We Awaken (12 page)

Ashlinn’s eyes hadn’t left the playground the entire time we stood there. It wasn’t much, but there were bridges and slides and a swing set.

“We can go if you want,” I told her, and she began her descent immediately without even answering.

Climbing off the rocks was actually more difficult than going up. There were uneven ledges to jump between and small chasms and crannies to use as a steep staircase. I was forced to release her hand in order to cling to anything I could lay my fingers on.

When we finally hit solid ground, I said a silent prayer to whatever gods might be tuning in, thanking them for my not having lost any limbs. We also managed to not flash the children with our dresses, always a plus.

Ashlinn took no time to reclaim my hand as she skipped toward the swing set. One free swing was being eyed by a young boy, but I didn’t point him out to her. I just hurried up and all but threw her into the seat.

“I’ll push you. Hold your dress down.”

Standing behind her, I grabbed the chains and pulled back, bringing her along, then pushed her shoulder blades. Her back beneath my hands was warm and slightly sweaty, another reminder that she truly was here. Ellie was on the slide, dragging her feet along the sides as she went down in an attempt to brace herself from plummeting straight into the wood chips. She waved at us and began climbing the ladder again, not ashamed to be the oldest person on the playground apart from parents. A few were shooting unfriendly looks at the three of us, but nothing could bring me to care.

Ashlinn was flying through the air, the dress blossoming beneath her hands with each swing. She was laughing as if she had never been happier, and if anything kept the adults from kicking us out, I’d say that was it. No one would ever want to prevent such melodious joy.

Ellie called to me from the bridge she was running across, now with a trail of small children chasing her, but I couldn’t make out her words above the swing set’s metallic creaking. When Ashlinn came rushing toward me again, I wrapped my arms around the swing to stop its motion and ended up getting dragged as the momentum continued. When I let go, she stumbled out as I kneeled behind the swing with scraped legs.

“Well, that wasn’t the most elegant thing I’ve ever attempted.”

There were red wood chips inlaid in my knees and hands now, and I began picking at them as Ashlinn squatted next to me, staring. Ellie was laughing at my expense even though she was a fair distance away, and it spurred me onto my feet and toward her.

“What did you say?” I yelled up from the ground.

“We’ve got ten minutes left. Then it’s time to head toward the car. How much money do you have?”

“Sixteen dollars to spend.”

“Awesome, you’re buying us cashews.”

On one of the sidewalks snaking through the park there was a rickety little cart with a faded red umbrella above it. A man scooped our nuts into three small wax-paper bags. It was a sad excuse for a lunch, but with the amount of cash we had left, I was grateful for it. Judging by the blissed-out expression on her face, Ashlinn was as well.

We plopped ourselves on a bench right on the edge of Central Park, and as in all situations, Ellie had a story for this one.

“Once my mom saw a pigeon in one of those things, right in the glass with the nuts. The man just shooed it out and continued selling them. Don’t even think he was embarrassed that people saw.”

“If you’re trying to ruin my appetite with that nugget of info, I’m sorry to tell you it isn’t going to work,” I told her.

Ashlinn was watching the cars go by with intent, and the second a purple taxi passed, she smugly informed me that she was winning. I remembered us counting the cabs on our third date together and grinned like a lunatic.

“You have no chance of winning. We’re in New York and my color was yellow.”

I was scanning the streets for glimpses of the color and saw three canary yellow cars in a row. I jumped up to point them out so excitedly that I dropped some cashews. It would make a good dinner for the birds, at least. Ellie must have accepted that the whole thing was some sort of inside joke and just went on eating her nuts.

By the time we stopped, I had dozens of points while Ashlinn had spotted only two more purple cabs and no blue ones.

“As much as I hate to interrupt this truly riveting game of identifying colors, we really must start heading to the garage.”

Ellie seemed disappointed, but her emotions were amplified tenfold in Ashlinn. It looked as if her heart was breaking, and I felt mine go along with it.

“Don’t worry,” I told her. “We’ll come back.”

