Vivid Lies (11 page)

Kane wordlessly hands me my camera and I look through the viewfinder, trying to pick where to start. There's so much to look at. So many colors. So many messages.
 

"Is it really vandalism when it's this beautiful?" I ask, focusing on a bleeding heart on the pillar near me.
 

The smell of paint lingers in the air, mixed with the salt water behind us. Each seat is unique. There's a large space where the seats have been removed, the ground below it just as colorful as the area surrounding it. I move on instinct, being drawn to one spot, then the next. Kane silently follows me down a long and winding corridor.
 

"How did you find this place?" I ask while I continue photographing.
 

"You see the luxury apartments over there?" I turn to look across the water. "This is the perfect place to photograph their windows with a high zoom. I go where my subjects take me."

"Is that legal?"

"If their blinds are open for anyone to see, it is."

It's here where the largest pieces of art are. Names written in graffiti lettering stand six feet tall. Bright pinks, blues, and greens mix in my mind to cover the red and orange of flames that haunt my mind. Every terrifying image is painted over with the illegal painting I see on the abandoned walls.
 

The words 'Dare to Live' stand proud and vibrant over all the other tags. Each letter stands taller than me, and I snap a panoramic of it. It's a big message, not just in its size.
 

From the top of the structure, I look down at the entire stadium. The Miami skyline is in the distance and the ocean is calm before me. I stop to appreciate the creativity and time it took to decorate every square inch of this venue. Illegal or not, this space isn't going to waste. I take a deep breath and realize that my hands stopped shaking.
 

"Thank you," I tell Kane who is standing a few feet away. He was giving me space, but never letting me get lost. "I could spend hours here, never seeing enough."

Kane gives me a half smile and I snap more photos. My favorite view is getting the art with the clear blue sky above. Kane leads me up a ladder to a metal bridge. Across the plank, a room with large windows overlook the stadium and the water. It used to be the control room. I snap another dozen or so photos until my battery starts to get low.
 

"I should get back," I say, my voice laced with disappointment. "Brooklyn will need the car soon."

Kane leads me out of the stadium. I hate leaving when I haven't seen it all yet.
 

"Where's your car?" as we cross the empty parking lot.
 

"The Sand Bar," I tell him. "Miles and his band played last night."

"Sounds like fun. Why didn't you leave with him then?" Kane's tone is flat like he doesn't really care, but he's watching me like he does.
 

"Not so much fun. Complicated. We got into an argument and I left, came home and found comfort in a whole bottle of wine."

"Do I need to kick his ass?"
 

"No," I say with a laugh and I shake my head. "We've known each other almost our whole lives. We fight like siblings."

"He didn't look at you like you were siblings."

I have nothing to say to that, so I don't. He saw Miles when he was in his most protective state. I know how Miles looks at me and I know how he looks at Brooklyn. It's probably similar to how Kane looks at her.
 

Back at the bike, he takes my camera bag. I am again picturing Kane and Brooklyn together last night. And Miles and Brooklyn together. How do I fit into all this? Is there even room for me?
 

It's never a competition, but it's always a battle. An unspoken and hidden war to be our own people but stay connected to the one person we care about more than anything.
 

"So, what's with the party last night? Special occasion?" I ask him. He wants to pry, I can too.
 

"No party. Just me," he says slowly as we get to his bike.

"All that alcohol for just you?"

"Something like that." Kane puts the helmet over my head.
 

"And my sister?"

Our eyes connect but I can't read him.
 

"You're destructive." Kane notices my eyes fall to a bite mark on his neck.
 

"You have no idea."

Silently, we mount his bike and start the long ride back to where I left my car. I'm slammed back into reality. Back where I'm forever tied to my twin sister, running from the man and the life that created us. Back where I no longer know what it is that I want because I am always thinking about what we need.
 

When we stop, I remove my death grip from Kane and get off the bike. I step out of reach so he won't help with the helmet again.

"Thank you for the ride," I say, handing him the helmet.

"Anytime."

I start to walk away but turn before getting in. Kane is watching me, motor off, eyes covered by his sunglasses.
 

"I'm not Brooklyn."
 

"I am well aware of your differences, London."

"She's callous and reckless. Destructive and unemotional at times. She will take everything, give nothing."

Kane pushes his glasses up to rest on his head. He examines me like he's seeing me for the first time.

"I want nothing from her, so you should worry about yourself for once and not her. Like I said, I am aware of your differences."

The loud rumble of his engine cuts us off and Kane pulls away.
 

Brooklyn

Our feet are hanging over the back of the couch. The bright pink nail polish on our toes is drying while we watch Teen Mom.
 

London finds the show disgusting. I think it's entertainment at its best. Never having seen my own mother struggle, I like imaging what it would have been like. I think London doesn't like to see what we might have missed.
 

Muffled voices come from the hallway.
 

"Shit. Miles," London whispers, flipping right side up. "I don't want to deal with him right now."

She sways for a moment from the head rush and hurries to the window.
 

"Are you going to jump?" I ask.
 

"No. Fire escape."

