Virtue of a Governess (33 page)

Lombard leaned against the cart, humour lurking in his eyes. “I’d like to see the mighty Nat West be brought under control by his mother. He’s too sure of himself by far.”

Silvana stiffened. “Are you willing to help me in this or not? Because if you think this is some joke—”

His expression changed, became serious. “You want me to get rid of Nicola West. That is far from being a joke.”

“Are you able to do such a thing without making a mistake?” She lowered her voice. “There are to be no traces left behind.”

“There won’t be.”

“It happened last time. Nat is after your blood over that stabbing.”

He leaned in closer to her, a look of evilness in his eyes. Despite herself, she took a step back. “That was just a warning. I assure you, Madam, this time it will be perfect.”

I thought when you were with child you put weight on, not take it off?” Florence laughed, bending to wipe the last desk in the row.

“Yes, I believe so.” Nicola forced a smile, hiding her true emotions. She finished stacking books on the shelf on the far wall of the schoolroom and turned to survey their work.

Three neat rows of desks and chairs waited for children to occupy them. The chalkboard was in place behind the main desk at the front, the floorboards were swept, the two windows cleaned and the little black stove was shining and filled with kindling ready to be lit. Finally the schoolroom was ready to be used after weather delays, setbacks in the building of it and the government’s hindrance in allowing them to be recognised as an official place of learning. However, tomorrow the orphaned children, now numbering twelve, would begin lessons, as well as any children from the surrounding streets.

“What is it?” Florence had closed the gap between them. “You’ve been quiet for weeks now, much quieter than your normal self. Everyone has mentioned it.”

“Would you prefer I didn’t come here so much then?” She smiled through her misery. Outside the orphaned children played, their laughter drifting through to them.

“Don’t talk nonsense. We are all happy that you spend so much time with us. Your efforts in the last month have really made a difference with the agency. Why half a dozen women have arrived here and left just as quickly with situations secured. None of that would have been possible without your energies and commitment.”

“I like my work here.”

“But there’s something more, isn’t there?” Florence’s concern touched Nicola deeply. “You haven’t been your usual self. I declare I haven’t heard you laugh for at least two months.”

Laugh? Nicola couldn’t remember the last time she laughed. “I’m sure you are exaggerating.”

“You are pale and your eyes look troubled, Nicola. I’m not the only one who sees this.”

Except my husband.

Nicola squeezed Florence’s hand and moved down the row of desks. “I am perfectly well.”

“Do you think you can fool me? I know you too well. We’ve shared the same house and worked too closely not to. I know all of your moods and emotions now.” Florence pulled out two of the chairs. “Come and sit a while. You have worry lines on your face that weren’t there a couple of months ago. You may have a bit of a stomach now, but your arms and shoulders show a thinness that’s not natural. Why aren’t you eating properly? Come, talk to me.”

Sighing, feeling heavy and cumbersome in her eighth month of pregnancy, Nicola lowered herself onto the small chair. “There really isn’t anything to talk about.” But even as she spoke, her chin wobbled. Suddenly, she was stifling the sobs that had been building for months.

Florence held her close, rubbing her back in long smooth strokes. “Unburden yourself, I insist. You know it’ll go no further.”

Sniffling and rummaging in her skirt pockets for a handkerchief, she tried to stem the flow of tears, but they seemed unstoppable now she’d finally given in to the release. “I don’t know how to speak of it.”

“Start at the beginning. That’s usually the best place.”

“My mother-in-law, Silvana, detests me.” Nicola twisted the handkerchief in her fingers. “I wouldn’t mind that so much, for I do not like her either, but you see, she hides her hatred under a coating of false smiles and kind words. She has captured Nathaniel and Frances in her spell. In front of them she is a devoted loving mother, one they have never had before, so of course they are so happy to receive such attention.”

“And you canna tell them how she treats you?”

“No. I see their pleasure and cannot ruin it for them. Though I know Silvana is only acting in that regard, too.” A ragged sigh escaped her. “I have tried to cope, but she is becoming more spiteful to me every day. She is also very clever and is never caught doing it. She waits for them to leave the house and then she starts on me.”

“That is why you are spending all your days here.”

Nicola nodded. “She monopolises Nathaniel and Frances’s time and I cannot bear to be in her company. So I come here to work, to forget her until it is dark and I must return home. Yet, I use my condition as an excuse and stay home when they go out to the theatre or to a function.”