I wasn’t sure how true those words were, but it seemed like the right thing to say. Our journey back to the parking garage was tinged with the sadness of having to return to New Jersey. We didn’t have to sprint as much and speed-walked like I had a tendency to do through the hallways of school. Hand in hand we headed to our way home. Thankfully, Ellie had enough money for the time we’d spent, and we were able to hit the road at midday when many were just arriving.

Both Ellie and Ashlinn were worn out from our little foray into the city, but it felt like I was only starting to wake up. We passed an old indie movie theater that looked like something hipsters would frequent with cans of Pabst Blue Ribbon in hand. A poster for
An American in Paris
was framed outside the door.

“Look, it’s you,” Ellie said when we got caught in traffic next to the building. She was gesturing at the image of Gene Kelly as he danced across the painted poster.

“I wish.”

Ashlinn scoffed. “What does he have that you don’t?”

If we were facing each other, I would have dumbly stared at the girl for a few seconds.

“That’s Gene freaking Kelly. He has absolutely everything plus some. Are you telling me you’ve never seen
Singin’ in the Rain
?” The thought was a blasphemous one. Ellie sighed in the front seat, probably remembering our elementary-school days when I spoke of little apart from movie musicals and old dancers. She had been subjected to several marathons, poor girl.

“I haven’t seen most movies. That shouldn’t really come as a surprise to you.”

“I guess not. That settles it. We are going home, building a blanket fort, making a disgusting amount of popcorn, and watching this cinematic masterpiece.”

“And I will be as far away as humanly possible,” Ellie informed us before wishing Ashlinn luck.

The drive home was an easy one, and the air of nervousness from this morning had mostly melted away. No one brought up any controversial conversation topics. There was just excitement about all the time I’d be able to spend with Ashlinn. Waiting for the results of my audition would be hellish, but I imagined she’d find several ways to keep my mind off it.

It was the afternoon by the time The Hovercraft pulled up outside my house.

“I’m going to go take a six-hour-long shower and exfoliate. This whole slept-in then-citified look isn’t really working for me. Hey,” Ellie tacked on like an afterthought, although she probably had wanted to ask us all day, “would you two care to join me when I get my tattoo in three days?”

“Absolutely,” Ashlinn exclaimed before I could have any say in the matter, and Ellie looked relieved as she told my girlfriend to “enjoy the excruciatingly long dance numbers.”

The advice she offered me was different.

“Don’t change for anyone, Victoria,” she told me as if I were intending to. “Now get out of my car, you whatever-you-ares.”

I unlocked the house with the key I was grateful to have remembered. It was different to be with Ashlinn in the living room with light. Everything had been calm and illuminated by the moon until it exploded into a trip to New York, but this felt average. It didn’t seem like a situation she belonged in. This was real life. What if we ran out of things to talk about? Or if I lost whatever sparked her interest in me? I couldn’t deal with a life consisting of the sound of forks against plates, like what I shared with Mother.

The cross-body bag got tossed next to my school one where it sat in the corner. I think she noticed my wariness as we stood facing each other right inside my entryway because, like the wonderful person she is, she just said “
Star Wars
.”

“What?”

“
Star Wars
. You expected me to know about movies, and that’s one I basically get the whole plot of. Siblings that kiss. Talking metal men. There’s some crazy stuff going on in the films you guys watch.”

It was absolutely absurd and completely gorgeous.

“Why that movie?”

“I’ve had to concoct a lot of dreams based on it.”

That made sense. I grabbed her hands in mine and began swinging our arms, not for any reason other than that I could.

“I always pretended to hate that series growing up because my dad loved it more than most things. It was funny when he’d get angry over me insulting it.”

“Very devious of you,” she said, then stood on her tiptoes and leaned toward my face.

For a second it seemed like she was making to kiss me on the mouth, and all my limbs locked in place, confused, but instead her lips landed straight on the tip of my nose.

“Okay?” she questioned. “Sorry, I probably should have asked first.”

“No, that was nice.”

I didn’t meet her eyes. A part of me was hoping I’d never get used to this, that her affection would amaze me every time.

“Well, I was promised a blanket fort and some popcorn. Shall we?”

