idea what you do to me when you say things like that, when you play along with me. You’re my perfect match in every possible way.” He reaches for me and brings me close enough to kiss. “I have a feeling you’re going to make for a spectacular sub.”

“I want to be the best sub you’ve ever had.”

“You already are, my love. Just by talking to me about this, by reading the contract and considering all of it without judging me or deciding something has to be wrong with me to want this stuff... You’re perfect.”

I sign my name on the line Flynn has drawn for me under the paragraph he added. It is the first time I write the words Natalie Godfrey, and it gives me a thrill to see my new name in black and white.
 

Judging by his wide smile, Flynn likes it, too.

“So what happens now?” I ask him, tingling with anticipation.

“Now, I want to talk about your job and what we’re going to do about it.”

Chapter 5

I can tell I’ve taken her by surprise with my reply. She thought I’d want to get right down to business now that we’ve hammered out the details. There’s another detail that has to be seen to before we play, but I’ll address that after we talk about her job.

“I thought you’d want to… you know, now that we’ve agreed to everything…”

“Are you in a rush?” I ask with a teasing smile intended to put her at ease.

“No, well… I’m curious, I guess.”

Her curiosity is a huge turn-on for me. That she’s interested and willing to try… I can’t think about that right now when other decisions need to be made. “We’ll get there, but we have other things to talk about, such as your job and your visit with Candace. How was it to see her again after all these years?”

“It was like no time had gone by. We picked up right where we left off. And then Livvy FaceTimed us, so we all got to be together.” Her eyes sparkle with joy as she talks about her long-lost sisters. “They’re so grown up and fun and beautiful.”

“Of course they are. They’re related to you, aren’t they?”

She smiles at the compliment. “I missed so much with both of them, but we’ve promised to stay in close touch from now on. Livvy says she can visit next month when she has a long weekend.”

“We’ll set that up. You’ll see her soon.”

“We had fun at the hotel.”

“I hope you ran up a big room-service tab.”

“We sure did. Candace said if you were making us stay there and paying the bill, we ought to take full advantage.”

Laughing, I say, “I can see I need to be concerned about these new sisters-in-law of mine. They sound like characters.”

“They’re great girls, and they’re looking forward to meeting you. You’ll love them.”

“I have no doubt.” I take her by the hand. “Let’s go get comfy.” We carry our wineglasses and the nearly empty bottle to the sofa. When we’re snuggled under a warm blanket and Natalie is curled up in my arms, I rub my lips over her hair. “Talk to me about the job, Nat.”

She leads with a deep sigh. “I’d love to go back to my class and finish out the school year, but I don’t think I can.”

“Why do you say that?”

“The school announced that they’d offered my job back, and now my apartment, your place, the school… We’re overrun, and there’s a freaking blizzard going on. And they’re
still
staked out. For a while, when we were waiting to hear what would happen, I really thought I could go back if they asked me to and things would return to normal. But after the interview with Carolyn and the SAG Awards, I realized my normal has changed, and there’s no going back to who I was before I became your wife.”

Her words are like a spike to my heart, reminding me that while my life has changed for the better since we met, hers has been tipped upside down. “I’m so sorry, sweetheart.”

“Please don’t be sorry. It’s not your fault. I knew what I was getting into when I took you on. Well, I mostly knew…”

A laugh rumbles through me. I’m glad she can joke about the thing that nearly ruined us. I started this day wondering if I’d ever see her again, and now anything is possible.
 

“I’m mostly afraid that if I go back, things will get crazy again with the paparazzi surrounding the school, and the board will regret asking me back. If that happens and I have to leave again… I can’t do that to my kids, as much as I miss them and want to be with them. I can’t jerk them around like that.”

“I wish you could have everything you want and have me, too. Remember when we first met, and I tried to describe the downside to celebrity? This is it.”

“There’s something else…”

“What’s that?”

“The foundation. Ever since you asked me to be part of that, it’s all I seem to think about when I’m not thinking about you and everything that’s happened with us. I’m so excited to be involved with such a worthwhile cause, and as much as I wish I could return to my classroom, being part of the effort to address childhood hunger in this country is so exciting.”

“You have no idea how happy it makes me to hear you say that. I knew I was asking the right person to head up this effort. You should also know that my management team has been overrun with inquiries as to whether you’re interested in modeling, acting and a wide variety of other offers, including interview requests from every major name you can think of.”