“Oh, Nicola.”

“I should have seen this coming from that very first day.”

“Can you not speak about this to your husband?”

“No. It would break his heart. I won’t do it to him. He’s finally getting the love from his mother that he’s been waiting his whole life. Frances is the same. Her relationship with Silvana is growing and Frances is amazed that her mother is showing interest in her charity work. Silvana even worked at the soup kitchen the other day! How could I take all that from them?”

“But doesn’t Mr West see the difference in you, as I do?”

Nicola smiled lovingly. “I allow him to think the baby is taking all my energy. You must understand, Nathaniel is not himself lately. His mother’s attentions have surprised him in a way he never expected, plus he is to be a father. All of these changes have altered our lives. Besides, we never seem to have a minute alone lately.”

“When does she leave to sail home?”

“She won’t decide on a date. Last night at dinner she hinted that she might go in the New Year. How can I bear another four months of her company?”

“Well, I know one thing. Tonight you will stay here with us. I’ll send a note to your home and tell them we are having a meeting or something and you’ll be back in the morning.”

Nicola stood, her back aching from the uncomfortable chair. “No, it is impossible. Thank you though, for caring.”

“You mustn’t let this continue, Nicola. You’ll become ill and you need your strength for the birth.”

Taking a deep breath, she shrugged. “I cannot eat at the same table as her.”

“Come into the house, we’ll have luncheon and you will eat it all. Mrs Nesbit hasn’t been drunk for a month now and is cooking up a storm. Yesterday, she baked two dozen macaroons for the children, despite her yelling every five minutes that they are under her feet and she’ll take a horsewhip to them.” Florence gave an exaggerated wink and slipped her hand through Nicola’s arm as they walked outside. “Perhaps we’ll take the horsewhip to your mother-in-law instead.”

Leaving the schoolroom, Nicola smiled at Miss Barker and the children playing. They seemed happy and she knew they were well cared for. Hopefully they would grow to be good people. When she looked up towards the house she saw Mr Belfroy walking slowly down towards her. “I didn’t think you were calling by today, Mr Belfroy.” Her smile disappeared on seeing his troubled face, an expression she knew all too well. “What is it?”

“Ah, Mrs West, Miss Florence.” He tipped his hat to them as the drizzly rain started. They hurried back up the slope through the trees. Behind them, Miss Barker called the children into the dormitory.

Inside, Nicola shook the raindrops from her skirt. “You shouldn’t be out in such weather, Mr Belfroy.”

“It wasn’t raining this morning when I started out, and I’m glad I did venture outdoors today as I found a dear lady in need of our help.”

“Oh?” Nicola gestured into the study and followed him in with Florence. “Where did you find her?”

“She’s recently arrived from New Zealand, but has had severe misfortunes in both that country and this. Her name is Jane Percival.” Mr Belfroy creaked onto a chair by the small glowing fire. “I found her walking down Macquarie Street, the look of her was the first clue to her dilemma. She had the worn face of a lady who has endured too much. I watched her for a while. She was looking in shop windows and reading the little cards on display, you know the type that list rooms to let or positions offered. I spoke to her about them and she told me of her need for employment.”

“Why didn’t you bring her with you?”

“She wouldn’t take my assurances that I meant her no harm. I believe she has been mistreated dreadfully in the past.” He leaned on his cane placed between his knees. “I told her to wait at her lodgings and I’d fetch you to her.”

“I’ll get my cloak.”

“Nicola,” Florence stepped forward, her eyes full of meaning, “perhaps I should go?”

“No, thank you, Florence. I’ll do it. I need to have something to do or go mad.”

“Very well. I’ll organise a bed for Miss Percival and food for you on your return.”

In the hall, as they readied to leave, Miss Hunt, a newly arrived governess came out of the parlour, her face glowing with joy. “Oh, Mr Belfroy, Mrs West, Miss McIntyre, you’ll never guess my news.”

“Happy news I gather?” Florence asked, helping Nicola with her cloak.

“Why yes, I’ve been appointed as a companion to Mrs Carlisle, who is returning to England a fortnight tomorrow.”

“Are you pleased to be sailing to England, Miss Hunt?” Nicola asked, pulling on her gloves.

“Yes, very much so. I never thought I would, but I feel my luck has run out in this country. I’ve managed to pay back my debt to Miss Rye’s Society and am now free to do as I please.”

