Vital (7 page)

It’s hard to say
, I mumbled in my thoughts, trying to avoid the answers that would shine a guilty light on Dane.

Landen raised his eyebrows as his eyes caught mine, then stared deep into me. He knew then that I felt something off, but he didn’t understand why I wasn’t telling him I did. Truth was, I didn’t even really know. I guess it was just a protective instinct I had for Dane. I mean, he may have always been the one that made me feel safe back in Franklin, but when he followed me to help each of those images, I protected him, making sure I always knew he was at my side just before the force of energy was to rip us back into our reality. In a way, he followed me here, right into the hands of my fate, my demons - and I wasn’t going to let him get hurt because of that, even if he was acting like an idiot at the current moment.

Once inside our house, we made our way to the living room. I hadn’t cleaned up the mess from my nap, and the table was still pushed to the side and my blanket was lying across the floor. The sketch of the butterfly was open on the couch.

“Must have been some dream,” Landen muttered as he began to help me straighten up.

August took a seat on the couch next to my sketch. I could feel his concern for us growing.

“What did the two of you dream of?” he asked as we sat down next to him.

“I dreamed, not Landen, and I really don’t wanna talk about it,” I answered, quietly realizing that what I saw in that dream was starting to play out in front of me.

August sighed. “Well, any dream - no matter how violent it was - had to have given your mind the chance to play out its aggression. That’s a vital step in the right direction.”

I could feel Landen’s eyes on me as August spoke. I knew he was growing more and more concerned with my lack of apparent sleep, as well as how distant to reality I was becoming.

“What did you wanna talk about?” I asked, changing the subject.

August cleared his throat before he answered. “Ever since the day we faced Venus, I’ve been trying to convince Alamos to help me rebuild the looking glass.”

I saw Landen’s body tense and could feel the emotion of betrayal arise inside of him. He’d said on more than one occasion that he didn’t want the world to live in his intent. He truly believed that we could find a way around this demon without thinking for others.

“I know that upsets you,” August said, putting his hand on Landen’s knee, “but listen, I just want a way out of any doom that may lie ahead. As we move forward, I fear that the devil’s plans will prove more and more complex. I don’t want to rebuild it in the same manner that Donalt had; I want to rebuild it as a porthole, a way to circle back and make a different decision. If that were possible, then we’d never have to fear the death of any of us, and we could go back to the moment that led to that tragic decision.”

Landen stood and began to pace the floor in front of the couch, moving his head from side to side as he argued with his thoughts. “Even if that were possible, it still doesn’t feel right. I mean, this isn’t a game where when we die, we just begin again. Fate has a course it must travel.”

August smiled slightly and leaned into the couch. “Look at it from this point of view. We do die, and we do begin again, but when we begin again, we must learn everything over - and in the end, we only find ourselves a few footsteps closer to the fate we’re chasing. The looking glass would allow you to begin again, but not with the ignorance of new life.”

“Ignorance,” Landen mocked as he ran his fingers through his long, dark hair, still pacing the floor.

“Listen,” August said, catching Landen’s eyes as he paced, “you’ve lived over and over before, and you’ve fought this demon each time. To defeat you, he simply had to end your life and wait the course of time for you to grow into a man again. This is the life that you must defeat it. You must act as if this is your last chance – don’t live as if you have infinity because there’s no way to be sure that you do.” His words made us both freeze. He was right: there was no way to know where we were on this insane existence we were in. “We can’t make it that easy for him. Six planets and the sun still remain; that’s more than enough time for him to find a way to destroy you once and for all,” August finished.

I didn’t share Landen’s disapproval; if there was a way to go back and change the mistakes I’d made, I wanted it. “How far could the looking glass take us? I mean, could we go back to the beginning, the very beginning – before this stretched across so many lifetimes?” I asked.

August shook his head no and smiled at my eagerness. “Going back that far would cause more harm than good. We’re all weaved together perfectly; changing the slightest element could prove to be catastrophic. If my calculations are correct, the new looking glass would only be able to reach back a few hours, at the most a day.”

I let my shoulders fall as the idea of ending this all suddenly vanished.

“How are you so sure?” Landen asked, stopping in front of August. “What if you build it and it does reach back that far? What if we get so tangled in the past that we don’t see the present? What if that’s what the devil wants – for you to build him a porthole that will lead him back to destroy what we’ve done?”

Now look who’s being negative
, I thought in a teasing manner.

Landen’s eyes moved to me; it was clear he didn’t find my thoughts amusing.

“Well,” August said, “it will be a small miracle if we manage to create a porthole that will take you more than a few moments back. An hour, or even a day, is a high goal, but if you’re going to set a goal, you might as well make it worth it - and besides, the demon can’t come here.”

“You want to build it here?!” Landen said, louder than needed.

“The glass, the porthole will be where the last one rested - but the key, the power that gives it life will be here,” August corrected.

“What power? The medallion? That stays with Willow,” Landen argued.

“The rings,” August said as a smile beamed across his face.

“Where did you read that?” I asked, growing excited.

“I never read it. I was told; I’d just forgotten,” August answered.

“By who?” Landen asked, sitting on the table in front of the couch, ready to listen.

“Stella’s father,” August answered, grinning.

“Are you serious?” I said, leaning forward, completely captivated by this revelation.

August nodded, and his grin widened. “The original looking glass has always had a keeper, and the keeper has always come from one bloodline: Stella’s. The people in Esterious are very superstitious; they believe that doing something even slightly different would bring tragedy. Honestly, that’s what made them such an easy target for Donalt in the first place. But, anyway, Donalt did have priest oversee the construction of the looking glass. They spoke words that to the naked eye looked like magic, yet these priests, they didn’t have a clear understanding of the science, the engineering. Engineers were the ones that kept the rings in rotation, and Stella’s father was the last engineer to watch over the looking glass. Once he was seen as a traitor and executed for his actions, Donalt declared that there was no longer a need for an engineer, that the time to finally look through was upon us. That was eleven years ago; at that time, he was more than aware that your time was coming.”