"Seriously?"

Then she's gone. She actually just crawled out our sixth floor window to get away from our best friend. I didn't talk to her the other night when she got back from the gig. I could sense the anxiety rolling off of her, so I didn't pry. When Miles was scarce most of the week, I figured things didn't go well.
 

I flip off the couch and head to the door to listen. Miles isn't alone. The other voice is deep and warms my entire body like only Kane can do. I bite my lip, uneasy with the both of them together.
 

"Just leave them alone," Miles says. "And stay away from London."

London? What does she have to do with Kane? Was he concerned for me or her? Miles has always been protective, but he's entering a new alpha territory here.
 

"I'm here for Brooklyn. Back off," Kane says. Why does he need to clarify that?

At first I was almost touched Miles cared enough to approach Kane. Is he worried about me at all?

"I don't care why you're here. Leave her alone. She doesn't need someone like you."

"Someone like what exactly?"

"Someone who will just hurt her. She's not a toy."

I've had enough.
 

"I can hear you guys," I say as I swing the door open.
 

Both men have the decency to look embarrassed. I put a hand on my hip and glare at the both of them.
 

"I can fucking take care of myself."

Miles looks down at the floor, knowing silence is his best defense. I may not have been able to save us from our father, but I can damn well stand up for myself against men like Kane. They are the ones who are actually transparent, no matter what lies come out of their mouths.
 

There is no confusion between Kane and me. He doesn't feed me bullshit. It's the men like my father whom I really fear. The ones you think love you, only to break you the worst way imaginable. They are the ones so manipulative and disguised that you never learn the truth, falling for their lies time after time.

"What can I do for you?" I ask Kane, licking my lips as I check him out obviously. He's in his leather jacket and dark jeans like usual. He looks controlled and sexy. I prefer him without control.
 

"I brought these," he says. In his hand are my red flip flops. The ones I wore over the night we fucked on a broken coffee table.
 

"Thanks."
 

We all stand awkwardly in the hall for a moment longer. Kane looks hesitant to leave and Miles looks even less ready to leave. I haven't talked to Kane since we slept together. I might owe that to him.
 

"Head on in," I tell Miles, kicking the door open for him. He opens his mouth like he might argue, but snaps it shut and goes inside. I'm guessing he is looking for London the ninja.
 

"Sorry about him," I start.

"He's like a damn guard dog with you two."

I laugh, not able to disagree with him.

"He's used to always protecting me and London. He doesn't get there isn't anything to protect us from here."

"What did he protect you from back home?"

I purse my lips and lean against the door. "That's a conversation for another time."

Kane steps forward, crowding me against the door. I can smell his soap and feel the heat coming off his chest.

"Is there going to be another time?"

I run my hands up his tight stomach and up to his chest. My fingers itch to rip the shirt off to feel his skin.
 

"You want there to be? But to be clear, I'm not really a fan of talking."

One side of his lips lift in a smirk.

"With you, that's the last thing I want to be doing."

I bite down on my lip and squeeze my thighs together. There's no doubt in my mind that Miles finally realizes my sister is gone and now has his ear pressed to the door. Reluctantly, I push Kane back and finally breathe in.
 

"I should go in."

Kane backs away and looks at the closed door over my shoulder. His jaw ticks under his five o'clock shadow.

"Your sister home?"

"Why? You want to see her?"

If Kane can hear the bite in my voice, he doesn't show it. He shakes his head and looks back down at me.
 

"Just wondering what Miles is doing in there."

"Listening at the door, no doubt. London jumped out the window before he got here."

To prove my point, I hear Miles curse on the other side. Everyone's concern with London is starting to piss me off. She was always strong no matter what torture we went through. Maybe because she wears her pain on the outside and it's obvious, they want to help her. Since I hide everything I think and feel, does that mean I don't need help? Did they forget that I was by her side through every lick of pain?

"Will I see you at Stephanie's this weekend?" Kane asks.

"I was going to see Miles and his band play with London. You should come," I say.
 

It's probably not a great idea, but I want to see Miles play. We used to go to every show back home, and both of us have been slacking lately. I want to keep Miles as my friend, even if he's annoying me most of the time.
 

"Sure. Text me with the details."

Kane starts to walk back toward his apartment and I open my door to find Miles waiting for me. I drop the flip flops on the floor and stare at him, waiting for him to start lecturing me.
 

"Have you eaten?" he asks instead.
 

I stand there blinking at him while he checks the sink for evidence that I did not in fact eat.
 

"I'm starving," I admit.
 

Miles nods and proceeds to order pizza. He doesn't bother asking me what I want since he knows everything about me. I return to the couch, a little peeved I missed that episode of Teen Mom. It's not the same without London anyway.
 

"You dating him?" Miles asks when he finally sits next to me.
 

"When is the last time I dated? Why do you care? Shouldn't you be worried about where London is right now?"

I swallow the lump in my throat. I am never jealous of my sister. I'm not even sure that what I feel right now is jealously or if I'm feeling left behind.
 

"She obviously doesn't want to see me. She knows about us last summer."