She released my hands and looked at me as if awaiting directions. After regrouping for a few seconds, I sent her around to grab every blanket and pillow she could find on this floor, telling her to open closets and dismantle couches, while I began searching for popcorn in the cabinets.

As it popped she walked past the kitchen with two blankets balanced on her head and another dragging on the floor behind her like the train of a gown. There were so many pillows stacked up in her arms I don’t know how she could see over them at all. Sheets were stuffed in randomly among everything else and looked like they were getting ready to tangle in her legs.

“At least if you trip, you have something soft to land on.” I laughed, grabbing half of the pillows.

In an attempt to remove the blanket from her head, I just ended up pulling it over her eyes. She shook it off like a disgruntled puppy would, and I did my best not to look as endeared as I felt. A weak facade. I never claimed to be an actor, only a dancer.

She began her journey to the living room yet again and I followed. After dumping the beginnings of our cushiony cocoon, the microwave beeped and I ran back to get the popcorn.

“It’s not much of a meal—”

“It’s perfect. Do you realize how amazing that smells? Humans don’t know how lucky they are.”

Her wonder was completely unbridled and utterly contagious. The popcorn did smell nice, but honestly her appreciation of it made any other pleasantness pale in comparison. I placed the bowl far away on the floor and looked at the lump of blankets. We were going to need a game plan for how to go about arranging them into a fort.

“Ever had a sleepover before?” I asked while grabbing one side of a crocheted orange quilt. She grabbed the other end so we could pull it over the couch.

“My entire life is a sleepover. I have inadvertently ‘slept over’ at most everyone’s house at one point or another.”

“You know perfectly well that doesn’t count. We’re going to have a proper sleepover. The blanket-fort-movie combo is a good start. Next we’re gonna need ‘would you rather’ and scary stories. By the end of the night, our bras will probably end up in the freezer.”

Her eyes widened at the thought. We laid a blanket over the couch and stacked pillows on top in an attempt to anchor it.

“Are you sure you even know what happens at a sleepover? I’ve seen some crazy things in the minds of teenage girls, but frozen undergarments tend to stay out of it.”

“I’ve seen lots of movies that have sleepovers in them, so close enough. And I spent a lot of time sleeping over at Ellie’s back in middle school. We mainly just watched marathons of
Law & Order
in her basement.”

I folded the other end of the quilt over a chair, and she mirrored that on her end. Then we draped blankets over the top so they covered every side except for an opening in the front that we’d be able to view the television through. The remainder of the blankets and pillows got shoved into the fort. With an outstretched arm I gestured for her to enter.

“Ladies first.”

She curtsied, then crawled inside, and I clumsily followed with popcorn in tow after putting in the DVD and grabbing every remote. There wasn’t a great deal of room, but we managed to sit a few inches apart in opposite corners with our backs to the foot of the couch.

“Get pumped up for this masterpiece you are about to witness. The makeup is excessive and the musical numbers are unnecessary.”

She glanced over at me. “Stop making excuses for the thing if you love it so much.”

And with that I shrugged and pressed Play.

ASHLINN WAS
completely absorbed from the second the 20th Century Fox logo popped up in glorious Technicolor. I didn’t have the heart to fast-forward through the opening credits. Not staring at her was difficult. There’s only so long you can look at someone out of the corner of your eye without going dizzy, so I allowed my head to tilt toward hers as I watched her wonderment. It was humbling to know that someone who could bring about so many miracles was thrilled by one of our silly entertainments.

When “You Were Meant for Me” began playing, I could see she was being sucked in by the overly cheesy romanticism of it all. The tone changed for that single scene, and blue light emanating from the screen bathed our little sanctuary in an aqueous glow. Usually I would be bored by that particular dance, but watching her watch it was invigorating.

She had been gradually inching closer to my side, so I eased her journey and sidled up to her. Ashlinn’s head took no time to find its way to my shoulder after that, and by the next scene, my arms were around her. During the following number, she used me as a backrest instead of the couch, and my legs were curled around her waist like a belt. No one had ever allowed me to get so close before, and it was already an addiction.