“How was Stella’s dad an engineer? He lived in Atamentous – not Delen,” Landen questioned.

“Right, but this role was held secret, as it always has been with his bloodline. Once a month, he would travel to the palace and stay for seven days to monitor the working rings. It was in Delen that he saw me the first time. He witnessed me vanish with a young man into the string; months later, I was in Atamentous, helping someone find their soul mate when he approached me and questioned who I was. He had an absurd illusion that I was some kind of angel. I followed him to his home and explained our world to him; he begged me to take him, but I couldn’t because I feared the myths that you must be brought here by someone that loved you. When I asked how he’d seen me in two places that were so distant, he explained his secret role. He also told me that his family were true followers of Guardian, that they ensured that when Guardian left this world, he held the key that allowed him to change the recent past. He said that way Guardian wouldn’t die before his purpose was filled, as he did millions of years ago.”

“What key?” I asked, looking between August and Landen.

August patted my knee, proud that I was proving to be open minded. “He told me that Guardian left this world with a small version of the looking glass, that that version would allow Guardian to change the purpose of the looking glass, and he could do so from a blind distance to the devil. At the time, I thought he was lost in a sea of old wives tales. I never told him that it was Guardian and Aliyanna that created my world, that I was sure that Guardian was walking among us now; I knew that it would be too much for him to handle.” August leaned forwarded and folded his hands across his knees as he looked down, regret suddenly swarming through him. “I remember pondering what he meant by a small looking glass, how that would be seen in the eyes of the engineers so many years ago. I knew there was nothing like that in this world, so, like I said, I thought it was an old myth. But this morning, when Jason told me how the ring slipped from Willow’s finger, I had this vision of the ring spinning on its side. From there, I imagined both of your rings spinning inside one another. I honestly believe that the rings are the small looking glass Stella’s father was referring to.”

“That’s insane,” I whispered, looking down at my ring, trying to understand the reality that everyone in my life right now was meant to be there, that there are no mistakes in nature.

“Do you know what he meant? I mean, how are these rings gonna bring the rubble of that looking glass to life? How can we be sure that it’ll work the way it’s meant to?” Landen stressed.

August grinned widely at Landen. “I’m glad you’re asking questions now. I’m going to ask Stella if she knows anything; I just wanted to make sure that I told the two of you first.”

“She may not know anything,” I said bleakly. I loved Stella, but in my mind she was still so timid. In her eyes, I see the ghost of the darkness that each member of Esterious seems to carry.

“She knows her bloodline. In most cases, the engineers were all male, but at times there were only females left in the bloodline. Her father was teaching Evelyn the trade secrets back then. I’m more than sure that as close as those sisters were, she knows something. Anything will help us,” August answered.

I stood and went to the kitchen with the intent of calling Stella to come over. “The others are waiting on us; Drake is waiting,” Landen said, stopping me. It was clear he wanted no part of this; he thought our eagerness was blinding us from danger.

August shook his head. “I told Perodine that I was stealing both of you away for a few hours. Your father was going to tell Alamos and Drake to wait before they came.”

“Did you tell them why?” Landen questioned.

“No. I don’t want this action mentioned inside of Esterious - or the string, for that matter. I beg the two of you not even to discuss it in your thoughts. Perodine knows that I have something I’m looking into that the devil doesn’t need to overhear.”

“You think he’s listening? He can hear our thoughts?” I questioned as a sick feeling absorbed me. If that were true, then the ghost of Donalt knew that I struggled in the place where I must stand between Landen and Drake.

“I have no doubt. You can tell Drake and Alamos, but you must tell them here. If this works, the glass will emerge, and as far as anyone knows, there it will have the purpose to invoke intent. We’ll know that that purpose has diminished and that now its purpose is to always give us a second chance,” August answered.

I felt Landen’s stare, him judging my every emotion. I was no longer listening to August; I was too busy thinking of what I could have thought in Esterious, what emotions Donalt was aware of, how he could use those to drive a wedge between me and Landen.

I took in a nervous breath, refusing to look at him as I went to call Stella. I tried calling Stella’s house, then Felicity’s, but there was no answer. Before I went down the list of names in our family, I went back to the living room.

“Do you know if she’s in Esterious?” I asked August.

He shook his head no. “She should be here. Did you check at Aubrey’s house?” he asked.

I looked at Landen. I didn’t want to call there; I knew there was a chance that Clarissa would answer, and I wasn’t ready to talk to her.

“Will you call there?” Landen asked August.

He looked at us both curiously. “Should I know something?”

Landen tilted his head and let his eyes show the agony he felt for what those two were going through. “Dane and Clarissa are fighting, and somehow we’ve managed to find ourselves in the middle. We just don’t want to make it worse.”

“Clarissa...your Taurus sister,” August commented dryly as he stood to call Aubrey’s house.

I looked at Landen, trying to see if he knew what that last comment meant, but he just shrugged his shoulders, then leaned forward and buried his face in his hands. I slowly walked to his side, and he felt me coming and opened his arms. As I stood in front of him, he pulled me closer, laying his head on my chest. I let my fingertips run through his dark locks of wavy hair, taking in his energy; though he was full of stress, anger, and frustration, I felt his devotion to me, and I focused on that, trying to tell him in my own way that no matter what we had to hold on to, neither of us could afford to doubt that emotion; not now, not ever.