“Then I’m happy for you.” Nicola patted the younger woman’s shoulder. “We’ll have a celebration meal next week for you.”

Once in the carriage, Nicola leaned against the seat, grimacing as her back ached. How she wished Silvana was also returning to England in a fortnight.

* * * 

“As fast as you can, Timms.” Nat called up to the driver as he opened the carriage door and climbed in after Frances. Once they were seated, the carriage lurched forward on its way to George Street.

“Why the rush, Nat?” Frances scowled, adjusting her hat. “My appointment at the dressmakers isn’t until one. I thought we could share a meal somewhere. I’ve been at the soup kitchen all morning and am famished.”

“I’ve business to deal with. I’ll have to drop you off, I’m sorry.”

“Well thank you for stopping to collect me. I didn’t want to be caught in the rain.”

He reclined against the seat and stared out the window at the passing traffic and buildings. A light rain fell from low grey clouds. The dismal day suited his mood and the errand he was on. A note had been passed into his hands this morning concerning Lombard. The stupid fool had surfaced again at one of the gentlemen’s clubs last night. Nat’s gut clenched at the thought of getting hold of his one time friend.

“Nat?”

“Hmm?” He turned to Frances, his mind full of Lombard.

“I wanted to talk to you about Nicola.”

“Oh?” His thoughts turned to his darling wife and he frowned. Lately she seemed out of sorts, but he put it down to the pregnancy. She was working too much, too. He rarely saw her, only at night, and usually she was so tired she would fall asleep the instant they climbed into bed.

“I think something is wrong with her.”

His heart squeezed painfully. “How do you mean, wrong?”

“She’s not sleeping or eating properly.” Frances’s grey eyes grew anxious. “I saw her last night. It was very late, around two in the morning. She’d been in the study getting a book. She wore only her nightclothes and I could see how pale and thin she is.”

He nodded. Nicola’s weight loss on her arms and legs had worried him as well, but again he put the blame on the growing child inside her. “I’ll encourage her to eat more. The child is likely taking all her energy.”

“I might suggest we spend the day together tomorrow. Just the two of us…oh, no I can’t I promised mother I’d go sailing on the harbour with her and some friends.”

“I’ll organise something.” Nat rubbed his chin, thinking. “It’s been too long since we had time alone. Her days are filled with visiting the Home, I’ve let my business occupy my time and Mother’s arrival has dominated everything.”

“Nicola has been sadly neglected, Nat. We must do better.”

“Yes, you’re right, as always.” He smiled. “I’ll buy Nicola some jewellery. I don’t buy her enough pretty things. She never asks for anything.”

“Because that’s not Nicola’s way. She’s too good for you.” She chuckled.

“I know that.”

“Mother likes her, so that is something.” Frances tapped her reticule. “There have been times in the last few months when I have believed I was dreaming. It is incredible to think of our mother being here and of her behaviour, which is so different to how it was back home.”

“True. I couldn’t have been more surprised by Mother’s affections. Such a radical change gave me many doubts, but we’ve talked at great length about the past. She admits her dealings with us were shameful but she knew no better, it was how she was raised.”

“I’m sorry it took so long and Father’s death, for her to admit it though. Our lives could have been very different.”

Nat grasped her hand. “The past is done with. Although I was sceptical at first, and disbelieving of her intentions, Mother has done everything she can to make things right again between us. We must accept Mother’s apology and forgive her. She is trying to make amends and I cannot reject her.”

“I have forgiven her, but it is hard to forget her coldness sometimes. My childhood, and yours, was quite ruined because of her and father.”

He glanced out the window, remembering his childhood and the loneliness of it. The bond he always wanted with his father would never be now, but he had a chance with his mother, and despite the pain she inflicted on him as a child, he couldn’t refuse her offerings of love now. He’d waited too long for it. “She says she has changed and she is trying to show us. Can we turn our backs on her when she is trying so hard to make it up to us?”

“It wasn’t easy, Nat, when she first came. I expected the worst.”

“You weren’t alone in that.” He’d spent many sleepless nights curled up with Nicola, wondering at the change in his mother. Weeks of her showering love on him, showed him how wonderful it was to be cherished by a parent. Now, the love he’d always wanted to give his mother came pouring out. In part, he had to thank Nicola for change within himself, because her affection and devotion had shown him that to love another is not only fulfilling, but also healing.