“No way.”

“Yes way. I told you you’d be in hot demand after the interview with Carolyn.”

“Wow. They really want me to
model
? What do I know about that?”

“They love your look, and I can’t say I blame them. I do, too. I can have my manager, Danielle, send over the most interesting offers, and you can take a look.”

“I don’t know about that, Flynn. Show business is your thing, not mine.”

I shrug. “It can be your business, too, if that’s what you want. You don’t have to decide anything right away. Focus on the foundation for now, and see what happens.”

“I suppose I could do that. It’s so weird that people know who I am and are interested in me. That’s going to take some getting used to.”

“You’ve got the rest of your life to get used to it. Take all the time you need.” I kiss her forehead and then her cheek. “Is it okay to say that I’m thrilled and relieved that we won’t be spending any time on opposite coasts?”

“It’s okay to say that,” she says with a smile. “I’m relieved, too.”

“So you’re going to tell the school you’re declining their offer to return?”

Nodding, she says, “I’ll write to each of my students and explain why I’m not coming back and give them our address so they can write to me. That would be okay, wouldn’t it?”

“We can’t give out our actual address, but I have a PO box you can use.”

“That’ll work.” She eyes me with excitement and anticipation. “So does this mean I’m officially moving to LA?”

“Eventually. In case you haven’t noticed, we’re somewhat snowed in for the time being.” I nod to the windows, where the driving snow is highlighted by the orange glow of security lights from an adjacent building. “We’re not going anywhere for the next day or two.”

She runs her finger up the inside of my thigh, sparking an immediate reaction. “Whatever will we do with all that time?”

“Well, I’ve got that drawer full of movies and the tub you love so much.”

Turning so she can see me, she takes a good long look to gauge whether I’m serious. “I’ll admit to being confused.”

“I’ll admit to being incredibly aroused by the fact that you’re so eager to proceed with our plans. I can’t fucking wait to play with you. But before we do that, we need to talk to someone about whether it’s a good idea in light of what you’ve been through in the past.”

“I’m fine, Flynn. I talked to Doctor Bancroft last week.”

This is news to me. “You didn’t know the full picture last week.”

“But still, we talked about sex… and everything.”

I would give everything I have to know how that conversation went down. “You talked about kinky sex? About dominance and submission and everything that goes with those things?”

“Well, no, but—”

“No buts, sweetheart. We have to be certain it won’t set you back before we try it.
I
have to be certain of that. We need to see your Doctor Bancroft or someone else who specializes in PTSD and sexual assault counseling.”

“He does both those things, which is why the court sent me to him.”

“You’re already familiar with him, so I’d be fine with talking to him.”

She glances up at me, seeming to gauge my sincerity. “You’re very… private… about this part of your life, so private you didn’t even tell me. You’re really willing to talk to a stranger about it?”

“If it means being confident that you can truly handle what we’re considering, then yes, I’ll do it in a heartbeat. We’ve got to figure that we’ve met our quota of disreputable professionals for this lifetime with Rogers.”

“True. I know Curt very well. We can trust him. He saved my life, Flynn. There’s no way I’d be sitting here talking to you, capable of this relationship, without him.”

“Then I owe him a tremendous debt of gratitude. Will you reach out to him and set up a time when we can talk to him?”

“Yes, I will, and thank you for being so concerned about me.”

“I’m very concerned about you.”

“I’ll text Curt now and see if he can talk to us tomorrow.”

I love that she wants to get on with our plans, that she’s curious and interested rather than turned off and appalled. That makes her as different from my first wife as it’s possible to get, but I already knew Natalie is made of much stronger stuff than Valerie could dream of being. Valerie… I need to do something about the trouble she caused between Natalie and me. I’ll take care of that when I get back to LA. In the meantime, I take advantage of Natalie going to get her phone to look at mine for the first time in a while.

A message from Liza catches my attention.
Pictures of Natalie arriving at LaGuardia cropping up online. You won’t like them. Will send pics in next message if you want to see.

“Son of a bitch,” I whisper as I scroll through the pictures of her looking cornered, frightened and very small next to the hulking men on either side of her. I begin to wonder how I’ll ever let her out of my sight again. The thought of my precious love being afraid or surrounded makes me twitchy.
 

“What’s wrong?” she asks when she rejoins me on the sofa, pulling the blanket back up over us.