What If... All the Rumors Were True (22 page)

INCURABLE FLIRT

Just because a guy and a girl are sitting alone together, it doesn't mean they're flirting. Unless they're groping each other under the table.

H
aley and Sasha rode to Bubbies bistro in Sasha's vintage Mustang at around eleven on Saturday night. Sasha parked right out front and the two girls went inside to pick up Johnny from work.

The dinner seating was over and the restaurant was pretty quiet, nearly empty, with most of the waiters and bus boys clearing the last of the tables and adding up tips.

“There he is,” Sasha said, spotting Johnny in a back corner. She and Haley headed toward him, then Haley suddenly stopped. Johnny wasn't alone at the table: sitting with him, just tucking into a late supper salad, was the big-haired beauty Mia Delgado.

“What's he doing with
her
?” Sasha gasped.

“I don't know,” Haley said, but from the way he was leaning forward and the quiet, intimate way they were speaking, it didn't look good.

“Let's go find out,” Sasha said, storming over to them. “Johnny, your ride's here.”

Johnny looked up, startled. “Sasha—I didn't think you'd get here so early.”

“I can see that,” Sasha said.

“I'm all ready to go—I'll go finish up and get my tips.” Johnny stood up and pushed through the swinging doors into the kitchen, untying his apron.

Mia smiled at Haley and Sasha. “Hello, girls. I love the food here, don't you?”

“It's grrreat,” Sasha snarled.

Johnny returned a few minutes later. “Let's roll,” he said. He gave Mia a little smile and a wave. “See you. Glad I could help with that…thing.”

“Goodbye, Johnny. See you another time,” Mia said. “Good luck with…you know.” She winked at him. Haley could feel Sasha stiffen beside her.

Haley climbed into the backseat while Johnny rode shotgun and Sasha started the car. The tension between them made Haley nervous. She had a bad feeling she was about to witness another historic fight. She sometimes felt there should be Civil War–type plaques posted around town to commemorate all of the famous Sasha-Johnny battles that had taken place.

“So?” Sasha said, pulling away from the curb. “Don't you have anything to say for yourself?”

“Sash, Mia is a Bubbies regular,” Johnny said. “She flounces in with a different guy every night. Things were slow, I was finished with my shift, so I was just making small talk with her to pass the time.”

Sasha rolled her eyes. “Small talk? Please. What was that little thing she said when we were leaving—‘Good luck with
you know
'? Good luck with
what
?”

“Nothing, Sash, I swear. You know how Mia is. Everything she says sounds like a come-on.”

“So she was coming on to you, is that what you're saying?” Sasha was livid.

“Sasha, no!” Johnny said. “You've got to believe me. Haley, talk some sense into her, will you?”

What's Haley supposed to think? She keeps catching Mia in compromising situations. They can't all be innocent mistakes, can they?

If you are sure Mia is trouble and feel that Haley should warn Sasha that Mia has been flirting with Johnny since day one in Hillsdale, go to
"JOHNNY BE GONE"
. If you'd rather Haley encourage Sasha to give Johnny the benefit of the doubt, go to
"HAPPY ENDING"
. And if you believe Haley should stay out of Sasha and Johnny's love life altogether, send her to focus on real drama on
"THEATRICAL RELEASE"
. Finally, if you think Mia's asking for trouble and Whitney should know what she's been up to, send Haley to
"HIGH SCHOOL HOME-WRECKER"
.

No man is safe with Mia around. Which means neither is any girl with a boyfriend, brother or father.

BASEMENT DWELLERS

What happens in the basement stays in the basement.

“T
he way you stood up to your parents was so cool, Irene,” Haley said enthusiastically. “I mean it. My parents aren't half as strict as yours, but still, when it comes to certain issues they're touchy on, I sometimes chicken out.”

Haley and Irene were lounging on the couch in Haley's basement, flipping through channels on the TV and working their way through a big bowl of popcorn. It was almost midnight on Saturday night and Haley's parents and Mitchell were in bed. Irene, at Haley's urging, had refused to obey her parents' wish that she quit working on the sets for the school play and spend more time at the Golden Dynasty instead. Haley thought Irene was such an incredible artist that she shouldn't let her talent go to waste, and Irene was beginning to believe in herself, too. Maybe, from now on, Irene's parents would start to see their daughter with new eyes as well.

“I'm still glad I'm sleeping over at your house tonight,” Irene said. “Just in case…you know, they decide to backslide and chain me to the hostess station.”

“Just let them try,” Haley said. “Devon and Shaun and I will cut you free with a chain saw.”

“Don't let Shaun near a chain saw,” Irene said. “Ever.” Haley laughed.

There was a tapping on the basement window. “Did you hear something?” Haley said.

“I bet it's the boys.”

Haley went to the window and drew the curtain aside. Shaun's big blond face was pressed against the glass like a smashed pumpkin. Haley almost screamed, but caught herself just in time.

“Let us in!” Shaun said in a deep, creepy voice.

“Shhh!” Haley said. “Come around to the door.” She opened the basement door and Shaun and Devon snuck in.

“Oh yea, poppers.” Shaun dug his hand into the bowl and stuffed his mouth with a fistful of popcorn. “Hales, you got any chocolate sauce?”

“Are you forgetting where you are?” Haley said. Her parents refused to keep anything sugary in the house. “I can get you wheatgrass juice or carrot shavings. Take your pick.”

“Whatever.” Shaun shrugged. “My stomach can take anything you throw at it.”

“Be right back.” Haley quietly went upstairs for some soda water and glasses and a few condiments for the boys. When she came back down she found Shaun on his hands and knees, bucking his legs and yelling, “
Hee-haaww! Heeee-haaawww!
Come on Irene, you up for a ride?”

Haley glanced at Devon, who looked nervous. Irene's eyes darted from one friend to another, embarrassed.

No way,
Haley thought. She'd heard the rumors, but she didn't think they could really be true. Not even Shaun would take Method acting that far….

But there he was, honking and bucking in his most donkey-brained fashion, even without the papier-mâché head.

Shaun certainly puts his whole heart—or ass—into everything he does, and he's apparently unembarrassable. The same can't be said of Irene, though—or Haley. Maybe the creative types have gotten a little too freaky for Haley's taste.

If you think Haley should forget the theater crowd and focus on her upcoming academic challenges, send her to
"TESTING LIMITS"
. If you believe Haley's loyalty, both to her friends and to the theater, will overcome any distaste for Shaun's antics, go to
"THEATRICAL RELEASE"
.

Shaun has certainly been tamed a little by Irene, but will she keep him as her pet? Or will Mr. Chen impose a catch-and-release?

TESTING LIMITS

A mind is a terrible thing to waste.

T
he moment of truth—or at least the first of many—arrived. In the last five days the junior class brain trust had taken the IQ test, the PSAT, the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator…and they were utterly exhausted.

“I can't even speak I'm so fried,” said Annie, fanning herself with a notebook and putting her feet up on the Metzgers' coffee table.

“My brain feels like the densely compressed center of a black hole,” Dave babbled. “Or maybe a freshly split nucleus.” He continued with more spacy nonsense and then trailed off, stopping midsentence.

Annie had told Haley in confidence earlier that Mrs. Metzger was worried about Dave and had sent him to a psychiatrist for observation. However, after his earlier meltdown on the “Inside Hillsdale” videocasts, he now seemed to be acting fairly normal.

“Well, I feel great,” Haley reported proudly. “I actually kind of liked taking the IQ test. It was sort of…fun.”

Only Haley had managed to make it through this firestorm with her wits fully intact. After one good night of sleep, she'd recovered from the testing circuit, no sweat. “I think studying with Alex really helped me prepare mentally,” she added. “I mean, he'd taken all these tests before and let me know exactly what to expect.”

“I saw the chemical reaction happening between you two from the very beginning,” mumbled Dave. “Like a gas burner meeting a highly flammable substance—puff. Ignited uncontrollably.”

“There must be something you two do together besides study,” Annie said, pressing for more details before a yawn got the best of her. For the first time since Haley had known her, Annie was actually too tired to interrogate her. Haley could tell by the exhausted look in Annie's eyes that what she really needed was a nap. Apparently, Dave did too. He'd just fallen asleep in his chair sitting up and was now snoring loudly.

“Okay, on that note…I'm going to give Alex a call and see if he wants to hang out. You people need to get some sleep.”

Judging by the sparkle in Haley's eye as she shot up, it was obvious she was looking forward to seeing her senior “friend” again. She had already started dialing Alex's phone number as she walked toward the front door.

“See ya later, Annie,” Haley said with a playful grin.

 

THE END